|
DRCs for El Domingo, September 16, 2001
You freaks who send in DRCs making fun of what happened the other day deserve to have your genitals cut off and fed to you.
It's been a long week...
I hope everyone is feeling o.k.... May these DRCs be a hint of the goodness to come (unless you think they suck, in which case, the OPPOSITE of what is to come).
little Timmy: Mommy, how come there are no DRC's Today, I'm getting really escared.
Mommy: I'm sorry timmy, there's nothing I can do, those gosh darn nintendorks
are getting lazy.
Timmy: Boo Hoo, I'm too sad mastrubate now.
Mommy: try harder timmy I'm sure you can do it.
Timmy: **Rubs Crotch Furiously** Nope mommy I just can't.
Mommy: Curse those nintendorks, curse them to hell! -What a shame
Survivor: What a shame indeed. Especially since there are DRCs today, and they're early to boot. Looks like Little Timmy has e.d..
Chris: Mommy, what's a "mastrubate"?
Got porn? -National Porn Foundation
Survivor: No.
Got around to reading the 3rd vibe. We need to get a party of lesbians over at Jai's house, he's earned it. -Omnilink
Survivor: So what your saying is that you don't like Jai. Cause if someone sent a bunch of hot chicks over to my house to have sex, and they wouldn't let me in on it, I'd be pissed.
Ahaha... I doubt anyone recognised that knife-scar reference. It's from a list of actual subtitles from japanese films. And the helpful bastard that I am, I have the whole list.
Actual English subtitles used in Japanese films:
1. I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way.
2. Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.
3. Gun wounds again?
4. Same old rules: no eyes, no groin.
5. A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries.
6. Damn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken!
7. Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants.
8. Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?
9. Quiet or I'll blow your throat up.
10. You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken.
11. I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out!
12. You daring lousy guy.
13. Beat him out of recognizable shape!
14. I have been scared shitless too much lately.
15. I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair!
16. Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected.
17. The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?
18. How can you use my intestines as a gift?
19. This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am sure you
will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on the dessert
flour for your aunts to eat.
20. Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can
now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough extermination.
21. Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up together
and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate feets on some ass of
the giant lizard person.
Ah, the fantasticatude of it. -The Chimp
Survivor: I like raisins.
For anyone still worried that Luigi's Mansion will be a repetitive sack of crap, here's the review from Famitsu.
------------
Luigi's Mansion:
Famitsu score: 9 9 8 8 - 34/40 (gold)
The review crew were all in agreement that the control method was tricky to get
to grips with, but after a short time, found themselves enjoying dual analogue
method, saying the better you got, the more interesting the game became. The
structure of the game was said to be well thought out, with the new game play
elements or 'tricks', being of a high standard, and well balanced throughout.
Technically, the visuals (animation and ghosts in particular) were said to be
outstanding, lending to the overall atmosphere. One reviewer said that there is
almost nothing to complain about; indeed the only real criticism came from one
who thought Luigi's (walking) pace to be somewhat slow.
Thoughts so far:
xample of this is the first 'boss', who is the giant ghost of a baby who tries
to dispatch you with floating wooden rocking horses, in a scene, which owes more
to David Lynch than Nintendo. As I said, this isn't a review, so I'll leave it
there for now. All I can say is, for those who have a GameCube arriving next
week; you have a treat in store..."
------------
Sounds pretty damn good to me. -The Chimp
Survivor: Astonishing! Why did the baby fall off the rocking horse?
Because I shot it! I didn't actually shoot a baby, and you shouldn't either.
Speaking of RPS...whatever happened to the RPS championship matches over in the Studio? Not that I've ever participated in or even seen one...or really even cared about it, but...I've not heard mention of them in a while.
Will this controversy over what the new RPS should be like revive RPS in the
Studio (if it even went away)? Tune in and find out -Cap'n Smite
Survivor: I'd tune in if I knew how to use mIRC, but I don't. Oh, well...
If Jai's allowed to go off on tangents about RPS, I should be allowed to rant about Johnny Cash. He's like, really cool. Yeah. Ring of Fire.
The Devil Went Down to Georgia is like the coolest song ever, by the way. All
they need to play on oldies stations is that and Classical Gas, with a generous
sprinkling of Doo Wa Diddy and the Beegees in between. Heck, that should be it's
own station, throw in Johnny Cash and I'm set for life. -Amazing CAP
Survivor: First of all, we'll tell you what you are and are not allowed to do. Secondly, you could probably make an internet radio station like that, NDORK style. But Lak's will be better than yours.
Survivor: Bye.
Time to pretend!
Excuse me while I run around the room and make airplane noises.
|
|