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August '00
Quote of the Month
"If my mom's a lesbian, and she's living with another woman, and my father's gay, do you think I'm gonna care if my parents had sex to conceive me? I have enough problems!" -- Suzanne, homage to Cari
(8/17)
8/3
Las Vegas, Mandalay Bay
"You'd eat cardboard if it was dripping with butter." -- Reyna Berman
8/4
Grand Canyon, In the car outside the Best Western
Reyna: I'm so happy to be here together with my family!
Lauren: I get to wear jeans.
8/5
The Grand Canyon
"If the mule won't take you, maybe you should reconsider going." -- Eric Berman, on the fact that the weight limit for a mule ride down the Canyon is 200lbs.
8/7
The Pointe Hilton in Phoenix
"Dad, you snored me out of the room!" -- Tracee Berman
8/8
Chops Steakhouse in Phoenix
"When I lifted the bags to put them in the car, they were so heavy, it was like we packed rocks!" -- Eric, upset about the fact that we actually did pack rocks.
8/9
Someone's House
"I'm a loper." -- Alex, on her affinity for canteloupe
8/10
The Vanderbilt
"Hi I'm Jen and my INNARDS ARE SHAKING!" -- Tompy
Tompy, by the way, is Jen LENIHAN. Much in the same way that Hoter is Alexandra Martine Spitzli, and Disuhan is Lauren Christine Bryde.
8/11
Online
"Damn the uterus!" -- Sara, after I got a lot of points for spelling uterus on Word Racer and consequently beat her.
8/12
Disuhan's house
"I didn't want to lick him, I wanted to lick his candy!" -- Disuhan
"It's too intimate a candy." -- Kathleen
"I didn't know that 'Californication' was a play on words. My mom had to explain it to me." -- Kathleen
Stone Temple Pilots/Chili Peppers concert
"What a whiny group." -- Christine
Elsewhere ... not quite sure
"We've gone past skank and straight into bitch!" -- Sara
8/13
Online
Andrew: I'm as pure as the white, fallen snow, after it's been stepped in a bit.
Clarice: Yes, and I'm like snow that's been pissed on.
8/14
Barnes & Noble
"We're gonna die! We're gonna die! We're gonna die! We're gonna die! We're gonna die, at a stupid Texan's hand!" -- Jen Skirkanich
8/15
Online
"There are no windows in my dad's office. Or clocks. It's like a casino!" -- Andrew
"Scurvy question ... lime juice, anyone?" -- Adam J Davidowitz
8/16
Online
"I wouldn't be able to pick you out of a crowd and say, 'Well, look at that!'" -- Katie
8/17
Online
"[Semicolons] are truly the boyscouts of the punctuation community." -- Alyssa
McDonald's
"My computer's loving it, but what about me?" -- Suzanne, about online relationships
Andrew's Car, on the way to Thunders
"If my mom's a lesbian, and she's living with another woman, and my father's gay, do you think I'm gonna care if my parents had sex to conceive me? I have enough problems!" -- Suzanne, homage to Cari
8/18
Suigetsu, a superior Dojo
"Now your washing machine is a brilliant martial artist." -- Laura
Online
"By golly I've been Gustered!" -- Cricket
"Oh, stop yer Gusterin'." -- Cricket, who thinks Guster sounds like a verb
8/19
In Sara's mom's car somewhere between Tuxedo, NY and Suffolk County
"If you see a Cabrio, instead of punching someone, give it to me." -- Sara
Sara: I'm the Grammar Queen.
Andrew: I'm the Grammar Court Jester.
Erika: I'm the Grammar Engineering Student.
Sara: Adam's in the Grammar Dungeon.... I can send people there, and I will quite liberally.
Erika: Yes, and your Grammar Dragon can eat them.
Sara: Its name is Semicolon.
"Veni vidi arrivaderci!" -- Mad Libs creation
"The first pig was not funny, and he built his house out of Erika's jokes." -- The best Mad Libs creation ever!
Kim's House
"They're her legs! They're nowhere near her breasts!" -- Andrew, about men who would not have sex with Capri pants-wearing, otherwise attractive women
"Oh, oh, are you scratching your Margaret?" -- Kim, to Matt, who was of course scratching his Margaret
"Alcohol, the great equalizer." -- Adam
I would also like to note that on this day Erika viciously kicked Adam for reasons that shall remain undisclosed. But boy it was funny.
8/20
Adam's House
Gina: I'm happy with my boobs.
Andrew: I'm happy with them too.
Gina: That means a lot from you.
8/21
Kim's car, on the way to the Diner
"I like screaming at people, and being mean." -- Kim
8/22
Online, but both in Syracuse
Andrew: Your residents are going to love you, or be frightened of you.
Cameron: Either way I win.
8/24
Kelly's Car, driving around Syracuse
"He and I got into this really long conversation, during which I realized he could speak." -- Kelly, about one of the Nates
"You know I'm really pissed when I start spouting out insults that involve lots of farm animals." -- Kelly
Our House (It's a very very very fine house)
"It was the night there was semen on the board." -- Betsy
8/26
1019 Madison, otherwise known as Our House
"It's Passover! Look at my breasts!" -- Kelly
"It's more fun when Andrew sucks." -- Kelly
"Is that a plum on your board, or are you just happy to see me?" -- Betsy
"We've got a banana, it's gonna get phallic." -- Betsy
8/27
Crouse Info Desk
Jessica Kielb: I was Britney Spears last year for Halloween.
Alyssa: You should dress up like her this year and be like, "Oops I did it again."
"It always freaks me out when I find a dead bug that's not squashed. It's just dead, and I wonder why it's dead, and why I'm not dead." -- Mike Bialaszewski
8/28
Crouse Lounge
"There's a community in my pants." -- Kelly
Online
"I have others on my To-Rape List, but Hoter is definitely #1 in the Tri-State Area." -- Jen LENIHAN
8/29
Crouse
"It's TBA and it's still not ... A!" -- Bekah
Hall of Languages, IST 352
"It's a tough class; it's boring, actually." -- Prof. Dmitry Roussinov, who then proceeded to tell us that he'd spice it up with extra assignments
Amusing Crossword at Yahoo
Clue: Self-guided tour. Answer: EGOTRIP
Our House
"Who needs assholes anyway? ...We'd all be full of shit if it weren't for assholes!" -- Betsy
"Never fret, never fear. There's milk right above the beer!" -- Betsy
"I want to feel your warm Brazil, and touch your Panama." -- Diana Krall in "Popsicle Toes."
Betsy: I have an ocean in my pants.
Mike: And a canal in the middle!
8/30
Crouse Lounge
Adam (JD): My instrument is bigger than yours.
Kelly: Where's your instrument NOW?
(Adam is violin and Kelly is voice)
8/31
Andrew's Room (at school)
"Hold on, I'm NOT coming." -- Mike, as Sara and I were discussing the difference between Ben and Gary's reaction to socialization.