From: Takako Nagumo
Date: Thu, 17 Apr 1997 13:14:12 -0400
Subject: USS CHESAPEAKE: A Big Run-in
SD 90417.1605
MD 5.2055
Scene: Marine Barracks
Wonders never cease, he thought. Commander Daniel J. Brennan,
Executive Officer, USS CHESAPEAKE, had heard many, many stories
aboard Starfleet vessels during his career -- some excruciatingly
funny, some unrepeatable in mixed company -- but this was a new
one.
"So, Lieutenant T'Sharet," Brennan asked, "you're saying that
Mister O'Graeach claims he fell out of the air duct into the
Marines' women's shower area because he was chasing a... rabbit?"
O'Graeach opened his mouth to say something, but Brennan raised
his hand, and he closed it quickly. T'Sharet, the Vulcan Marine,
answered him evenly, cool and logical, as Lieutenant Shachor
and a squad of Marines looked on.
"I believe the term he used was... 'bunny.'" She paused. "Sir."
Brennan looked at the Ensign sitting on the cot in front of him.
Ozwald O'Graeach was still wet, although his uniform was beginning
to show some dry patches. He turned back to the Marine.
"And what do *you* think happened, Lieutenant?"
She glanced at the Ensign, then looked back at the Commander. "In the
absence of the... 'bunny,' sir, the only possible conclusion is that the
Ensign entered the air ducts with the full intention of entering the
Marine women's showers."
Brennan turned back to O'Graeach. "How do you explain yourself,
Ensign?"
"I... uh... well... I *did* chase a bunny through the air
ducts...."
The Ensign was obviously a nervous wreck. The wet uniform was not
helping, either. Brennan turned to another one of the Marines.
"Would you please get the Ensign a towel?"
The Marine gave Shachor a brief look. He nodded, and she went off
to get a towel. Brennan smiled.
"Thank you." He turned back to the Ensign, his voice a little
more gentle this time. "Where is the... 'bunny,' Mister
O'Graeach?"
"I don't *know*!" he wailed, putting his head in his hands as the
Marine returned and put the towel around his shoulders. "If I
*knew*, I wouldn't be in this... predicament!"
There was no sound, except for O'Graeach's sniffles. He finally
added a very soft "sir."
Brennan nodded, then looked at Shachor.
"Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Lieutenant." He
tapped his commbadge. "Brennan to Security."
"Security!?" cried O'Graeach. A murderous look from the marine
standing next to him stopped him instantly.
came the reply.
"Chief, would you please send a team to the Marines Women's
Barracks, please. Escort duty."
"Thank you. Brennan out."
He closed the connection and turned to the MCO again. "Security
will take it from here."
"Yes, Commander...."
The next instant, Brennan found himself attacked by the now
desperate 75-kilogram Irishman. O'Graeach's words came tumbling
out, wailing and sobbing, most of it made more incomprehensible
with his Irish accent.
"Pleeeeease!!! No!!!" O'Graeach had managed to grab Brennan
around the waist, and the Commander found himself in the frantic
embrace of the red-head. "I swear, there was a bunny...! I was
playing with it in the Biology Lab and it escaped, and I had to
get it before the Lab folks found out...!"
Brennan tried to peel the man's arms from him, but he had a
surprisingly strong grip. The Marines were trying to pull him
off, but that only increased the Irishman's desperation.
All of a sudden, somebody's foot found a slippery patch on the
floor and all of them -- Brennan, O'Graeach, the Marines --
tumbled to the ground, missing the nearby table by a hair.
Daniel was in a quandary. He was in pain, too. There were at
least six ablebodies on top of him now, and O'Graeach's arms still
held him in their powerful grip. His wailing reached a fever
pitch.
Suddenly, the Security squad rushed into the Barracks. They had
expected to find the Commander, who had shown such cool on the
Bridge the day before, calmly standing with a few Marines.
What they found was a tangle of yelling, screaming people
piled on the ground, arms and legs sticking out all over the
place.
They had no choice.
They dove in.
Daniel felt the sudden thud as more men piled on. This is as bad as
playing rugby, he thought, as he struggled to get loose not only
from O'Graeach, but out from under the pile of people on top of him.
He finally managed to drag himself out of the pile, with the Irishman
still in tow.
O'Graeach suddenly stopped wailing. He was pointing to something
on the table.
A beret. A Marine beret. Nothing special, really... but wait....
The beret was moving. O'Graeach rushed forward, and before
Brennan could stop him, he jumped for it.
And out jumped a white furry rabbit.
Seeing the red-headed humanoid rushing headlong for it was
obviously too much for the poor animal. It escaped from his
clutches, hopping from the table to the lockers, to the cots,
and O'Graeach started chasing it around the room.
"COME 'ERE YOU STUPID BUNNY!!!"
His yelling made only made the animal jump farther.
The Marines and Security men had finally extricated themselves
from the pile when one of them spotted the rabbit.
"THERE IT IS!!!"
The rabbit was now not only being chased by a desperate Irishman
but a squad of Marines and Starfleet Security. It hopped for its
life from one place to another, escaping this Marine's arms or
just slipping past that Petty Officer's fingers. Brennan saw
T'Sharet barely miss tripping over somebody's leg when he saw the
rabbit falling toward her.
"Watch out!"
The rabbit flew through the air...
... and landed on her head.
The room became stock still. Even O'Graeach stared, panting.
The animal sat, perched on top of the Vulcan's head, nose and
whiskers twitching. It turned its head, looking at all the
humanoids scattered in the room as if this was all in a day's
work. T'Sharet broke the silence.
"I believe, sir," said the Vulcan, her demeanor remarkably well
controlled under the circumstances, "that I was quite mistaken."
"What in the world is going on?!?!?!"
The new voice made everyone turn toward it.
It was a junior Lieutenant in Science blue. The shocking blue hair --
and O'Graeach's visible shrinking -- showed her to be Karen Decker.
She walked forward and went straight to T'Sharet. At a little
urging, the rabbit hopped down from her head and into Murray's
arms. She carefully held it, then looked at Brennan, O'Graeach,
the Marines, and the squad from Security. She let out a short
quick sigh, shook her head in disbelief, and left the room in a
huff.
Brennan looked around. Chairs had been knocked over and cots had
been shoved, and the barracks was a mess. He looked at Shachor.
"We'll help you right the room, Lieutenant."
"Thank you for the offer, sir," he said, his voice carefully
neutral, "but I believe the best thing right now is to have the
Ensign leave the Barracks... and have him stay as far away from it
as possible."
"As you wish, Lieutenant." He looked at O'Graeach, but spoke to
Security. "Please escort Mister O'Graeach to his quarters."
"Should we post guard there, sir?"
"No. I don't believe that is necessary." A faint smile appeared
on his face. "I think he has been punished enough."
The squad leader nodded, then directed his men to get the Ensign.
The four men quietly escorted O'Graeach out of the Barracks.
Well, not quite. As he followed them up the corridor to the
turbolift, Brennan could hear the faint chuckling and something
about "chasing bunnies."
Respectfully Submitted,
Takako Nagumo,
CDR Daniel J. Brennan
XO, USS CHESAPEAKE (NCC-31813)
Task Force Bravo, Green Fleet
NRPG:
Fabian, Naomi: I hope I did not misplay Oz or David. :)
Masako: Ditto for Decker, although she only had a brief appearance. :)
--
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Takako Nagumo
http://www.oocities.org/TimesSquare/6318/
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CDR Daniel J. Brennan XO USS CHESAPEAKE, Green Fleet
LCDR Sian-Mairead Flynn, MD CMO USS ALEXANDER NEVSKY, Green Fleet
LCDR Duncan A. Morrell INS ALB Holodeck 4
CDR Julianna M. Sforza COMREC Commander, Starfleet Records
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"So *that's* what LCDR stands for... 'Librarian, Cyberbabe,
Dominatrix, Riotgrrl.'" -- an ASR writer who remains unnamed
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