Interview with Nutek Dyrrbin
As the healers clean up the carnage from the last battle, Ultrann stands and raises his arms. "While we wait for the next battle, I thought you might like to hear a little about some of our newest gladiators. Through magical illusion, we will show an interview by our own Balen Greybeard, the dwarven bard and my good friend!"
A shimmering image appears in the middle of the arena. Larger than life, the well-groomed but scarred visage of Balen addresses the wizard. "Thank you, Ultrann. I'm sure the folks won't be disappointed with the conversation we have planned for today." The dwarven bard's image is split as a dozen copies of his illusionary form drift out and above the different sections of the audience. He smiles to the crowd, "Today, we will hear from the least likely of arena combatants. Standing at two-and-a-half feet tall, he is one of the smallest creatures to ever enter a professional gladiator ring. However, despite his small stature, he shocked us all when he handily defeated a well-trained opponent in his first fight. I give you the goblin, Nutek Dyrrbin!"
The green-skinned, diminutive creature appears beside Balen. Although the dwarf towers over him, Nutek does not look intimidated. He reveals his cracked, yellow teeth as he smiles ominously at the audience. "Nutek glad to be here. Nutek now have chance to explain greatness."
Balen responds, "Quite. First of all, I'm sure that everyone here wants to know where you hail from? What clan do you represent? Where did you learn magic?"
Nutek's smile turns into a frown and he waves off the question. "Nutek no talk about past. Only talk about present and future. Only talk about victory and triumph when Nutek defeats all."
"Fine then, no questions about your past. But maybe you can tell us a little more about why you're here. Why fight in the arena?"
Nutek's expression grows serious. "Nutek see how big folk treat goblins. Big folk think we are weak. They think we are small. They think we no better than horse droppings. Nutek here to prove big folk wrong. We not strong, but clever. We not big, but many. When Nutek champion of arena, big folk not treat goblins like dogs."
"Interesting. So you are here to fight for goblin-kind? To gain respect for your race?"
Nutek nods. "Yes. Money good, too. And free healing."
Balen asks, "Assuming that you do defeat all of the odds and become champion of the arena, what next?"
The goblin answers, "Nutek open school for goblins. Nutek teach spells to goblins. With many wizards, goblins not get picked on by orcs and trolls. With magic, goblins live wherever they want, not just smelly caves."
"Noble goal. But surely it will be a difficult one?"
The goblin nods, "Yes, long road. But Nutek smart. Others be smart too."
"So, Nutek, now that you've been at the arena, what do you think of your competitors?"
"Nutek not think much of them. Soon, all be dead at Nutek's feet."
Balen looks incredulous. "You don't think any of them will be a challenge?"
Nutek answers, "No."
"Well then, aside from yourself, who would you say is the strongest fighter here?"
Nutek considers the question. "Grolsch big man. Good fighter. Will die horribly at Nutek's hands, but strong warrior. Nutek think Kulgarr clever fighter. Kulgarr honorable opponent. Nutek will kill Kulgarr quickly, so Kulgarr not suffer."
The dwarven bard asks, "Really?"
Nutek doubles over with laughter. "No. Nutek make joke. Kulgarr will suffer like all the others."
Balen clears his throat, "Some of our local experts feel that your first victory was a fluke. If your spell hadn't have worked, they claim you would have been beaten into a pulp by Sister Love. In fact, they claim that your use of disabling magic was cheap, and defeated the purpose of honorable arena combat. How do you respond to this?"
Nutek frowns as he answers, "Nutek say 'tough troll-claws'. Nutek no complain when opponent uses sword or fist. Others should not complain when Nutek use magic. If others not like magic, they should go home."
"What about your next opponent, Kelia Nimblefingers? How do you feel about facing off against another spellcaster?"
"Nutek not worried about halfling. Big folk say halflings brave. They say halflings quick. They say halflings clever. But Kelia uses magic to hide in every fight. Nutek brave, not hide. Goblins quicker than halflings. And Nutek undefeated. So we see who really clever. Nutek thinks halflings only good for running and hiding, not fighting."
Balen turns away from the goblin, and back to the crowd. "Big words from a not so big opponent. We'll see next session if he has the skill to back them up."