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ELLEN'S 'HERE AND NOW' TOUR DIARY
Diary Entries before the Tour Starts

February 21,2003
My tour starts in less than three weeks. I can’t wait! I’ve been working on my act at a few clubs around Los Angeles. Last night went great. Of course, at this stage of the process I haven’t memorized anything, so I’m still reading off notes I’ve written all over my hands. The audience didn’t seem to mind. Even though I started out every joke with: “Hands sure are funny, aren’t they?” while staring intently at my palms…

February 24, 2003
Still preparing for my tour. Today I practiced my routine for my cats. They always have pages of notes for me. The critiques usually focus on why there aren’t more jokes about cats in my act. Why don’t I have a “Phone Call to a Cat” joke or a “What if Gloria Estefan was a cat” bit? I try to explain to them that my audience does not usually consist of cats, but they feel that I’m limiting myself. Maybe they’re right…

February 28, 2003
My tour stops in 24 cities. All in six days. I’m a little skeptical about the time frame, but my manager assures me (during strange prolonged laughing fits) that it can be done.
On March 29th, I’ll be performing at the Verizon Wireless Theatre in Houston. Despite it’s name, I’ve been promised that the building isn’t actually wireless. Which is a relief because that’s how electricity works.
I guess these days, big companies are naming stadiums and theaters all around the country. They could take it one step further and call it the "Verizon Wireless One Month Free Unlimited Minutes Theatre," but that might be too long to print on a ticket…


March 2, 2003
Today is the day I start learning all about the cities I’m visiting on my tour. It’s so important to connect with the crowds at my shows. When I take the stage I want to say more than just: “It’s great to be here in (insert your city here)! With the intensive research I’ve been doing, I’ll be able to open with: “Hello Kansas City! Did you know that your annual relative humidity is 60%? You guys ROCK!!”

March 7, 2003
I leave tomorrow, so I guess It’s time for me to think about what I’m going to bring. When I’m on tour I usually travel with about 15 steamer trunks. The hardest part is figuring out what I’ll wear for each show. Should I wear a pair of pants? Or should I wear pants instead? I weigh the options. Pants? Or Pants? Then I realize, I’m usually most comfortable on stage in pants. Still, bringing along some pants is probably a good idea. Just in case I change my mind…

March 9 - Luther Burbank Center, Santa Rosa CA
Well, I’ve finally hit the road. I just finished up two shows in Santa Rosa, California. Both shows were sold out! The show’s really starting to take shape. The best part was that the audience was definitely laughing with me, and not at me, which for a comedian is pure gold.

The staff at Luther Burbank Center were so accommodating. The theater had a very nice Green Room. “Green Room” is a fancy showbiz term for a backstage waiting area. It’s not actually green. But no one dares ever mentions it. Not if they want to keep their jobs.

The room was appointed with my few paltry requirements: just a big bathroom, a comfy couch, and a kiln, in case I want to calm my pre-show jitters by fashioning an urn. Next, it’s on to Yakima, Washington. See you there…


March 11 - Capitol Theatre, Yakima, WA
I was a little nervous about performing in Yakima. It’s a pretty small town. Very quaint. I didn’t know if they’d accept a city girl like me, coming in with my fancy city ways. I couldn’t have been more wrong. The people of Yakima (Yakimites, as I now call them) were so warm and kind and polite. And they love to laugh. I’m now putting Yakima on my list of top 10 favorite cities. Will your city be next?

March 14 - Kansas City, MO
Arrived in Kansas City late last night. Checked into my hotel under my usual alias “Nelle Sereneged,” but the hotel clerk wasn’t fooled by my little charade. He said “But Miss DeGeneres that’s just your name backwards.” With my cover blown, I hastily checked in as Gwyneth Paltrow, only to notice Gwyneth waiting to check in right behind me. What are the odds?!

March 18 -Grand Junction and Colorado Springs, CO.
I loved performing at Kansas City’s Midland Theater, a beautiful old building built in 1927. Sammy Davis Jr., and Dolly Parton have played there, so I guess it was only a matter of time before I did. Then it was on to Grand Junction, Colorado and Colorado Springs. Both shows were a delight.

Have I mentioned my opening act? My friend Karen Kilgariff is traveling with me for the entire tour. Karen is also the head writer for my new talk show. She’s been doing an amazing job warming-up the crowds.

Having a warm-up act is kind of like having your own personal food taster. Karen bravely goes out there to see if the crowd is good, and if they aren’t, I don’t go on. Instead, I am whisked out the backdoor to the safety of a cozy neighborhood bistro…

March 19 – Colorado to Seattle
I’m writing this as we drive through the frozen tundra of Colorado towards an airport that might be open so I can get to Seattle for a 7:30 show. There was a huge snowstorm; most of the roads are closed. We’ve been driving in the storm for two hours and have a couple more to go. We’re all hungry, but there is not one store or restaurant open. Oh yeah, the life of an entertainer is truly glamorous.

The Denver show was canceled because no one could get to the theater in a blizzard. I’ll be back in Denver March 26th, hopefully the weather will cooperate. Getting to the show was no problem for me. My hotel was right across the street, but I guess other people live farther away. To pass the time during the storm, Karen and I have been gambling, playing cards and pool hustling.

Actually, I heard that a few expeditions did try to make the trek to the Denver show, but most had to turn back. A five-person team from Argentina had trained for six grueling months for the event, but their spirit was not broken and they vow to make it to the rescheduled March 26th show.

So here we are driving along, Karen, my assistant, my tour manager and Lewis my choreographer. We’ve got to make it to Seattle.

Of course since we’re all from L.A. where a cold snap means high 60’s, none of us have warm enough clothes on. I’m the only one who had the foresight to wear socks.

I’m getting a little concerned. I see cars on the side of the road abandoned by their owners. If we break down, I have a back-up plan to go by dog sled. I’ve been systematically collecting dogs and other animals along the way to assemble a “team.” So far we’ve picked up two dogs, one squirrel and something that could be a hedgehog or a possum. I’m not sure. But if he can pull, he’s in.

If the dog sled idea doesn’t pan out, I don’t know what we’re going to do. I don’t know how to build an igloo or prepare whale blubber.

We just spotted a sign for the airport! We made it and we’re on our way to Seattle. As soon as my feet thaw out, I’ll let you know how the show went…

Later that night, at the Paramount Theatre in Seattle
We made it in the nick of time. After using several modes of transportation including a car, plane, and finally a collapsible canoe (that I had wisely purchased just in case), we arrived safely in Seattle.

It was all so worth it.

The Seattle show went so incredibility well that I’ve become giddy. I love the people of Seattle, every single one of them. But I especially adore the people that came to my show tonight. Being on stage and making people laugh is really an amazing feeling. I wish I could explain it. I wish I could book all of you reading this into select venues across the country. Then you’d know.

I’ve just been informed that we’ve got to go. Yes, after spending a total of about four hours in Seattle we’re now headed for Vancouver. I’ll miss you Seattle. Thank you for making it my best show yet!

March 21- Orpheum Theatre, Vancouver, BC.
I was very excited to perform in Canada again. I mean it's a whole different country. Learning about new cultures is so interesting. It's very important when visiting other countries to at least try to speak their language. During my set I made sure to pronounce "about" as "aboot." It's key to winning over Canadian audiences.

Had a really terrific set. The show just keeps getting better and better. I was paid in Canadian dollars, which I love, because their currency is so much prettier than ours. When I get around to it, I've got to figure out the exchange rates.

Went to dinner after the show and sampled one of Canada's local specialties: nachos. At least that's what they told us.

March 22 - Schnitzer Concert Hall, Portland Oregon
Well, I'm back in the United States of America, in a beautiful city called Portland. It's taken a bit of getting used to, after my whirlwind international experience.

I've been on the road for almost two weeks now. I miss my animals. I wanted to bring them along, but then my "posse" would include mostly cats and dogs. I think a "posse" is considered cooler if it's primarily people.

I think the crowds at the Schnitzer (which might win the award for the funniest sounding concert hall in the country) had a really good time. They laughed and made that sound with their hands, that has become to be known as "clapping". All in all, it was a real success.

Gotta wrap this up, we head out to San Francisco in the morning and I'm going to need about 12 hours of sleep so I can make it up those hills.

March 24, Davies Symphony Hall, San Francisco, CA

I always love visiting San Francisco. I lived here many, many years ago, when I was a penniless stand-up comic just starting my career.

I took a cable car to see where I used to live. It’s amazing, as you get older, how much smaller everything seems. Turns out, my old apartment was actually a medium sized storage locker - complete with a combination lock on the door. I’ve come such a long way.

For lunch I ate all the famous local foods, all at once. Rice-o-Roni, (the San Francisco treat) Ghirardelli chocolate, sourdough bread and a refreshing glass of wheat grass juice.

Afterwards, I felt a little queasy, so I clipped on my safety rope and made the steep assent back to my hotel.

My show was at Davies Symphony hall. A perfect place for comedy, because symphonies are always so damn funny. I came prepared. In case the crowd demanded a tune, I was going to bring my autoharp with me onstage. But my advisers, advised me not to. Probably good advice.

The crowd was great, so the show went great. That’s really the way it works at a stand-up show. If the audience is enthusiastic and energized, then the show can be incredible. What I’m saying is, that it’s all up to you. I’ve got nothing to do with it.

March 25 - Davies Symphony Hall, San Francisco,CA

Spent all day shooting promotional spots for my upcoming HBO special. It was a very hectic day. If it wasn’t for my assistant “Sweeney” I don’t know what I’d do. “Sweeney” is not his real name. He doesn’t want me to use his real name because he’s also the assistant for other well-known people. He’s a very busy man. That’s why he has his own assistant, Sheldon (It’s unfortunate, but that is his real name) to assist him. “Sweeney” is always on top of everything. Sometimes he’ll tell me that I’m hungry. And I swear that I’m not. But he insists. You know what? He’s always right.

We shot the spots in and around Union Square and got a bunch of people just walking by to appear on camera. There are a lot of “interesting“ people in San Francisco, and now we have the tape to prove it.

Through out a day of shooting I am constantly being checked for flaws. One person touches up my makeup, another checks the PH balance of my hair, while another makes sure that the buttons on my shirt are secure. In the “business” these people are called
“button wranglers.” It can all drive you a little crazy, but it’s the price of fame.

Be sure to watch for the promo spots on HBO, if you don’t have HBO, could you please get it? You’ll like it, it’s not TV, it’s HBO.

Then after a full day of shooting it was off to another show at Davies. And yet again, the audience exceeded my expectations! Now it’s back to snowy Denver. I’ll write again soon…

March 26 Buell Theatre, Denver, CO.

Back in Denver, making up the March 18th show that got canceled because of a huge snowstorm. It's funny, the audience tonight at the Buell were just the opposite of snow. They were not cold or flaky, but warm and welcoming. I didn't even have to go into 4-wheel drive to get through my performance.
It's starting to snow again, so we're hightailing it to Texas. See you there!

March 27 Majestic Theatre, San Antonio, TX
Have I mentioned lately that I love my fans? Well, I do. If I can, it's always my pleasure to sign a few autographs or pose for a quick snapshot. But sometimes, I'm honestly too busy.

Like tonight in San Antonio. I was leaving the show and already late to catch my plane to Dallas. There was a crowd of people waiting for me, wanting autographs. But I couldn't miss my plane. Now, I don't care who you are -- if you're late for a plane, you've missed
the boat, (or in this case, plane). I HAD to go. When I didn't stop to sign their pictures, some people got pretty upset. It made me feel badly, because I want to make my fans happy whenever I can. But sometimes it's just not possible.

Could you do me a favor if you ever see me? If you ask for an autograph or picture with me, and I tell you that I can't, will you trust me? I'll promise to do the same for you, when I'm asking for your autograph. Deal?


March 29 - Verizon Wireless Theatre, Houston, TX.

My mom called today to check in and see how I am.
She loves hearing each and every detail about my shows. And she loves Sean Connery.

MOM: Hi Honey, how are the shows going? Did Sean Connery think you’re funny?

ME: I don’t know Mom, I don’t know if he’s even seen the show.

MOM: Do you think he might?

ME: I don’t know Mom, maybe.

MOM: Okay dear, let me know when he does. Talk to you soon.

Well, time to get ready for the show. For my sake, I hope a certain distinguished Scotsman’s in the audience tonight. Keep your fingers crossed.

March 30 Majestic Theatre, Dallas, TX.
It’s my last night in the Lone Star State. You know, what they say about Texas is true. Everything is bigger. The food portions, the hats, the bed linen thread counts. Remember that TV show ‘Walker, Texas Ranger’? That was HUGE. I rest my case.

Okay, here’s more proof that everything’s bigger in Texas. You know those teeny tiny miniature shampoo bottles you get in hotels? In Texas they come in five-gallon jugs -- which makes stealing them a logistical nightmare. Whenever I tour, I always take the little shampoo bottles as a souvenir. I have a collection of them at home in a beautiful antique display cabinet. It’s always a great conversation starter. The conversations often start like this: “Uh Ellen, don’t you think it’s incredibly weird that you have a collection of tiny hotel shampoo bottles in a beautiful antique display cabinet?” At that moment, I usually make a mental note not to show my prized collection of mini-conditioners…

April 1 -- Spreckles Theatre, San Diego, CA
To mix things up a bit, tonight I did the show at the Spreckles Theatre entirely in the nude…

April Fools! Sorry, had to do it. Actually, the San Diego show was a blast, and that’s no joke. And I wore pants.

Spent most of the day before the show, hanging around my hotel room, writing a new chapter for my book. And by “new chapter,” I mean I haven’t started yet.

It was so hard to start writing my first book. I hope this time it’ll be easier. I’m still working out the title. I’m thinking of calling it: “This Book Writes Itself” and then hopefully it will, so I can go take a nice long nap. Next stop Phoenix…

April 2 Dodge Theatre, Phoenix, AZ
Each night, at the end of the show, I’ve been doing a little Q & A section with the audience.
It’s fun, and since I’ve been talking nonstop, it’s nice to give somebody else a chance. The questions often range from people wanting to know what’s the status of my latest projects all the way to what I think the molecular structure is of certain kinds of cheese. Not all the questions I can answer. But I always try. Sometimes I even learn something…

Like tonight, during the Q & A at the Dodge Theater, a woman in the audience suggested I do more jokes about playgrounds. That was her question. It wasn’t actually a question. It was more like a gentle demand. Was she mulling it over the entire show? “Hmm, I’m really enjoying Ellen’s new show, but there’s something missing. I can’t put my finger on it. Ah, yes, playgrounds! My God! She hasn’t mentioned them once!”

Now, I think playgrounds are as hilarious as the next person, but I never realized there was such an incredible demand for jokes about children’s outdoor recreation facilities. In actuality, they really are a veritable bottomless pit of comedic possibilities.

So, I promised her that I would write a few jokes about playgrounds in my tour diary. My only hope is that she finds them satisfactory.

Here goes…

Boy, playground equipment sure have some funny names, don’t they? Like the jungle gym. Why is it called that? I personally wouldn’t want my child playing in the jungle. Jungles can be extremely dangerous! What’s next? “The Quicksand Box”? The “Malaria Monkey Bars”? Who’s with me?!

Okay, and while we’re at it, what’s up with Monkey Bars? Why are there drinking establishments that cater only to monkeys? That’s just wrong!

Okay, that’s it for now, but I could go on and on and on…

April 4-6 -- Wiltern Theatre, Los Angeles

Just finished up the shows in Los Angeles. It was a welcome change to work three consecutive nights at one place. We even had a wrap-party. Everybody showed up: the lighting and sound technicians, set designer (who chooses the barstool that appears with me on stage) costume designer, my stunt double, my body double, my stand-in and the water and batboy. A good time was had by all.

The Wiltern Theater is incredibly beautiful. It was originally called the Historic Wiltern when it was built in 1931. Now it’s just called the Wiltern Theater -- without the historic. Why would they have called a building that was just built historic, anyway? Would you call a brand new restaurant Ye Old T.G.I. Friday's? I think not.

Next stop: Columbus, Ohio. I’ll write soon…


April 10 -- Palace Theatre, Columbus, OH
Had a splendid show at the Palace Theater and then back to my hotel room to get some rest.

I am getting so used to living in hotels now. They’re like a second home to me. I’m trying to organize a block party on my floor, but so far no one has responded to my flyer…

April 11 -- State Theatre, Minneapolis, MN

Is it okay if I turn my tour diary into an advice column for a moment? I’m the one who needs the advice. Here’s my letter:

Dearest Website Reader,

Hi, my name is Ellen and I’m currently doing a stand-up comedy tour around the U.S. I ran into an uncomfortable situation last night that I didn’t quite know how to handle. I was eating a fried calamari appetizer in a restaurant (That’s not what made me uncomfortable. There’s nothing wrong with eating calamari, fried or otherwise. If you think there’s something wrong with eating calamari, then you’re not going to be able to help, because you’ll be focusing on that instead of my question. So if you can, please, please, put aside all of your prejudices and preconceived notions about “calamari eaters” before you continue reading.) I was eating the calamari with my fingers. (Again, if you have a problem with people eating food with their fingers you might not be able to be objective. Fried calamari can be considered a finger food therefor society does not frown on eating it with your fingers. Or even, for that matter, my fingers.)

Anyway, a nice gentleman recognized me and put his hand out for me to shake. He didn’t offer me much of a choice -- he just stuck it out there. Let me preface this by saying I always wash my hands before eating. It’s a habit, and not a bad one in my opinion. So, if I shook this man’s hand I felt like I couldn’t go back to enjoying my food with out washing my hands again. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’m Howard Hughes or anything. I don’t cover my soup with tissue paper to ward of germs and I always trim my toenails at proper intervals. But what IF this man didn’t have the habit of washing his hands before dining? I didn’t want to be rude and not shake his hand, but at the same time I didn’t want have to get up in the middle of my meal and wash my hands again. What do you think would be a graceful way, in the future, to deal with this situation?

~Finger Lickin’ Good in Minneapolis


April 12 Chicago Theatre, Chicago, IL
What a night! Chicago IS a toddlin’ town--whatever that means. Nice town, Chicago. I’m so glad the theater was called the Chicago Theater -- for once I knew where I was.

Walked around during the day and did some shopping on State Street (That great street. At least according the song. It’s unclear to me what “great street” actually means. It could mean it’s a big street (which it is) or, that it’s just a better than average street. If the guy who wrote the song weren’t dead, I’d ask him.)

April 15 Tower Theatre, Philadelphia, PA
Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had a home cooked meal? When you’re on the road you eat every meal out. Every one. All I want to do is make myself a tuna-melt and eat it standing up in my kitchen. I almost never order room service when I’m touring because it’s hard to justify eating a ten-dollar boiled egg.

My next stop is: (In Jeopardy question form)
What is the capital of the United States?

April 16-17 Lisner Auditorium, Washington, D.C.
Heading out of Washington after doing two great shows.
I’m so proud of the crowds in D.C. They had everything I look for in an audience: They were well groomed, polite, attentive, and they let me do all the talking. My tour manager is telling me it’s time to get on the plane. I’m making him a little nervous because I’m ignoring him. He’s getting mad. He’s not the boss of me! Oh wait, I think in this case he is. See you in Boston…

April 19 Orpheum Theatre, Boston, MA
Had a great time at the show in Boston. Part of the success of tonight I owe to my new warm-up exercises. Before the show, Karen and I sit back stage and do deep knee bends, yoga, Pilate’s and intense deep breathing. After about 2 minutes of that, we move on to positive affirmations:

You’re so funny Ellen.
No, you are Karen.
No, you are Ellen.
No, you.
No, you.
No, you…


This goes on for a quite a while, until Karen goes out and starts the show…


April 20 Symphony Hall, Atlanta, GA

As you might know, I hail from the South, so it’s a pleasure to be back on familiar turf. Atlanta is one of the friendliest towns around. Everything’s: yes ma’am and no ma’am. My favorite is “y’all” (which I still use). It’s such an economical way to talk. “Y’all goin’?” is so much easier to say than “Are you presently considering departing?”

Went to a Krispy Kreme donuts. The woman behind the counter was amazingly pleasant. In L.A. if you go into a store it’s a completely different experience. At the end a purchase you say, “Thank you for letting me shop in your store.” To which the shop person usually replies, “Whatever.” It’s nice to be home.

April 21-- Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater, FL

Today I decided to get some exercise in the hotel gym. I did about 30 minutes on the treadmill -- it's so boring. I try to make it more exciting by pretending someone is chasing me. It must look pretty weird. People walking by always give me funny looks. It could be because I’m screaming “Leave me alone damn you, leave me aloooone!!” as I run…Who knows?

A
pril 23 -- Kravis Center, West Palm Beach, FL
Florida is a beautiful state. My hotel room has a view of the ocean. It’s about 77 degrees and I’m drinking a big glass of Florida orange juice. I would love to go swimming, but I didn’t bring a bathing suit. I think the hotel management might frown on me entering the pool ‘au natural.’ I suppose it can’t hurt to ask…

April 24-- Landmark Theatre, Syracuse, NY
The HBO taping is getting really close. (Oh, by the way, I’m going to be on Letterman on Tuesday April 29!) I’m putting the finishing touches on my act. Getting a joke perfect takes patience. One word can make or break a joke. Let’s do a quick comedy workshop.

Take this old joke for example:

Just flew in from Houston, and boy are my ankles tired.

Can you see how this joke could be improved?
Just changing one word can do the trick:

Just flew in from Kalamazoo, and boy are my ankles tired.


See? Kalamazoo is much funnier than Houston, because it has that hard “K” sound that almost guarantees huge laughs. Now, try it yourself. Use words like crouton, Canarsie and kumquat in conversation and you’ll be the hit of any social occasion.

I’ll write soon!

April 26 -- Massey Hall, Toronto, ONT.
Well, back on the plane again. Being in a different city every night is getting kinda wearing.
So much packing and unpacking. By the time I’ve put everything away it’s time to go. I do make sure to keep each room I stay in neat and tidy. The whole “trashing” thing isn’t really my style. I like to leave a little something behind instead to make the room just a little bit nicer. Sometimes I leave a houseplant. Or, as I did in my hotel in Toronto, I repainted the bathroom. I chose a charming French Blue, which I then “ragged” over with a vibrant Victorian Red. I sure hope the hotel management appreciates it.

April 27 -- Benedum Center, Pittsburgh, PA
I’ve been on the road now for almost two full months and today I finally got around to writing some postcards. Now if I just had time to get stamps; maybe I’ll get them when I’m back in Los Angeles. I wanted to see the Andy Warhol Museum (he was born in Pittsburgh) but didn’t have time, so I just popped into a local super market and contemplated the Campbell’s Soup section. It’s the best that I could do.

April 28 -- State Theatre, New Brunswick, NJ
The show was sold out - what a great night! Next stop is New York City to tape my HBO special at the Beacon Theatre May 1 and 2nd.

I can’t believe it--I’ve done my Here and Now show 35 times. I’m really psyched to go take a bite out of the Big Apple. In fact, I better check with my tour manager so he can arrange to have a large apple back stage that I can eat before the taping. Anyway, thanks so much to all of you who were at the State Theater tonight. New Jersey Rocks! See you in N.Y.C.

May 1-2 -- Beacon Theatre, New York, NY
Just finished taping the show for HBO. I can’t believe it - my stand-up tour is now officially over! It’s going to be hard to adjust to being home after living in hotel rooms for so long. When I get back to my house I’ll probably leave one of those "Do Not Disturb" signs on my front door, at least for the first couple of weeks.

The taping was done at the beautiful Beacon Theatre on Broadway. You know, they say the neon lights are bright on Broadway, and they’re right. Boy, are they ever.

One of the hardest parts of taping a show for me is deciding what I should wear. As you might know, I always wear pants when doing a live show. But when my performance is taped, I consider dressing up for the event. I laid out two outfits to choose from: pants and a loose comfortable shirt or a stunning Vera Wang strapless number. I feared that I might be self-consciously tugging on my dress all night, so I opted for the pants and shirt.

The HBO crew was terrific. They we’re so patient with me, even when I kept asking them over and over to make sure they had film in their cameras. Believe me, I was doing them a favor. I wouldn’t want to be the cameraman who had to say, "We’re so sorry Ellen, but could you possible do that again - from the top?" as I came offstage. Talk about egg on face.

Before the show I had a meeting with the director from HBO. The man has incredible insight to his craft. When I asked him, "What’s my motivation?", he thought for a moment, and then responded simply, but with great conviction, "Be funny." Let me tell you, those are two powerfully inspiring words. Well, actually his complete answer was "Look, I don’t have time for this. It’s a stand-up show, right? Just be funny for god’s sake." But I knew what he meant.

I hope for all of you who didn’t see me Here and Now tour, will tune into HBO when it airs Saturday, June 28th. If you did see me live, I hope you’ll watch anyway. Especially if your seats were far from the stage, as I am not as tiny as I seemed.

Thanks so much to all of you who’ve taken the time to read about my adventures on the road these past months!

And now, I’m going home.

Ellen
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