Title: The Honeymooners
Author: Ziggy
Rating: duh
Disclaimer: I own nothing of Jareth or the labyrinth,
created by the wonderful Jim Henson...I just like to
toy around with them a little now and then <g>
Archive: sure, especially UGL
Feedback: pwease?

**********************

part 1

      I listlessly watched the television as "The Great
Muppet Caper"
played out on the screen. Normally I would have been
thrilled; it's
one of my favorite movies to chill out in front of,
but I couldn't
get over the feeling of being a bird in a cage, no
matter how wonderful
that cage was. "So this is what house arrest is like,"
I muttered to the cat,
who sat on his chair, watching me with sleepy eyes. I
don't know exactly
how it manages to happen, but everytime I go home, as
soon as I step foot
in the door and my father sees me, I automatically
become twelve years old again.
So here I was, stuck inside, not allowed off the
premises unless I had some huge
activity planned or had an escort. In short, life
really sucked at the moment.

      "Enjoying your vacation?" a smooth voice chortled and
I didn't even have to
look up from where Gonzo was throwing himself in front
of a cab to see who it was.

      "What does it look like, Genius?" I retorted, doing
my exercise for the day
by sitting up.

      "Don't you have anything that could keep you busy?"
he asked from his sprawled
position in the recliner, raising an eyebrow at me.

      "Of course...I could write, I could make puppets, I
could sew or draw or actually
organize my stuff...but none of it gets me out of
here...might as well put a shackle on my
ankle and give me a harmonica," I grumbled, crossing
my arms and making a face in disgust.
"Even the Muppets get to run around England and I
can't even wander around Cincinnati!!!" I
blurted, pointing to the screen and glancing back at a
highly amused Goblin King who looked
strangely sympathetic. "What do I owe this visit to?"

      "I had to get out...I've been running myself ragged
lately trying to clean
up after the Villain's Ball and what with that duel
and all...plus the torments I go through
from you and the others on UGL," he grumbled,
stretching his arms above his head and sighing softly.
"I've decided to take a vacation-"

      "Really? A vacation? You mean from all the lists,
from the labyrinth itself? Jareth...
I don't know how to tell you this, but everything will
go to hell in a handbasket faster than
the cleaners got through the tunnels...are you sure?"

      "Of course...I have things under control...I put
Didymus in charge," he replied easily,
smirking at my raised eyebrows. "He's smarter than he
looks...most of the time," he corrected himself,
his smirk growing bigger at my face. "The lists have
been complaining of my presence lately...let them
suffer for a week or so, it's about time they find out
how useful I really am," he grumbled, picking up
the morning paper, glancing over it, and tossing it at
the cat, who merely watched as it floated to the
ground,
then jumped down from his chair and fell asleep across
Dear Abby.

      "Well...yeah, I suppose you could use a break...so
why'd you come here, are you letting everyone
know of your absence or something?"

      "Not particularly...I just thought since you were
feeling cooped up that you might like to join me..."
he trailed off, glancing in my direction. Needless to
say, the request startled me.

        "What, do you need me so you can get a special rate
at a hotel or something?"

      "There you go again...every time I try to do
something nice you turn it into me trying to be cheap!

I actually already have a place...a cottage in a
forest in the realm of Fae, far away from everyone and
everything,"
he insisted, narrowing his eyes at my suspicious face.

      "So why invite me?"

      He shrugged."I don't know, I was just wanting some
company and since you're one of
the people that I can actually stand most of the
time..."

      "This wouldn't have anything to do with me putting
out at the Villain's Ball, would it?"
I asked, skeptical, and he reddened slightly.

      He was quicker on the uptake than I thought. "I just
thought that since we were actually being
civil towards one another and were both feeling
rather...uptight that this might be a way for us to
have fun
with each other for once," he replied, shrugging.

      I paused, biting my lip. It /was/ tempting, but
still...the last few excursions with the
goblin king had been so much more than what they
seemed. "This isn't like that softball game where
you bet me so I could kiss you, is it? Or going to
space camp and nearly getting killed? What about that
house with all the demonic kewpie dolls!!!" I accused,
unintentionally pulling myself into a
fetal position at the mention of those horrid plastic
vile creatures.

      "Nothing like that," he insisted, his hands facing
palms toward me. "This is just about
the two of us unwinding and relaxing
together...consider it a second honeymoon," he
murmured, his eyes
searching my face for a reaction.

      "We never had a first!" I muttered, rolling my eyes
and making a face.

      "Well there you go! It's a chance for me to make
things up to you...without the business of that
whole marriage business..."

      "How long?" I asked, not able to stand the thought of
staying cooped up for another minute.

      "Five days or so...maybe a week," he replied and I
nodded, frowning thoughtfully.

      "And what would this involve again?"

      "Nothing you didn't want...just us getting to know
each other again,
walking through the woods, maybe an occassional
swim...watching movies...and if the mood
was fitting...lots of sex," he added, eyes downright
wicked. I chuckled, shaking my head in amusement.
One thing you had to hand to Jareth was that he was
incredibly honest.

      "Well..." I mumbled, stretching languidly and
standing. "I suppose it's better than
what I've got going on here at the moment...okay,
sure, I'll play along..."

      "Perfect! You won't regret this, love," he exclaimed,
leaping to his feet and grasping my hand gently.
In a sparkle and a flash we were gone.

=====

Part 2

      I honestly don't know what I was expecting Jareth's
home away from the palace
to be, but it definitely did /not/ match the picture
that was in my mind. We appeared a few
yards away and I gave a low whistle as I looked
around. There was a large, crystal-clear lake a ways
down a grassy hill,
and I smiled in spite of myself at the sight of random
fairies floating around in the tall grass.
Thick woods surrounded the area, the trees being
varieties that were not familiar to me, and probably
something
native to the land. A large, flowering garden,
complete with benches, path, and fountain lay in front
of the most
gorgeous house I had ever laid eyes on. It looked like
it had been carved from sparkling white marble
by some omnipotent hand, the sharp angles of stone
softened by the wildflowers that twined around the
edges of the house. It wasn't exactly small,
either...it was a cottage fit for a king, that much
was certain.

      "It's beautiful...Jareth, I had no idea you had a
place like this," I murmured, my eyes
as big as plates as I watched the sun bounce off the
marble, nearly blinding me.

      He shrugged and tugged me into the garden. "Just
because I'm the goblin king doesn't mean
that I can't have nice things..." he replied and I
nodded, too dazed to speak. I inhaled the scent of
fresh flowers, the
abundance of fragrances as intoxicating as the scenery
around me. "After all," Jareth continued, walking
along the garden path until he
came to a black marble bench, "villains need to relax,
too," he murmured, sinking onto the bench and letting
his eyes drift closed,
his breathing easier than I had seen it in a while. I
wondered at that moment how well I really knew
Jareth...I had been under his vision for
a while, but still...how well did I really know him?
"Better than most," he mumbled, opening an eye and
watching me lazily, laying on his back on the bench,
his legs dangling off the far end. "Especially after
that villain's ball incident...you're more open to the
concept of there
being more to me than someone to torture or fight than
most of the labyfic list members, at least," he
continued easily as I wandered along the
path, my eyes filled with all kinds of vibrant green
bushes, blooming flowers, and vines twining round
stone sculptures of the Greek gods.

      "True...but I actually am surprised you have such
amazing taste," I murmured, only half-joking as I let
the fountain
water trickle from the stone fairy's water jug that
was it's centerpiece, and over my fingertips, smiling
at the crisp coolness as its rivulets
dwindled down my arm. "Dare I say it, I think I'm
actually going to enjoy my stay here," I added,
walking slowly towards him, my eyes
fixed on the path which seemed to be made of
crystaline pebbles that fairly glowed under my feet.

      "I hoped you would...it will be nice to have some
sort of halfway decent company around," he mumbled,
grinning lazily without having to
open my eyes to see my reaction.

      "Gee, thanks, I think," I retorted, making a face and
raising his head slightly so I could
sit on the bench, his head in my lap.

      "Well even I don't like to be alone all the time..."
he replied.
I considered this as my fingertips gently sunk into
his hair, carding through it gently. It was so soft
and fine,
I didn't know exactly what it was like...almost like
fuzzy sunbeams.
     
      "You're not alone...you've got your subjects and two
listfuls of listians..." I replied softly, humming
lightly as I began to
massage his temples.

      "I know...but sometimes it still feels that way," he
answered softly, and I paused, the somberness of his
statement striking me deeply.
It shouldn't be that way...not to someone like him.

      "Well don't...we all adore you...fad villains may
come and go, but why do you think we're all still here
with you? You may
frustrate the hell out of me sometimes, but if I
didn't care so much about you, I wouldn't be here," I
told him, slightly startld at his
soft, contented purr as my fingertips worked his
temples and the sides of his neck. Despite my claims
to be able to handle anything, I still
started slightly when he grasped one of my hands and
pressed it to his lips.

      "Which is why I brought you here...you can appreciate
this...and you're usually all right when we're alone,
without others to
encourage you...and besides, you need a break as much
as I do...don't want to look into a crystal one day to
see that you've
spontaneously combusted," he said softly, his
fingertips circling lightly on the inside of my wrist.

"Besides, there is the fact that I like you," he
murmured, and I could feel my cheeks burn at the
simple honestly of the sentence, and his gesture of
suddenly sucking my index finger into his mouth,
swirling his tongue round it languidly.

      All of a sudden it was very hard to breathe. I opened
my mouth to speak and couldn't get a single word out,
and things did not improve when
I looked down at his face to see his eyes open,
regarding me as his tongue bathed my finger. Somehow,
I couldn't let the moment last. My hand shot out
and yanked firmly enough on his hair, and Jareth
immediately sat up in surprise.  Laughing, I jumped up
and ran full speed to the other side of the garden,
trying my best not to topple anything over. Turning at
the statue of Athena, I giggled upon seeing Jareth
standing at the bench, a very indignant statement
on his face. Until apparently he got an idea, because
I could see the tell-tale glimmer in his eyes.
Turning, I high-tailed it out of the garden,
dodging a few trees until I was a not too far into the
forest, but far enough so I wouldn't be seen. I bit my
lip and crouched behind a bush, hushing my
breathing as much as I could while I waited. Too bad
for me, I had forgotten about his ability to pop up
out of nowhere. My face must have been
priceless when I heard his cough and whirled to see
him directly behind me, arms crossed and a large
catlike grin on his face.

      "No fair!!" I cried, trying to make a run for it.

      "Oh no you don't..." he growled, grabbing me round
the waist and pushing me against a large tree trunk,
deep
chuckles escaping from his throat. "I'm allowed to use
whatever resources I have, I can't help it if you're
just a mortal," he
teased, and I stuck my tongue out at him, not caring
in the slightest that my arms were pinned above my
head and I couldn't move because
he was so close. Without missing a beat his tongue
darted out and brushed over mine, causing me to gasp
softly. He seized the moment and
the next thing I knew, his mouth was slanted over
mine, his tongue gently seeking entrance. I moaned
softly as timed seemed to stop as our
lips rubbed over each other, as our tongues danced,
and a contented smile crept across my face as he
lifted me up into his arms, his mouth
brushing insistantly over the sensitive spots of my
neck.

      I didn't even notice where he was heading, and
shrieked in shock and agitation when he dumped me
directly into the fountain.

      "JARETH!!!" I hollared, splashing as I tried to get
up, not an easy task when you've got streams of
freezing water falling onto your head.

      "You started it," he answered primly, a sly smile
creeping over his features. I tried my best to work up
to a tantrum, but all I could
do was try not to laugh.

      "You are a goober, do you know that?" I managed,
accepting his hand as I pulled myself out of the
fountain's base.

      "I do learn from the best," he replied smoothly,
winking slyly, provoking me to splash at him, catching
him full in the front.
"Very cute," he stammered after he had overcome his
shock. "Well, now that we're even, maybe we should go
inside before we drown each other," he
suggested, and I nodded my full agreement and let him
lead the way into his vacation home.

************************

Part 3
     
      The inside was no less elegant than the outside,
walking a very fine line between simplicity and
splendor. It was a tad amusing to see that even an
age-old Fae like Jareth had finally caved and
populated his
house with conveniences like a television,
entertainment center, fully-equipped kitchen, and
computer. He shrugged when I questioned him on this,
saying something
about keeping up with the times. I did my best not to
gape outright as J gave me the grand tour, emphasis on
the /grand/. His castle at the
Goblin City really did him no justice.

      "So...if you've got all this, why even put up with
your subjects in the labyrinth, or anyone on the lists
for that matter?
Why not live it up, live the good life since you
obviously have it..." I asked, and his face was
actually an statement of surprise.

      "I know I gripe and complain...and kick people....but
I honestly do love my work...I wouldn't trade my
royalty for anything...and
most of the listians I can put up with, or genuinely
like...there are only a few that I truly would like to
run over with the cleaners," he replied, smirking
wistfully at the thought of the freedom to do that
last bit, I'm sure.

      "Damn...you really are generous with us sometimes," I
murmured, not really intending for him to hear, but I
had momentarily forgotten how good of hearing the
goblin king actually had. He turned from where he was
leading me down the hallway, clasped my hand and
smiled softly at me, then turned back to the wall
hangings and
one-of-a-kind paintings that lined the walls. I would
have never tagged Jareth as an art fiend until now,
nor did I realize that
he alone possessed an entire collection of art from
the sunken city of Atlantis, a specific hobby of his.
His explanation? A sizeable challenge to keep him busy
when
he was frustrated. Amazing. There was no throne room
here, no grand entry chambers or hanging
tapestries...but there was very much a
sense of grandeur...a sense of him. It was as if I was
seeing the goblin king for the first time, and not
only did I like what I saw,
I was becoming slightly intimidated. What in blazes
was I /doing/ here, among all this finery, when he
could obviously find the very best?

      "Stop that," he muttered, not even bothering to turn
around.

      "What?" I sighed, and he turned and glared slightly
at me.

      "Questioning yourself...I absolutely hate it when you
do that..."

      "Really?"

      "Yes...it drives me completely up the wall...you have
so much going for yourself and you don't even
realize it, so stop it before I lock you in a closet
or something until you obey me for once," he grumbled,
his
threat only half-serious, though I could tell he was
genuinely concerned. Somehow, I had never thought much
of the habit, and
for the first time I realized how much I did sell
myself short...

      "All right...I'll do my best from now on," I managed,
the words somehow hard to come by. Nodding, he seemed
to accept my answer
and led me to a room at the end of the hall on the
second floor.

      "You'll find more suitable clothes to lounge around
in inside..." he explained, opening the door for me, a
half-grin on
his face and I wasn't exactly sure if I wanted to know
exactly what kind of garment he had set out...last
time I ended up in a fishnet bodysuit
and a metal collar and leash. Not that it hadn't had
its high points, but still... "Nothing like that, I
think you'll like the selection," he
replied at my thought and I nodded silently. "After
you get changed, you can meet me in the den and we'll
figure out what to do then..." he
added, then headed away in the opposite direction,
towards the stairs. Upon entering, I was again left
breathless at the
simple elegance of the budoir, from the breezey sheets
of the bed, to the dark wooden furniture, to the soft
cream carpet at my feet.
Although, I couldn't help but blush slightly when I
walked towards the bed and saw exactly what he had set
out for me...a selection
of soft silken robes and gowns, ranging from
floor-length, sleeveless shifts to short, translucent
nightgowns. Biting my lip, I wondered
exactly which I should clothe myself in...after all, I
knew that inevitably I'd be faced with the decision of
whether I wanted to become
fully involved with Jareth during this week, and it
was better to make up my mind sooner than later.
Chewing the inside of my lip softly,
I scanned the selection again and carefully made my
choices.

      A short time later I descended the stairway and
easily found the den, where Jareth was
already sprawled on a sofa, clicking lazily through
television chanels. I don't know what about that
picture
amused me so much, but I stopped in my tracks, leaned
against the door frame and grinned as I silently
watched the
scene. "Amazing...so you're a real person after all,"
I quipped, grinning as he turned quickly, ready to
make
some smart retort, but judging from the way his
eyebrows shot up and mouth slackened slightly when he
saw me, he
was just a tad surprised by my appearance. I flashed a
cocky grin to cover up just how exposed I actually
felt, and
turned around to give him a better view of the
translucent, sleeveless teal shift that I wore, the
skirt brushing lightly over the tops of my thighs.
Before he could say a word, I flashed a wicked grin
and wrapped the
silver, floor-length silk robe round me, tying it in
place securely before entering the room.

      "Lovely," was all he said, shaking his head in
admiration.

      "Whatever," I snorted, crawling next to him on the
sofa. He flashed
me a Look and I rolled my eyes. "That wasn't
second-guessing myself, that was just
a non-positive reply," I told him, grabbing the remote
from his hand.

      "Oh, really?" he asked, making a face, to which I
simply grinned.

      "Yes, really...so what's on?" I asked, finding
nothing of interest. He answered my
question with his trademark smirk and pointed at the
TV. I blinked when the screen flickered slightly,
and when the static cleared, it revealed one of my
all-time favorite movies, "Rob Roy."
"This isn't going to irritate you?" I asked, raising
an eyebrow.

      "Not really no...and get that thought out of your
head, I'm not putting on a kilt for you,
so forget it," he said sternly before I could even
form the words for the question. Pouting slightly, I
snuggled back
into his arms and settled in for what I considered one
of the most romantic movies of all time.
Somehow, I had a slight feeling that Jareth knew
exactly what I thought of the movie and exactly what
it did to my
hormone level. So, it really didn't surprise me /too/
much when I felt his hand slowly
parting the lower folds of the robe so that his hand
could skim along the inside of my thighs.

      "Jareth!" I yelped, out of breath because of the
wonderfully gratuitous sex scenes in the movie and the
path
that his hand was taking.

      "Hmm?" was all he would say, and I had to close my
eyes to collect myself as the very tip of his
tongue slowly began to trace under my ear, a huge
sensitive spot for me.

      "I'm trying to watch the movie!" I gasped, not really
putting up much of a fight as his other hand
began to stroke at my breast through the fabric of the
robe and shift, his mouth finding where my neck
met shoulder and sucking softly.
     
      "Are you?" he mumbled, a delicate finger tracing
softly over the satin panties I was wearing and I
groaned, the figures on the screen becoming less and
less important by the minute. My breathing became more
and more
shallow as that single finger, slowly, slowly ran back
and forth over my folds, the fabric of the panties
slowly becoming
drenched by my reactions to him.

      "Well NOW I'm not!!" I growled, rolling in his arms
so I could sit in his lap facing
towards him. My eyes narrowed slightly at his gleeful
statement and before he could issue some smart
comeback,
I quickly sealed my mouth over his, kissing him
senseless. He purred low in his throat, like
some great cat, one hand gliding over my back, the
other still diligently at work between my legs.
I groaned into his mouth as he began to rub faster,
then suddenly slowed, circling with amazing
precision, until I was gasping into his mouth, moaning
softly as the ripples of an amazingly sweet orgasm ran
over my skin. I panted, looking at him through wide
eyes, amazed to see nothing but a soft tenderness in
those
cold eyes, tinted by the gleam of mischief. Without a
word he picked me up, and soon we had left the room,
leaving the movie for the evening.


=====