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12/19/03
Gonna go home today!!! Rejoice, Rejoice!!! I'm gonna leave behind stony brook to be home again... That's so nice...
Might even be heading up to see relatives too if no plans change. Bus traveling and then going to see people I hadn't seen in quite a long, long time...
20 minutes till my next final so ta-ta!
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12/16/03
Will the pain never end?? I have four finals today. I took two already and am waiting for the time to go to the next one. And this is the dreaded Modern Physics one. u know, the chances of me getting a super duper grade on this test is slim and I don't like it too grandly. My final grade won't look at that pretty on my grade report... and I should be making the best of my time with last minute studying... but come on... when has that ever helped me at all?? The other two tests that I took were ok la... I knew most of the stuff since it was graded through writing, you never know what I can get off for. The thing is I'm not exactly well prepared for these tests... I slacked a whole lot throughout the semester and now look where I got myself... Am I that worried about my gpa? heheh... sorta. But it's more the fact that I didn't really try to do well this term that gets to me... I hereby swear that either I pick up my act or just try to take lesser work loads next term... that way I can enjoy life outside of my dorm room more and not stay in there always hurrying to either do hw or travel via the internet.
Three more days of actual school... three more nights here... and four more finals to go... I can't wait to get home... and the other stupid thing going on right now is that my dorm phone doesn't work, no dial tone at all... so I can't even chat with the family at all... The good news is that at least I'm not sick... ^_^ today while taking my classical mythology class, I sat in front of a girl who kept on trying to clear her throat and was plainly sick.... although I feel bad for her... I was also a bit skeptical that someone sick was right behind me... hehhehe... but me strong and i have good white blood cells. Plus I know I gotta get sleep and that I cannot go through two days without a total of 10 hours of sleep at least, meaning I know my limits and have refrained from going over them this semester at least.
Is college hard then? Nah... if you listen in class, speak with the profs and TAs when you have a question or try to get help when you need it, then there ain't no problem at all.. My problem is I don't really do any of those... sigh...
15 minutes and counting... I think I should just head up there and try to mingle among the crowd. That will make me somewhat more like a people's person I guess...
If u r a friend, u would wish me luck... but if ur an enemy... save the sympathy... I wanna just get this exciting day over with and done with...
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12/10/03
Today didn't go too well. I actually slipped and fell on my bum on the wet stairs. I'm still in pain, and I think I need to use some of those chinese rubbing oils to get rid of the pain. Sigh... of all the retarded places that I fell from, I fell on the stairs. I didn't even suspect I can fall from water on the stairs. I learned my lesson and I will be extra cautious now when I wear these stupid boots and also walk over something remotely slippery looking.
Also found out today that I didn't get the winter intermission internship, but that apparently, my roommate did. sigh... the reason I wasn't able to get a piece of the dough was cause I was in the wrong major... I guess I should try applying to the right internships next time. I could tell that programming was gonna be a big part of that internship, and I have no idea how to do that... sigh... and I was hoping to do something pretty useful during the break... I guess I'll just have to sit at home and watch anime... which ain't that bad... just not that grand either.
In half an hour, gonna take my lab final.. I didn't really study... don't much feel like it either because truly, I have no idea what phyiscs concept is behind the labs. As I sat reading the feedback my ta put on the labs, almost 0.5 to 1 point was taken off outta 10 points from the "Physics behind the experiment" section. I'm hoping to do a little bsing to get pass the exam...
Finals... I haven't even looked over any of the class materials yet, which is so retarded of me... I will be regreting it soon... like tomorrow... but one good thing about this is that I can look at that week when I'm gray and old and know I have no existent life at all.. I swear i will not attempt another overloading on credits unless I know for certain there ain't no final for that 3-credit course, otherwise... it's bye-bye, my gpa.
I need money!! not just cash either.... I want to get scholarships and even paid internships... maybe working will be good too. I want to make some $$ and not have to ask my mommy for money all the time.
It's the last week of classes this week and I am not even really exhilirated... I'm numb from lack of sleep, not necessary from doing home work either...
Been playing games on yahoo, like pool... and its fun.. in a stupid sorta way since there's really like no challenge in the thing. Just funny to play with family though cause at least you can comment more comfortably with your opponent than if the guy was a stranger... I actually got booted from tables several time. And another guy actually left the table and thereby forfeit the game because I played so damn slow... heh-heh... I think it's cause the idea is too new...
What am I missing in life right now? Hmmm... has got to be some sort of fun stuff. But hey, I shouldn't even be online right now... I really am trying to not do well in school... I don't love any of the courses I'm taking enough to actually start learning the material... i'm just lucky if I remember half of the stuff that the profs lectured somewhere along the line.
I miss getting to go to sleep for a duration of 8 hours... nowadays I only sleep 6 at most and according to my mom, since I don't eat breakfast... that's why i nod off during lectures. Sad... but y bother now anymore??
Okay, that's really it... I need to start getting panicky over the fact that I have an hour test in only 15 minutes. Wish me luck for today and everyday, and I will in turn bless you, kind, generous person, with all your health... if I had the power to do so, that is. Anyway, enough is enough, I'm going to officially stop and take a last look at this stagnant page and try to see why geocities didn't boot it yet... cause I always check up on it to see if people will be so kind to sign my guestbook? I mean, I don't care if you already signed it or have nothing to say... just do so, so I know people wanna see me update the thing... otherwise, I'll feel so stupid updating something no one pays any attention to...okiee... there I go taking pity on myself and talking to myself too... sigh...
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12/8/03
There's so much unshoveled snow on campus and the paths are dangerous because there ice is accumulating. Already I have almost slipped three times and have witnessed at least one fall, two recoveries, and also one skipping colleague who I heard from behind fell. Sigh... This is like trying to manuever my way on the road of life. Not good then.
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12/6/03
It's Saturday evening and its still snowing outside. I dont want to be a pooper, but I'm itching to do something creative and not related to schoolwork... chances are that it'll be tough luck...
So, MY MOMENT OF REFLECTION:
I was clicking through all my webpages, not all of them, just to the main page and I'm amazed that I started so much of them and never updated or finished them afterwards... did my initial motivation to make webpages dwindle? Of course... there's so much more advance stuff out there to make these pages with including the element of Javascript and also some programming language. I don't have that and I'm not exactly willing to go and learn them, either...
So, as long as all the free webpage servers are still going, I'll, of course keep up the pages for public view... but chances are that no one wants to come to some stupid page...
Guestbook.. so I don't sign them when I go to them... but it encourages the page master to go ahead and do something more productive... and motivates them too... they dont come, I dont feel like updating at all. ^_^ and if there's nothing new here, they won't bother coming... oh, damn, this ain't good... I think I just gotta add to this knowledge...
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12/4/03
Chances are I won't be doing anything with this site anyways... Too much stuff I need to do for school that I didn't do yet... I think I sorta lost my motivation to update the site when no one bothers to come... I feel so sad when that happens... heheh... but I dont bother advertising a lot either... so, heh. Anyway, made a quick $20 bucks today for an hour's worth of my time... quite good in my opinion.. I participated in a focus group for Campus Residences that just wants to take down our general opinions on their services. ^_^ I'm happy that I got to voice some opinions and then earn a few bucks for my empty pocket. But anyway, if anyone is looking, no new updates anytime till breaks... which should be the case usually anyway...
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11/17/03
Updated a bit by adding a links page on. Not very ambitious I know, but ehh.. getting a bit lazy in the brain... Really it's still Sunday since I'm not asleep yet, but let's not think too much bout that. I feel real guilty that I didn't catch up on my readings once again... getting to laid back on that... what with midterms next week too...
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11/15/03
Hallo. Guess I neglected to keep my promise to write more here. heheh... too lazy to sign into geocities. Anyway, what's new? My second round of midterms before Thanksgiving is starting next week. Gee, I can't wait. This means I won't be able to do anything more really on this site either. Not that I have.
NARUTO!!!!! I am in a major Naruto frenzy craze... That anime is the best!!! But I haven't watched more than like 8 episodes and its still ongoing and being translated. It's about a world where aspiring to be ninjas is normal. OMG... I recommended this anime to anyone who can get their hands on it. So far I have been hooked on the manga portion which runs a bit further than the anime. So much humor, and emotions are entertwined into this very good very addicting anime!!! I swear I will put up a page on this anime ASAP.
heheh... so where am I at the moment? In the sinc site observing Project Options' first session ever. Since I had no training... I'm limited in the interactions with the girls and I can't really basically help them even. Sad... But its interesting and stimulating to see these young girls so energetic so early in the morning. I wished I had this opportunity back when I was a kid too. But hey, better now than never. Anyway, I'm basically watching to get an idea of how to instruct. But now that they're on individual computers researching, I can't do anything with them.... so here I am in the back.
That's it for now! I'll write again when I got more to say. ^_^
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10/30/03
My CLS Prof cancelled class yet again. But with no advanced notice so that I was hurrying to get to class and when i reach the openned door, and i glanced in to see no one inside... then i saw the typed sheet of paper, "Typed" meaning there was time to plan, on the wall and it said the class is cancelled. I was like huh? and came here to surf the net for an hour and half before the next class starts. I'm soooo sleepy... dont think i can survive the next class thru... which wouldn't mean anything different since I seldom get thru all three classes on Tue, and Thurs cycle. Unlucky person that I am.... I'm gonna have the finals for these three classes all on the same day. OMG... i'm still not over the shock... and chances are my BUS final is on the same date too.. this sucks like nothing else in the world can.
So what else to talk about besides school? Nothing... I'm too caught up in trying, emphasis on trying, to catch up on all the reading and stuff that I havent even bother going to the club alley... not that there is much to do there. But y is it that i'm behind? Well good question, cause I fool around with the computer too much... once I get on, I can't immediately get off and I waste at least, 5 hours a day on it. That's 5 hours that could have been used to do hw... and tonight... oh jeez that Thursday marathon of hw completion is gonna start and probably won't end... I hate Fridays... so much stuff is due... but most of all I'm starting to dislike myself immensely. No offense, self, but come on, ur life is completely hollow and sucky... school and academics aren't everything, ya kno...
So brings me back to this page. What to do to u? I neglect it for so long... that's its sooo, sooo sad.. Come on and try to get along with me. Since there isn't any big advertising of the site... its kinda sad that I mind sao much that no one is coming. I mean if they do, they might wanna leave a message in my guestbook... sigh... whatever.."What ever will be, will be... the future's not for us to see... Que Sera, Sera, what will be, will be..."
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10/28/03
Whoa... haven't been uptodate here in at least 20 days.... awww... dont i feel a little guilty? Nah... I'm too irresponsible to feel that anyway. So... what's new on the horizon... gonna start a review on Naruto. heheh... impending that i got the time to do so and then go back and convert the RK that I didn't bother finishing up either. Also, the Jin-Roh too, now that I think bout it.... sheesh does anyone even bother reading them? cause it'll sure save me some time to know that now... heheh... anway school is so-so. too much reading and not enough comprehension going on. Which is very bad...
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10/8/03
Ever get the feeling that it's weird to not be sure of one's own existence? I felt like today was a bit of a drag... and I'm not at the end of it either. I have a test coming up that I didn't really "cram" for because I wasn't in the mood. I have about three hours to do that later though... which should teach u something as well. Right now in a sinc site supposedly to study... but looks like not..
I'm wasting away, wallowing in procrastination... i have no motivation to work hard this semester... and I have a problem with staying awake in class... I think I can correct that by just getting more sleep. Otherwise... not much to look into my dark, dim future.
Saw one of my old, old classmates from way back in seth low and even in high school. What amazes me is that we were never really friends at all. Just someone I knew from school, and who happened to came to the same college as me. Anyway, needless to day, the list of topics was slim to nil to talk about. Also, cause she had to study too.. which really drags down the conversational mood. It was physics too... sorta simple stuff on forces... maybe I should have put my 2 cents in... but hey, I tend to confuse more than help most of the time.
I dled a lot nice stuff off the internet. I doubt it will be legal... but no one's sued so far so I'm good. Really wished I had took it easy this semester... maybe I should just give up on trying to get a perfecto 4.0 cause let's face it, I haven't been successful so far. But what I fail to do, is that I can't catch up with my readings... especially for my classical mythology class... too much of those crap from a course packet to dig through and I haven't really the time to look at it... Plus once I get back to my dorm, I turn on the compute and just surf the net. Looking for stuff to get or just checking stuff out. Life is like that... a box of very moldy chocolates that no one wants to eat even if they are starving...
I still haven't looked over NGE! That frustrates me to hell... I think over the weekend.. if i can plan stuff better and do a bit of time management too.
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9/28/03
So... I changed the look of this page around... this single page that most people will balk and run from since there are so much words here... But, hey I felt that I feel a bit more at ease writing here than I sometimes do in xanga... cause I get the feeling that people out to criticize me all the way to san antique... whereever that is...
So, went home this weekend. Stayed in and watched like 10 episodes of "All-in" and still there is more till the end. The story is pretty damn slow.. but when the two main characters come one, i'm captivated once again... by their pain and stupid morals... heheh.. u got to watch it to understand what i mean...
Places changed on Bay Parkway a lot. New structures have been built and new restuarants got established. Even the big door of the apartment building has been upgraded to something cool... i fell like I journeyed a thousand years to come back home some place totally unfamilar to me. My mom moved a lot of the furniture around... and my bed is totally without pillowcase and bedsheet... sigh... and there seems to be a whole lot less crap floating around the chairs and stuff. My home has changed... but its nice to go back once in a while to keep adrift the changes. Got more mangas! Mad cheap @ a buck each. The story isn't grand, but its sorta cute.
Anyway, back to more hw and I'm gonna go and update that xanga... cause more people tend to check that than this site... sigh... I need some real good advertising... how, though?
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9/26/03
Well, another very stupid week passed. I stayed up till like 5:00 am yesterday to finish up my damn hws... Modern Physics and Dynamics are really stupid. I can't think of a better way to say it. My mind is surprisingly clear considering I only got like 4 hours of sleep... coca-cola, u have ur most loyal fan right here. If it isn't for coke and its sweet syrupy and caffine filled sweetness, I will be the dead corpse I am within three days. But, u see, it lags that mechanism behind so I can look pretty healthy for my mommy to see me... YEA! I'm going home yet again. Even though it'll be long and tedious with the switching of trains and the subway later. But I get to watch "all in" if I can finish it... which chances are quite good.
I might direly regret this decision to go home by the time sunday comes and I get swamped with all the homeworks yet again. Weekends are suppose to facilitate the whole hw process by giving us more spare time... but not for me... i spend that precious time on the net... I am totally addicted to this thing... I will itch and feel very uncomfortable if I can't turn on a computer and get on the net... this is just way too sad...
Anyway, sorry, UsagiSakura... I have once again started the vicious cycle of neglence... I will most likely not even update this site until even a large chunk of time is available... but I appreciate it if people will keep on coming just to admire the beautiful creation that I created.... ^_^
Well... gonna take the LIRR in like 10 minutes, so bye-bye... I'll try to at least right entries here for my own entertainment purposes so I don't totally stop visiting this site too...
HAVE A NICE WEEKEND! ^_^
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9/16/03
The joy of being able to skip one class. My Classical Mythology class was mysteriously cancelled today and I had a whole hr and a hlaf to spend elsewhere... which was nowhere. I only found this out when I reached the classroom door and I was rushing to get there too... anyway, I strolled around the campus and didn't really pay much attention to anything... maybe to make sure not to step on duck do, but that's basically it. So.. off to another class again now...
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9/13/03
It's the weekend and I'm not gonna be able to enjoy it, am I?? Shame, shame... Gonna rewatch some NGE episodes later so I'll probably think of something clever to write there...
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8/30/03
I washed my slate anew, and I have no more rants of the previous months... this way I can start anew with anything I write about.
My page is sloppily put together with a bit more attention looked at the written parts than any of the others...
Basically I didn't even finish my reviews... cause I lost interest halfway through... ahhh, whatever. I'll just fix it while school is in session, it'll be more fun, anyway...
So I didn't write any rants for quite a bit... one rant to add to the whole list: What's with the heat? Too damn uncomfortable nowadays...
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