| Author |
Subject |
Cellochick
Registered User
(3/29/01 6:44:34 pm)
Reply
 |
Lack of
inspiration...HELP!
Grrrrr...I DESPISE these low, low,
low periods in my life. School is closing in on me, the walls are
spinning, and I'm getting paranoid. I'm losing my focus and I'm
losing my inspiration. All I want to do is sleep all day. I still
love cello, of course, but it's getting more and more difficult to
find energy at the end of the day for some quality practice. My
teacher is not being very complimentary right now, and I feel like
I'm just spiraling downwards. Where am I going? I'm really starting
to doubt myself and my abilites. How can I feel better? I'm going to
cry...I need inspiration! Quotes, stories, ballads, epic poems,
throw it all at me. Maybe something will spark a part of my
exhausted mind.
|
Paul
Tseng ICS Staff 
Administrator
(3/29/01 6:59:42 pm)
Reply
 |
Re:
Lack of inspiration...HELP!
Hey CelloChick,
I know how
you feel. All I can tell you is that despite all evidence to the
contrary, you will survive this. One day, in retrospect you'll be
able to laugh at these times.
Better times are ahead. Don't
put too much of your self worth in things that people can judge
(like grades, your cello playing, etc.). These are all just things
that you do, not who you are.
You are a human BEing, not a
human DOing.
Are your auditions over now? Are you
experiencing an after audition/concert letdown? It's all very
natural for this to happen. If not, then take a short break and then
get back to work!
If you are looking for some inspiration
check this site out: Daily Wisdom
Senior year burnout is tough, but you WILL survive,
though. I promise! 
Paul Tseng
My Website
Alexander's website
MP3!
Edited by: Paul
Tseng ICS Staff at: 3/29/01 6:59:42 pm
|
Bobbie
Registered User
(3/29/01 7:59:29 pm)
Reply |
Re:
Lack of inspiration...HELP!
I don't know about inspiration, but
what you describe sounds like clinical depression. It's sometimes
tough to differentiate between the "normal" emotions of high school
and real depression, but the latter is not uncommon, and is highly
treatable. Tell your parents that you might be depressed and that
you need to see a therapist. Real depression is tough to fix on your
own.
|
Zaraak
Registered User
(3/29/01 8:37:16 pm)
Reply
 |
Lack of
inspiration... or depression?
This is also what I thought when I
first read this message. It's difficult to really tell through this
medium (internet) and I wasn't sure if cellochick was just having a
rant. If these feelings are persistant though you really should see
someone.
Greg
Edited by: Zaraak
at: 3/29/01 8:37:16 pm
|
drcello
Registered User
(3/29/01 10:06:25 pm)
Reply | Edit
 |
The
cure
Quick! Stop being a grind, and
forget the whole mess, and just go do something fun. Take a cold
shower. Kiss a dog's nose. Eat a goldfish. Evangelize strangers. Go
fishing. Eat a hot dog with sauerkraut. Find someone who needs help,
and help him/her. Stick your head out the window and scream. Play a
trick on somebody. Eat a bug. "This too shall pass."
Marshall C. St. John
drcello@mindspring.com
Cello Heaven
|
rexmeow
Registered User
(3/29/01 10:25:23 pm)
Reply |
Re:
Lack of inspiration...HELP!
Do you get these feelings alot? I'll
have to agree with two of the replies if you feel this way a bit.I
have depression myself, but I found a way to deal with it myself
without having to see a doctor yet. When I'm not injured from
biking, I bike, skate, or hike. Exercise is suppose to help out
depression, biking alot of miles helps me out, its a stress releaser
also.Sometimes I play piano for hours to let out my emotion. If I'm
having a bad mood day and don't feel like touching any of my
instruments,I won't ,otherwise I feel forced.Crying is a good
release sometimes.But all this doesn't work for everybody. Sometimes
I pick a beautiful cello,violin, or piano piece and play it out.
There is lots of things to do, depends on the person. Ever need to
talk it out or more tips heres my email rexmeow@bicycling.com, I do
understand the depression feeling.Some of my old friends take
anti-depressants, I think the alcohol they drink thou cancels those
out since it is a depressant.Sometimes changing your diet helps,
some people get depressed if they eat certain foods.
|
Guambaby
Registered User
(3/30/01 2:34:10 am)
Reply |
Re:
Lack of inspiration...HELP!
I totally know what you are going
through. When I was in highschool it was just as you are describing.
Everything seemed out of control... the walls seemed to spin and
close in on me, people would talk and I didn't understand what they
were saying, it was like it was in a different language. I didn't
really feel that I had anyone to turn to because I didn't have a
good relationship with my parents at the time. I used to cry and
pray that it would just end... but it didn't. I had a teacher
though, who took me under her "wing" and spent extra time with me.
She did tell my parents what I was going through, and I didn't feel
betrayed because she was doing something that I know needed to be
done, yet I couldn't seem to do it myself. But the one thing that
made it all better for me then and now, was the fact that I started
going to church. Once I had a relationship with my Father, I
wondered how I ever let things bother me like that.
Yes, I
know that there are cases of clinical depression and stuff, but it
never hurts to go to church.
|
cellochris99
Registered User
(3/30/01 5:19:18 am)
Reply |
inspiration from friend
I've been where you are many times.
I've noticed that, at least in my life, that these are the times
that God is desiring you to spend some time alone with him in prayer
or in silence. God isn't concerned at all about your eloquent
prayers, he just wants your love and for you to seek him. I always
make a point to thank him for the many gifts and blessings that he's
given in my life. There's a whhoooole lot of people out there in the
world that really have it bad, and there's always someone who's
hurting much, much more. I desperately pray for those people. Many,
many children never have any of the priveledges that you and I
enjoyed so freely each day as children, that's sad but very true.
Some people don't even have a family to speak of
. Not even a church to go to
, much less a chance to aqquire and enjoy musical accomplishment
. It could've been any of us.
I believe that it REALLY
pleases God when we actually care enough to pray, not just for
ourselves, but for others. I'll always feel a renewed enthusiasm for
life as a result. This is just what I sincerely believe in my own
experience.
Chris
|
mycatmarti
Registered User
(3/30/01 8:15:38 am)
Reply |
lack of
inspiration
It's hard to be inspired if you're
suffering from depression. And it sounds like chronic depression.
Help is available. But first, get your thyroid checked. It also
sounds like an underactive thyroid. I've been at both places in my
life, successfully found help for both. Please talk to a doctor or
someone though.
Mia
|
mcello
Registered User
(3/30/01 8:44:10 am)
Reply |
Take
some time for yourself
Unless you feel this constantly, I
agree that its just that time of year for a student! Even though I'm
30+ years old, as a student this is just a tough time of year. The
paper deadlines are ahead, cello teachers are getting demanding
because juries, auditions, etc., and my students are also getting
ready for spring recitals! I admit I thought I was going to have a
nervous breakdown a couple of days ago. But the thing that helped
most was that I realized yesterday that I hadn't done anything for
myself in weeks and I just left campus for an hour, forgot the
homework, practicing, etc. and did what I wanted! I was a new person
afterwards. Give yourself a break, it will pay off in the long
run!
|
Martine
M 
Registered User
(3/30/01 11:51:40 am)
Reply |
Perhaps
this will help....??
Hi everyone,
I know exactely
how awful those periods are
. But what often helps me is going to a concert (by a
symphony-orchestra, for example), talking to fellow musicians about
the pieces you love and reading interviews with musicians. The one
IRC had with Zara Nelsova (who was my teachers teacher
) is an inspiration for me. Anyways, good luck with it, try to
remember the good times you played and not the thousand failures
everyone makes each day
!!
With love and best wishes, Martine.
|
Peter
D
Registered
User
(3/30/01 2:48:25 pm)
Reply |
As deep
as Austrialia...
Did someone mention
poetry?
To the Moon
Art thou pale for weariness
Of
climbing heaven and gazing on the earth,
Wandering
companionless
Among the stars that have a different birth,
-
and ever changing, like a joyless eye
That finds no object
worth its constancy?
You may also want to look into P.B.
Shelley's 700 lines of easy reading regarding the companionless
Sensitive Plant:
A Sensitive Plant in a garden grew,
And
the young winds fed it with silver dew,
And it opened its
fan-like leaves to the light,
And closed them beneath the kisses
of Night....
Also, Shelley's best work, written in Italy just
before he drowned, "Lines written in the bay of
Lerici."
...She left me and I stayed alone
Thinking over
every tone
Which, though silent to the ear,
The enchanted
heart could hear,
Like notes which die when born, but
still
Haunt the echoes of the hill;...
(Having read
the poem, I had my parents drive a few hours out of their way, so
that we could visit the bay of Lerici, when we traveled to
Italy.)
|
raymcc85
Registered User
(3/30/01 11:35:37 pm)
Reply |
Re:
Lack of inspiration...HELP!
I'm not too swift with psychology,
so I'll not comment on depression. I'm also not a big believer so
I'll leave religion out. But I do know the feelings you describe. I
used to have them too. I have one bit of inspiration and a couple of
words of advice. First the advice: Anyone who believes she or he can
create and who dreams of creating (such as you do) often hits a wall
when dealing with those around her or him, particularly parents or
mentors. Trust them. But also know that it's okay to disagree with
them. I once was a creator of sorts (not in music, in which I'm a
hopeless novice), and I was pretty good at it. Part of my education
was learning confidence. Extreme confidence. The kind of confidence
a performer has to have to know that she or he will touch an
audience. Parents sometime don't understand this. Teachers sometime
don't know when to nurture it. But if you really have a desire to
follow music as a career, it's something you will learn. The process
is the confusing part and what I believe is causing your concern.
But the confusion passes. And remember, its a confusing time for
people around you too. Share with them your concerns and dreams. It
may not be what they want to hear, but they'll listen and they'll
help.
My suggestion for inspiration. Do something you really
love. I mean REALLY love. Something you don't do every day, either
(its gotta be super special. Make it your number one priority for
just one day and when it's over, write down why you love it and why
you want to create something as beautiful as that. Keep a journal
and remind yourself of your dreams. As long as your committed to
them, they'll inspire you.
I hope this didn't sound to
wishy-washy. It may be blather to some, but it was from my heart.
Keep writing and posting. Some of us very much want to hear about
how its going for you and want you to succeed.
cheers,
-r
|
Lucy
Clifford
Registered User
(3/31/01 12:52:52 am)
Reply |
Are you
preparing anything at the moment?
For auditions/recitals etc? If not,
just try taking a break, which sounds silly, but it isn't! Sometimes
when we're getting desperate it is just a sign that we need a rest,
be it from cello playing, astrophysics, translating the Iliad,
training for Athens 2004.......
If this is the case just
postpone your next lesson, and take a complete break from playing
music. Yes, put your cello/music/rockstop AWAY, and distract
yourself, mentally and physically. I think that we musicians often
forget that sometimes we need a holiday from music.
In my
third year of college there were about 2 months that were really
tough for me.....I had to learn two complete programmes for
assessment recitals, in the middle and at the end of the year.
I did really well in the half-year concert, but somehow the
thought of having to START ALL OVER AGAIN made me want to die. I was
really miserable, and my lessons and practice went nowhere, and then
I started thinking that I'd fail at the end of the year and I was
loosing practice time and....and....and......
After some
offers of counselling, which did no good, because the people,
although well meaning, were more used to people with anorexia, or
suicidal tendencies, or general mental malaise, rather than a
frustrated genius (JOKE) and couldn't quite understand the
musician's psyche, somebody from a pro orchestra said why didn't I
just take a break, which I did, for a fortnight. I went to
non-playing classes, and listened to music a lot, and went to
concerts and went jogging and played tennis a bit and had a really
brilliant two weeks. After that I was ready for
anything.
Practicing when you CAN'T practice is not only
unproductive, but doubley unproductive, because you actually go
backwards, which is why your lessons might not be going as well as
they might.
I don't know about your daily schedual, but have
you tried putting practice in the morning, or dividing it, so you
can get the hard slog done in the morning, and then have a bit of
fun at the end of the day? How much practice do you do per
day?
You could also try to make a 'Day of the Week' schedual,
and have a scales & etudes day, and a play-though day, and a
metrenome day. This still works for me, and it breaks up the tedium,
because, and let us face it, sometimes practice is
*tedious*.
Have you also thought about cutting down on your
practice. Try allocating 45 minutes per day, and think "this will be
correct at the end of 45 minutes". Be slow and systematic about it,
such as doing intonation excercises in your piece, or getting tempi
up by moving the metrenome one click faster per time. Not only is
this enjoyable, but the time goes fast, and leaves you wanting
more!
Because I don't know much about you I won't comment on
depression, and I've probably said too much about your day already.
Don't be too hasty in thinking about clinical depression, because
you seem to be functioning pretty well, which you couldn't do if you
had clinical depression, the coherence of your post rules out that
condition to me at least.
Anyway, take a break, and don't
despair 
|
zambocello
Registered User
(3/31/01 2:56:09 am)
Reply |
Different strokes
When I'm in a low way: nothng's fun,
no point in practicing, no point in getting up except to drag myself
to work, everyone's a jerk, etc, etc, I come around not by taking a
break, but by giving myself a new assignment. An assignment of my
choosing, of course. A new repertoire piece to learn, new book,
garden project, etc. Also, exercise is always a good remedy for just
about anything.
For comedic distraction, how's this one that
came in the mail today:
A woman awoke during the night to
find that her
husband was not in bed.She put on her robe and
went downstairs. He was sitting at the kitchen
table with a
cup of coffee in front of him. He
appeared to be in deep
thought, just staring at
the wall. She saw him wipe a tear from
his eye
and take a sip of his coffee.
"What's the matter
dear? Why are you down here
at this time of night?" she asked.
"Do you remember twenty years ago when we were
dating and
you were only 16?" he asked.
"Yes, I do," she replied.
"Do
you remember when your father caught us in
the back seat of my
car making love?"
"Yes, I remember."
"Do you remember when
he shoved that shotgun in
my face and said , 'Either you marry
my daughter
or spend twenty years in jail?"
"Yes, I do," she
said.
He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "
You
know...I would have gotten out today.
| |
Email This To a
Friend
Topic Commands
(Moderator only)
MP3
Resources 