Hey everybody, Sheila here. Thought you’d heard the last of me right? Well , I got called in on a mission. Okay, so it’s time for another blood flowing (not mine, I have an aversion to fast moving bodily fluids, mine not others!), adrenaline pumping death-defying feat of investigative genius! Alas, not this time.
So here we are at the ISIS office, we being Major Analee, William St. Michael (who frequently introduces himself as Michael to keep the confusion factor high), a baby-faced killer known only as James-with-numerous-last-names and me. After receiving our brief, one thing is clear … we have NO plan. We are to interrupt the sale of unknown information and/or software to a hacker named Fain and a woman calling herself Sara Glover.
While Mr. ADA man, William/Michael St. Michael remains at the office to doctor photos (making him a dual-professional who can defend his own malpractice case) of Baby-Face and change the ISIS database, thus turning Baby-Face into a hacking industrial spy killer, the major, James and I go to the city. Analee goes to the Four Seasons Hotel, where Miss Glover (although there is some debate as to her marital status) is staying, while I go to the apartment of our target, Mr. Givens.
Wanting to discern whether or not said target was home at the time, I placed a discreet call to his residence. However, his live-in girlfriend denied that Mr. Givens was ever a subscriber to Big Uns magazine and may have become slightly perturbed. I find a wonderful little caffeine … um coffee shop nearby and wait.
Meanwhile, Analee makes contact with the hotel security manager and convinces him to provide us with a fingerprint from the room of one Miss/Mrs. Sara Glover. Her work there being done, she makes her way to a chess club to mate.
James goes to work. Our loosely constructed plan calls for him to make some sort of contact with Miss/Mrs. Glover, which will, hopefully, be caught on the hotel video surveillance cameras. After countless hours of pretending to possess literacy skills in the lobby, he goes to the bar. Mr. Givens enters the bar and sits nearby. James ascertains the time and walks away when Miss/Mrs. Glover comes in.
He decides to wait out on the street, but his patience wears thin and he proceeds back into the hotel. Thinking to make it appear as though he is avoiding detection, he makes to rush past the couple, who are descending the steps, but fails his dice roll and performs a (nearly) perfect one and a half twisting stair dive, almost knocking our target over in the process. As Mr. Givens assists him, Miss/Mrs. Glover glares.
Having determined that Mr. Givens is not home, he does not subscribe to any porno magazines, this coffee shop makes really good shit (although the bathrooms could be more conveniently located) and I have a new addiction to deal with, I wait for the major and James to pick me up.
James is quiet, but the major is in good spirits having mated successfully at least once tonight. We find a hotel room, they go to sleep and I check out the all night programming that New York has to offer. Although that annoying drumming in the TV, oh wait, that was my heart.
William/Michael St. Michael has proven to be an indispensable member of the team, as he shows up with caffeine and bagels in the morning. Although some of the team members are showing some fatigue, I am raring to go.
ADA William/Michael St. Michaels and I go to Mr. Givens office to scare him with some Baby-Face photos and veiled threats. After our interview, which is mildly successful, we go out to find that the ADA’s car has been towed. Although, ordinarily civil servants tend to make me irritable and cranky, the next five hours were among the most enjoyable of my life.
After several hours of getting the run around, the ADA manages to free his vehicle from the hand of the parking oppressors. (I am told that Vegas is offering very good odds that a murder in New York City will be reported under the headline Civil Servants Strangled by Red Tape within the next few weeks.)
Analee has successfully obtained the necessary fingerprints and some very interesting video prints of our staircase Olympian. Armed with new proof that Mr. Givens has in fact made contact with the notorious killer James, who is up to about five murders now, we call Mr. Givens to invite him to the office for continued conversation.
Surveillance of Fain has not led to, well anything, but Analee wants to cover all bases, so she goes there, while the ADA and I await the arrival of Mr. Givens at the District Attorney’s office. The killer, James, is discreetly observing the hotel entrance for signs of Miss/Mrs. Sara Glover, that is, when the authorities are not ordering him to move his car from its illegal curbside position.
Mr. Givens arrives, and he and William/Michael St. Michaels have a conversation in legalese, a language I choose not to learn, although I am impressed to learn that James is now responsible for more than ten murders. I take advantage of the ADA’s bowel discomfort to get a moment alone with Mr. Givens and explain that in order to avoid mutilation and dismemberment, he need only cooperate with us. Apparently he is not fluent in legalese eiter, because now he seems to understand.
We receive word that the deal will take place that evening at the Roxy. We arrive early to find inconspicuous spots to wait and watch. However, James, the super goon, is about to be accosted at the bar by two burly looking bad dudes. I grab him and propel him gently into the crowd. They follow. William/Michael St. Michaels takes up the chase of the goons, and bumps into one. Although he apologizes profusely, the gentleman’s nose is out of joint and he pulls a knife. William fells him with a judo chop, puts his nose truly out of joint and gets escorted to the door by the bouncers. At this time, Analee, wanting to allay Mr. Givens’ fears, “arrests” the fiendish felon, James, and takes him to the door, as well. After handing him over to William, she returns to the bar. The ADA has pleaded his case to the sympathetic bouncers, and rolled well enough to be allowed back into the bar. He unloads James by handing him over to four bullet-proof vested unidentified men who are looking for James-with-numerous-last-names, and returns to the bar (after paying another cover charge).
Analee’s mission now becomes find James, as there are no other ISIS people in the area and she doesn’t know who has taken him or where he is. In the meantime, we have managed to spot our targets. Sara, who is now known as Sara Windbone, an out of work mediocre actress, an unknown man, Mr. Givens and his live-in girlfriend, Marilyn Clark. Unfortunately, I lost sight of the unknown man. I go to find Mr. Givens only to be accosted by his Big Uns hating jealous girlfriend. I give her a bottled drink and continue towards Mr. Givens, who has now handed over the bag of goodies to Sara. She runs, I give chase. After many attempts, I get the bag from her, only to have her come up and grab it again. I punch her in the face, but she won’t let go. I give her a bottled drink as well, but unfortunately, the lights in the club go on at that time, and apparently it is unlawful to give someone a bottled drink with any kind of force in this state.
By now, the place is swarming with all sorts of law enforcement personages. On the brighter side, I find James.
Anyway, as this turns out to be a case of insider trading, ISIS doesn’t get to keep any of the money. I consider this case to have been a bust (both literally and figuratively).