"A Lost Love" (standing here)

@Uootem

I stand here watching you,
        as you turn your back on "us'
        and all that we had and walk away.
All that I can think,
        all that I can promise to myself is that
                          I will find you again someday in a different way.

You had to leave, I know you felt that,
        but your leaving has left me
            standing here alone, watching you go,
wondering will I ever see you again,
        wondering could you ever love me anew
            and how to find you is all I want to know.

You did not necessarily mean for this to happen,
        but you did leave me here with
            hurt and pain to feel.
I want to scream with all my voice
        that when we first met,
            your eventual leaving wasn't part of the deal.

I know that leaving could be hard,
        it was not in your plans until it happened
            and perhaps it hurt you a little, too.
But every time I try to think,
        to make sense of what you had to do
            my mind it hurts, and my heart for relief turns to you.

I think back on that dreadful summer day,
        the day that you just up and left so sudden
            and I catch myself wondering why and how.
Could I have ever let you leave me,
        and all that had become what I loved about "us"
          for I know in my heart that I could never do that now.
When you left me alone to find my own life,
        a part of me went with you that day,
            you see you took with you my heart.
And every time I think of you,
        even after so much time as passed
            the emptiness it seems to tear me apart.

I cannot wait for someday to come,
        for I pray to the gods of love that it will come soon,
            that day when I can again finally see you.
And find the courage and the words,
        to tell you how much I have fostered the memory of our love
            and how very much I miss what I once shared with you.

In those younger days of our love
        you were always there for me,
            no matter what the emotional cost.
When I ran scared to others pretending "we" did not matter
        you would then let me return, and find my way back
            For this I promise to repay to you everything we lost.

I hope in my heart and in my soul
        I will once again find you,
            and your love will find me... someday, somehow,
I need to tell you about my feelings,
        these emotions that plague me so,
            I need you to know right now.

If only you could hear of the unending love
        of the yearning and desire
            that I continue to feel for you,
perhaps you would understand,
        and perhaps remember
            and feel those feelings too.