How You Know Your AN AZN
AZN TEST PART 2
AZN TEST PART 1
You know you're asian if... You never took off the price tag on your shirt so you can still get a full refund if you find something cheaper. - meow baa Your parents make you drink Fu Cha instead of going to the doctors. - meow baa You own a pager, a cell phone, a MD player, and a Honda - meow baa You only shop at the flea market - meow baa You pronounce "z" as yee-set - meow baa People have troulbe prounoucing your full name - meow baa Your bangs are either long enough for you to touch with your tongue, or your hair is gelled up in spikes hard enough to impale small mammals - Juuhachi-Gou You call people "peepz" since two syllables is too complex for you - Juuhachi-Gou You don't know the names of cities; only area codes - Juuhachi-Gou You've never heard of any other sporting wear than Nike. (Reebok? What's that?) - Juuhachi-Gou You can't buy a shirt unless it's priced over $40 and has a collossal sized Tommy Hillfiger or Polo label - Juuhachi-Gou When you're trying to pick up a chick, she asks if you can cook, and you reply "Do I cook? Well, not really but I can whip up a pretty mean fried rice!" - Juuhachi-Gou You can never address a friend without calling them "foo." - Juuhachi-Gou You use the letter "z" in every other word when chatting - Juuhachi-Gou Your mother has a short-haired, curly perm. Your dad is some sort of engineer. Your parents still tried to get you into places half-price saying you were 12 when you were really 15. You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later they're still lecturing. You have a 40 lb. bag of rice in your pantry. You shop 99 Ranch. Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from. You've had a bowl haircut at one point in your life. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends' kids. You've had to sit through karaoke videos with scantily clad, ugly Asian women attempting to dance and walk around a temple, forest or library.
You know you're asian if... Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks and English words that make no sense, in great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange and the ever popular lime green. Your parents insist you marry within your race. You never order chop suey, sweet and sour pork, or any other imitation oriental food. Your parents have never kissed you. Your parents have never kissed each other. You learned about the birds and the bees from someone other than your parents. "You want a stereo! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!!" People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate. You have to call just about all your parent's friends "Auntie and Uncle." You have 12+ aunts and uncles. At expensive restaurants, you order a delicious glass of water for your beverage and NEVER order dessert. Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread and say "Eat it anyway. It's still good." You will most likely be taller than your parents. Your parents have either made you play the piano, the violin or both. You get nothing if you do well in school, but get in big trouble if you don't. When going to other peoples' houses, you always have to bring a gift. Your dad still pulls his socks up to his knees, you know, the ones with the blue and pink stripes at the top. Your family always cheers for the Asian athlete on TV (i.e., Michael Chang, Michelle Kwan). The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations or any of the rest of the furniture. You have rocks, sticks, leaves and strange-smelling, unknown substances in your pantry for use as medicine. You own a rice cooker or two. You buy soy sauce by the gallon. Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head. Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going. Your parents buy you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come.
