MIDDLE OF LIFE

---Vinay Jagtap.k

A few years ago , when I was in a awkward phase of sprouting hair above my upper lip & underarms , I realised that my voice was turning deeper . How I had waited for this day when I could walk up to the girls & say with a gravelly voice with honey topping ‘HI ‘ . Anyone who would have read Mills & Boon could have easily identified the voice . Also about the same time I realised that the girls were growing too but thier clothes were not growing & that was when I started to like them . Till then if anyone mentioned about Priety or Ramya I would turn red & swear - ‘ stupid , donkey ‘’ ! I don’t think the problemo was that no girl liked me . The worst part was , no girl told me either . This was not my problem alone . I am willing to bet my cola can that 98% of the boys , including my gang , faced a similar problem , the other two per cent being the happy ones . Therefore this was not a cause of worry to me. I had just finished my boards & it was holidays after what I term it as gruesome days .

I was watching TV when GC yelled ‘’ Hey you whatya doing inside man , come out . Lets have a look at mother nature , we’ve been missing her for quite a long time’’

‘’Bye mom , i’ll drink the coffee later ’’ , saying so I grabbed my cap & jumped on his bike .

We did’nt have a drivers license , but we were’nt that dumb either to roam in front of the traffic cops . We would just freak about in crossroads & any slightest hint about a cop & It was a no no to that road.

‘’Look at that man ,is’nt she pretty ’’ I said

‘’Shut up & look ahead & drive ‘’

‘’Okay man , lemme atleast have a look at them ’’

‘’ Fine’’

In the evening my gang would play cricket & then at 6 ‘o’ clock sharp we would meet at our ‘Adda’ . We would hang in there for some time & then proceed to the most pious place we had ever known then ‘’BG circle’’ . Man the place is really good , believe me it still is . Wandering aimlessly we would eye the so called pretty things . The pretty things would range from kids to aunties . We would always envy such uncles . Gowda , the eldest among us would gaze & stare at them hoping to get a look atleast if not a smile from them . Returning from there , sitting in our adda we would come out with plans & statergies to woo the good ones untill our parents would growl

‘’Come on in ,it’s high time ‘’

‘’Bye guys seeya ‘’

This was how my typical day would start & come to a tragic end.

One day we decided to watch a movie , an action movie , well a different type of action movie.

‘’We aren’t supposed to watch such a movie , we are under age’’said Sri.

’’Does not matter ,hook or crook I want to watch the movie’’ Anil retorted.

’’Fine fine i’ve got an idea ,lets dress in such a manner that we’ll look that we are over age’’Gowda interupted.

‘’What do you mean ‘’ I asked

‘’Simple everyone grow your hairs & gotees so that we ’vell look atleast 2 years elder’’ From that day it became a routine for everyone to see how much hair had grown for each one . Of course there would be fights to decide who had the maximum hair.

Luckily we didn’t have to wait for a long time some of them had a good growth & we decided to go the next day. All went fine till we reached the theatre . A watchman , looked like a policeman to us was starring at us . Butterflies were flying in our stomach. ’’What if we get caught ? , what will the neighbours & relatives Think ?, lets run away’’ .These were the common thoughts that were running in everyones mind.

‘’How many ?’’

‘’Four balcony’’ I said weekly

Gathering our courage we went inside .Watched the movie.Did’nt like it. Some of them were petrified.Decided not to watch anymore.

Results were out & everyone were in tension.no one would come out of the house.No adda No BG circle .Only temples. I passed with fairly flying colours . The rest of the gang also did so , but their’s wasn’t that fair . I got the most in my gang . My colours also were’nt that bright , but they saw me getting a addmission in a fairly , supposedely good & a decent institution . I really did’nt hate wearing uniform to college but it was the colour of the uniform which I used to really hate . Sick colour .

On the first day to college Mom handed me 5 Rs ‘’Here’s your pocket expenses for today’’

‘’What 5 bucks ? what will you get for this’’

‘’That’s your bus fare ,it will cost you only 2 bucks .Do any thing with the remaining cash’’

‘’Remaining cash I don’t think i’ll have enough to by gum or not’’

‘’Bye mom , bye dad, bye tan ,seeya later’’. At around 7 . 30 I reached the bus stand . Most of them if not all kept staring at me ’’ Is my fly open or am I not dressed properly ‘’ I thought . Then it flashed to me that it was this stupid coloured uniform which was making me the centre of everyones attraction.

I just blushed at the on lookers & quickly & luckily got into the bus . The bus was infact overflowing . I just clung on to something hard . I got at my stop only to find my neatly pressed uniform ruffled & my new bag almost torn . I didn’t want to come to college like this daily .’’I should do something about this’’ Thinking I just walked in to the college .I saw many boys & girls talking to each other & this made me even more sick that I didn’t have any friends & have to wait till I make new ones. Thinking like this I was just watching the college campus,when suddenly someone patted my back.Turning back who do I see Koji & Gaurav. Man was I happy to see them ,I was overjoyed .They were my close pals in school.

‘’You to vicky’’

‘’I couldn’t do a thing. I was helpless’’

‘’We too ‘’

‘’any way our fate let’s face it’’

The bell went & we didn’t know where to go. We wasted a solid 20 mts before enquiring in the ofiice . They directed us to the class

‘’Excuse us Mam, can we get in’’

‘’Sure come in , but don’t make this an habit’’

‘’Sorry Mam’’

Walking down to the class my eyes fell on something which I thought was the most soothing thing I had ever seen till then.

‘’Come on boys introduce yourself to the rest of the class’’

‘’My name is Gaurav & I am from N.E.S ‘’

‘’My name is Vickram & I am also from N.E.S’’

‘’My name is Rai, Koji kumaresh Rai & I am also from the same school’’

The teacher then went Blah, Blah.... Who listens to the teacher anyway ‘’Who’s that girl da’’ I nugged koji

‘’Your Bhabhi ‘’

‘’See properly not my Bhabhi your Bhabhi’’

‘’Okay, which one ?’’

‘’Second bench 3 rd one from right’’

‘’Thank god I ‘ll be happy with the 3rd bench ,first on the right.Shit , we missed their intro we have to wait till the next class, What do you think their names will be ‘’ koji was already excited.

‘’ I know, that ones called Ambujakshi’’ I said

‘’ Ambu, what ?’’. ‘’Shut up Mam is watching’’. for the rest of the period we had to listen to all the rubbish she was saying.Gaurav had already dozed off. The bell went off & the teacher walked out asking us to maintain silence.All koji & I do was to stare at them .An elderly man walked in ‘’I am very happy that you people have maintained silence, you know silence is golden, Blah,Blah........ I have 1 more thing to tell you I am also the principal of this college. ‘’Oh ! god what a bore’’ , we thought

‘’ Now students introduce yourself ‘’

‘’Yess, that’s it ‘’ we were overjoyed.As the introduction went on tension kept creeping into us.Then came Her chance, seeing her all thoughts got jammed I reached dreamland

‘’She walks in beauty like the night, of cloudless climes & starry skies, & all that’s best of dark & bright meet in her aspect & her eyes’’

‘’What was it, what did she say her name was ?’’ I shook koji

‘’ I dont’know don’t disturb next is Her chance.I think she said Andalamma’’ ‘’O shut up you ass***’’’

‘’My name is Divya & I am from Sophia’s girls high school’’

‘’How divine ‘’ koji was in dreamland already.

I cursed my luck & my foolish thoughts . I had to wait for the next class. The princi went on & on.... Blah ,Blah......... ‘’ I want to tell you one last thing ,there won’t be any more classes today .you can all go home & from tomorrow you will have the full fledge classes. your timetable has been put up on the notice board.make sure you take it down’’ Walking down the corridor ‘’I think Divya is a really nice girl , isnt she’’ koji went on.’’ Aah ! ,maybe’’ .My thoughts were some where else

‘’How are you going home’’

‘’Flying carpet’’

‘’Very funny let’s wait , my driver said he’s going to come & I ‘ll drop you home’’

‘’ Thank’s , but what shall we do till then ‘’ I asked

‘’There’s divya let’s go & talk to her ‘’

‘’Wait a sec ‘’

Koji was off . I had known koji for the past 5 yrs. He was a rich lad, his father had some factory. He was’nt one of thoes reserved guys & mixed around freely with everyone .I hurried behind him. Atleast I could make her my friend

‘’ O Hi ! , I am called koji’’

‘’ & I am vickram’’

‘’ So’’. Looked like maybe she was not in mood to talk to us . But be what may I always appreciated the will power in koji ,even though 8 out of 10 times he never suceeded. ‘’Soo ,nothings new infact. It’s just that the place where they have put up the time table is a bit crowded you see,so I thought maybe we could copy it down from someone’s who already copied.Just saw yo copyping soo’’

‘’Yeah’’ I nodded

She gave us one of thoes doubtful sought of look & opened her bag’’ You guys better be quick , I don’t want to be strangled here when the bus arrives’’

‘’ Okay....., by the by where do you stay’’ pinned koji

Maybe she never heard it or she pretended not to here, but it was obvious to us that she did not want to tell us when she said ‘ South of Bangalore’

‘’Here thanks’’ we said in unison

The bus was approaching in full speed & she got into it & while doing it she just smiled & said ‘Bye ‘ ‘’Yess! I knew it .

I knew it ‘’ koji blutered

‘’Knew what’’

‘’I knew that she would say that’’

‘’Humph’’

‘’Any what do you think about her da, do you think she’s okay for me ?’’

‘’Yeah, I think you don’t deserve such a nice girl friend . Now you better help me’’ I whimped

‘’What did you say her name was ?’’ koji asked

‘’Well if I had known that I wouldn’t have bothered you much’’

‘’There comes the car come let’s go’’

All the way back we watched some chicks. some good, some bad & some ugly .Kept fond memoirs of good ones & forgot the rest. I got down at my place ‘’Thank’s’’ ‘’Anything for a pal’’

I came home & acted as though I was very very tired

‘’How’s college, wash yourself & in the meantime i’ll serve you lunch’’ mom sonded very anxious

‘’College is okay but it’s the travelling I don’t like. it’s gruelsome . I think I better take my cycle to college’’

‘’We will decide later , after talking to father

Evening all my friend waited in the adda. I hurried past there .’’ Did you make any new friends. how are girls man’’ all the gang barged into me. cool it guys ‘’all old friends .the girls are okay except one’’. Wow . ‘’what’s her name & how’s she’’the gang was really excited.

‘’ I .. dont know her name still but I ‘ll let you guys know her name tommorrow & on the question of looks she looks like Alicia Silverstones long last sis’’.

‘’ Come on maan’’ the gang roared

‘’ honestly guys’’ fine.

we talked about each others college & thier greatneses & spent one more day chatting.

Back home ‘’ dad can I take my cycle to college from tommorrow , the busses are very crowded I have to wait for a long time ‘’

‘’Sure vicky but I dont think you will be able to go such a long distance peddling . you will get tired easily ‘’

‘’ but I am not a small boy any more & I think I do have the stamina’’

‘’ Okay, try it’’

I was 100% sure dad was in a very good mood else he would’nt have allowed me for such a thing. I was more than happy. I watched TV for some time & then slept off. Next morning I was cycling my way to college . Koji went past me in his bike & signalled to me that it was his new bike. I was down with jealousy & cursed my dumb cycle all the way to the college. the distance never seemed to end . I had been pedaling for the past half an hour or so but I had not reached my college yet By the time I reached college the bell had gone & everyone was in the prayer .I just looked around when koji signalled me to join the line slowly . I tip toed myself behind the line when every one was saying the prayer. ‘’ look man it’s so easy , from tommorow I shall come at the same time’’ ‘’ha,ha’’ . We were gigling when suddenly the prayer ended , principle looked up & saw us gigling . He didn’t say a thing so we shut ourselves up. We hurriedly made our way to the class.It was the hindi class & I particularily did not like this subject much . all I had to do was wail away this period & the next hour would be my favourite class Physics.

’’aap log kal se pustaken lekhe aaye , mein apko padhathi hoon’’ (get your books & I shall start the classes from tomorrow). Nice lady she was, just gave us some introduction & told us about the scholars & hindi pundits who could be admired. any way the period went fast . half of my thoughts centered around the second bench. Just when I was feeling the pain in my butt , mam said ‘’here i’ll take your attendence today & that’s it for now’’. How I had waited for this moment.

She started ‘’ akshay , balu,bhavya....,naresh, nivea.... ‘.

’’Wow what a name ! so this was it, her name is nivea’’ .koji & I gazed at each other .

‘’did she say nivea , oops sorry but it was what I heard’’koji looked puzzeled & was I .We answered our attendence & sat mum .

’’It can’t be maybe we heard it wrong ‘’.

Shruthi was just preparing to go out .We noticed her talking to nivea.They both were gigling hard which we thought it was a clear indication that they had brushed thier teeth.Shruthi was the only girl we had known in the college as she was from our school.So if something was to happen it would be through shruthi. We waited till break time & slowly made our way to Shruthi.

‘’ Hi , ya ! howdya like this college ‘’ koji just asked

‘’ Ya the college is okay,../........ blah, blah.....’’ this was not in our mind when we intended to ask her . We knew she was a chatterbox but we had to undergo all this afterall Kuch panay ke liye kuch khona padtha hai.

‘’ how about some new friends you made’’ I enquired

‘’ Not many only a few’’

‘’ how about that friend of yours, is she Catholic or Roman’’

‘’which one ‘’ she narrowed her eyebrows

‘’ That one over there ,look she just turned back’’

‘’ Ooh ! that girl . NILIMA come here fast ‘’ shruthi yelled in the class Aaha , her name is nilima & we mistook it for nivea oh god what do we do now?

Nilima came up to us & ‘’ what’s it’

‘’These guys want to know whether you are Catholic or Roman’’she was just laughing we were very embarassed when she said ‘’ I don’t know 1 bit what you are saying’’

Shruthi the loudmouthed explained the whole thing & both of them burst into laughter . Seeing them the whole class also started to laugh & we couldn’t help ourselves & we also started to laugh. Just then the principle entered the class only to find us laughing. Caught us again we thought but he didnt say anything . That’s the way he is we thought. He went on with his boring lectures. I never even bothered to listen what he was saying. Suddenly he called out my name. It was like a bolt from the blue for me

‘’ Yes , sir’’

‘’ You are not paying attention in the class are you’’

‘’ Yes sir I am ‘’

‘’ then why don’t you answer my question’’

‘’ Sure sir’’

‘’ What is the other name .......... ,.,. ?’’

‘’ phenol , sir’’

‘’ Okay , how many carbon ........ ?’’

‘’ 6, sir ‘’

‘’’ Why don’t we add ....... ?’’

‘’ That is because water..... ‘’

‘’ What is the shape....... ?’’

‘’ Tetrahedron..... ‘’

This continued , & I felt I was in some quiz answering in a rapid fire round.

‘’ Why don’t you ........ ?’’

‘’ Pardon sir’’

‘’ That’s it this shows that you were not paying attention in class. Sit down & try to be more attentive in class from now on ‘’ How absurd I thought I answered 9 of his 10 questions & probably could have answered the last one too if at all I had heard of it. Any way I sat down

‘’ My god macha , how did you answer them man . you are ulimate’’ koji remarked I suppose this remark made me more happy ,than what the princi had said

After class I walked up to nilima ‘’ I am so sorry we just heard your name as nivea & so I just .. ‘’ . It’s okay she smiled.

‘’ Human’s tend to make mistakes’’ how holy I thought

‘’ Aah my name is vikram you can call me vicky’’

‘’& my name is Nilima Mukherjee & I am from New delhi ‘’

‘’ooh , New delhi I see‘’

‘’will you be my friend I dont have many comming from delhi’’

‘’ sure .’’ That’s what I had on my mind.’’ then hows the feeling comming to bangalore‘’

‘’ The place is fine &..... blah , blah.....’’

We kept on chatting & never knew whent it became 5 pm

‘’ Oh god it’s already late & I think I should be leaving now’’ nilima looked worried

‘’ Ya it’s getting late for me as well , see ya tommorrow’’

‘’ Bye’’

I was releived & a hell lot of it to. I had just spoken to this girl to whom I wanted to speak from past 3 days for about 1 hour or so. I was feeling tired . the only thought of cycling back home made me even tired Some how I pulled in myself & reached home .

‘’ what’s new man ? second day & already so late. what macha?’’ anil grumbeled

‘’ Hey man i’’l meet you later & tell you guys everything’’

‘’okay guy seeya later bye’’ The moment I reached my adda the gang surrounded me ‘’ ‘’ what ‘s it guy we heard something interesting happened to you it seems’’

‘’ well nothing , I just talked to that girl ‘’

‘’ wow man ‘’ the gang was surprised

‘’ what’s her name ?’’

‘’ where does she stay ?’’

‘’ got her phone no. ? ’’

‘’ has she got any younger sisters ’’ the gang was really curios

‘’ cool it guys . i’ll answer you one by one. her name is nilima mukherjee & she is from delhi’’

‘’what ra bengali babe ‘’

‘’ to kya hau’’

‘’ kal use puch, kya woh Satyajit Ray ko jante hai’’

‘’ you guys have no work other than to comment’’ I was angry at them

‘’ no baba we were just joking, don’t take it seriously’’

I was getting slight shivers & I took leave of my friends & went home. I read some magazines & slept off. Mom woke me up only to find my body burning. I had fever

‘’I told you that you don’t have the stamina & still you wanted to cycle all the way to your college . don’t touch the cycle from tommorrow . go by bus , its safe & comfortable’’ dad sounded really serious

I just pretended to be fast asleep . I somehow wanted to avoid his wrath. Mom came in the room carrying a glass of some dark- brown steaming liquid which I was supposed to drink . I really hated that stuff , but any fuss now would only mean more trouble & so I gulped it down . Mom was really surprised when I did that . she just smiled & walked off. I never was so desperate to get better whenever I fell sick. I am a firm believer of ‘’Rest untill you become best’’ . but I wanted to get well soon so that I could attend college , well for a different reason but who would see the other reason. Three days on bed. only milk . food was only idli’s & boiled warm waters for drinking. my mouth would water when tans would eat all the goodies in front of me. I could only think ‘’ Every dog has its day’’. It was around 6 in the evening when tans woke me up .

‘’There is a call for you’’

‘’who is it tell him I am not feeling well’’ I yelled

‘’are you sure , it’s some girl & she says her name is nivea ‘’

I jumped out of my bed and raced towards the telephone , grabbed the receiver

‘’Hi ‘’

‘’How are you ? .Are you feeling well or not. It’s been over 3 days & you haven’t come to college . you are missing a lot of portions.... ‘’ she went on In the background I could here some music

probably she was playing some music

‘’I am running temperature & Wait a sec from where did you get my number from’’ I asked

‘’ From the office ‘’

‘’& how did you do that’’

‘’ simple I said I wanted your number & the office boy gave me everything including your address’’

‘’ fine ‘’

‘’ then when are you comming to college ‘’

‘’ maybe in a day or so ‘’

‘’make it fast na It’s so boring in class’’

‘’ what ‘s that sound ‘’

‘’ oh , that’s my sister’’

‘’ elder or younger’’

‘’ younger of course she is just in 6 th class’’

‘’ oh I see , what’s her name’’

‘’ her name is Sayonee’’

‘’Eh , wha a name’’

‘’Ya , it’s my greatgrandma’s name’’

‘’ And what about yours’’

‘’ no, it isn’t any one’s name. It’s that we had a uncle & it was he who named me’’

‘’ Maybe he was sick when he named you’’

‘’ you said something’’

‘’not exactly , I just said isn’t your name too long ‘’

‘’ ya, my people call me nilu ‘’

‘’ Can I call you nilu’’

‘’okay ‘’

‘’then,’’

‘then , what you should say’’

‘’then , nothing ‘’

‘’ Okay then bye meet you later in college ‘’

‘’ bye’’

Tans was just standing near the door. probably she was just monitoring my call.

‘’ who is that girl’’ she enquired

‘’well her name is Nilima mukherjee & she’s from delhi . has joined my college & i’ll tell you what she is very pretty’’

‘’ big deal , go & take rest now’’ she grumbled

‘’ I culdn’t sleep immediately. I knew it was infatuation & had to get over it as soon as possible;’’ soon I had dosed

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