SEPARATED SINCE A FEW MONTHS


"I DID ALL I COULD TO SAVE MY MARIAGE"


It's never easy to separate, especially when there are children involved. Helmut Lotti had to announce his separation to his daughter Messalina. Having been touched himself by his parent's divorce, he chose to tell her the truth without any fuss.

Being the father of a beautiful six years old daughter, Messalina, Belgian singer Helmut Lotti who is 28, could only think about his career but the truth is that he has to face life and go through bad times like everybody else.

Usually discreet, Helmut agreed to give us this interview:
7J: Helmut, you are in the middle of many shows. How can you stand this infernal rhythm ?

HL: I feel very good. I'm in good shape even if I perform many concerts. I do take care of my health. I exercise. I sleep enough and I eat well.

7J: The Belgian's newspapers mentioned your recent separation with your wife. Does it bother you ?

HL: They only do their job. After all it is my fault. When I started at the age of 19, I was innocent to believe that doing interviews about my love life and posing with my wife would have of no consequences. Back then, I even thought it was amusing. But when our separation got known, I didn't think it was amusing anymore.

7J: Do you regret it ?

HL: No, I think that in life, we have to live with the consequences of our actions and decisions.

7J: At which time did you feel that your ex-wife and you were getting closer to getting separated ?

HL: A long time ago. I tried really hard to save our relationship. I tried many times to bring back harmony in our married life, but it was impossible.

7J: Did the problems between you two come from your career?

HL: That's what everybody thinks, but that's not it. I need a woman that loves me, not a woman that says she loves me.

7J: At which time did you know it was too late ?

HL: I would rather not talk about this aspect of my private life. Although my occupation is exceptional, I live a normal life comparable to everybody. A failed love life is an experience that a lot of people have or will have.

7J: Were you worried about Messalina, your daughter, when she would learn that her parents would separate ?

HL: No, for the simple reason that I lived through the same experience when I was a child. So I did not have any worries about that because I knew how to do it. I also think I did it correctly.

7J: How did you do it ?

HL: Clear and simple. I told her: "Suppose that you have a little friend in school with whom you always had fun. What would you do if your friend wasn't nice with you and would start pulling your hair". She immediately answered: "I would find another friend that would be more nice". It's at that moment that I told her that her mother was not in love with me anymore and that instead of arguing all the time it was better that we separate.

7J: Did your explanation reassure her ?

HL: Yes. the most important thing in all of this is that she knows that we both love her unconditionally. Her mother and I will always be her mom and dad until we die.

7J: Did you suffer when your parents separated ?

HL: No, not really. I learned a lot through that experience.

7J: What did you learn from this ?

HL: Responsibility, because my mom was alone to raise us and on weekends, me and my little brother would take over.

7J: We often believe that children from divorced family have serious trouble. Are you in agreement with this statement?

HL: Of course, children would prefer that their parents stay together. But if parents keep arguing and it is becoming irreconcilable, the separation is necessary. If there is no more love, the man and woman should not stay together just for their children. When the child leaves home, the couple is left with a marriage that shouldn't have been in the first place.

7J: With that change in your life, does that mean you will only devote your time to your career ?

HL: No. I have a private life and I wish to protect it. I do not want to discuss it openly with reporters. If I fall in love again, I do not want her to be known by everybody. I would like her to live normally. Unfortunately, if that new relationship fails, it would probably be in the magazines again.

7J: Are your mother and father there for you during this difficult time ?

HL: Yes. Although, I do not really need moral support. It was actually the previous months before the separation that were difficult. When we finally made the decision, it was actually liberating. The stress which was very present at the time is gone.

7J: Do you think that time will fix everything ?

HL: Yes, I will be in love again one day because I do believe in eternal love, the one that stays strong in spite of all the years that it goes through.

7J: Do you have an idea of the perfect woman ?

HL: I imagine her very nice and with a good sense of humor. I also like a woman that cooks well (laughter).

7J: Do you think you will find her in show business ?

HL: Not really. I love people that are simple, natural, intelligent and that knows to keep both feet on the ground. One thing is certain. I do not want to stay single my whole life (laughter).


Transcribed by: Helene Joly from The Official Helmut Lotti Page Bulletin Board


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