Still Having Roommate Problems?? 51. Cry a lot. 52. Send secret admirer notes on your roommate's blitzmail. 53. Clip your fingernails and toenails and keep them in a baggie. Leave the baggie near your computer and snack from it while studying. If he/she walks by, grab the bag close and eye him/her suspiciously. 54. Paste used kleenexes to his/her walls. 55. Whenever your roomate comes in from the shower, lower your eyes and giggle to yourself. 56. If you get in before your roomate, go to sleep in his/her bed. 57. Put pornos under his/her bed. Whenever someone comes to visit your roommate when they're not home, show them the magazines. 58. Whenever you go to sleep, start jumping on your bed . . . do so for a while, then jump really high and act like you hit your head on the ceiling. Crumple onto your bed and fake like you were knocked out . . . use this method to fall asleep every night for a month. 59. If your roommate goes away for a weekend, change the locks. 60. Whenever his/her parents call and ask for your roommate, breathe into the phone for 5 seconds then hang up. 61. Whenever he/she goes to shower, drop whatever you're doing, grab a towel, and go shower too. 62. Find out your roommate's post office box code. Open it and take his/her mail. Do this for one month. After that, send the mail to him/her by UPS. 63. Collect all of your pencil shavings and sprinkle them on the floor. 64. Create an imaginary cat for a pet. Talk to it every night, act like you're holding it, keep a litter box under your desk. After two weeks, say that your cat is missing. Put up signs in your dorm, blame your roommate. 65. Call safety & security whenever your roommate turns up his/her music. 66. Follow him/her around on weekends. 67. Sit on the floor and talk to the wall. 68. Whenever the phone rings, get up and answer the door. 69. Whenever someone knocks, answer the phone. 70. Take his/her underwear. Wear it. 71. Whenever your roommate is walking through the room, bump into him/her. 72. Stare at your roommate for five minutes out of every hour. Don't say anything, just stare. 73. Tell your roommate that someone called and said that it was really important but you can't remember who it was. 74. Let mice loose in his/her room. 75. Give each of your walls a different name. Whenever you can't answer a problem, ask each of your walls. Write down their responses, then ask your ceiling for the final answer. Complain to your roommate that you don't trust your ceiling. 76. Take your roommate's papers and hand them in as your own. 77. Skip to the bathroom. 78. Take all of your roommate's furniture and build a fort. Guard the fort for an entire weekend. 79. Gather up a garbage bag full of leaves and throw them in a pile in his/her room. Jump in them. Comment about the beautiful foilage. 80. When you walk into your room, turn off your lights. Turn them on when you leave. 81. Print up satanic signs and leave them in your room where he/she can find them. 82. Whenever you're on the phone and he/she walks in, hang up immediately without saying anything and crawl under your desk. Sit there for two minutes than call whoever it was back. 83. Insist on writing the entire lyrics to American Pie on your ceiling above your bed. Sing them every night before you go to bed. 84. Use a bible as kleenex. Yell at your roommate if they say Jesus or God Damnit. 85. Burn incense. 86. Eat moths. 87. Buy Sea Monkeys and grow them. Name one after your roommate. Announce the next day that that one died. Name another one after your roommate. The next day say that it died. Keep this up until they all die. 88. Collect Chia-Pets. 89. Refuse to communicate in anything but sign language. 90. Eat a bag of marshmellows before you go to bed. The next day, spray three bottles of whip cream all over your floor. Say you got sick. 91. Wipe deoderant all over your roommate's walls. 92. If you know that he/she is in the room, come barging in out of breath. Ask if they saw a fat bald naked Tibetan man run through carrying a hundred dollar bill. Run back out swearing. 93. Leave apple cores on his/her bed. 94. Keep feces in your fridge. Complain that there is never anything to eat. 95. Piss in a jar and leave it by your bed. When your roommate isn't looking, replace it with a jar of apple juice. Wait until your roommate turns around. Drink it. 96. Don't ever flush. 97. Buy an inflatable doll. Sleep with it. 98. Hang stuffed animals with nooses from your ceiling. Whenever you walk by them mutter, "You shouldn't have done that to me." 99. Lick him/her while they are asleep. 100. Dress in drag.