chapter_two_S

*****

Stars twinkled in a midnight sky, winking down at two people standing
on a balcony far below, almost as if they knew something no one else
dud. A light breeze caught wayward strands of golden hair and swirled
them about an impish face. Soft, peach coloured lips compressed in a
firm line, gorgeous crystal blues flashing in annoyance, "No. I told
you once, I'm not going to say it again. I have to do this on my own,
Darien!"

"You're so stubborn, why won't you let me help you?" he asked trying to
keep his temper in check. Serena and he had been arguing for the past
half hour about her options. In that time, he'd had the chance to
learn that, being forced to grow up fast, Serena also had a wilfully
stubborn streak a mile wide.

Her gaze never left his, "Why? Because I don't want you to see me as I
get with him." She told him honestly. "I swore when I left two weeks
ago and you and I had that talk that I wouldn't cater to him or pay the
bills or anything but I have no choice!" she sighed and stomped her
foot in frustration, "Don't you see, I'm tied up in this until he
either kicks the bucket or until I'm able to move out on my own!"

The past two weeks had been hell. Her father had insisted that she go
to her 'tutoring' sessions on time every day after school. Serena had
agreed, having no qualms with spending time with her new-found friend.
They had done everything from studying for her exams, to watching TV
marathons to going to the movies and just walking around talking. On
top of it she had been working ungodly hours at the swimming pool and
doing her best to keep Sammy and her dad out of the house at the same
time. To top that off she had finals in two days and her brother was
getting more unpredictable. Her father, on the other hand, was slowly
going downhill. His health had gone down rapidly, first with coughs
and now with the flu. To top it off he wouldn't stop drinking and
Serena could tell he would only get worse. On top of that he'd started
mistaking her for her mother and it was starting to make her scared to
go home. One day she knew she wouldn't find the nerve to go back.

"You could leave," Darien told her calmly.

"And go where?" she asked hotly, "Here? Move in with the 'oh-so
-intelligent' University student? Yeah right! What would people say if
Sammy and I moved in with you? I do have some pride, and reputation,
left, you know." Her eyes now held a note of pain along with
frustration and anger. She knew exactly what kind of rumours that
would start and wanted to avoid those at all costs, believing that
Darien would hate her for them eventually.

He sensed she wasn't angry with him, but at life in general and again
had this very strange urge to grab her and run away, to shelter her
from anything that would harm her. The urge was getting to be a very
familiar companion nowadays. He frowned, mostly to himself and she
misinterpreted his look.

"What, you don't like the truth when it hits you in the face?" she
asked hotly.

He couldn't help himself. The absurdity of the situation hit him and
his face broke into a stunning, breath stealing, heart racing smile
that knocked the ever stoic Serena for a loop as he started to laugh.
"Serena... You... " He couldn't continue as he laughed harder. The
faint breeze tugged at his hair, ruffling it and brushing it across his
forehead and eyes, lending him a boyish look.

She stared at him, her mouth open. 'How did I miss his drop dead
gorgeous good looks?' she asked herself, unable to take her gaze off
his face. She mentally reigned herself in, fighting for inner balance.

"Feel better?" she asked him when he calmed down. He continued to
smile and she found that she had a lump in her throat and that she was
having a hard time breathing. She stepped away from him quickly,
wrapping her hands around her elbows as she crossed her arms across her
chest. She moved away rapidly, not looking at him as she fought to
control her breathing, suddenly feeling cold and hot all at once.

She closed her eyes for a moment.

"You alright?" he asked softly from somewhere behind her. She barely
caught the words, but she nodded, her back still to him. A gentle hand
slid onto her shoulder, squeezing slightly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean
to be callous."

She smiled, opening her eyes as she continued to fight to find her
center of balance inside her. With him so close, for some reason, it
was always hard to find, almost as if it was missing. "I'm alright.
And I'm sorry for yelling at you, Dare. I really do appreciate you
being here for me when none of my other friends are."

He enfolded her in a gentle hug from behind, hugging her tightly around
the shoulders. She felt his weight solid and comforting, against her
back and leaned into him, raising her arms to wrap them around his,
twining her fingers with his. "I know it's not me you're mad at," he
told her quietly.

She felt tears threaten and blinked them back. She'd cried more in the
last couple of weeks than in the last ten years and was disgusted with
herself. She swore silently she wouldn't cry anymore. "My dad's not
going to last much longer," she told him quietly, revealing what had
been on her mind for the last few days.

Darien nodded, kissing the top of her head and then resting his chin
lightly on her mop of golden hair, "How bad is he?"

She sighed, leaning into him, unconsciously needing his support. "He
should be in a hospital, but I can't make him go. One night I'll come
home from your place and..." she couldn't continue as her voice became
choked and tears threatened once again.

He held her close, wishing he could some how help. "What will happen
to you and Sam once he'd gone?" he asked, voicing the one question she
had not wanted to give any thought to.

She turned in his arms and buried her face against his chest, unable to
speak.

He hugged her to him, not knowing what else to do. He felt her shake
and raised on hand to gently rub her back. He felt an almost over
powering urge to kiss her tears away but wouldn't let himself do it.
Holding his emotions in rigid control, he stroked her hair gently and
murmured nonsense to her to comfort her. "Darien," she got out with
difficulty.

"Yes, love?" he asked without thinking.

She raised dry puffy eyes to his and offered him a shaky smile, "I
think I'd better go home now."

"Are you sure you don't want to crash on my couch? Your brother isn't
home and your dad can take care of himself. It's obvious he doesn't
want you or Sam around." He asked, searching her gaze.

She nodded, "I'm sure. I'll see you tomorrow, alright?"

He nodded, hugging her solidly for a moment longer before reluctantly
letting her go. She was strong willed and intelligent; she could take
care of herself, he told himself. He found that hard to believe with
how fragile he'd seen her.

She stepped out of his arms and disappeared into his apartment. Two
minutes later she exited through the front doors of the building and
looked up, towards his balcony. He waved down to her. She looked so
small and alone standing down on the street by herself. He fought the
urge to go to her and, as she turned away, continued to watch her walk
slowly home.

*****

A huge crash sounded from the house as Serena approached, her sweater
wrapped tightly around herself. She drew herself up and pulled the
mask that had been missing so much of late over her face. She ran
towards the house, alarmed, as another crash sounded. She burst
through the front door in time to find her father, in a drunken stupor,
throwing the family chairs about. The dinning room chairs were smashed
to pieces on the ground. As she watched horrified he threw another
chair and she ran towards him. "Dad! Stop!"

Glazed, haunted eyes turned her way and she froze as they widened.
"Rose?"

Serena choked, "Dad! It's me, Serena! Please dad, I'm not mom! Snap
out of it! Please!"

He started walking towards her, his eyes looking her up and down. "You
changed your hair... and where's your dress, I can't give you a quickie
like that." He was vulgar and rude and his words were slurred.

She nearly choked as his meaning hit her full force. "DAD! NO!" she
screamed at him, realizing as she did so that he was beyond her reach.
She was almost to his side by now and she skidded, stopping about an
arm's length away from him. She suddenly felt a trickle of fear run
down her spine, feeling an almost overwhelming urge to flee.

He reached for her, grasping the corner of her sweater as she lunged
out of the way to avoid him. She nearly choked as he yanked on it,
tearing the weak seams up the side. She jerked hard out of his grasp,
running for the door to get away as the realization that he was going
to do something terrible to her hit full force. She scrambled away as
she heard him hoot about someone playing hard to get. She ran for the
door, terrified of what would happen if she didn't make it.

"Come back, honey, daddy's got something for you!" came the lewd holler
from behind her. She shuddered; wondering how such a small distance
could seem like forever. She burst from the house, slamming the door
behind her, shivering as she heard a large, heavy-set body crash into
the solid oak door. They fell on the other side and she froze,
wondering if he'd knocked himself out cold. Unable to cope, she ran
from the house, clutching the torn edges of her shirt together to keep
them from getting in the way.

She fought back the tears. 'So much for the 'he'll never hurt me'
theory,' she found herself thinking bitterly as tears burned the back
of the throat. She ran, letting her feet guide her. She ran until her
lungs burned and her feet ached. Finally, when she looked up, she was
in front of a rusted iron gate and, knowing exactly where she was
going, quickly made her way among the graves. Her golden hair gleamed
in the faint starlight as she sat on her bench, looking at the familiar
head stone.

"Mom," she said quietly, "I don't know how to tell you this, but dad is
getting worse. He won't listen to me and tonight I think he was going
to do something terrible. I ran from him for the first time in a long
time, mom, I'm not proud of that. How can I help him? Can I help him?
Oh mom, I wish you were here," she said brokenly, kneeling next to the
head stone before wrapping her arms as far as she could around it and
squeezing. "I miss you mom. I really wish you were here, then none of
this would have happened."

The breeze picked up slightly, kissing her warm cheeks and she closed
her eyes as it whispered softly to her battered and broken heart. She
smiled, letting the gentle fingers and tendrils wrap around her, her
hair blowing about her face, gently sliding over satin smooth skin.
Her fingers traced the rough edges of the head stone and she bowed her
head, letting the tears trail down her cheeks. She bit her lip to keep
the sob from escaping, but the warm tears continued to slide down her
heated cheeks. She tried to breathe through her nose but had to open
her mouth and a ragged sob escaped from her lips.

She didn't even question his presence when warm hands slid over her
shoulders and strong arms enfolded her in an embrace. She tried to
draw in a breath and found it hard, her throat blocked by emotions.
She didn't look at who held her, but wrapped her arms around his waist
and buried her face in his shoulder.

"Oh Darien," she sobbed, "He... he was out of control!" She told him,
her words husky from her closed throat, the familiar feel of his hands
on her back allowing her to let go for a few moments before she found
the need to regain control of her wayward emotions. She continued to
cry into his shirt before she drew in a shuddering breath and took
control of herself again. 'So much for not crying anymore.' She thought
sourly. 'If Darien wasn't so nice he'd have sent you packing, probably
thinks you're some female who can't stop crying,' she inwardly winced
as she hoped that wasn't the picture he'd formed of her.

"I'm here, Serena," he told her gently, speaking for the first time,
"You're safe." His arms were still around her, holding her close,
sheltering her for a few moments from life and the harsh realities she
had to face. He didn't let her go even when she started to pull away
from him, needing to feel her close to him.

He'd been standing on his balcony since she'd left, staring at the
night sky wondering how he would keep playing the shoulder for her when
all he wanted to do was grab her and tell her she could never go back
to her father again. He'd suddenly had this sick feeling and knew
Serena needed him. Not questioning his intuition, he'd let his feet
lead and had found her, hugging her mother's headstone.

His hands slid up the sides of her body and he froze as his hands
encountered skin. He pushed her out to arm's length and looked at her,
really looked at her, noting the haunted look in her eyes and the torn
sweatshirt. "What happened?" he asked her softly, making sure his
touch and voice remained gentle and calm. He felt anger and bile rise
up in his throat at the thought of someone trying to hurt her.

She took in a shaky breath, "My fa-" her voice cracked and she
swallowed hard before trying again, "My father was going to... to -try-
something. He terrified me and so I ran." Tears blurred her vision as
she looked into his eyes. They were sympathetic and reassuring but she
noted that the skin around his eyes was tight, as if he was trying to
suppress his frustration. The infliction on the word try had not passed him by, nor the intended meaning.

She misread it and jerked away from him, "I'm sorry," she swiped at her
eyes, scrubbing the sensitive tissue with one moth-eaten cuff, "I
shouldn't burden you with all of this, you're probably tired of this
cry-baby teenager bawling all over you." She moved to get up, her
movements stiff as she sniffled.

Darien reached out and gently captured her arm around the wrist,
feeling the delicate bone beneath his fingers. "Don't go. I'm not mad
or angry or anything, not at you anyway. I just want to know what kind
of man does this to his own kids. He really needs help, Serena, he
won't get it on his own."

Serena looked at him, her eyes still puffy and red from her crying
bout, "Are you sure you don't mind me being around? I feel like I'm
monopolizing you. You spend next to every moment away from school or
work with me; even most of your breaks. I feel like you are
sacrificing yourself to be here for me and I appreciate it, I really
do, but I don't want you to resent me. I couldn't bare it if you
started to hate me." She said the last in a whisper that he barely
caught.

He stood and pulled her into his arms, cradling her gently, "Did you
ever wonder why I do so much for you?"

She didn't look at him, but her saw her ears turn pink. 'Guess not,'
he thought smiling. He gently pushed her hair back over her ears,
longing to continue the caress and sweep his hand into the silky
tresses, but he held back, not wanting to scare her off.

She looked up at him from beneath her lashes, suddenly feeling very
shy. He suppressed a groan. She had -no- idea what that look was
doing to him! "Serena, my sweet Serena, when you hurt, I hurt.
Haven't you realized that yet?"

She just continued to look at him, her wariness written in her eyes.
She wanted to believe him, but could she? It tore at his heart as he
saw the conflict in her soul through her eyes, thinking that her dad
might have scared this precious young woman so badly she would never be
able to trust him completely.

The despair that he fought every time he was with her threatened to
take over; the thought of never being more to her than her one and only
true friend. He fought it desperately, struggling with his heart and
mind against what his conscience said he shouldn't do.

He took a step back from her, feeling his control tenuous at best.
"Trust me, sweetheart, I never want to see you hurt, never. I feel so
helpless when you get so adamant that you've got to fight your battles
alone," his voice was quiet as he looked down into her wide eyes.
Whatever she'd been expecting him to say, this was not it! "I want to
protect you, but know I can't. I want you to know I'm here for you...
and I want..." he trailed off, putting his hands in his pockets and
looking away from her, fearing she'd see the hold that she had on him.

"You want what?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

He looked back at her and she sucked in a surprised breath as she saw
the emotions in his eyes. In their depth she saw determination, fear,
longing, love and... wait a sec, love? She blinked once and looked
again but it was still there.

"I want to be the one that takes care of you no matter what." He pulled
his hand out of his pocket and rubbed his fingers wearily over his
eyes, shielding his thoughts from her effectively. He didn't know that
he was already too late. "You mean so much to me... more than life..."
he stumbled over the words, trying to get them out, but also trying his
hardest not to scare her off. He looked at her then, his heart in his
eyes. "I can't hide it anymore, Serena, and I don't want to lose you
because of it. You once said that I could tell you anything and you'd
listen to me the same way I do to you. Can I-"

He was cut off as she launched herself at him, burrowing her face into
his strong chest, "Darien, my dear Darien," she murmured, tears welling
in her eyes and closing her throat, making her voice husky, "You can
tell me anything. You've done so much for me, I couldn't stand... I
don't know what I'd do if you left. Tell me anything, I'll listen."

He wrapped his arms around her carefully, fighting for self-control at
having her wrapped around him. He reminded himself of what her father
had tried to night and it was as effective as a cold shower. He hugged
her securely, careful not to touch the exposed skin of her side. "I
could lose you if I say what I want to, Serena. I don't want to lose
you, even if it means not saying what's tearing me apart to hide."

She looked up at him, her eyes shining as she saw, again, the love he
had for her in his eyes. "You love me." She said softly and then
chuckled as his expression went from earnest to mild shock. "Don't
look so surprised," she told him softly, "I read it in your eyes.
Besides," her voice dropped and Darien only caught her next words
because of the way the wind was blowing, "It's easy to identify in
someone else what you feel yourself."

He ducked his head to look into her eyes, a whisper away from her face,
"Does it bother you that I've fallen for the most engaging young woman
I've even had to tutor?" he asked her teasingly.

She smiled, a genuine smile that light up her eyes and shook her head,
her sunshine locks swinging slightly, "Not in the least. Do you mind
that your flawed pupil fell for you too?"

He bent down and daringly brushed a gentle kiss on the tip of her nose,
stealing her breath, "You're not flawed and no, not in the least. Come
on, I'll walk you home, alright?"

She shivered, and not because of the cold, as the events of the night
came back to her in a rush, causing her head to spin. The colour
drained from her face as icy fear crept back over her, crawling up her
backbone as she wrapped her arms around her own waist, trying to
surpass the physical reaction. She didn't succeed and was wrapped in
Darien's gently embrace. "Nothing will happen while I'm with you,
Sere." He reassured her.

"I know." She told him, her fear showing in her eyes as she looked up
at him, "It's not what he'll do to me that worried me." and her eyes
spoke volumes.

*****

Serena looked at the house light that was glowing as she stood at the
foot of the walkway. She felt tense and knew it by how tight her back
was. She felt the beginning of a headache and mentally pushed it
aside. She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders resolutely as
she began to walk slowly. She opened the front door cautiously, hoping
her dad was asleep. It was well past ten and her brother was gone for
the night, again. He spent more time at his friend's place than at
home and for that, Serena was grateful. Their dad was like a stranger
to him. "Dad?" she called softly, feeling the reassuring presence of
the man behind her as he gently took hold of her shoulder. There was
no answer to her cautious call.

She walked further into the house, her steps faltering as she
approached the living room doorway. She bit down on her lower lip as
she held her breath, peaking around the corner. She let it out
silently as she saw her father sprawled, face down, next to the liquor
cabinet. She frowned, noticing the blood on the carpet and her eyes
widened as she suddenly flew to her father's side, an awful suspicion
forming in her mind.

'I hope not,' she thought desperately, 'please God, no... not yet!' she
fumbled for a pulse on his clammy, cold skin and fell away from him
when she couldn't find one. She closed her eyes, completely forgetting
that Darien was still around and then opened them determinedly and
flipped her father onto his back. Her hand flew to her mouth in
reaction as bile rose in her throat, almost choking her and cutting off
her breathing. A shot glass was embedded in her father's chest, having
shattered inside his body. She could see his heart through the semi
-opaque bottom of the glass and it was still; no movement anywhere that
was visible. She closed her eyes from the sick sight, turning her head
away.

"Oh God," murmured a male voice from across the room. It held a sick,
pitying note and her eyes flew open. Darien was standing in the
doorway, his eyes glued to the glass and the blood on the floor. He
lifted his eyes to hers, as if sensing her gaze.

She stood then, and moved away from the awful sight of the man who had
been her father, not glancing down, as she walked slowly past Darien
and to the phone on the table just inside the hall. She picked it up
and dialled the number for the hospital.

The next few hours were a blur as the ambulance came and collected the
body on the living room floor. Serena refused to think of it as her
father and knew that if she did, she'd break down and cry... or shout
for joy that he was finally gone. Either way, she couldn't allow
herself the luxury yet. She stood by and gave her statement in a calm,
emotionless voice was Darien gave his report to the officer.

She only vaguely remembered telling the officer that her father had
been drinking for some time and this was hardly the first incident
related to his drinking, even if it was the worst and final one. The
state of the house proved her statement though. It was a mess, with
broken furniture and alcohol along with pools of vomit she hadn't seen
yet and several broken liquor bottles.

He was pronounced dead at the scene and taken to hospital in the
ambulance.

She felt numb, emotionally and physically. She didn't realize her
whole body and mind had just about shut off, dulling the pain of the
discovery. She felt cold and hot all at once and didn't object when
she felt a blanket dropped around her shoulders. She wrapped the ends
around herself in reaction, her eyes staring blankly ahead.

She roused enough to offer a token protest when she was picked up but
quickly fell back into herself, her mind tumbling over everything that
had happened in the past week as she felt guilt rise up, hot and heavy,
in her heart and soul. 'My fault,' she thought weakly, 'This is all my
fault. Had I stayed he'd still be alive, not on his way to a morgue.
Dad, don't go, I can't take care of Sam yet, you're not suppose to die
dammit! This isn't fair!' her heart cried out in anguish as the reality
of the situation finally hit her.

She and Sam were free of him. But much too soon. They were on their
own in a world that wouldn't accept the thought of an older sister,
almost 16, taking care of her younger brother.

The tears that came were swift and silent, falling down her cheeks as if a damn had
broken from wide, staring eyes. She didn't blink and the tears flowed, silent and
destructive, down her cheeks. The tears weren't for herself at first, but for her father, the
man he could have been but hadn't become; the uncertain future of her brother and the
last for the complete obliteration of her defences.

She was alone in the world now with a younger brother to support and a fight with the
legal system to keep them together. It was going to be a tough journey ahead but all she
could think of at that moment was the last time she'd seen her father alive and she
shivered, suddenly finding herself thinking he was better off dead. He'd already been dead
in spirit since her mother had died. And in the midst of tears she smiled, lifting her eyes
to the heavens, which seemed to move slowly with the even tread of her dark angel.

Her father and her mother had been reunited, she knew that in her heart, and they were
happy. If for no other reason, she was going to keep Sam with her to ensure that they
stayed that way. And through her tears she smiled as a star fell from the heavens, burning
brightly and then fading out of view. The world was at peace for now.

********

Author's note: I know, I know, I'm a stinker. What happens with Darien and Serena?
How about Sammy and Serena? Do they get shipped off to foster homes or what? I
know you all probably think I've got a lot of nerve to be writing the questions you're no
doubt asking but I have every intention of adding another chapter to this fic. One that
isn't as dark, but still has very real problem involved. And I promise some more romance
in the next one too for those of you who don't think there's enough.