Back in the '70's there was a flurry of Mommy! Mommy! jokes. They all centered on some poor, tortured kid and the cruel parent's response, resulting in a funny, although very sick and twisted joke. Gotta love 'em! LOL

I've purposely left off the dirty ones. Mommy! Mommy! jokes are sick enough, withought sinking lower!

Here are the original ones I heard:

Mommy! Mommy! I'm spinning in circles.
Shut up, kid, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

Mommy! Mommy! I thought it was my turn to lick the bowl?
Shut up, kid, and flush.

Mommy! Mommy! Are you sure this is how you make pizza?
Shut up, kid, and get back in the oven.

Mommy! Mommy! I'm getting dizzy!
Shut up, kid, or I'll slash the other wrist!

Mommy! Mommy! What is a juvenile deliquent?
Shut up, kid, light your cigarette, drink your whisky and deal those cards!

Mommy! Mommy! What's a werewolf?
Shut up, kid, and comb your face!

Mommy! Mommy! I hate tomato juice!
Shut up, kid, and drink it before it clots.

Here's a bunch I found all over the internet, so there's no way to attribute them to just one source. You can easily search for more if you've liked my selection here. Just use {"mommy mommy" jokes} in any search engine's box.

Some of these are just wannabes, but are still cute.

Mommy! Mommy! What's a transvestite?
Shut up, kid, and unhook Daddy's bra.

Mommy! Mommy! Are you sure this is how to learn to swim?
Shut up, kid, and get back in the sack!

Mommy! Mommy! Can I play in the sandbox?
Shut up, kid. Not until I find a better place to bury Daddy.

Mommy! Mommy! Can I play with grandma?
Shut up, kid. Not today, we already dug her three times this week.

Mommy! Mommy! Daddy fell in the campfire!
Shut up, kid, and get the barbecue sauce!

Mommy! Mommy! Daddy puked!
Shut up, kid, and get a fork, before your sister gets all the big chunks!

Mommy! Mommy! Daddy went through the meat grinder!
Shut up, kid, and eat your hamburger!

Mommy! Mommy! Daddy's on fire!
Shut up, kid, and get the marshmallows!

Mommy! Mommy! Daddy's running down the street!
Shut up, kid, and step on the gas!

Mommy! Mommy! Grandma's got a bruise!
Shut up, kid, and eat around it!

Mommy! Mommy! Grandpa's going out!
Shut up, kid, and throw some more gasoline on him then.

Mommy! Mommy!! Can I have tomato soup?
Shut up, kid, you know we can only have it once a month

Mommy! Mommy! I don't want to visit grandma!
Shut up, kid, and keep digging.

Mommy! Mommy! I don't want hamburgers for supper!
Shut up, kid, or I'll grind your other hand.

Mommy! Mommy! I don't want to see Niagara falls!
Shut up, kid, and get back in the barrel!

Mommy! Mommy! I hate daddy's guts.
Shut up, kid, and just leave them on the side of the plate.

Mommy! Mommy! I'm sick of learning how to swim!
Shut up, kid, or I'll flush it again!

Mommy! Mommy! It's cold and dark and damp down here.
Shut up, kid, or I'll flush it again.

Mommy! Mommy! My head hurts!
Shut up, kid, and lift the dart board higher!    <-- I loved this one!

Mommy! Mommy! What am I gonna be when I grow up?
Shut up, kid, you know you have AIDS!

Mommy! Mommy! What happened to all that dog food Fido wouldn't eat?
Shut up, kid, and eat your meat loaf.

Mommy! Mommy! What happened to all your scabs?
Shut up, kid, and eat your cornflakes!

Mommy! Mommy! When are we going to have Aunt Edna for dinner?
Shut up, kid, we haven't even finished your Grandmother yet.

Mommy! Mommy! Why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Shut up, kid, you'll wake your father.

Mommy! Mommy! Why do I have to hop everywhere?
Shut up, kid, or I'll chop off the other leg!

Mommy! Mommy! I don't want to go to Australia.
Shut up, kid, and keep rowing.

Mommy! Mommy! I hate spaghetti!
Shut up, kid, or I'll pull the veins out of your other arm.

Mommy! Mommy! There's something in daddy's eye!
Shut up, kid, and eat around it.

Mommy! Mommy! Why can't we get a trash compactor?
Shut up, kid, and chew!

Mommy! Mommy! How will we ever find Daddy on this golf course?
Shut up, kid, and keep searching the sand traps!

Mommy! Mommy! Why don't I have any fingers?
Shut up, kid, and eat your french fries!   <-- Another good one!

Mommy! Mommy! When will we have this nice yellow pudding again?
Shut up, kid, you know grandma's leg is no longer infected.

Mommy! Mommy! I'd like to play marbles now!
Shut up, kid, you can't use Grandpa's glass eye today!

Mommy! Mommy! I like my brother very much.
Shut up, kid, you can't have another slice.

Mommy! Mommy! I don't like fishing.
Shut up, kid, and stop squirming.

Mommy! Mommy! ! When is the pool going to be ready?
Shut up, kid, and haul another bucket.

Mommy! Mommy!! Helen got run over by a steamroller!
Shut up, kid, I'm in the bathroom - slide her under the door, and don't forget the maple syrup.

Mommy! Mommy!! How come sister gets to watch TV and I can't?
Shut up, kid, or I'll cut your ears off, too!

Mommy! Mommy!! I want to play with uncle Harry!
Shut up, kid, and close the coffin!

Mommy! Mommy! Why is Daddy bent over and crying?
Shut up, kid, and eat your hot dog!