InMemory

Dennis D. Sauers
Resting in Peace

Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household world that it always was,
Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It it the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.

After a while, you learn the subtle difference
and between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't mean security,
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats
With the grace of a woman,
not the grief of a child,
And learn to build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans,
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight
And after a while, you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul,
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure...
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn
and learn...
With every goodbye, you learn.

My father's death was the one "goodbye" that I learned the most from. His death taught me how to live. He was only 52 when he passed away. They say that a virus had attacked and killed 95% of his heart. When his heart problems first started, the doctor's gave my father only six months to live. He managed to go on for six years with only 5% of his heart to work with. When someone mentions "having heart"....this man certainly did. My father worked very hard as a mechanic and running our family business. It was when he became ill that he realized what he was missing in life...family. It takes tragedy for most people to realize what is really important in life. I honestly believe that what he found is what kept him alive those six years.

My father had over 500 people show up to pay their respects at his funeral. The streets were clogged with cars everywhere. I heard someone attending a viewing in the next room say...."who is Dennis Sauers?" and another replied, "If you only knew...." I never realized how many people knew and respected my father. He owned a shop on Erie's eastside, basically, in the ghetto.
He was an honest man, fair businessman, and very charitable to those that needed his help.

We received a note in the mail containing $20.00 after my father's death. Several years ago, during the winter, her car had broken down with a flat tire. It was cold and snowing, cars were passing by, however, no one would stop to help her. A man with a truck appeared, got out, replaced her tire with a spare she had. She offered to pay him, however, he took nothing. He just wanted to help. She never knew his name until his picture appeared in the obituary section of the newspaper. This woman remembered my father's face for over three years. My father had barely enough strength to walk a flight of stairs, yet, he mustered up the energy to replace this woman's tire.

I shed tears for my father regularly. I'm selfish and I miss him very much. I wish he were still here. I'm just grateful that I still hear stories about him. It keeps him alive in my heart. My favorite memory is my father's smile. It is etched in my mind and I visit with him when I need the strength to go on in my own life. I love you Dad.......I hope you have finally found peace.

The last picture of my father