From: Takako Nagumo
Date: Thu, 10 Apr 1997 22:20:04 -0400
Subject: USS CHESAPEAKE: Clearing Up the Mess
SD 90410.0631
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Officer's Mess
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MD 4.1200
Anne had just stepped into the Officer's Mess for a quick lunch. She
was preparing to leave, rather disappointed with the selections, when
she saw Commander Brennan sitting at a table, PADDs in front of him.
Anne hesitated a moment, then decided to go speak with the XO. She
*had* behaved rather oddly that morning, and she *did* shove him
on the floor.
"Excuse me, sir..." she said, approaching Commander Brennan's table, "I
wanted to explain my earlier behavior on the bridge... and to apologize
for my conduct."
He looked up. "Ah... Lieutenant." He smiled. "No apologies
necessary.
You perhaps had something on your mind."
He gestured to the seat across from him. "Would you like to join me?
Or
did you have other plans?"
"Thank you, sir... I don't have any plans." She sat down across from
him.
"Sir... " She paused, then looked at the floor. She looked back up at
him
with renewed resolve. "It's just... what happened this morning made me
realize that my experiences on my previous post left more scars than I'd
realized... but I'm willing to work on it, sir... and I can assure you
that
nothing like that will happen again."
His hands stopped fiddling with the lightpen. "Scars?"
Anne nodded, taking a deep breath.
"It... it was the Ship's Counselor, sir... it wasn't... pleasant."
She wondered if she should elaborate.
"I see." He looked down at his plate, then the PADDwork spread out
around it on his side of the table. He carefully pushed it all aside,
placed his clasped hands in front of him on the table, then looked at
her.
"If there's anything I can do, please ask. I'm here to help you, and
I'd like to think that I can in some way."
"I don't know, sir... it's..." Anne blushed for the second time
that day. "Well." She paused... but Myron had told her to *tell*
people, to let them know *why* she was acting the way she was.
"I just... feel as though everyone is questioning my ability, and
it's rather... upsetting."
He nodded. "Yes, that would be upsetting.... Now, I don't mean to
pry -- you don't have to answer this question if you prefer,
but what kind of behaviors have you observed that made you feel that
way?"
Anne's lips trembled a bit.
"Well... I guess it's fact-based, after all..." she paused. "I mean,
with the unannounced drill..." She drifted off, then focused back.
"The Counselor mentioned that there have been complaints from my
staff... my own staff can't seem to function... I... I'm sorry, sir."
Anne put her head in her hands. "She accused me of abandoning ship,
sir... and it's been preying on my mind since. I think she may be
right."
"Abandoning ship?" He frowned. "I don't quite understand."
She looked up. She squared her shoulders.
"She took exception to my method of leaving the BELLEROPHON, sir,"
she said, her voice resolute.
Brennan tried to remember what exactly was in Murray's jacket.
"And, from your perspective, how did you leave the BELLEROPHON?"
"That's what I don't know, sir," said Anne quietly. She chewed
her lip. "From my standpoint... there were good enough reasons to
leave..." She paused. "I mean, I wasn't about to advance on the
ship no matter what I did, I needed a new environment..."
The Commander nodded for her to go on.
"And now... I'm just not sure. I think, perhaps, I really was only
trying to run away."
"Run away from what, if I may ask?"
"From... the Counselor, sir." Anne looked just a bit uneasy. "He..." she
paused, swallowing. "He... was not very helpful," she concluded, unable
to say what she had meant to say.
A small trace of a smile appeared on his lips. "That has been my
experience as well, I must say."
Anne wondered if the XO knew *what* her experience had been.
"I suppose it may not be all that uncommon, sir," she said, carefully
non-committal, blushing again.
"Not everyone can confide in a Ship's Counsellor...
nothing against Counsellors, mind you, I think they have an important
role on a ship, but... some things... I'd feel better if a coworker
did not know."
Anne nodded.
"Yes, sir." She felt a lot better; Commander Brennan might understand,
after all. "He... insisted on knowing everything, sir, and... well..."
"And you did not appreciate that."
She nodded. "And... there was something else..." Her eyes
were downcast, but she knew that she'd never admit anything to a
Counselor, of all people... and Myron had told her that she had to let
somebody know... so that what happened this morning wouldn't happen
again. "He... got physical, sir." She leaned her elbows on the table,
just barely keeping her head from falling onto her hands. She had
never felt so embarrassed in her life.
Brennan stopped breathing for a moment. No wonder....
He indicated the chair next to her. "May I?"
Anne nodded silently, watching him carefully.
He moved to sit beside her, careful not to indicate any
intention of touching her. "Would you like to go somewhere private?
This is not the most... conducive place for a conversation like this."
"Yes, sir... if it's not inconvenient..." She looked at his stack of
PADDs lying on the table.
"No. Not at all." He quickly gathered his PADDs.
"Would my office be acceptable? Or would you prefer yours?"
"Your office is most acceptable, sir..." She looked at the XO
rather timidly. "I'm sorry, sir... I don't mean to impose on your
time."
He smiled, shaking his head. "It's not an imposition." He stood.
"Shall we, then?"
Anne nodded and stood also.
They quietly left the Mess and headed toward Brennan's office.
* * * * *
As the doors to his office opened, he gestured for her to precede him.
He followed her in, and as she came to a stop in front of his desk,
he walked around it, letting the PADDs clatter a bit on his desk.
"Please," he said, "sit down. May I get you something to drink?"
"Hot chocolate, please?" she asked. "Thank you."
Brennan nodded and walked over to the replicator. "One hot
chocolate, one hot Pekoe-Orange Pekoe tea."
One moment, and the two mugs appeared. He took them out
carefully and, handing the chocolate to her, sat down in his
chair and took a sip of his tea.
"So... Lieutenant." He put his mug down on the desk.
"You were saying that there was some severe... unpleasantness...
between you and the Counselor on your prior posting?"
"Yes, sir," said Anne, remaining calm, to her surprise. "He was
not... impressed with my refusal to talk to him and he
tried... other methods." She sighed. "I suppose he noticed that
I would talk to him more readily if he touched me, so..." she
shrugged. "He decided to run with it."
"You don't have to elaborate, Lieutenant." Brennan closed his
eyes for a moment, then opened them, looking away. "I thought that
kind of conduct had been eradicated from among us a long time ago."
He looked back at her. "I'm sincerely sorry that you had
to undergo that kind of torture. No one deserves that kind of behaviour
toward them, and I would not wish it on anyone. And you were right in
leaving that kind of situation."
"Thank you, sir," said Anne quietly. For the first time in a long
while, she felt as though she were doing something right.
"And this must have required an immense courage on your part to
vocalize these things." His look was quite serious. "Thank
you for honouring me with such trust."
"And thank you for listening, sir," said Anne. "I appreciate it."
"I'm happy that I was of some assistance to you," he
smiled. "At this point, I would usually recommend some kind of
session with the Counsellor, but as you seemed quite averse to that
prospect...."
"Actually, Commander," said Anne, looking up, "I think that is a
sound idea."
"You're sure? You seemed quite adamant about it
earlier... I was concerned."
Anne blushed.
"I... might try talking with her just the same,"
she said. "I wasn't exactly myself this morning."
She smiled. "After all, Counselor Tats-Marush *is* a woman...
if somewhat combative. I'm sure we can try to work things
out, sir."
"Very good. That's the spirit." He grinned. "Well. Was
there anything else you wanted addressed, Lieutenant?"
"No, I don't believe so... not at this point in time," she said.
Brennan nodded and stood up. "In that case, Lieutenant," he said,
"you are dismissed." He gathered up some of the PADDs and
indicated that Anne should precede him out the door.
Anne headed toward her office, a new sense of determination
and energy in her steps. She had confided in Commander Brennan,
and she would try to make amends with the Counselor. All she had to
do now was to see how her department was doing.
Respectfully submitted,
Masako Goto Takako Nagumo
Lt. Anne Murray, Ph.D. Cmdr. D.J. Brennan
CSciO XO
USS CHESAPEAKE NCC-31813 USS CHESAPEAKE NCC-31813
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Takako Nagumo
http://www.oocities.org/TimesSquare/6318/
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CDR Daniel J. Brennan XO USS CHESAPEAKE, Green Fleet
LCDR Sian-Mairead Flynn, MD CMO USS ALEXANDER NEVSKY, Green Fleet
LCDR Duncan A. Morrell INS ALB Holodeck 4
CDR Julianna M. Sforza COMREC Commander, Starfleet Records
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"So *that's* what LCDR stands for... 'Librarian, Cyberbabe,
Dominatrix, Riotgrrl.'" -- an ASR writer who remains unnamed
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