I guess I'd better start this with an introduction. My name is Diane, I'm 36 years old. I have long blonde hair, blue gray eyes, which tend to get dark blue when I'm mad. I'm not modest so I have no problem telling you that I'm beautiful. I'd say my best feature is my skin, very smooth, no blemishes to speak of, naturally tan in color. Next best feature I'd say is my mouth. It's rather large, with nice straight white teeth, I'll add here that I've never had a cavity. I have a big smile, seductive at times, with nice full lips. I'm 5'8" tall, weigh 118 lbs.. I have a great figure, I guess you'd say I have a hard body as I work out a lot. Best asset body wise would be my legs and my tight buns. I'm not large breasted a "C" cup, thanks to having my two children as I was only a small "B" before they were born. As far as having children it did of course effect my body, at first a few stretch marks were visible but they have since faded, you really have to look hard to find them. Over all the effect was great, besides the bigger boobs, it also made me shapelier.

Early on in my life I found that I was an exhibitionist. I was 16 at the time, my next door neighbor's bedroom was right across from mind. Both of our houses were two story with our bedrooms being on the second floor each facing the side of the house. I just never pulled my curtains shut, I really didn't think there was a need to, you couldn't see into my room from outside and my neighbor, Kathy was a friend. One day Kathy told me that she caught her brother and a few of his friends in her bedroom looking at me as I undressed one night. I don't know why but that excited me on, Kathy was a senior in high school, I was a sophomore but we had been friends since I'd been little so I confided in her that I kind of liked knowing that. Even though we were close friends, I was afraid that she'd think I was weird. I was relieved when she told me she wished she had a body like mine, then she wouldn't pull the curtains either. Not that I really had such a great body but Kathy was chunky and wanted to be thin like I was. Anyway, after that when ever her brother and his friends would sneak into her bedroom at night, she'd call me to let me know. I'd then undress for them in front of the window trying to act like I didn't know anyone was there. It got to the point where I'd caress my breast and slide my hand between my legs trying to put on the best show I could. There were nights, I'd be so turned on by this, that I'd shut off all my lights except a night light, then lay on my bed masturbating, knowing that they could at least see a little of what I was doing. I guess my first orgasm was on such a night.

These feelings had other effects on me to, mainly in the way I'd dress. I sure wasn't opposed to showing to much leg, or at times showing my panty covered buns or pussy either. My showing off progressed to a point that one night I did a strip tease at one of our wilder high school parties. I have to admit I started it but when a couple of the other girls joined in it was easy to strip naked. I was so turned on that night, I think if one of the guys would have tried hard enough I would have had intercourse with him. I was at the party with my boy friend, but I have a feeling that any of the guys could have done me. Of course I was drunk along with the other girls at the party, lets face it guys you intentionally try to get us women to drink to much, most of us seem to lose our inhibitions then.

Other then that night, I was pretty tame sexually, normal high school stuff, necking, petting, sometimes letting a guy get in my pants, and occasionally giving a guy a hand job but nothing more then that. After high school I did fall in love with a guy and gave him my virginity. I planed on marrying him, having sex with him seemed natural to me and it being good sex was a bonus. I say bonus because at the time I didn't realize how important good sex is to a marriage, my opinion any way. Things don't always work out as you plan and when my boy friend broke up with me I was devastated.

When I finally did start dating again it was back to necking, petting, sometimes letting a guy get in my pants, and occasionally giving a guy a hand job, I wasn't intending to go further until after I was married. Intent and actions don't always mix. One night I excepted a ride home from a party with two guys. One I did have the hots for, the other I liked as a friend. I'd already had to much to drink, but when one of them produced a bottle of Bailey's I drank more. It wasn't long before I was necking with the guy I though of as a friend. I didn't stop him when he unbutton my blouse and pulled my bra up above my breasts. I was drunk, I was horny, and I was turned on. I didn't notice that the car had stopped until I felt the other guys hand on my thigh, working his way up under my skirt. And being he was the guy I really wanted I didn't stop him either. It wasn't long before he slide his hand under the side of my panties and started to working on my clit. I'd like to say I didn't like what was going on. I'd like to say I didn't like one guy sucking on my breast while the other guy fingered my clitoris. I really did tell myself that later but you can't really lie to yourself. I let them remove my cloths, one taking off my blouse and bra the other taking off my skirt and panties.

When the guy on the passenger side of the car opened the door, took my hand and assisted me outside, I'd like to say he pulled me out, not assisted me out but that wasn't how it happened I got out under my own power. When he put me on the truck of the car getting between my legs, I'd like to say I resisted, I didn't. When he penetrated me I'd like to say I wasn't willing but I was willing and so very wet. I'd like to say I didn't love the feeling of one man sucking my nipples, fondling my breasts, while the other fucked me, but I did. I'd like to say I put a stop to it after the first guy came but I didn't, I eagerly took the second guys cock. I'd like to say I came to my senses then got dressed and just went home. But what I did was get back in the car, didn't dress and loved it when the both fingered my sloppy cunt as they drove me to my apartment. They didn't come up to my apartment with me, I'd like to say that I didn't want them to but I did.

Of course like I said we all lie to ourselves so the next day I rationalized that I didn't like what had happened, I'd never do that again. It wasn't my fault, I was drunk and they took advantage of me. I wasn't a willing participant. I lied to myself that I'd never have intercourse with another man until I'm married. You can lie to yourself but deep down you know it's not true. And when a few nights later they came to my apartment I let them in. I knew why they were there, they knew why they were there. My roommate didn't but I'm sure she did when we went to my bedroom. I was stone cold sober and I let it happen again, the only difference was that this time it wasn't rushed and I actually had some orgasms. I also found out I liked pleasuring a man with my month while another is pleasuring me with his cock. When they left I swore it wouldn't happen again, and it didn't. The next time they came back, months later, I was in love with someone and I was sure I was going to be faithful to him forever. I sent them away, but I didn't let them in my door because I think deep down I knew that if I did, I would.

My state of mind when I met my future husband, Richard was that I hoped to not fuck again until after marriage but inside I wanted to, I think I wanted to be easy. If that first night Rich would have pushed it he could have fucked me but like most men I'd have never seen him again. What happened was we hit it off on the first date, Rich didn't push the sex issue. He asked me out a number of times after that never pushing me, and by the time he did I wasn't about to give in, I was afraid I'd loss him if I did. I didn't want Rich to think I was easy. It wasn't long after that we became exclusive. Rich liked my wilder side, my exhibitionism side, my last boy friend had not. Rich encouraged me to sometimes flash strangers, even talked me into not wearing panties when we'd go out. Sometimes I'd wear really short skirts, and with Rich's encouragement I'd occasionally flash my pussy. The night's I'd do the most flashing were the night I'd be the most horny, letting Rich get close to having intercourse on those nights. It was so hard not to but I didn't want Rich to think I was anything but a virgin. One night we went to a strip club, it was amateur night, Rich tried to talk me into stripping but I didn't. When he asked me to go back the next Tuesday I eagerly agreed, more so because I realized how much I liked watching the other women strip, but partly because I knew he'd try to talk me into stripping. I ended up getting really wasted which gave me enough courage to strip so I did. I loved taking my cloths off in front of so many strangers, I loved the cat calls, I loved the way the men looked at me, some of the women to. I was so turned on by the experience that I was actually wet when I left the stage.

I was so horny when I left the club I allowed Rich to have intercourse with me that night. Tell you the truth is wasn't what I expected, Rich is a lousy fuck, no other way to say it. First off he rushed everything, no real foreplay, and no oral at all. For that matter he never has liked to give me oral, I could number the times he had since that night on one hand. That is until the second time I cheated, orals been ok after that night but only ok never great. Having your man not want to give you oral isn't great on your self esteem. I'll tell you, you start to worry about why, you have thoughts like maybe he doesn't like the way I smell, or I taste bad. It was that way with me until we'd been married a number of years, after my second affair, that is when I decided that I didn't care if Rich liked the way I smelled or tasted, three other men and one woman did and he was going to learn to like it.

Rich is also very small, you'd never know that from looking at him he had a great body. Not that I'd have an orgasms from someone just because he's large. Most of the time I need to be brought to orgasm, hopefully lots of them, before intercourse, if I am I almost always have an orgasms during intercourse to. That is if the guy doesn't ejaculate to soon. But I do know, at least for me, if a guy is big it's easier for me to have an orgasm. The whole experience of being fucked by a nice thick cock is better. I suppose a cock could be to big, I haven't found one but then again I haven't found any of the 10, 11, or 12 inchers you men seem to talk about either. I'll comment here that when I read a supposed true story where even a few of the men are that big it's a dead give away that the story is not true. Not to many men built like that and even less women willing to fuck a guy that is, for god sakes peoples hold a ruler to your crouch. Or maybe the guys who write those stories are all built like my husband and even average looks like a foot to then. I don't believe that either, I've never found another 4" cock so I figure that's rare to. But given the choice I'll take the 4 over the 12 any day.

The other problem with Rich is that he ejaculates to quickly, a problem he still has to this day. I was in love with Rich so I over looked all of that, I didn't at the time realize sex was so important, and I did think he'd improve as time went on. And he has some, but only because I demand it. I've still never had a virginal orgasm with him. Sex seems incomplete without one or two of those. I really can't say that back then I even though about Rich having such a small penis. I'd might as well give you the measurements now, Just under 4" and just over 2 ?" inches around. He had what he had and I love him. Later I did start to think about penis size, partly due to what I'd read, mostly do to the influence of my girl friends, in particular my friend Kathy, her husband was big and she'd brag about how wonderful it felt. Later after the two of them got a divorce she'd rate her men based on penis size, if a guy was small he didn't have a chance with her. I guess you might say she was obsessed with size. I may add I've become a little like that myself.

Back to my story. I didn't win that night, I was a real amateur but I liked stripping so I practiced until I was good enough to win at a few of the clubs. I seriously though about becoming a stripper. With Rich's encouragement, I finally applied at one of the wilder private clubs that had an opening. Beside stripping at the club, the job required stripping at private parties. The women who interviewed me had been a stripper but now ran the club. I didn't have to many question to ask about stripping at the club I'd been there enough. I did ask some question about the lap dances. Most of the stripper let the men touch them and I wondered if that was required or not. It wasn't, it was not even suppose to happen, but she had to admit that tips were a lot better for the stripper that allowed touching.

Most of my questions had to do with the private parties, I'd never been to one. First she explained that I'd always have an escort that way things wouldn't get out of hand. He was responsible to get me to the party, collect all money's owned in advance, then make sure I got to the next engagement in time, if there was more then one party that night. She told me that I'd be paid different amounts depending on how many sets were requested. She explained that some of the parties I'd just do a strip and leave, but most of the parties I'd be requested to do lap dances, usually one for the man, or sometime a woman, who the party was for. I'd be paid extra for each lap dance. I'd be required to do lap dances only if they had been requested in advance. If time allowed I could do extra lap dances but they had to be paid for in advance. Any tips would be mine to keep, then she winked and said for some of the strippers the tips were more then the club paid.

After the interview was over she asked if I'd like a drink, I said yes. After the bartender mixed us our drinks she lead me to a table near the back of the club. Then in a low voice, she told me though the club did not condone it, but I could make a lot of extra money doing private parties. Almost all the girls allowed some touching while lap dancing, for an extra charge, the amount being up to each stripper. A lot of the girls went beyond that if the money was right. I was tempted to ask what but I wasn't that na?ve. Of course the amount and payment terms were up to the stripper but if I wanted to earn a lot of extra money I could. She told me she still did certain private parties when she needed extra money. She also told me that I'd be requested more if I did extra's, as she called them. Then she told me that if I was interested she could set me up with some really special private parties, parties that the club didn't know about, parties that paid a lot of money but of course she got a cut of that. I couldn't believe what I was hearing she was offering me a job as a whore, what about me would even make her think I was interested.

As shocked as I was, I was still interested in stripping and I was a little curious about what it would be like doing a wild private party. Not the ones she was talking about but ones with lots of lap dances, lots of guys having there hands all over you. I didn't give my answer about taking the job right away, I did think about it for a while, had a couple of wild fantasies to. When I finally did decided to take the job, the position had been filled but she promised to call me when she had an opening. Before I left she again offered to set me up with some private parties. I did decline, but I have to admit to being curious. I'm trying as much as possible to be truthful here, I think that if I'd have gotten that job done some private parties that given time I would have at some point gone beyond just lab dances and guys feeling me up. The stripping alone turned me on, then rubbing myself up and down on a guys cock, even with his cloths on would have turned me on more, then knowing I was being watched as a bonus. I'm sure I would have gone further, I'd almost be willing to bet that the first time that happened I wouldn't have charged a dime.

She finally called me with a job opening about a month before Rich and I were to be married, I even though about taking it but decided it was just not the right job for a married woman. When I told Rich, I was surprised that he seemed disappointed that I didn't take it. There were things I should have realized about Richard from that episode in my life, the signs were all there, I guess I just didn't want to see them. I guess it was more then not wanting to, I didn't know men like Richard existed.

My life moved on and I married Rich. Our life together became routine just like all marriages, we bought a house, so on and so forth. I wasn't unhappy with my life but then again I wasn't happy either. Sex with Rich didn't improve much, I did try to improve it, I'd buy book after book, I'd read them but he wouldn't, I did learn things but the truth was it wasn't me that needed improving. I tried be subtle, teaching Rich new things in a way that wouldn't hurt his masculinity and did at least succeed in teaching him how important my clitoris was. But the truth is he still rushed things so I rarely had an orgasm. Our sex drives weren't a match either, I wanted a lot of sex, Rich was more then happy with once or at the most twice a week. Something I'd have never known while dating him, he was after me all the time then.

The physical attraction I felt for Rich changed to, I'm sure partly do to the fact we were together all the time but mostly because he allowed himself to get so out of shape. He had gained a lot of weight, and was no longer the hard muscular bodied man I had married, not really fat but flabby, with a beer gut. Maybe that shouldn't have mattered but I worked hard at staying in shape, partly for him, he could have done the same for me. Him being out of shape seemed even worse because we'd become part of a group of eight couples who all boated, not one of the other men let themselves go like that. They weren't all hunk either, three of them were real nice looking, and one guy you'd call a hunk. But all of seven of them stayed in shape. We were an active group, did a lot of outdoor activities and Rich would always be the first to tire out. We'd go places and take long hikes, Rich and I would always be left behind because he couldn't keep up, eventually it got to be just Rich being left behind as I'd stay with the group.

After my first child was born, my libido went way up and Rich's seem to do just the opposite, so I'd been tempted to cheat a few times, coming close at a few wild parties. Tempted isn't really the right word, I didn't think about cheating, I didn't plan to cheat. But given a few to many drinks, the right guy and the fact that Rich ignores me at parties, I'd had plenty of opportunity and had done a lot of heavy petting. Coming really close to cheating one night with one of the men, Marty, in our group. After that I tried to avoid being alone with Marty, as I said I didn't plan on cheating.

My feeling at the time are hard to explain, I had a need for sex that wasn't being fulfilled. I had a desire for other men but I'd had that even when I was just dating Rich, and I'd never strayed. My desire for Rich had changed, even though the sex hadn't ever been good I'd always before had a desire for him, that was gone most of the time now. I wanted sex but I wanted it to be great sex and even when Rich and I had sex, which wasn't often, it wasn't even good sex. Before I'd think about sex occasionally now I was thinking about it most of the time. I wanted a man one who could make love to me, bring me to new heights but I didn't want to cheat. I guess in my heart I wanted that man to be Rich. I wanted a miracle, Rich wasn't ever going to be that man.