I know how to cheat at Tattslotto (1)
I got a great idea for a song
I know the truth about Marilyn Monroe (2)
I can prove Einstein's theory wrong

I can predict mankind's fate
I know where there's oil in Bass Straight (3)
All the deserts I could irrigate
All the poor I could emancipate

But that's not what motivates me
I'm interested in apathy
Apathy, apathy, apathy (x2)

I've got the cure for all known disease
I can make money grow on trees
I know how to stop terrorism
I know one of the guys in TISM

But that's not what motivates me
I'm interested in apathy
Apathy, apathy, apathy (x2)

But that's not what motivates me
None of this petty stuff for me
Not interested in pedantry
I'm interested in apathy
Apathy, apathy, apathy...

Well, here we are at the last verse
I've lost interest.

1. Tattslotto is lottery run by the Victorian-based Tattersall's lottery and gaming company.
2. Marilyn Monroe (1926-1962) was an American movie actress. There are any number of conspiracy theories about her death.
3. Bass Strait is the stretch of ocean separating Tasmania from mainlaind Australia.