A-sailing up and down the coast,
Now, here's the thing we love the most:
To screw each slave and drink a toast
to the Port Kar Ramship Squadron.
While sailing south we found a cave,
And in it was a mermaid slave,
And oh, the pleasures that she gave,
to the Port Kar Ramship Squadron!

A-sailing up to Torvaldsland,
Each sailor had his prick in his hand.
Oh say, my boys, can you make it stand?
In the Port Kar Ramship Squadron.
And when our ship is in drydock,
The slaves around us all do flock.
It's every man unfurl your cock,
In the Port Kar Ramship Squadron.

The Captain's slave had hair of sable,
And whenever she was able,
She gave the crew their daily screw,
Upon the galley table.

The name she answered to was Charlotte,
Born and bred a pleasure harlot
Her thighs at night were lily-white,
But in the morning they were scarlet.
But not long after he bought her,
She fell into the water.
Delighted squeals revealed that eels,
Had found her sexual quarters.

The crew they were all whiney,
Alone there on the briney .
From bed to bed, They looked for head,
But settled for some hiney.
The cabin boy's name was Learus,
A cunning young kajirus...
He lined his ass with broken glass,
So he wouldn't have to fear us.
But the slavegirls of Ar's Station,
Arose in indignation,
And glued his butt to keep it shut,
A smart retaliation!

The Captain of this lugger,
He was a randy bugger.
He wasn't fit to shovel shit
From one ship to another.
This Captain's name was Morgan,
A highly well-hung Gorgon.
A dozen crows lined up in rows,
Could pose upon his organ.
The First Mate served the Sardar,
And oh, he was a farter.
When the wind wouldn't blow,
And the ship wouldn't go,
Carter, the farter, would start her.
The Cook, whose name was Slater,
was quite the masturbator.
He'd pump and pump his massive stump,
And clean the mess up later.

Or, suddenly he'd rally!
He didn't dilly-dally.
Then shoot his bolt with a massive jolt,
And whitewash half the galley.
'Twas near to old Ar's Station,
To roars of approbation,
He sank a junk with a load of spunk
By combat masturbation.
The Captain was elated,
The crew investigated.
They found some sand in his prostate gland,
And he had to be castrated.
So now I end this serial,
Through sheer lack of material.

And bid landlubbers to wear rubbers,
and dodge disease venereal!