underpalmer

HEIGHT-------------------------------------------7FT 4"

WEIGHT------------------------------------------500 POUNDS

HOME TOWN-------------------------------------DEATH VALLEY

BIOGRAPHY--------------------------------------WELL WHERE DO WE START? YOU TELL ME CAUSE I DONT HAVE A CLUE. THE EARLY YEARS OF THE UNDERPALMER ARE SOMEWHAT OF A MYSTERY. I SUPPOSE HE GOT ALONG LIKE ANY OTHER 6FT TALL EIGHT YEAR OLD. THE UNDERPALMER RECEIVED HIS WRESTLING CALL AT THE AGE OF 12 WHEN AT A SLEEPOVER, THE UNSUSPECTING THOMPO TORNADO RECEIVED A BEATING FROM PALMER AFTER THE TORNADO MISTAKENLY WHIPPED PALMERS DADS ASS WITH A BELT. ASK ANYONE THIS IS THE FUNNIEST STORY EVER TOLD.

PALMER DISTURBED BY THE EVER PRESENT IMAGE OF THE TORNADO STANDING, WITH BELT IN HAND, OVER PALMERS VERY OWN FATHER TOOK VENGENCE IN THE WRESTLING BUSINESS. HOWEVER PALMER STARTED OFF AS RING CREW/ CAMERA GUY. THIS PROVED UNSUCESSFUL AS PALMER SHOWED HIS INABILITY TO ACTUALLY FILM AN EVENT. UCW WERE VICTIMS OF THIS TOO AS UNDERPALMER "UNKNOWINGLY" RUINED THE VERY 1ST WRESTLEFEST. PALMER WENT ON TO BECOME AN ANNOUNCER. AGAIN THIS WAS A LOST CAUSE AS THE UNWANTED CALLS OF "NO, NOOO, NOOOOOOOOOO" SCARED AUDIENCES AWAY.

PALMER WAS DISCOVERED BY TOM MCIVOR + QUICKLY CLIMBED HIS WAY TO THE TOP UNDER THE NAME THE UNDERPALMER. THE DEAD MAN WAS ONE HELL OF AN ASSKICKER. PALMER WAS RECOGNISED AS THE FACE OF WFS + BECAME VERY, VERY RICH. HE SPENT A LOT OF MONEY ON TRACKSUIT BOTTOMS BUT AS HE WAS SO TALL HE COULD NOT FIND ANY THAT FITTED HIM. IT IS WIDLY KNOWN THAT IT WAS IN FACT PALMER THAT UNKNOWING INVENTED THE BERMUDA SHORTS, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

PALMER CONTINUED HIS DESTRUCTION INTO UCW HISTORY BUT COMMITMENTS HAS LIMITED HIS APPEARANCES THESE DAYS. THE UNDERPALMER HAS MODELLING DUTIES AND AS CAPTAIN OF THE NATO TRAMPOLINING SQUAD HE IS RARELY IN THE PROVENCE. PALMER SPOKE ON THIS. "WELL BASICALLY WE WANT TO PROMOTE WORLD PEACE IN THE FORM OF TRAMPOLINING. I AM AN ACOMPLISHED TRAMPOLINER AND I THOUGHT I COULD HELP WORLD PEACE WITH MY TALENTS. DAMN IT MAN ITS MY DUTY" MICHAEL PARKINSON WHEN INTERVIEWING THE UNDERPALMER SUMED HIM UP WITH THESE WORDS, "THIS GUY IS A HERO, SOMEONE TO LOOK UP TO, SOMEONE TO ADMIRE SOMEONE TO LOVE. HOWEVER HE IS NOT THE SMARTEST PEANUT IN THE TURD IS HE?"

PALMER AFTER DOING ALL THERE WAS TO DO WITH THE UNDERPALMER CHARACTER INVENTED THE PERSONA OF MC UNDERPALMER, WHICH THE CROWDS IMMEDIATELY TOOK TO. IT WAS INGENIUS. A DEADMAN DJ. HE AND HIS BEST BUD "SCRATCH MASTER P" TOOK THE DJ'ING WORLD BY STORM SELLING OUT THE GROOMSPORT HOUSE FOR 5 UNDER 18 DISCOS IN A ROW.

PALMER WHO IS REPORTED TO BE RETURNING IS MORE THAT WELCOME TO WRESTLE IN UCW. TO BE HONEST, AND I MEAN NO DISRESPECT TO THE OTHER GUYS BUT, THINGS ARE NOT THE SAME WHEN THE UNDERPALMER IS NOT THERE. AND IF I COULD SUM THE UNDERPALMER UP IN ONE WORD WELL THATS EASY ISNT IT, IT WOULD BE "LEGEND"

LONG LIVE THE UNDERPALMER