MORE SIGNS YOU MIGHT JUST BE CANADIAN:

1. The words "about", "house" and "couch" sound fine until you go to
the US.
2. Cream Soda is PINK.
3. You drive a snowmobile to work or school.
4. Your cottage is in the same country you live in.
5. There is 3 downs in football.
6. You wonder what the Americans are thinking with the Imperial
system. (the rest of the world does too)
7. You know that 99% of Canadians have never seen a Polar Bear or
Penguin in the wild.
 

SIGNS YOU MAY BE A CANADIAN:

1. You stand in "line-ups" at the movie, not lines.
2. You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk"
3. You understand the phrase, "Could you please pass me a serviette,
I just spilled my poutine."
4. You eat chocolate bars instead of candy bars.
5. You drink pop, not soda.
6. You know what it means to be on 'pogey'.
7. You know that "a mickey" and "2-4's" mean "Party at the cabin,
eh!!"
8. You don't hold your hand on your breast when you sing the national
anthem.
9. You can drink legally while still a 'teen'.
10. You know that francophones, anglophones and allophones are not
electronic devices.
11. You talk about the weather with strangers and friends alike.
12. You don't know or care about the fuss with Cuba, it's just a
cheap place to travel to and has good cigars.
13. When there is a social problem, you turn to your government to
fix it instead of telling them to stay out of it.
14. You're not sure if the leader of our nation has EVER had sex and
don't want to know if he has!
15.You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
16. Pike is a type of fish, not some part of a highway.
17. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
18. You sit on a couch not a chesterfield - because Chesterfield is a
small town in Quebec.
19. You know what a Robertson screwdriver is.
20. You have Canadian Tire money.
21. You know that Thrills are something to chew and "taste like
soap".
22. You know that Mounties "don't always look like that."
23. You know that Canada is the only country to successfully invade
the US and burn its capital to the ground.
24. You voted for a political leader who admitted to smoking pot.
25. You read rather than scanned this list and looked for spelling
and grammatical errors.
 

SIGNS THAT YOU MIGHT BE TOO CANADIAN FOR YOUR OWN GOOD:

1. You play hockey 12 months a year.
2. You dismiss all beers under 6% alcohol content as "for children
and the elderly, and for export to the US".
3. You know that the Friendly Giant isn't a vegetable product line.
4. You know that Casey and Finnegan are not a Celtic musical group.
5. You remember when Alanis Morisette was "Too Hot To Hold".
6. You wonder why there isn't a 5 dollar coin yet and why we still
have pennies. (Australians don't.).
7. Your backpack has only one Canadian flag sewn on.
8. Unlike any international assassin/terrorist/spy in the world, you
probably don't have a Canadian passport, or if you do you can't find
it.
9. You know the French equivalents of "free", "prize" and "no sugar
added", thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal
packaging.
10. You are excited whenever an American television show mentions
Canada.
11. You make a mental note to talk about it at work the next day.
12. You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling
nauseous.
13. You know what a touque is and probably own one.
14. You have some memento of Doug and Bob.
15. You admit Rich Little is Canadian and you're glad Jerry Lewis is
not.
16. You know Toronto is not a province.
17. You drink Moosehead beer because of the moose.
18. You believe "the Canadian Conspiracy" should have won an Oscar.
19. You never miss "Coaches Corner".
20. Backbacon is a food group.
21. You laugh afterward at some U.S. citizens' lack of knowledge of
Canadian geography, but you are too polite to correct them.
22. You use a tennis ball more for road hockey and dog chasing than
for tennis.

THE BEST WAY TO FIND CANADIANS WHEN YOU ARE ABROAD:

Walk through any airport, bar or other public establishment while
abroad
and sing or whistle the "Hockey Night in Canada" theme song.-.without
exception, all Canadians within ear shot will respond...
 

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM CANADA WHEN...
1. You only know three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.
2. You design your Hallowe'en costume to fit over a snowsuit.
3. The mosquitoes have landing lights.
4. You have more miles on your snowblower than your car.
5. You have 10 favourite recipes for moose meat.
6. Canadian Tire on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at
Christmas.
7. You live in a house that has no front step, yet the door is one
meter above the ground.
8. You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.
9. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in
with snow.
10. You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with
only 8 buttons.
11. You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.
12. The local paper covers national and international headlines on 2
pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
13. At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing
plant.
14. The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
15. Your snowblower gets stuck on the roof.
16. You think the start of deer season is a national holiday.
17. You head south to go to your cottage.
18. You frequently clean grease off your barbeque so the bears won't
prowl on your deck.
19. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
20. The major parish fund-raiser isn't bingo it's sausage making.
21. You find -40C a little chilly.
22. The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freeze.
23. You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest
jewelry and your Sorels.
24. You can play road hockey on skates.
25. You know 4 seasons: Winter, Still Winter, almost Winter and
Construction.
26. The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus.
27. You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
28. You perk up when you hear the theme from "Hockey Night in Canada"
29. You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your
Canadian friends.