From: Christine Fontaine
Date: Wed, 16 Apr 1997 21:32:29 -0400
Subject: USS CHESAPEAKE: A Friend In Need
<< NRPG >>
Warning: "Touchy material" - similar to the material in "Second Round"
<< RPG >>
SD 90416.2124
MD 05.10xx (sometime during Anne's counselling session)
Scene: USS CHESAPEAKE: Counsellor's Office: Reception Area
Lieutenant Commander Catherine Ledoux was concerned. Worried about Anne,
worried about Stavay, the CHESAPEAKE's Chief Medical Office could not keep
still. Pacing back and forth, back and forth, the veterinarian would soon
begin to wear a path in the Counsellor's carpet.
Truth be told, Catherine was also feeling just a little bit embarrassed.
One simply did *not* go barging in to another person's counselling session.
Not only was it not polite, it simply wasn't *right*. Catherine, however,
had been acting on instinct, and when she had heard the rucus being raised
in the ajoining office, well, she simply couldn't sit still any longer.
Alerted by the commotion, the vet had simply acted without any forethought.
Brushing back a golden curl that tumbled onto her forhead like a chestnut
horse's forelock, Catherine continued to pace. Worried about her friend
Anne, the doctor did not know what to think. Anne had clearly been upset,
tears had streaked her face like a violent rain shower. Catherine was also
concerned for Stavay. From her previous night's conversation with Anne,
Catherine knew that her friend did not feel at all comfortable around
counsellors, and although Anne had not been very specific, Catherine had
sensed that Anne's experiences with the counsellor aboard the BELLOPHORON
had been anything but pleasant.
Sighing, Catherine mentally reviewed her conversations with Anne, wishing
that her memory was a little sharper than it had been in recent days.
Berating herself for her own self-absorbance, Catheirne realized that she
had monopolized a great deal of Anne's time taking about herself and Rich,
when Anne probably also needed someone to talk to.
Well, she couldn't do anything about that now. What she *could* do however,
was to let Anne know that she was available, that she'd listen anytime Anne
needed an ear. Catherine could be a compassionate, sympathetic listener -
when she wasn't caught up in her own problems.
*** *** *** *** *** ***
First Catherine heard the low hiss of the door as it slid open. Looking up
sharply, concern etched clearly upon her face, Catherine saw Anne step out
of the office. Unable to decipher the look upon Anne's face, Catherine
approached the Chief Science Officer, but did not come too close.
"Anne?" the doctor queried softly, her voice low and gentle.
"Anne, are you alright?" *What a stupid question,* Catherine thought to
herself, mentally grimacing, while carefully keeping her expression neutral.
*Of course she's not alright.*
Anne wished that she could lie and say that she was all right; after all,
Catherine should be heading into Stavay's office soon. On the other hand...
Friendship also necessitated trust... and trust came only with honesty.
No matter what happened, Anne knew that she could not lie to Catherine.
At least, not any more.
"Oh, Catherine..." the brave smile she had put on for the benefit of the
Counselor left her face. "I... I'm sorry, I don't know... I thought this
is what I wanted to do... what I needed to do... but..." She shook her
head. "No," she said quietly, "I'm not all right."
"Anne," Catherine continued, her voice gentle and reassuring, the same voice
that she used with critically injured patients. "Anne - could you use some
company right now, or would you rather be alone? If you need to talk, I'll
listen. On the other hand, if you'd just like someone to be with you, I can
do that too. Sometimes, just having another person present in the same room
can be comforting." Catherine gave Anne an encouraging smile, letting Anne
know that it was her decision, and that any answer was perfectly fine.
"Thank you, Catherine," said Anne, smiling at her friend. "I'd love to
have your company, but..." she looked back toward the door leading into
the Counselor's office. "You have your own appointment," she pointed out.
"My appointment can wait, Anne," Catherine said softly. "After all, I have
two days of vacation." She smiled. "I promise, I will come back," the
doctor half-joked, trying to put at least a ghost of a smile on Anne's
face. "If you'd like some company right now, I'm here for you Anne."
Catherine glanced towards Stavay's office. "All I need to do it let the
counsellor know I'll be back later."
Anne smiled a little at Catherine's joke, though she felt rather guilty
about taking this time away from her.
"If... you're sure," said Anne, grateful for the offer, "I'd really
appreciate it."
"Of course I'm sure, Anne," assured Catherine quietly. "I'll be right back."
Catherine quickly walked over to the counsellor's office, and tentatively
stuck her head through the door.
"Counsellor, are you all right?" she quietly asked, concerned.
Stavay looked up. "Fine. It's just that it wasn't easy for Anne to talk
about. I'm alright... just tired."
Catherine nodded. "I'm going to take Anne back to her quarters," she
said softly. "Could I perhaps see you tomorrow morning?" she squeaked
out, her cheeks flushed.
"Tomorrow morning would be fine, Doctor."
"Thank you." Quickly, Catherine turned, walking back towards Anne.
While Catherine went to discuss rescheduling with the Counselor, Anne
stared at the reception desk. She felt so guilty taking away Catherine's
counseling time, when she so badly needed it; on the other hand, Anne
knew herself. She would not, could not survive being alone now.
When Catherine returned, Anne suggested that they go to her quarters.
Nodding her agreement, Catherine let Anne lead the way, offering her
silent, comforting presence to her friend.
----------------
CSciO's Quarters
----------------
When they reached her quarters, Anne finally felt able to let her guard
down; she hadn't wanted to look out of control out in public, where anyone
might pass by. But now... she didn't have the strength. With a quick
apology to Catherine, she sat down at her desk, putting her head in her
hands. She remained there for a minute, then looked up.
"I'm sorry, Catherine," she said, rather ashamed. "I ask you to come with
me, then I just..." she trailed off, shaking her head.
"It's okay Anne," Catherine offered her a reassuring smile. "Sometimes
it's just nice not to be alone. If you want or need to talk, I'll
listen. If you just need some quiet time, that's okay too. But you know
I'm here, if you need me."
Regaining her composure, Anne glanced at Catherine, a smile beginning to
form. It was a rather odd smile, partly embarrassed, partly mischievous.
"Will you play a duet with me, Catherine?" she asked, gesturing to the
piano. "I'm afraid I can't play much, but I *can* play 'Heart and
Soul.'"
Catherine smiled. "That's one that I can play too," she stated, moving
towards Anne's piano.
As Anne made her way over towards the piano as well, Catherine lightly
ran her fingers over the keys, much as she had the previous evening.
Tentatively, she pressed middle C. As the string vibrated, a clean note
rang out.
Turning to smile at Anne, Catherine asked, "now which do you want - the
high notes, or the low notes?"
"I'll take the low, Catherine," Anne replied. "I always played the low
with my cousin, Myron. He could only play one note at a time."
Catherine nodded, smiling. Anne had spoken fondly about her cousin, Myron.
It seemed that they shared a special bond.
Arranging themselves at the piano, Anne sitting to the left, Catherine on
the right. "I'll let you start," Catherine suggested, "then I'll come in
after a couple of bars."
As Anne started playing the familiar rhythm line of the piece, Catherine
began tapping her foot in time to the tune. After Anne played her part
through two times, Catherine joined in with the melody. Tapping the keys,
Catherine began smiling.
After a few runs through, Catherine began improvising around the melody.
She tried changing the rhythm, just a bit, then playing two notes at the
same time - one an octave above the other. Catherine smiled at Anne,
hoping that she was beginning to relax, just a bit.
Eventually, after they started hitting more wrong notes than right notes,
they turned away from the piano.
"Have you had breakfast yet?" Anne asked Catherine.
Shaking her head, the vet replied, "no."
"I haven't, either," said Anne. "Will you join me?"
"Certainly," said Catherine softly.
"I'll go get the table from my bedroom," said Anne. She returned a minute
later, her night stand in tow. She set up the table, placing the chairs
facing each other.
Going to the replicator, Anne ordered her breakfast and Catherine's; she
placed them on the table after Catherine had sat down, then seated herself.
After grace was said and she had laid her napkin across her lap, Anne
noticed consciously, for the first time, that Catherine's meal did not
look all that filling... and that, of the small amount, Catherine wasn't
eating too much, either. Not wanting to cause any ripples, however, Anne
decided not to comment on it. Perhaps Catherine wasn't too hungry.
She made some conversation instead, asking enough questions to make it
seem natural, yet talking enough to give Catherine enough time to catch
up with her.
Anne had made her way through half her bowl of cereal before she realized
that Catherine was not eating.
"Catherine?" asked Anne, putting down her spoon. She looked at her friend
carefully. The tension that had been evident the night before was
beginning to resurface in Catherine's expression. "Are you all right?" She
got up from her side of the table and went to stand next to Catherine,
maintaining the usual distance that she kept between herself and others...
but only just. "Is there something wrong?"
Catherine shook her head, brushing back a loose curl that fell foreward.
"No, I'm fine. I'm just not very hungry. I guess vacation doesn't agree
with me," she tried to joke, giving Anne a weak smile.
Sensing that she might be treading on sensitive ground, Anne stopped
her questioning. She merely nodded and tried to smile back at Catherine,
hoping that she really was all right... and worried that she
probably wasn't.
"Are you okay Anne?" Catherine asked in turn, still concerned for her
friend. Then, cheeks blushing in embarrassment she added, "I'm sorry I
walked in on your session. I... I just heard some noise so I was
concerned." Catherine stared at the floor, hoping that her apology didn't
sound foolish.
"It's all right, Catherine," said Anne. She sat back down at her own
place, resting her chin on her hands. "I think you came just in time,"
she said softly. "I was very close to..." Close to what? Killing the
Counselor, probably. Either that... or killing herself. She realized
that the pause was geting a bit long and smiled rather foolishly. "I was
very close to totalling her office," she finished. It was just truthful
enough to make her feel better, yet not too revealing of her inner
turmoil. Catherine had problems of her own; Anne wasn't about to saddle
her with more of hers.
Catherine nodded sympathetically, concern for Anne clearly registering upon
the vet's countenance. Strong emotions could often impell one into action,
and that action wasn't always peaceful or non-destructive. Strong emotions
demanded a release, and sometimes the only release was through physical
action.
Anne crumpled some sugar cubes into her cereal bowl, not seeming to notice
what she was doing. She looked at Catherine.
"I never told anyone about it before," she said quietly, "and when I told
Counselor Tats-Marush, it was... unexpected. I guess I wasn't ready."
She let the crumpled sugar fall off her hand. "I never told Myron... he
wouldn't have understood. And..." she sighed, about to make her second
revelation. She stood up and went to her bedroom; she didn't feel like
staying in the living area.
Very worried about her friend, Catherine followed Anne at a discrete
distance, not wanting to intrude upon her personal space. Something serious
was disturbing Anne, and Catherine was not going to leave her alone until
she was sure that Anne was at least starting to feel better.
Anne had collapsed on her bed, sobbing. She recovered after about half a
minute, however, and looked up at Catherine with a mixture of shame,
fear, and pleading.
"Kevin Mallory raped me, Catherine," she said finally. "During one of
the 'chats' we used to have... he just..." She shuddered. "He had the
upper hand already... why did he have to do this, too?" she asked, to no
one in particular. She began to pick up a pillow to throw, then lowered
it. She was too tired, too worn out from the recent emotional strain.
She put her head in her hands and burst into tears again.
Catherine was shocked. Keeping her expression carefully neutral and
supportive, the vet couldn't believe that a Starfleet Officer could violate
somone in such a cruel, dehumanizing fashion. No wonder Anne was so upset.
No wonder Anne didn't like counsellors.
Filled with sympathy and compassion for Anne, Catherine didn't know what to
say or do. What could you say to someone under these circumstances? All
she could really do was offer her friendship and support.
Carefully, hoping that her touch would neither startle, frighten nor offend
Anne, Catherine sat down next to her on the bed.
When Catherine leaned over and gave her a friendly, supportive hug, Anne
did not pull away.
"I'm sorry Anne," Catherine said gently. "I wish I had some answers for
you, but I don't. But it's all right to cry, it's all right to be angry,
and upset, and hurt. And I'll always listen." Then she paused, not
knowing what else to say.
"Thaank you, Catherine," said Anne. She smiled at Catherine, whose touch
was like a nurturing ray of sunlight. "I'm... I'm glad I told you."
Catherine smiled. "Me too. Sometimes things are easier to bear when we
share them with someone. Thank you for trusting me, Anne," she added softly.
"Now," Catherine continued, still smiling at Anne, "why don't we tackle
that piano again. I know another couple of simple pieces like 'Heart and
Soul' that we could try."
Nodding, Anne replied, "that sounds fine." She paused, quietly spoke
again, "thank you Catherine."
"You're welcome."
Respectfully submitted,
Chris Fontaine Masako Goto
LCDR Catheirne Ledoux, DVM LT Anne Murray, PhD
Chief Medical Officer Chief Science Officer
USS CHESAPEAKE USS CHESAPEAKE
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