Hello, race fans, and welcome to Drum Talk with Phat Albert.Today's topic: To china or not to china (aka The China Syndrome).
One day, a chinese monk was out practicing his martial arts like he always did and off to his left were some kids playing with hand cymbals. Then suddenly a group of ninjas appeared - it seems one of the kids was the emperor's son and the ninjas wished to capture him for ransom. The monk, who was sworn to protect all aspects of the emperor flew into battle subduing the ninjas like Jackie Chan on speed. And in the process, one of the ninjas fell on a hand cymbal inverting it. The kids and the monk and the few remaining ninjas all just stopped and in unison remarked "Hey, that's a cool sound." Well, the monk won, obviously, and one of the kids there was named Wuhan, which thus spawned the Wuhan cymbal company that specializes in making chinas.
Chinas are good special application cymbals and should be used accordingly. They're not for everyone (some people just don't dig the sound man) but if you want to use one make sure you get one that sounds decent. Zildjain and Wuhan make some of the better cymbals right now but if you're a Paiste or a Sabian person, they occasionally make good ones too.
Remember, chinas are fun, but not for everyone so use them wisely and try not to piss too many people off by using them needlessly... wait 'til the music is really crankin' or you have a nice pop accent and you're looking for just the right sound to accentuate your drumming.
That's all for now, and don't forget the Phat Albert motto for good drumming: Higher, Faster, Louder... unless it's a freakin' ballad.
- WAS
Dear Albert,The other day my cat got into the ham and beans. Now he has kitty flatulence. I'm not talking about just breaking wind, here. He has enough thrust to put the space shuttle past jupiter. what should I do?
- "new gas co. on block"
Dear Gas Man,
Well, I'm not sure I'm completely qulified to help you on this issue, but if the cat happened to be a large black and white furball that answers to the name of Charlie, then might I suggest an extended visit to the backyard. Until such time that all of the space shuttles are safe from being randomly ejected from the Earth's atmosphere. Albert
- Albert
Dear Albert,yeah i have this problem women (particularly strippers) keep hitting on me i just feel so violated, now i have known you for years and i know you would not publish anything i write to you, so what should i do?????? i just keep going out with them but soehow i would just rather stay at home and not do anything how do i go about telling them i need my space? you friend "faster than aspeeding ticket"mw
- "Zman"
Yo Zman, what up?
A problem with strippers is a thing that I think most of my friends and I would like to have. But if they're buggin' ya, tell 'em ever so politely to back da fuck up. I mean you're only human, maybe that well known fact that you have a propensity for wearing women out in the bedroom has caught on to the strippers, who knows. Whatever happens do me a favor, don't catch anything you don't want, don't get married unless you're absolutely sure and definitely don't spend all of your money in one place. Albert
- Albert
This was added to the Tuba page to humor Albert. You would be correct in assuming that albert does not play the tuba. As one might assusme from reading the title of the page, Al is a drummer. And he's an old funky-ass dude.
If you just want to email Al, click the tenth word in this sentance.
