Phase I: The Search

A search
        within oneself
                for oneself
        ends as all searches end
                with a find
                        which may be or
        may not be worth the
                time spent.
                the energy spent
        and the worry caused.
Exhausted, well-spent,
        exuberant, glad,
                sad, weary,
                        rejoiceful----
        all these one may be
                at the discovery of
          what at first sems to be
                        oneself
          but turns out 
                        only to be
        another conglomeration 
                of "mes," "is" and "myselfs"
        all in one grand confusion.
The search
        what a futile search
                it may be.
                it may be.              

Phase II: The Find and Disappointment

Past the time of searching
        tired and confused
                one finds oneself
          at the gatewaay
                        to oneself
                unable
                        because of misuse
                        to enter the door to oneself,
        to confront oneself
                as oneself,
                        kneel to oneself
        in all recognition 
                        of oneself,
                to find oneself and not
          to
                run
                  from
                        oneself,
                                unable to face oneself
                  and rejoice in being oneself.
        Tired one lies
                upon the path
                        to oneself
                           facing onself
          but not seeing oneself.