1. Remember, when bribing, be discreet about it. No one's gonna take you seriously if you try it in plain sight. Bathrooms are great for this kinda stuff.

2. Shamelessness is a virtue. If losing, don't be above offering your opponent koku, or, depending on the situation, cash, to throw the match. Snivel, whine, whatever. Just advance.

3. If you get caught, be sure at least one judge has been bribed beforehand to argue with and overturn the other judge.

4. If someone pulls into an early lead in a Swiss tournament, and the tournament lasts until everyone starts getting hungry, have a mutual friend(preferably non-involved in the tournament) take him out for a meal. Be sure the meal lasts a good 15 minutes after the start time of the next round.

5. If they don't *see* the fourth Breach of Etiquette, it's not there. Meditate upon this truth.

6. Know when to quit. It's not worth spending $50 in bribes for a $25 dollar prize.

7. Always be polite. An arrogant, blustery player isn't going to get far in the world of corruption.

8. This ties in with number eight, but never, ever put yourself in a position to be suspected. If you get caught blatantly cheating, there's little doubt that you will be absent from many tournments in your immediate future...