Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV
program Battlestar Galactica are the creations of SciFi,
Left Unspoken ~ Apollo’s Lady
They rebelled.
They evolved.
They look and feel Human.
Some are programmed to think they are human.
There are many copies.
And they have a plan!
Lee didn’t talk to either the Commander or the Colonel. He barely talked to anyone unless it was in the line of duty. No one would describe him as surly or abrupt, merely quiet these days. The surge of confidence he’d felt immediately following Boomer’s betrayal had seemed to vanish as quickly as it came.
He’d tried to talk to his father about the situation, his mutiny and later escape with Roslin. His father had as always, silenced him. His dad only seemed to be interested in talking if he initiated it, not Lee. Lee wasn’t sure his father ever heard what he had to say. William Adama seemed to have a knack for shutting his only remaining son out.
He supposed he hadn’t been meant to hear this conversation. They didn’t know he was anywhere near the vicinity. Lee woke that morning and decided to risk a private visit to his father. It had taken him all morning to summon the courage to follow through on the decision. Maybe he should have made an appointment?
“It was wrong.” The somber voice of his father rang through the doorway. “He committed mutiny and we just let him get away with it. He should have been executed or at the very least, spent the rest of his natural life behind bars.”
“You’d execute your own son?” Saul Tigh had seen many sides of this man. He was his Commander, friend, almost a brother. The deep seeded disappointment in his son bothered him. These two had lived too long on the precipice and had come too far recently to lose it all now. When Adama went to Kobol to retrieve Roslin and Lee, Tigh thought things were forgiven. He’d heard from witnesses that Adama had warmly embraced Lee, as if forgiven. Frak, Tigh had forgiven Lee a long time ago. Somehow the anger in the elder Adama had come back. Saul didn’t know how or why but the damage was done. The situation had to be handled carefully or both Adamas might crash. This wouldn’t help anyone. He certainly wanted nothing to do with command of the fleet anymore. He’d had his taste.
William Adama was reflecting on the question. Their unknown observer held his own breath frightened at the time it was taking his father to respond. He knew his entire future lay in the reply.
“No, but he should probably be locked up on the Astral Queen for as long as humanity continues to survive.” There was no humor to Adama’s response.
Lee was stunned and shaken. His father wished him a fate worse than death. He flashed back to the agonizing time he had already spent locked in the brig. He knew if it came to that, he’d rather be dead. He slipped away from the door. It was too much. He’d actually been hopeful this morning but now it seemed, there was none. The forgiveness or understanding his father seemed to have once held for him was gone. Perhaps it had been a simple weakness of mind from the various medications he’d been taking to heal at the time? Perhaps Lee had done something unknowingly to reawaken the disappointment in his father.
He felt like he was finally an orphan. His father held no love for him, no forgiveness, no understanding. Didn’t he realize Lee had had no choice in his actions? He’d been pushed into corners at every turn with everyone counting on him to save their collective “asses”, as the president had once said. No matter what their personal relationship had been, he had always respected his father’s command ability. Recent events were causing him to doubt this now. Hadn’t Starbuck regaled him with stories of his father’s own insubordinate youth? Had his father now lived so long at the top, that he could no longer see the entire picture? The Cylons had destroyed their old world. The only thing they had to build on was the Articles of Colonization and yet his father had seen fit to bend them as needed for his military ways. The president shouldn’t have been arrested for one error in judgment and Tigh should have never been allowed to get to the level of alcoholism that sank the fleet after his father’s attack.
Lee returned to his bunk and stretched out, dejected. He hadn’t been wrong. He had done nothing to spite his father; he had only done what he saw as necessary at the time. He hadn’t even been given a chance to explain this to his father. He decided he had to stop using that word. His father didn’t exist anymore. He didn’t care for his son, so Lee didn’t hang his hopes on him anymore either. It seemed he would remain the CAG. He would do what he had to for that role. It seemed all he had left.
Lee rolled off his bunk. He straightened the newly rumpled sheets and left the quarters. He walked a few steps down the hall and stopped outside a different door. To the left of the door was a plaque. “CAG’s Quarters.” He grabbed the handle. ‘No better time!’ He entered the darkened room that had belonged to his long dead, but far more experienced and less prone to mutiny, predecessor.
** ~ **
Lee had missed the rest of the conversation in the Commander’s office.
“Humanity owes a huge portion of its continued existence to that kid, us included.” Tigh’s voice was uncharacteristically kind.
Adama’s lips tightened, emphasizing his typically stern face. He drew in a long, slow breath. “I know.”
Tigh opted to push his Commander, something he normally saved for crew. “I don’t suppose it will ever be discussed openly, but he was right.”
Adama’s eyes flashed. “He held a GUN to your head!”
“Yes, he did, but let’s be honest. Even at his worst, you and I know he’d never have used it. I couldn’t see that then but I do now.” He shook his head. “The truth is Roslin pissed us off and we reacted like spoiled kids.”
Adama was quiet for some time before he replied. “It was ego.”
“And Lee knows it.” Tigh said the dreaded reality aloud. “Your son now knows you’re not perfect.”
“He never thought I was perfect.” Adama brushed the comment off.
“Maybe not as a father, but respect for his Commander poured from him.” He watched his friend, who was now very guarded. “You seemed fine when you went to Kobol. What happened?”
“Ego.” Adama had no delay.
“What?” Tigh didn’t understand.
“I wanted him to come to me to apologize. He said it wasn’t about us. That wasn’t an apology. Sure, I understand what happened, but deep down, I needed my son to apologize. I needed to know I was still number one.”
“He hasn’t?”
Adama laughed softly. “We haven’t spoken about it at all. If we’re being honest here, I suppose I should apologize to him.” He was silent, under his breath he then added. “I’m tried of always needing to apologize to my son.”
Tigh opened his mouth to reply, but had absolutely nothing he could say. This situation belonged to father and son. He wondered if locking them both in the brig, forcing them to talk to each other would help. Could any two men be more alike? As stubborn? He shook his head and smiled, he’d take his alcohol dependence any day.
** ~ **
Lee ran a finger across the desk. He grimaced as he watched the welt of dust form. He looked at his finger and groaned, wondering how much worse it would look with his dress gloves on. He didn’t feel comfortable in this room. It had been Ripper’s, a good CAG. Certainly, he had the right to be here, but it felt like he was grave robbing.
He’d stayed in the pilot’s bunks until now. No one had questioned him. They all assumed it was because he wanted to get to know his new men. They might never have guessed he stayed there simply because he felt he didn’t deserve CAG’s quarters. He was barely a Captain. Captains don’t make CAG. The only reason he sported the title was that he happened to be the highest ranked surviving pilot. What did it mean? All the superior pilots had died. He hadn’t been ready to accept the title in more than just name and workload. He never truly felt like the Commander of the Air Group. He felt like a substitute, waiting for the real CAG to return. Part of him longed to be just one of the pilots. Ripper wasn’t coming back. The job was his and it was time he started feeling like Galactica’s one true CAG.
Now that he didn’t have to be Bill Adama’s son he felt able to concentrate on being Captain Lee Adama, youngest CAG on Galactica, possibly in the fleet. He smiled at the challenge. He let the rush of adrenaline wash over him. He had a chance to prove himself and this time it was for Lee Adama, not an attempt to fight his father’s shadow. He wondered if the crew would see a change in him and stop the comparisons and biting remarks?
He wasn’t interested in anything but the desk. Ripper’s personal effects were still there, untouched, but in true military fashion, there wasn’t much. He removed a few items and placed them on the bed. He fetched a towel from the head and wiped off months of dust. It seemed to Lee, like he was beginning his third life.
Lee opened the drawers and began sorting files that could still be of use and formed an even larger stack of personnel files that would be no longer required. He wouldn’t destroy them, but there wasn’t time to dwell on the dead anymore. There were simply too many. He soon became engrossed in the work and barely noted that time had passed. When his body called out for a break, he glanced at his watched and noted that he would scarcely have time to retrieve his flight suit. There would be no time for dinner before CAP.
Changing into his suit with all haste, he ran through the causeways toward the deck. Thankfully the pilots were kept close. He was alone in the hall, so when two men stepped in front of him, he stopped. They were dressed in orange coveralls, but he didn’t recognize them. “Can I help you?”
The larger of the two men smiled. Lee held in a grimace. His breath smelled and he was unkempt. Lee figured they must be on loan from one of
the other ships.
“As a matter of fact, you can help us out Captain Adama.”
The man’s partner took a step forward. Lee sensed danger and stepped back, at the same time preparing for hand-to-hand combat. “What can I do then?”
The speaking man’s smile grew wider. “Don’t struggle!” He lurched forward but was able to grab only a hint of sleeve.
Lee wound back and let loose with a few powerful punches. He had worried about the men in front of him and hadn’t thought to check his six. From somewhere, three more men appeared. One pushed a laundry cart. The other two surprised Lee and grabbed his arms, incapacitating him. The smaller of the original two men stepped forward, now brandishing a syringe. “We told you not to struggle.” Without any preparation, he stabbed the needle into Lee’s undefended neck.
Lee immediately knew he was in trouble. His vision swam and his body seemed to turn to lead. He couldn’t think or speak and was even beginning to doubt his hearing. He could have sworn he heard them say, “let’s get his old man now.” Lee knew that had to be wrong. Lee had no father.
Adama was finally going to return to CIC. After Tigh left, he’d spent a great deal of time in thought. That afternoon, he’d said out loud things he hadn’t been willing to admit until then. The truth wasn’t always pretty and it had a way of refusing to be denied. If he was honest, he was more upset with himself than Lee. Lee was everything he had ever hoped his son would be and more, but he could take no direct credit. Sure, Lee shared his genetics, but Adama had failed Lee as a father in so many ways. He thought of his own relationship with his father. It was so different. Joseph Adama had supported him in every conceivable way. He had never failed to let his son know he was proud, even when Bill had joined the military. He had never thought of himself as selfish, but now it couldn’t be denied. How else could he have gone so wrong as a father to Lee and Zak?
He knew the reason he couldn’t come right out and tell his son how proud he was. He was afraid to see the truth. Every time he should have been there for his son, the fleet took precedence. Lee had become the success he was because he fought for it. He had risen to the top because he fought his father and the associated reputation at every step and every turn. With that kind of history, how would they ever forge a relationship? It didn’t help him that Lee seemed sensitive to his words. It seemed he could never say the right thing. He wondered if other fathers were able to read their son’s minds. Was there some secret class other fathers took? Why had no one shared this information with him?
The phone rang. “Yes.” He answered sternly. “No, he’s not here.” “Page him.”
He hung up annoyed. How ironic was it that someone might think Lee was in his father’s office?
A few seconds later, the announcement came across. “Pass the word for Captain Adama to report to the flight deck ASAP.”
Adama finished stacking the final reports on his desk. He didn’t really feel like CIC, but he knew he needed to be there. The phone rang again. “No. I have not seen him. Send someone to quarters.” “No one saw him leave?” “Fine, I’ll check myself.” Frak! Where was Lee? Had he decided to mutiny again? He strode angrily through the corridors toward officer quarters. There was no choice this time. Lee would have to be punished. He found Lee’s bunk empty. Hotdog reported having seen him near the CAG’s office.
Adama pounded on the door but didn’t wait for a reply. He charged in. The room wasn’t empty.
“Hello, Commander.” A man stood in the shadows. “How perfectly predictable? You came yourself. Looking for your son?”
Adama felt a chill from the man’s voice spread down his spine. “Who are you? What are you doing here?” The man laughed haughtily and stepped forward. He was tall and gaunt. Adama didn’t recall seeing him on Galactica before.
“That is not important right now. What is important is your son. Would you not agree?”
“I’d rather know what you’re doing on my ship and in the CAG’s office.” Adama remained calm on the outside. Inside, he was agreeing with the stranger before him.
The man’s bony hand reached out and in his grasp was a photo. Adama took it. It was a picture of Lee, asleep or unconscious. He forced himself not to react. “How did you come by this picture?”
“Look closer.”
Adama did as he was told and this time noticed a clock and calendar in the background. The clock was within an hour and the calender for that day. “What’s your game? I have things to do and no time for this.”
“You have no time for your son’s life? That’s a shame. I really hoped the rumors were wrong.” He took the picture back and confidently moved past Adama. “The problem is, he saw my men so now we’ll have to kill him for sure.” The man reached for the hatch.
“What do you want?” Adama asked finally.
The gaunt man smiled maliciously. “Not much really. Your command code.”
Adama laughed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. What command code?”
The sinister man stepped in close to Adama. “Don’t play me for stupid. I know what I am doing. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. I promise you. Your son would prefer the easy way. Give me the code.”
Adama knew the jig was up on the code. He wouldn’t deny it further. “No.”
“Then you choose the hard way.” Another man stepped out from the head. He held a large gun and pointed it squarely at Adama. “Come with me, Bill. May I call you Bill? I have a feeling we are going to be spending some quality time together.”
“You can’t think you can take me by gunpoint off my own ship?” Adama was finding the whole situation more and more incredible. “You think no one will notice my absence or Lee’s?”
“The Captain’s absence has already been noted and see, no panic. His mutinous track record has aided us there.”
“What about me?” Adama asked coldly.
The man smiled again. “It will be interesting, but I think we have planned for all possibilities. I am not worried. Are you coming or shall we simply kill your son now?”
Adama stepped to the door. “Let’s get this over with.” He had no idea what was going to happen next, but it seemed like going along was the only way to get any answers.
The man also moved to the door. He stopped short of stepping over the threshold. “Bill, do not try anything stupid. If we are not to your son’s location in a few short minutes, they have orders to slit his throat.”
“Lead on!” Adama’s voice was as cold as his aggressor.
As they walked, Adama felt himself wondering just how long this little attack had been planned. The timing was perfect. The halls were empty and they used obsolete back routes. He knew his ship well though. He knew they were headed toward the far cargo holds. He knew even with their best search efforts, it would be some time before the marines got to this portion of the ship. He knew he needed to buy as much time as possible.
They entered the farthest hold and wound through the boxes. Adama held his breath as he realized the kidnappers had constructed a fake wall. The average marine would never see it. He noted it only because it was his job to know his own ship. They ducked through a door and he found himself facing a second wall, this one constructed of glass. They pushed him toward a chair and when he was seated, they tied him to it at the wrists and ankles.
“Isn’t this a bit dramatic?” Adama questioned, lifting his hands as far as they would go.
“No, Bill. The drama has not even begun to start.” The gaunt man pointed through the glass. Lee was being dragged in. He was still unconscious and now he was blindfolded. They laid him on the floor and used chain to lash him to the cargo stays.
Adama held his breath, wondering what was happening. “Why is he unconscious?”
“He has been given a drug. As soon as we begin, he will waken, but everything will be just a bit fuzzy, including his pain.”
“What is it you expect to achieve?” Adama asked again, staring at his son prone on the floor.
“I told you. I want your command code.”
“But what good will it do you? What do you expect to do with it? You can’t think you can take over this ship?” Adama reasoned.
“Bill, look how far we have come. Don’t you think we can take control of the ship? I would do it now, but all your crew would have to do is enter the lock out code. We would be helpless until we got your command code to release them.”
“So you think this will work if you have the code? My crew won’t let you get that far.” Adama spoke with definite resolve.
“We have come this far.” He laughed. “We built a fake room right under your nose.” He smiled sickly. “I think our chances are just fine.”
Adama swallowed hard and looked at his son. Lee’s head moved slightly back and forth against the hard floor. He was dressed only in his tanks and boxers. Adama forced his face to give none of his emotions away as he watched a man pull Lee’s tanks up. Next he attached large clips to various locations on Lee’s prone body. Inside Adama allowed a small burst of pride. The man struggled to find skin to use. His son had a lean, muscular body. This would not be easy. “What do I call you?”
“Pardon?” The lean man asked.
“You have me at a disadvantage. If we’re going to have this conversation, I should be able to call you something.” Adama was trying for any information he could.
“That attitude saddens me, Bill. I was just about to ask you to spare your son this trauma and give me the code now. Are you sure we need to prolong this experience?” He waited seconds for a response but got none. “You can call me Zeus.” He laughed to himself. “Of course, I know that is how people refer to you, being Apollo’s father and the current leader of the fleet, but soon it will be my title, so let us use it now.”
Adama attempted sarcasm. “You intend to become father to my son?”
Zeus leaned in close. “There will not be anything left of your son to be a father to if you do not stop this now. Say the word.”
“Don’t you mean the code?” Adama gruffly asked.
“I have heard ice runs through your veins, Bill but I am impressed that you are prepared to watch your son be tortured.”
Adama spoke in a controlled, cold voice. “Understand this Zeus. If you proceed with this plan you can expect one thing and one thing only. You will die. If you hurt my son, there will be nowhere in the fleet you can hide. I will hunt you down and kill you with my bare hands.”
Zeus said nothing. He merely smiled and waved his hand toward the glass. A different man emerged by Lee’s side with a control unit and immediately flipped a switch. Electric currents ran through Lee’s body. The only noise was the sizzle of current. Lee’s body pitched into the air. After twenty seconds, the current stopped only to be repeated again a few moments later. After several minutes of this repeated action, Zeus turned back to Adama. “The code?”
“You’re a dead man.”
Lee was vaguely aware of movement. He fought to remember what had brought on this numbness but his mind didn’t want to work as directed. He tried moving his limbs. He couldn’t tell if it was working or if he just thought they were. He then tried his head. It seemed to be moving slightly. He could feel cold. Was he on a floor? Suddenly his body was racked with pain. After what seemed like forever it stopped but then resumed again. Over and over again it occurred. He’d lost track of the number of times. He longed to scream out but couldn’t bring his brain to coordinate his mouth. Maybe this was some sick dream? What was it going to take to make this nightmare end?
** ~ **
“Where the frak is he?” Tigh hollered across CIC.
“No one’s seen him.”
Tigh gripped the edge of the command console wondering if Lee Adama had finally decided the battle wasn’t worth it and bailed. “Check Colonial One and see if he’s there.”
“Then let’s check the frakin’ shuttles and see if he left on one.” Tigh demanded.
Several long minutes slipped by in tense silence. “A shuttle to the Rising Star reports possibly
having transported Captain Adama about an hour ago.”
** ~ **
Adama couldn’t have fathomed a worse scenario in his mind. He was being forced to balance the torture of his son against the survival of the fleet. No matter how inhuman it was to experience, he couldn’t save his son. He couldn’t turn command of the Galactica over to this lunatic terrorist. He didn’t think he would ever be able to move his face again. It was locked solid into the neutral expression he’d assumed to watch them abuse his son.
Zeus interrupted his thoughts. “What is it going to take to make you feel something for your son, Bill?” He nodded and a man entered with a hose. He turned it on.
Lee was immediately drenched with water. Even from this distance, Adama could see the goose bumps rising on Lee’s exposed skin. The water was cold. Again the shocks continued, water increasing the intensity and magnifying it across Lee’s skin. Lee’s face clenched and his mouth dropped open as his head jerked back. The pain didn’t seem to stop when the current was cut off. It seemed to linger now. Lee’s lip began to tremble and his jaw jerked as if trying to speak, or scream. No voice emerged.
Adama, whose eyes looked forward, saw only the past. He’d hadn’t been able to be there was Lee was born. Caroline always said Lee’s birth was his first example of his attempt to control his own destiny.
He wasn’t due for another month. Had Lee come when planned, Adama would have
been there for his birth. As it was, his
leave couldn’t begin until his new son was three days old. Caroline always told him he was being silly,
but he knew in his heart, he had already damaged his relationship with his
son.
His own father had met him at the airstrip when he landed. Joseph Adama was thrilled to be a grandfather
and looked every bit the part. He hugged
his son and stuffed a cigar into his hand.
“Congratulations, Son! You’re a
father now! There’s no greater purpose
or thrill in life. I promise.”
He’d been swept up in the flurry of activity in their
small base house. There were so many
people around offering congratulations that he had barely held his son. It wasn’t until late that night, as Caroline
slept, that he went to Lee’s cradle and watched his son sleep. The crib annoyed him. He had told Caroline he wanted to build the
cradle that would protect their child.
She’d cried and promised him the privilege. When the baby came early, his father had gone
out and purchased the crib and assembled it before Caroline got home. He knew it was the right thing to do, but he
harbored angry feelings over the disappointment.
He cautiously brought the infant to his chest. Lee was so tiny. It took only one hand to hold him in
place. Real life was nothing like his
‘practice’. He’d been wadding up a towel
for months, pretending it was his child.
Tigh had caught him once and although he never let him live it down in
private, he hadn’t made the embarrassing situation public. He said so many things to that damn towel. Now, words escaped him.
He softly allowed the babe to fall back into his hands so
he could look him over more closely. Lee
had woken, but didn’t cry. Father and
son simply stared at each other. When he
later told Caroline about the situation, she reminded him that Lee’s eyes
couldn’t focus at this tender age. Adama
nodded, but didn’t accept her comments.
He knew his son better. He knew
Lee had been watching him and understood full well that he was looking at the
eyes of his father. He knew then and
there that his son was special. Lee
would always be ahead of his time. He
would always have some deep insight. It
intimidated his father, then and now.
Adama spoke softly to his son. He shared his hopes and dreams for the tiny
boy. He was overwhelmed at how much love
he felt for his offspring in such a short span of time. He wondered if hearts ever broke from
excessive love?
Lee seemed to understand his father’s words. His head would nod or turn ever so
slightly. His lower lip dropped and
moved as well. Adama was certain his son
was telling him something important.
Lee’s lips moved like they had that first day. In his mind, Adama envisioned all the things his son might possibly be saying. Was he begging for mercy? Simply screaming in pain? Was he cursing his aggressors? Laughing at them? Could he possibly be calling for his father? Did he know Adama was near, witnessing the whole ordeal?
** ~ **
Tigh debated contacting the Commander. He should know about Lee’s disappearance. He couldn’t bring himself to do it. Adama was just starting to understand the need to open up to his son. Tigh wasn’t stupid. Adama would assume the same thing he had. Lee was running, chucking it all.
Tigh scowled. “So we have no idea where he is?”
She shook her head. “Sir, if I may, Captain Adama is fairly well known in the fleet. It wouldn’t be easy for him to get off the ship without someone noticing him.”
“What are you suggesting?” Tigh asked, truly interested in her thoughts. He wondered if she knew more about this disappearance. He had long believed she’d known more about Roslin’s escape from the brig then she ever admitted.
She cleared her throat. “I was wondering if we shouldn’t initiate a search of the ship.” From the glare Tigh shot her, she wanted to run back to her station. She held her ground.
“You think something’s wrong?” He asked, sounding almost reasonable. He had known Lee Adama since he was only a few weeks old. He owed him the benefit of the doubt. Hell, he owed the old man that at the very least. He turned to Captain McKay. “Order the marines to search the ship. FIND LEE ADAMA!”
** ~ **
Lee’s chains had been released. His body still continued to twitch from residual currents. He rolled himself onto his side and pulled his legs to his chest. Even wrapping his arms around his legs brought him no comfort. He was cold, so cold. Shivers replaced the twitching. He felt a presence draw near.
“Rest while you can, Adama. The next round begins soon enough.” To add insult to injury, he shoved Lee’s head against the floor.
Whether it was the electrical current or the time itself, Lee’s mind was beginning to clear. He coughed and whispered. “What do you want from me?”
The man laughed. “It seems your blood.”
** ~ **
Adama watched his son curl into a ball. He hoped it was instinct and not awareness. It was easier to deal with his son’s torture if he knew Lee was oblivious to his environment.
“Round one ends in a draw.” Zeus stated. “Who will win round two? You, Bill or me? Certainly one person loses, your son. How do you feel about that?”
Adama said nothing. He stared at his son, willing him his own strength.
“Say the word or shall I say numbers and this all ends for him. You can ease his pain.” Zeus held his hands out as if it was a casual conversation.
“Why not just torture me?” Adama knew the answer, but he had to hear it.
Zeus laughed and pulled a gun from a belt holster. “You want me to use this on you? You and I both know you would go to your grave before you betrayed your oath. It is so predictable.”
“Try me.” He challenged.
Zeus laughed again. “A desperate attempt to save your son, Bill? I expect better from you. How do you do it? How do you stare at your son? I knew it was risky.”
Adama was curious of the admission. “Risky? I thought you were so confident of your success. Everything was planned out?” Adama’s voice was harsh.
“There was only one potential flaw to my plan.”
“And that was?” Adama assumed it was no longer a concern.
“The rumors.”
Adama was tired of begging for information, but bit. “What rumors?”
“That you really do not care about your son.”
It was Adama’s turn to laugh. “Really? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I’d have to be heartless not to love my son.”
“And?” Zeus opened a jacket pocket and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it quickly. He’d been denying himself far too long and this banter with Adama was growing old. The only reason he continued was in the hopes that Adama would reveal some chink in his armor. He took a long drag and released the smoke. “It still remains to be seen. I thought fathers would give their lives for their children. That is what all the books say. You. You watch your son be beaten and do nothing. You did not even grimace once.”
“You don’t really think I’m going to give you anything you want?”
“Such pride and dedication… and at only the cost of your son. Bravo!” Zeus clapped.
The men returned to Lee’s jail. One hulk stuffed a cloth into Lee’s mouth and then tied a rope to secure it. Not only would Lee’s mouth dry up and his words be muffled, the rope would most likely burn his face. Adama could tell that already.
Zeus knelt in front of Adama and stared at him. “Is the pride and dedication really worth more than your son’s life? That is my only variable. I am afraid the rumors are true. That worries me.”
Adama thought to himself. It worries me too.
The marines had begun their search of Galactica for the errant Captain. Tigh had summoned his courage and walked to Adama’s quarters. He had to tell him some time. He knocked on the portal and waited for permission to enter. It wasn’t forthcoming. He knocked again, somewhat louder. He pushed on the hatch and it gave way. He stepped into the empty room and called out. “Commander?” In a few seconds, he added. “Bill?”
“Where the frak are you?” Suddenly an idea hit him and he smiled. He thought back to the conversation the two men had shared that morning. “Of course!” Adama had finally decided to talk to his son. They had gone somewhere to be alone and talk uninterrupted. It was so obvious to him. He knew Bill would find somewhere very private. He returned to the CIC with a lighter step.
Lieutenant Gaeta seemed concerned. “Sir?”
Tigh ignored his concern. “I’m sure the Captain is with the Commander.”
Tigh was annoyed at being questioned by his junior officer. It was still too close to recent events. He had no desire to relive his command experiences from their time at Kobol. “I’m sure he didn’t hear it.”
“Didn’t hear it, Sir?”
Tigh turned to face him. “Lieutenant, are there not locations on this ship where the speaker system is not working?”
“Then it is entirely possible the summons was not heard and Lieutenant. Call off the search.”
“But Captain Adama wouldn’t miss his CAP…”
“If the COMMANDER orders him to, he would!” Tigh challenged
** ~ **
Lee’s mind was sharpening. He wasn’t about to provide these men with any of his blood. He calmed himself and tried to determine how many captors he had. He felt the presence of two for sure. There had been four or five, but they might be elsewhere, thinking him under control. Under normal circumstances, he trusted his training as a warrior to lead him through this. He could take two men easily. His body’s current state and the unknown number of men worried him. He didn’t like the uncertainty but wasn’t about to remain in captivity.
He centered his thoughts and calmed his nerves, waiting for the right moment to strike. He didn’t wait long. Two sets of feet surrounded him. He sensed movement and felt a grasp at his arm. He pushed his body up and swung wildly. He felt the impact with his target reverberate down his arm. He prayed his strength wouldn’t fail him. He continued in a wide arc and missed his next target. The gag in his mouth made it difficult to draw in proper breaths and his blindfold continued to darken his world. He was fading fast. He gathered himself for another run at his missed target, but he didn’t have time. Two more sets of arms grabbed his own.
** ~ **
Adama held his breath as he watched his son move his body ever so subtly. He knew on instinct Lee was planning an escape. He smiled at his son’s bravery and yet cringed. He knew it was only going to cause Lee further pain. As much faith as he had in his son’s fighting abilities, he knew Lee was too weak to take on four men. In a sick way, he was glad he couldn’t see his son’s expressive eyes in all this. It would have been too much.
Zeus laughed when Lee sprang into action. “I have been waiting for this. Oh! Good shot! He is quite a fighter that son of yours.” He turned from the fight and eyed Adama. “Did you know he was going to do that? We did. We were waiting for it.” He looked back through the glass as a hulk delivered a solid blow to Lee’s abdomen. Lee doubled over but was pulled upright and a second strike was administered.
Adama gulped and closed his eyes for just a moment, as Lee’s arms were pulled forward and bound. When he opened them again, Lee was being tied to a rope from the ceiling. His bound hands were pulled high over his head. As if reading Adama’s mind, they pulled Lee’s blindfold off as well. One of the men stepped back and picked up a long, thick metal pipe. Adama bit his tongue to hold the gasp that threatened to escape as the man proceeded to beat Lee’s leg with the pipe. With each blow, Lee’s body flung backward and even the gag could not hide the agony that reared across Lee’s face and now through his eyes as well.
“He has brought this on himself now, don’t you think? We cannot go having him escape. He is too important.” Zeus was back at Adama’s side.
The men continued their assault on the helpless Captain. They alternated between the pipe and their own fists, striking various defenseless parts of his body. Adama couldn’t even fathom the pain Lee must feel. His heart threatened to implode. He closed his eyes again for a moment and saw his own path clearly. There was only one way to save Lee and the fleet. He had only to determine how it would happen.
** ~ **
Lee had no idea how long the beating had gone on. He’d lost track. He didn’t even feel his body anymore. It simply hurt too much. He wanted to beg and scream but both the gag and his still intact pride prevented him. With each progressive blow, he had felt his body break in more and more places. He was going to die. That was certain. Would anyone have the decency to at least tell him why he was dying like this? They stopped.
“I got to hand it to ya, Captain…” the man said as he snapped Lee’s head back. “I can’t believe you’re still with us. I’d almost think of taking this gag off, just to hear what you’re thinkin’. Does it still hurt? Can you feel it?” He did remove Lee’s gag.
Another man approached. From the corner of his eye, Lee could see the shiny surface of a syringe. The man smiled sickly. “This will help ya… again.” He laughed and the other man laughed as well, releasing Lee’s head.
“Yeah, stay awake and endure more pain!” The man jabbed the needle into Lee’s neck for a second time.
Lee winced. There was question in his eyes and the men saw it. “This will take the edge off your pain. We’re not finished with you yet.”
The first man spun Lee around. “Hey, cut him down. I got another idea.”
Lee felt another small measure of hope. He prayed his hands would somehow work if released. His training hadn’t left him. He’d been surveying his jail the whole time. It didn’t escape his notice that the four men carried side arms. He was obviously being held as part of some game having to do with his father. He corrected himself, the Commander. He wasn’t about to let it continue.
** ~ **
Two hours had gone by and there had still been no word from either Apollo or the Commander. Tigh had done his best to occupy his mind with reports but they failed him now.
He watched Lieutenant Gaeta from the corner of his eye. He loathed admitting he was wrong but at this point, he had no choice. “Lieutenant, get those marines searching again. Tell them to search every nook of this ship.” He looked away and added quietly to himself. “The Adama’s have had as much time as they are going to get to reconcile. If it hasn’t happened by now, it never will.”
** ~ **
Adama had no idea how long he’d been tied to the chair. Time had long ago ceased to matter. Zeus had stepped out a few minutes ago and Lee had been left alone on the floor in his cell as well. Adama couldn’t keep his eyes off his son. Lee didn’t move and he wondered what the injection had been. He knew Zeus was providing this time alone to force Adama to do exactly this, agonize over his decision.
When had he become the stereotypical military father? He wasn’t the child of one, so when had the instincts overtaken him? His father had told him being a father was life’s greatest purpose and thrill. Obviously, his father had never flown a viper nor tried to parent Lee Adama.
That first night had scared Adama. As he held Lee, he felt like he saw all the
wisdom of the universe in his infant son’s intense blue eyes. In his own mind, he saw challenge. ‘What can you teach me, old man?’ He had literally pulled on his warrior mantel
and decided to win the war against his son.
He was his father and damn it, he would learn from him. He’d taken his son into bed and laid him
between father and mother. By morning,
he’d calmed down and written off his disturbing thoughts of the previous night
as nerves.
He spent the next two weeks doting on his son and
wife. They were a happy family. He and Caroline had once strolled through the
base in the evening, he proud to be in the military. Now, pushing a stroller, the pride on those
walks came from being a father. No
matter what his military career had been or would be,
he had a true legacy now, a son.
The bliss ended when Bill was abruptly recalled to
duty. His leave cut short by a full two
weeks. Caroline had been brave about
it. If she cried, she hadn’t shown
him. In between feedings, she washed his
things and packed his bags, leaving him as much time as possible with baby Lee.
Hours before he was to leave, he sat on the back step,
holding his sleeping son in the cradle of his arm. He spoke softly to the babe. “I’m leaving now. I have to.
This is my job. You’re just going
to have to accept that now. I suspect
I’m going to miss a lot of important days in your life, but that’s what a
warrior has to do. A warrior understands
that sacrifices must be made for the benefit of everyone. Someday, you’ll be a warrior too and it will
make more sense. Until then, you’ll have
to be my littlest warrior and protect your mom.” He kissed his son’s head and returned him to
the car seat. It never occurred to him
that he had just placed a heavy burden on his infant son.
It was seven months before Bill was able to get home
again. Lee had completely changed. The tiny infant was gone and in it’s place was a curious toddler, scooting around on the
floor in pursuit of anything different.
Caroline stayed home with Lee and he wasn’t used to
strangers. When his father went to scoop
him up and hug him, Lee yowled for an hour.
It took several days before the baby would go to his father without
complaint. Adama soon won him over with
play. Lee had always been small for his
age, but he was no less rough. Even at
less then a year, he loved to tussle with his father. Deep in the back of his mind, Bill saw it as
the continuation of their private war, but it didn’t change his love for his
son.
His job kept him away from home for long months at a
time. He received regular correspondence
from his wife and he boasted of his son’s advances to everyone on board the
freighter. He watched his son grow
through his wife’s vivid description. He
didn’t make it home for Lee’s first birthday, but he sent a taped message. It was to become a tradition.
He saw Lee when he was fifteen months old and when he
returned at eighteen months, he was overjoyed to learn that Lee was going to
have a sibling. Lee was running and
talking up a storm. By this time, he had
seen his father often enough and with picture reminders; he would run to his
arms whenever welcomed. Lee laughed
easily and smiled brightly for his father.
Adama felt a peace with his son and was excited for the new baby.
Lee was two and very smart for his age. He followed his ‘papa’ everywhere. He sat on a bench and studied his father as
he worked the wood for the cradle. He
even mimicked his father’s actions.
Adama grinned the whole time.
“Wass dat papa?”
Lee finally asked.
Adama chuckled.
“It’s a crib for the new baby.”
“Momma says I gets a big boy bed
so da baby can have my baby bed.”
Adama lowered his voice as if plotting with his young
son. “This is a surprise for momma.”
“didja
make my baby bed?”
“No, I didn’t have time.
You were in too much of a hurry to get here, Little
Warrior.” He scuffled
Lee’s fine, curly hair relishing its softness on his rough, callused fingers.
Lee made a serious look but said nothing more. The next time Bill looked up, Lee had fallen
asleep with his small head on the edge of the workbench. As he always did, he rested his hand softly
on Lee’s sleeping chest. It always
thrilled him to feel the gentle rise and fall of his son’s breathing.
Zak’s birth changed things for the Adama family. Adama made sure he was there. He was the first to hold his squalling second
son. There was no fear, no deep insight,
only Zak, demanding his needs be met.
Bill had actually taken three months leave. He was there a month before and two months
after Zak’s birth and this time, he had indeed built his son a custom
crib.
Zak got his mother’s personality, whereas Lee had gotten
her looks. He was loud and
boisterous. His fat, chubby cheeks
welcomed attention from everyone. He
smiled easily and as he grew, cooed and giggled often. Lee adored his brother and helped out
whenever possible.
One day however, the two year old was feeling a bit left
out. He wandered through the house,
ignored. He found himself in his
parent’s bedroom, where Zak’s cradle was.
He ran his stubby fingers along the wood and rocked it. He could hear the adults in the outer room
laughing at something the baby had done.
Lee longed to be the baby again.
He crawled into the cradle, which stood about ½ meter off
the floor. As soon as he settled his
weight in it, he began to rock it himself.
He didn’t understand that the cracking noise he heard was a bad
thing. Before long, the cradle crashed
to the floor. Lee screamed in fear and
pain.
Bill and Caroline rushed into the room and found Lee
crying in the remains of the cradle.
“LEE! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” Adama roared.
Caroline tired to calm her husband down, but he was too
angry. He scooped up his son harshly and
delivered a firm hand to his son’s bottom.
Lee’s diaper prevented any pain.
He didn’t understand his father’s anger and instead held out the finger
that caused him pain.
Bill ignored the tiny injury. “What were you thinking?”
“Me wanna
cradle too.”
Lee’s large blue eyes swam with tears and Adama softened but not much. “Lee, you’re a Warrior now. Warriors don’t get cradles.” He wiped at the tears on Lee’s cheeks a bit roughly in his residual anger. “And they certainly don’t ever cry.”
He wondered when he’d first told his sons that a man wasn’t a man until he wore the wings of a viper pilot?
(content warning for five and six)
Zeus met with his lead henchman just outside their fake jails. The man flexed his hand. “This guy’s tougher than we figured. His old man showing any signs of cracking?”
Zeus shook his head. “None. I don’t like how long it’s taking. I’m sure they have search parties out by now. We can’t take forever. We’ll just have to step things up.”
“We can do that.” He returned to his men. Zeus took one final drag of his cigarette and tossed it on the floor. He seemed to take delight in squashing the smoking butt with his shoe. “Well now, Bill. Seems it’s time to step things up. Do you love your son or not?”
He stepped back into the room and watched Adama struggle to stretch. “Getting sore?”
Adama glared at him, flexing his hands upward to emphasize his point. “Do we really need these?” All his military training had never prepared him for this day. He seethed with anger and fought for control of his raging emotions. He’d never felt so desperate in his life and it fueled barely controllable urges. He refused to break. The small flicker of functioning reason in the back of his mind told him it wouldn’t do either of them any good.
Zeus smiled. “What? Release you? Then you might turn away from your son’s situation. We cannot have that now, can we?”
“Lords forbid it!” Adama mocked.
Zeus laughed and released Adama’s left bindings. Before releasing the right wrist, he stepped back and removed his weapon, keeping it trained on the father as he released the final bond. “There. Stretch a few minutes. I know my men are preparing a new series of interesting things for your son. No sense you being uncomfortable.”
Adama didn’t immediately move, not trusting his own muscles. He finally wriggled his hands and feet and rolled his shoulders. He started to stand slowly and suddenly sprang at Zeus. With his arm outstretched he hit Zeus’s gun arm first. A stray shot was released and crashed into the glass window separating Lee from his father. A small section crashed to the ground on the other side.
Adama’s momentum was not to be stopped and he crashed into the wiry man. They both hit the deck hard. They exchanged repeated blows and both men were heard cursing. Zeus brought a leg up between them and managed to kick Adama off of him. Adama fell backward, but not before noting that Zeus had lost the gun in the struggle. He quickly scanned the room as Zeus gasped for lost breaths. Adama spied the gun near the door and lunged for it. Adama knew he wasn’t the man the military had trained in hand to hand combat so many years ago, but his reflexes reverted to those younger days and he reached the handle of the gun a fraction of a second faster than Zeus.
He grabbed the butt and clambered to his feet. Zeus got to his feet as well. He wiped at the blood running from his mouth as he waited for Adama’s next move. “What will you do now?” He seemed to ignore the gun pointed at his chest.
“Get out of here with my son.” Adama snarled. He risked a glance over Zeus’s shoulder. Lee seemed to have responded to the shattering glass and his head was tilted slightly different. His son was still alive.
“Do you really think my men are going to let you leave?” Zeus coolly reasoned.
“What are they going to do, kill me?” Adama smiled confidently. He waved the gun a bit with bravado, as if to encourage them. He was either getting his son out of here or they would have to kill him. Either way, his son would be saved and so would the fleet.
Motion around Lee distracted Adama. The four men had surrounded his son and one pointed a gun directly at Lee’s temple. Zeus didn’t even look. He knew what was happening. “Who will fire first, Bill? My men or you?”
Adama didn’t even flinch. “I do love my son.” He changed his plan and pointed the gun at his own temple.
“Can you pull the trigger and end your own life so easily?” Zeus remained calm.
Adama stared at Lee the whole time, hoping Lee would survive to learn of this last testament of his father’s love. He pulled back the trigger and fired at his own head.
*Click*
Adama quickly applied his finger to the trigger again and again, still nothing. Zeus laughed. He laughed so hard he doubled over clutching his ribs. Adama raged. He threw the gun down and lunged at Zeus, tackling him at his middle. Adama’s arms wrapped around Zeus’s middle, locking his arms at his side. He couldn’t control his motion. Both men fell backward, Zeus hitting the glass wall first. It shattered at the impact. Glass flew everywhere and both men lay on the deck stunned.
Two strong sets of arms pulled Adama off of Zeus. Zeus didn’t immediately rise. He lay on the deck, still smiling. He turned his head, glass crunching beneath him. He called to Lee, who slowly turned to the voice summoning him.
Lee’s eyes were glazed and unfocused. Zeus knew he’d been given a drug to take the edge off the pain. They needed him cognizant, for an instant such as this. “Lee, do you know why this is happening to you?”
Lee groaned and his head shook slightly.
It was enough response for Zeus. “We need something from your father.”
Lee’s pained voice cut him off. It was quiet and quivered with effort. “I have no father.”
The comment stunned Zeus. Adama might feel his relationship with his son was fine, but obviously the son differed in opinion. “The Commander?” He dared the change, curious as to the results.
“…no give… terrorist. Kill me.” Lee had been trying to hold his head up but it sank back to the deck from his efforts.
Zeus reached out a hand and gently guided Lee’s head his father’s direction. “See your commander, here, watching you suffer.”
Lee fought to bring his sight into focus. Adama watched it happen, holding his breath. He muttered. “No, Lee. No.” He saw his son’s eyes swim with recognition.
Pain crossed Lee’s face and all knew it was not from his injuries. The realization that his father had been there all along, doing nothing to stop his suffering, cut Lee to the bone.
“Yes, Lee. You father sits there and lets you suffer. It’s his pride. He would let us slowly kill you. Just as always, he places his beloved ship above his own son.” Zeus studied Lee’s face.
Adama wanted to stop Zeus’s words, seeing the effect it had on his son. He called to Lee, pleading. “Don’t listen to him, Lee. He’s playing with your mind. Ignore him, son.” He emphasized the word ‘son’. He had no idea why Lee now denied his paternity but now was no time to find out. He knew his son had received training for circumstances like this however he couldn’t deny the look in Lee’s eyes. He believed Zeus.
Zeus laughed. “Has your father always used double talk? Do you remember his speech at the decommissioning? He spoke of creating life and then ignoring the responsibility. He created you and ignored you did he not? Will you turn on him now as he has turned his back on you?”
Lee groaned, wanting only to escape this nightmare.
Zeus touched Lee’s shoulder. “Your father betrays you now, as he has your entire life.”
“NOOO!!!” Adama shouted, losing all pretense of control.
The men pulled Adama back into his original prison. He was retied to the chair and now gagged. He breathed deeply and never took his eyes off Lee. He blinked often to keep the tears that threatened to escape at bay.
Zeus pulled himself off the deck and shook the glass from his clothes. “So, next phase gentlemen and do not spare the young Captain. His father is not quite ready to share the information we want.”
He stepped back through the broken glass, kicking a few larger shards from his path. He pulled a stool to the wall and leaned back against it as if casually watching a video.
The men grabbed Lee’s arms and tied them together behind his back. Lee moaned, unable to control his pain. He longed to fully detach his mind from his body. He wanted for the first time in his life, to die. To the extent he could, Lee prepared his body to again receive the blows he’d become familiar with. They didn’t follow, rather his wrist bindings were tied to a rope and he felt his arms being lifted behind him. His shoulders immediately felt the stress. He was pulled up and his shoulders seared with the tension of tendons ripping. He was dropped again and felt relief flood through him.
It didn’t last long, again and again his arms were raised, each time he was taken higher and for a longer time. His head spun with agony. The pride that had thus far silenced him was gone. He cried out in pain, no gag to muffle his misery.
Lee’s cries fell on Adama’s ears like daggers. He couldn’t look any longer. There was no need. Lee’s screams told the full story.
** ~ **
Lieutenant Kara “Starbuck” Thrace finished her overnight patrol bored and stiff. She’d gone straight to her rack. She woke that afternoon, still bored. The only thing keeping her sane was the thrill of beating the frak out of Lee Adama. She’d been goading him for weeks now. He’d finally consented to a boxing match, if for no other reason then to get Kara off his back. She didn’t care why he’d done it. She was looking forward to the challenge. There weren’t many people she felt threatened by on Galactica, but Lee Adama was one. She’d been top dog on Galactica until he came along. She’d never admit it, but he could match her in flight and he excelled in execution. She wanted to challenge him physically.
He promised to meet her in the gym. She’d been stunned when he finally conceded. He seemed so lost lately. She almost wondered if he needed to defeat her. If he sank low enough, would he finally break? She knew it was harsh, but she’d learned long ago that only in the worst lights, did you finally know what the light meant to you.
She pounded the heavy bag a few more times before storming
to the phone against the far wall.
Kara’s hand stopped. “What do you mean you don’t know? He’s late for our match.”
Concern for the men she considered her only true family flashed across her face and then was replaced by the stern countenance of a trained warrior. “What do you mean, missing?”
“Have flights been stopped?”
“Yes, and the marines are searching
the ship top to bottom.”
“Thanks,
** ~ **
Lee had long ago felt the bones in his shoulders snap. He distracted his mind by visualizing the tendons ripping and shredding as well. His throat was dry and tasted coppery from blood. He’d bitten the insides of his mouth in a pathetic attempt to stop his own screams.
They paused again. Lee was left to ‘rest’. Adama’s hands quivered with unspent rage. If he closed his eyes all he heard was Lee’s agonizing screams. If he opened them, he saw his beaten son. He knew he’d hear the screams and see that sight the rest of his life. Zeus approached and removed Adama’s gag. Adama sputtered, but said nothing. In short order a glass was lifted to his lips. He refused to drink. Though raspy, he managed a voice. “Give it to Lee.”
Zeus didn’t leave. “You are not going to break are you? Your heart is dead to your son.”
Adama didn’t take his eyes off Lee, writhing on the floor. “I’m going to kill you. You know that, right?”
Zeus nodded. “One of us will die today. Does it have to be Lee?”
“Lee will not die today.”
“And just how do you intend to guarantee that, Bill?” Zeus moved close and leaned in to hear the reply.
Bill sucked in a breath. “98 547 12Alpha…”
Lee grasped onto the smallest bit of reason. He knew whatever the drug they had given him was designed to keep him conscious. Despite his best attempts to succumb to darkness, he failed. The Commander, no his father was here. His father sat nearby and watched his son suffer. It was true then, he had no father. Was this his father’s revenge? Any bit of hope he might have had was truly gone. “No…” He moaned.
Adama was about to deliver the last sequence of the code when he heard Lee call out ‘no’. He stopped. Had his son heard and understood? Pride swelled within him. His son understood and knew the sacrifice that had to be made. Lee knew this was about more then just them. It was about the entire human race. Adama felt his resolve grow. He finished with several gibberish words.
Zeus, thinking he had finally broken the man, cursed and lashed out at Adama. He struck him hard across the face. “DAMN YOU! TELL ME! DO NOT KILL YOUR SON!”
Adama calmly glared at Zeus. Adama was back in control. “My son won’t die by my hand.”
Zeus regained his composure and stepped back. “You do not think so? Can you imagine any situation where you would spare your son?” He smiled. “I can.” He stepped through the glass and nodded to the men waiting there and returned to Adama’s side. “Before this day is through, Bill. I promise you, you will use your own hand to kill your son.”
“Never!”
Zeus shook his head. “Never say never, Bill. Just remember, I warned you.” He pointed back toward Lee. One of the men was fondling Lee.
Adama felt the meager contents of his stomach rise up.
It wasn’t long before Kara had taken command of a band of six marines. They moved quickly to the various landing bays. They’d searched for nearly an hour and found nothing, not one sign.
“Let’s hit the cargo bays.” She marched quickly through the corridors and the six men struggled to keep up. As she rounded a corner, she crashed into Colonel Tigh.
“Lieutenant
“Looking for our lost Commander and Captain, Sir.” She added a mock salute to let the colonel know just how she was feeling.
“You have more important things to be doing. Since our CAG is missing, you’re lead pilot.” Tigh loathed putting Kara Thrace in places of command.
“Frak that! Helo can be in charge. I’m going to find them!” She pushed past him and he followed her.
** ~ **
Lee was again injected with something. It did nothing to alleviate his pain. It was a hallucinogen. Almost immediately the world began to swim. Voices that had once been clear now screeched or garbled. Faces that had stood plainly before him now swam, blurred and rearranged themselves into hideous monsters. Lee cringed and tried slink away from the horrors. His body trapped him. His leg was incapable of motion without rocking him with agony and his shoulders had long ago lost the ability to assist him. At least the hands had stopped their unwanted advances. He thought. Maybe he just didn’t feel them? His humiliation was temporarily at ease.
Between the swirling images in his mind, one thing stayed sharply focused. It was thin and shiny. Lee couldn’t place it, but instinctively knew it would cause him harm. He cowered from it. Although he once thought of surviving this ordeal, he now fervently prayed for death.
Adama watched defeated as the men moved closer to Lee. Lee’s lead aggressor brandished a thin silver instrument. It appeared to Adama to be a blade of some sort. He had absolutely no idea what more they could possibly do to his son. He was beyond anger.
Zeus looked truly disappointed. “I did not want it to come to this. You have left us no choice. He will die…” He paused a moment. “He will beg for it and if nothing else gets through that leaden heart of yours, his own pleas will.”
Without warning, the man plunged the knife into Lee’s leg and dragged it low. Blood spurted out and Lee screamed. Adama gulped. No time for relief or preparation and the knife was again plunged into Lee, this time in his thigh. Blood now flowed unfettered from two deep, long wounds and collected on the deck below Lee.
“Is this how you would see your son die, Bill? Being cut until his blood has stained the deck of your precious ship? Will you stop this for him?”
Adama looked away. Again, he had no need of eyes. Lee’s screams revealed every perforation of his flesh. Nothing else existed in the universe but those shrieks. He hardly noticed when Zeus released his bonds. “Go to your son, Bill. Bring him what comfort you can in his final moments.”
Adama looked at his son. Zeus was pushing his shoulders off the chair. Once up, he was pulled forward. As they neared the pains of broken glass, Adama stared as the man plunged the dagger into the left side of Lee’s chest. Despite its broken state, Lee’s body shot momentarily upright and then collapsed. Tears fell from Lee’s eyes and he gasped and sputtered.
Zeus pushed Adama forward and he stumbled to his son’s side. The other men backed away. Adama merely gaped. He wanted to put his hands on his son’s bleeding wounds but had no idea where to start. He reached out and placed a tentative hand on the most recent wound. Lee cried out as if Adama’s hands had caused the damage. His hand quickly withdrew.
Zeus knelt beside Lee on the other side. “Captain. He is here, the man who can ease your pain. Ask him and he will do it. He will ease your pain.”
Adama glared at Zeus who merely smiled. “When we return,” He pointed to the man who had earlier groped his son. “He will finish Lee off. He enjoys Necrophilia, but he will have him alive as well. He enjoys feeling them die literally around him. It makes me ill. It will be your son’s final feeling unless you take action yourself.” They all left the Adamas alone with that hideous thought.
Adama knew he was alone. Lee mumbled unrecognizably in addition to his moans. His body shook with pain and shock. Finally words coalesced. “Help me.” It was a desperate plea from a dying man. Adama reached two fingers down to test his son’s pulse. Despite his wounds, it beat fast and strong. Lee was dying, but not quickly. He slid his arm under Lee’s shoulders and tried to heft Lee into his arms.
Lee screamed in pain. “End it… please… Don’t let him…”
** ~ **
Zeus and the men stood outside the door, listening to Lee Adama scream and moan.
“Boss, how is this gonna work?”
Zeus lit a cigarette. “It will not. Lee Adama is going to die and if the Commander does not take his own life shortly thereafter, we will kill him.”
“So we did all this for nothing?”
“No. Tigh will be in charge. He will not be nearly as hard to overthrow. Look at his history. He is incompetent. No matter what happened here today, the Adamas had to die.”
“Shame. They’re tough.”
“Yeah.”
** ~ **
Kara ignored Tigh’s complaints and thundered through the halls. “We’re starting in the rear and checking every inch of this ship.”
** ~ **
A small alarm sounded on Zeus’s belt. “Someone is coming. Get in and silence them!” He dropped his cigarette and stubbed it out. The men re-entered and stared at the sight before them.
Adama held his son in his arms, his head bent low near his son’s. He whispered to his son, who heard nothing. Captain Adama merely mumbled over and over with the precious breath he was able to muster. “No more.”
The men gaped as Adama pulled the blade into his hand and slowly moved it over his son’s chest. His hand shook. He wouldn’t allow his son to die in the manner planned.
Zeus stepped in and growled. “Stop him. If he does it now, they will hear!” The men remained frozen until Zeus shoved one forward. They surrounded the Adamas and restricted them.
Adama realized someone must be near. He shouted out but a hand quickly covered his mouth. Another hand covered Lee’s and Adama’s arms were also held in place. All waited in silence.
** ~ **
Kara entered the bay first and scanned the room. She strode across the room to the far wall. Tigh followed her. “This is wrong and you know it. We are both needed elsewhere.”
Kara stopped and whirled on him. “Listen, as much as I hate to admit it. You ARE needed elsewhere. I however, am searching.”
Tigh howled in frustration. “Damn it…” He was about to go on, but stopped. He pointed down to the smoldering butt. Holding a finger to his lips, he scanned the room.
Kara nodded and continued talking. “It drives you nuts doesn’t it? That I might find them when you can’t?”
Tigh stopped in front of the fake wall, realizing it was wrong. He motioned to the marines. “There’s nothing here. Let’s go.”
Several of the marines moved to the door, making as much noise as possible. The others silently placed themselves in strategic locations. Tigh and Starbuck exchanged knowing glances, each running their hands softly along the wall.
** ~ **
After several minutes of silence, the men in the fake room began to stir. Zeus waved them back. He hissed silently and pointed to his belt. He mouthed. “They have not left yet.”
Adama understood the situation. His mouth was held firmly by one hand and another set of strong arms were wrapped around his chest, holding his arms to his sides. The blade however, was still in his hand. He tested his wrist movement and grinned under the hand. He figured he had just enough. He flicked his wrist and stabbed the knife into his captor’s leg.
The surprised man cried out from the attack. Chaos immediately ensued. Men swarmed everywhere. Adama was released. He looked down briefly at his son but then turned to Zeus who was attempting to flee. Zeus’s men fought hard to protect him.
Adama, however, was a father obsessed. He tore through the men. “ZEUS!”
The man paled and turned to face his foe. “Bill?” He laughed. “Do you really plan to simply kill me, standing here?” He slowly moved his hands into the air. “I surrender.”
Adama stepped forward and held the blade at Zeus’s neck. “You’re a coward.”
A marine stepped behind Zeus and pulled his arms into the cuffs before Adama could act. “I have him Commander.”
Adama growled with frustration.
“Who is the coward here, Bill? You have had all day to finally prove to your son you love him and you failed. I hope that comforts you in your old age.”
Zeus was pulled backward out of the room. Adama dropped the blade and returned to Lee, who was already being tended, inadequately, by Kara. Adama shouted into the air. “GET A MEDIC NOW!”
Ignoring the pain he caused Lee, enjoying the sound of it as knowledge of the life still within him, he pulled Lee again into his arms and cradled him. Over and over he whispered. “Hold on, Son. Hold on. It’s over. You’re safe.”
Kara struggled to keep some semblance of strength. “What did they do to him?”
Adama roared. “What does it look like?”
Kara shook her head, clutching Lee’s hand. “But what did they possibly want from him.”
Adama didn’t mean to reply out loud. “Not him. They wanted… my soul.”
Lee’s body began to shake violently. He coughed and sputtered blood from his mouth. As violent convulsions racked his body, Adama wished he knew what to pray for. Inside he cringed. He knew it would be easier if the lords called Lee home and yet he knew he would never survive if they did.
Adama had barely left Lee’s side for those first six days, his hand often resting softly on Lee’s chest as he had when he was a baby. No pressure or coercion would bring him away. When he absolutely couldn’t ignore nature any longer, he saw to his needs as quickly as possible. He hadn’t showered, shaved or even brushed his teeth in some time. Lee’s condition was too dire. Adama had convinced himself that Lee remained alive only through his presence. He couldn’t remember how often Lee had been in surgery so far. It wasn’t worth tracking as there were more to come if Lee survived. He cursed himself for his doubt. Lee was going to survive. They were going to get through this.
Adama had always admired his chief medical officer, Major Cottle. The doctor was typically filled with doom, gloom and sarcasm. In Lee’s case, he was outwardly filled with doom and gloom, yet was still proceeding as if Lee would live and fly again. He carefully stitched the knife wounds using the tiniest of sutures. There would be scars, but far softer than one might expect. He‘d been consulting books and the few colleagues he had in the fleet for his next task, repairing Lee’s shoulders. Adama wondered who was battling more, Lee or Cottle. The doubt crept in again. Was Lee fighting or were simple mechanics keeping him alive?
It seemed Cottle had finally managed to stop the internal bleeding. Between the wounds and beatings, it seemed like some new failure occurred in Lee every few hours in the first days. He was still deathly pale and needed machines to provide or encourage most of his bodily functions. The only relief for those worrying over him was that Lee had remained relatively stable the past 24-hours.
Others tried to support Lee and the Commander. Tigh came to him several times a day with reports and questions. Adama answered as minimally as possible. He barely spoke to anyone. His report of the entire incident had been less then a page when typed. President Roslin also did her best to attend to the needs of the Adama men but she too succumbed to the overwhelming sense of isolationism that permeated the ward. One might enter the room hopeful and optimistic but soon all felt a clear message of ‘go away, you’re not wanted here’. Kara was present as often as possible, but had somehow sensed that both Adamas needed her to do her job right now. Adama had silenced her fast enough.
“There’s nothing you can do here. Get out!” Adama’s voice was harsh and angry.
As much as she longed to be with Lee, she knew what she had to do. If she was honest with herself, she couldn’t bring herself to watch the pathetic scene either. Kara had gone on patrol that day feeling for the first time in her career on Galactica that her cherished Commander truly did not care about anything. Fear like she had never known before clutched at her heart and for once, she couldn’t ignore it.
“I think I’ll go in on the left shoulder in the morning provided he remains stable.” Cottle was just finishing his latest examination. Every injury had been handled methodically. It was all he could do. Physically, the doctor still questioned the Captain’s ability to survive. There were still so many risks. He wasn’t even sure the battles were worth it. The emotional shell that was sure to remain after this experience wouldn’t be much of a life. Yet, having looked into the eyes of the pained father, Cottle knew if he didn’t do everything in his power to save the son, the Commander would die as well. He hoped the knowledge that they had done all that they could would bring Adama some comfort.
“When will he wake up?” Adama’s voice was scratchy from idleness.
Cottle rubbed absentmindedly at his own chin. The mere sight of his Commander’s state was distressing. “Couple weeks.”
Adama looked at him with alarm. “WHAT?”
Cottle folded the chart cover back into place. “He’s been through indescribable things. To ease his pain would require such high levels of medication that it makes more sense to leave him in a drug induced coma until some of the injuries have had a chance to heal.”
“You can’t just keep him drugged like that.” The anguished father argued more for himself than his son. He needed Lee to wake up and tell him he understood, that he forgave his father for his part in what had happened.
Cottle moved closer. “Sure, the physical pain might take his mind off the emotional trauma, but that’s not gonna help him. He’ll need every ounce of strength to get over this. I’ve consulted with a few therapists in the fleet and they agree.”
“I can’t…” Adama quickly stopped his confession.
“No, you can’t stay here for all that time. You need to get out of here as it is and get some good hot food, sleep and most importantly, a shower. You know you don’t just smell badly right? You reek! You’re disgusting.”
Adama ignored the doctor. He stared at his son’s lifeless body. How was he supposed to keep doing this for weeks? He felt a nudge at his shoulder. “What?”
“I said. Get out of here. I don’t want to see you in this room for at least 24 hours.”
“That’s ridiculous. I’m not staying away from my son that long.” I’m not failing him again.
“It’s an order.” The major hated pulling medical rank, but this was warranted.
“You can’t order me to stay away from my son.” Adama growled, showing just a hint of his typical fire.
“I can and I will.” Cottle dropped to his knee next to the Commander, uncharacteristically serious. “Lee will need you when he wakes up. He’ll need everything you can give him. Right now, it sure doesn’t look like you have much to offer your son. You’ll scare him. Don’t make me order you to leave, sir.”
Adama shook his head. You can’t order me to leave if I’m no longer in the military. Did the doctor know how close to the truth his words were? Did he realize that William Adama had nothing to offer his son, never had? He knew he needed time alone. His mind argued that the only way he could help Lee was to have healed his own inner demons first. He certainly couldn’t do that staring at Lee’s condition. “You’ll call me if anything changes?”
“Myself.”
Adama stood slowly and watched his son for a few more minutes before leaving for his quarters. He passed the next days in a silent blur, keeping to himself and doing only what was absolutely necessary to his job. He shivered at the effort it took him to care about the day-to-day operations of his once beloved ship. He ran his hand along the cold wall and thought of his son’s warm chest. How had I put this ship ahead of my sons?
** ~ **
When Lee was finally taken off the drugs that kept him in the coma, everyone waited for him to drag open his eyes. Cottle didn’t expect it to be long, so Adama had returned to round the clock scrutiny.
Lee’s arm twitched. His head shook slightly. Small moans and coarse cries spilled from his lips. He was having another nightmare. Adama heard only one comprehensible word escape his lips. “No”
Adama’s hand tightened on Lee’s limp one. “It’s over, son. You’re safe. I swear no one will ever hurt you again.”
It was an impossible promise for any parent to make, much less keep. Listening to his tone though, anyone would have known that this father meant every word of it. Bill Adama would never be the same man again.
An hour later, Adama looked at the various monitors that still guarded his son, as he often did. He’d begun to mark his son’s life by the various blips and beeps. As he left the screens and moved his eyes down over his son’s still form, he was startled to meet Lee’s open eyes. He smiled, thrilled to see his son aware. “Lee? Welcome back, son.” He squeezed Lee’s hand.
There was no response. Lee’s expression didn’t change. Adama grew concerned that something wasn’t right. Lee hadn’t received any head injuries, but perhaps the drugs had been more harmful than originally thought. “Lee? Can you hear me?”
Adama’s smile faded to a frown of concern and he repeated his question. He studied Lee’s face for a response or indication of distress, but there was nothing. Lee’s once vivid, life-filled eyes were now dull and for lack of a better word, dead.
“Lee, I know this is a lot to handle. I know you’re hurting, but please… give me a sign that you understand me.” Adama grew more anxious with each passing minute.
Lee’s sign didn’t help at all. Lee’s eyes slid shut and with what strength he could rally, he pulled his hand from his father’s grasp. It had been no easy task. He had no motion in his shoulders. He had been determined.
Adama’s sign offered him no comfort.
** ~ **
Days passed and no one received more response than Adama did. Lee had been moved into a small, semi-private room. There was an entry area, sectioned off by a curtain. Cottle had been forced to pull Kara from Lee’s bed where she had climbed on to slug him into a response.
“FRAK YOU LEE! We’re trying to help you, you selfish bastard. You can’t shut us out! We can HELP!”
When Cottle had removed
her from the room, Lee’s heart seized up.
How would anyone help him? How
would anyone else ever understand? How
could he ever face them? Who could he
ever trust again? Captain Lee Adama
might just have well as died, for only a shell remained.
A psychologist from within the fleet arrived on the fourth day and sat for a
session with the young, battered Captain.
He emerged from behind the curtain to meet the anxious faces of
Commander Adama, President Roslin and Kara Thrace. “He says he just wants to be left alone.”
“Frak that!” Kara shouted, looking past the newcomer. “He doesn’t get that privilege when there are people who have been worried sick about him!” She shouted loud enough to ensure Lee heard her.
Doctor Leon Wassertin hadn’t had to deal with anything like this in his career. He’d had a small but lucrative practice near Picon before the attack. His specialty was unhappy housewives. Since having been contacted by Major Cottle he’d been reading all he could about these circumstances, but he didn’t feel any more qualified to help. The faces staring at him were powerful ones in the fleet and he was aware of the Captain’s importance as well. His task was as daunting as the faces before him.
He shook his head and drew in a long breath. “Lieutenant
The Commander scowled. “What you meant to say was with his own father as the cause.”
President Roslin cut the doctor off. “This is not your fault, Commander. The men to blame are in your brig, awaiting punishment.”
The Commander really hadn’t given much thought to Zeus and his men since the rescue. His concern had been his son. “Punishment? Don’t you mean trial?”
Roslin stuttered. “We all know they’re guilty.”
Adama ignored her statement and returned his gaze to the doctor. “So, what you’re saying is, Lee gets to call the shots right now? Whatever he wants, he gets?” Adama wasn’t going to argue. He wanted it made clear for the others.
Wassertin nodded. “Forcing him right now would not achieve any of the goals.”
Kara was intrigued by his use of the word ‘goals.’ “What would those goals be?”
“I agree with Major Cottle, first and foremost his physical health. They’ll be starting physical therapy on his shoulders and leg as soon as possible. He’s normally an active man. We need to return that piece of control over his life as soon as possible.”
“And then?” It was Adama who asked.
“And then we continue to find ways for him to regain control of his life.”
“I don’t understand. He was kidnapped and tortured. How does this plan help?” Roslin mused quietly.
The doctor provided a textbook answer. “He’s a warrior. He was defeated in the most humiliating ways imaginable. He couldn’t do anything to save himself and he’s probably experiencing the greatest sense of fear in his life.”
“But you said he tried to escape. He has to know he did all he could?” Roslin argued, looking at the Commander.
Adama wasn’t satisfied with the doctor’s take on the situation. “That’s not it.” He paused and then continued. “Lee learned that everyone else in the universe now comes before him. His own father watched him suffer and did nothing to stop it.”
Kara was terrified at the expression on the Commander’s face. “No. He knows you couldn’t give them the code. He knows that!” She continued her argument. She refused to believe that Lee would make this situation about his relationship with his father. The doctor was right. Lee was a warrior. He knew the situation. If it were reversed, he’d have done the same thing. Kara knew it.
Major Cottle interrupted the conversation. “Madame President, there’s a call for you.” The President left and the major turned to Wassertin. “Let’s get this plan set up so my staff knows what to expect.” The two men walked off, leaving Adama and Kara.
Kara looked at him and dared to grab his arm. “You can’t blame yourself for this. It isn’t your fault.”
Adama flashed with anger. “THE HELL IT ISN’T! He’s my son! The only reason he’s in this bed is that I helped create him. They spilled his blood because he shares mine!”
Kara wasn’t about to let him do this to himself. She knew it wasn’t going to do anyone any good. She rose up to meet his anger. “This attitude of yours isn’t going to help him!” She demanded, getting right into her superior officer’s face.
“I’ve never been able to help him.” Adama said quietly.
Kara shook her head, scowling. “He wouldn’t let you, ever!”
“He denied me.” Adama sounded more defeated than ever.
“What?” She asked, not sure if she heard him correctly.
“On the deck… He said he didn’t have a father. He said I wasn’t his father.”
Kara was stunned. Why would Lee do that? “He was probably just trying to throw them off. It was a tactic. It didn’t mean anything.”
Adama looked at her for the first time, really looked at her. She saw a tired, old man instead of the robust, tough-as-nails commander she loved.
“Don’t you see? How quiet he’s been lately? He’s given up on me. I failed him once too often. He doesn’t want to be my son anymore.” He added. “Not that he ever wanted to be my son.”
Kara had no idea what to say. “No. You’re tired. He’s tired. This will all work out. You misunderstood him, that’s all. You two always misunderstand each other.” She tried to make a joke. It was lost on him.
A page broke the tense moment. “Pass the word for Lieutenant
She muttered. “
Adama stepped back behind the curtain. He looked down at his sleeping son. “I swear Lee. Give me a chance to make this right. Give me a chance to prove to you that I... I’ll never put anything else before you again. I promise.”
A few weeks passed. Lee’s body slowly mended. He silently fought his way through several sessions of physical therapy every day. Each day Doctor Wassertin visited him as well, but Lee said very little. As a matter of fact if he had been quiet before, he was downright mute now. He didn’t always ignore everyone but he didn’t engage anyone either. When asked a question, he would respond as succinctly as possible and then roll away.
A determined few continued to visit him daily. If they snuck up on him, they could catch him before he feigned sleep. If he so much as heard anyone in Life Station greet Starbuck or the President, he would close his eyes and roll onto his side. He’d become a master at ignoring all Kara threw at him. Each day she arrived with another way of trying to reach him. Each day it failed but she always walked away feeling victorious. She knew he was working hard to “win” and if that was the case, there was still a spark within him. As long as that spark was there, he would return to them. She knew that.
She dropped the papers on his bed. “There.
Help out. If you’re going to sit
around and mope, feeling sorry for yourself, at least do some work to help us out.”
Lee had glared at her. He moved his hands slightly. “How am I supposed to hold them?” He had limited mobility with his arms.
Kara was optimistic for Lee, but the Commander still vexed her greatly. He’d closed into himself. He behaved like a robot. He gave a few orders, got them through a few Cylon skirmishes and went about his job, but there was no fire, no passion. The crew had noticed it and Tigh had even attempted to talk to Adama, but to no avail. The man who had once inspired them to go on despite the horrific Cylon attacks was gone.
** ~ **
Lee feigned sleep a lot. Although his body was weak and still healing his dreams tormented him, preventing him from achieving real rest. He’d lost count of the times he’d woken in a complete panic. It was in these darkest hours that he began to formulate his plan. He knew he’d never return to the life he once knew but they would all insist on it. Fear of the future and all the possible miseries shrouded his every waking thought. He shuddered under his covers just thinking about climbing into the cockpit of a viper and facing down a Cylon.
“Can I get you another blanket, Captain?”
Lee was startled from his dark thoughts. “What?”
The young woman had been Lee’s night nurse since he woke. “You were shivering. Are you cold?”
He nodded. He was cold, but no amount of blankets would warm him. She left and quickly returned with an additional layer of warmth. “This should help.” She tucked it around him and continued chatting. “We need to get more food into you. You’ve lost weight and that’s probably why you’re cold.”
Lee mumbled a quiet thanks and pulled the new blanket up under his chin. She continued. “You’ve hardly eaten enough to keep a bird going.” She stepped back. “I bet if you eat yourself a hearty meal tomorrow, you’ll be a step closer to getting out of here.” She quickly added, smiling. “It’s nice that you’re able to feed yourself now. I bet you like using your arms again.”
Lee ignored her last comments and willed her to leave. She seemed to read his silence and departed, pulling the drape closed behind her. He was left to his own mind now and it again swirled with thoughts and images that kept him down. He winced at the memory of the lead pipe striking his leg repeatedly. Interspersed in the images were his father’s words. No, but he should probably be locked up on the Astral Queen for as long as humanity continues to survive.
He knew he was the subject of many whispered conversations in life station. He heard the shushing from the nurses as they passed him. Two days ago when he’d been forced to sit in the chair for his required few hours, he even overheard his own pilots talking about him. He hadn’t allowed his mind to worry about who it had even been. He dwelt only on their words.
“You think we could see the Captain while we’re here?”
“No way. I heard he’s out. There’s no way he’ll get back from this. They didn’t just frak up his body. His mind’s fraked up too. At least the old man wasn’t as fraked up. He’s at least doing his job.”
“No way!” The pilot paused, obviously thinking. “So he’s not coming back? The old man did.”
“Who the hell would want to follow him into combat? We’d never know when some flashback was going
to frak him up again?
I ain’t takin’ the
risk.”
A soft chuckle followed.
“They’ll find some comfortable desk job for him?”
“Yeah. If it turns out he has any kind of mind
left.”
It certainly hadn’t helped any that shortly thereafter; President Roslin had offered him a position on her staff. It seemed even she didn’t think he could ever return to his former job. Maybe it was the fates? He’d finally begun to see his purpose in the military after all these years. He’d made peace with it and now, it was to be ripped away from him, not his father though. No, Commander Adama had resumed his post. There were no worries there. Of course his father would. His father could do anything. He wouldn’t be scarred by the incident. It was only his son who proved yet again, what a failure he was. Maybe he ought to send Zeus a thank you card. He finally set the record straight for the world. Lee Adama was never meant to be in the military and he would never meet his father’s expectations.
Lee Adama felt lost and scared and he had no one to turn to for help. He laughed at the thought of Wassertin. The man was trying, that much was true. He prodded Lee day after day to open up and share the experience. Lee couldn’t. He wasn’t about to talk about the thoughts, images and memories that went through his mind. He wasn’t sure anymore what was real and what was a product of his drugged mind. Recently, he dwelt on the one particular memory. He lay in agony, begging for relief. A man stood above him and held a knife. Lee begged the man to help end his suffering, but he wouldn’t. Only last night had the face come into focus. It had been his father. His father had been unwilling to do what was necessary to save his son and set him free. It seemed to Lee that he was destined to fulfill his father’s wishes. He would be locked up, no matter what. Since it hadn’t been the Astral Queen, it would be a jail constructed of his mind and fears.
** ~ **
Adama had given up. Commanding the Galactica held no passion for him. He sat locked away in his office for long stretches, reading and rereading the letters from Caroline. He memorized every detail of his son’s life. Caroline had always encouraged him to find balance. When they finally divorced she said it had nothing to do with his long absences, lack of love or his career in general. She said she filed for the divorce because when he did come home, he couldn’t set his job aside. She pushed him to concentrate on family but he couldn’t seem to do it without barking commands and expecting the family to jump at them as a junior lieutenant would.
“They’re not little warriors, Bill. They’re CHILDREN. They’re your SONS. They don’t want commands. They want to play ball. I don’t care if their closets aren’t
perfectly aligned. The clothes are for
wearing, not hanging in perfect alignment.
What if they don’t want a life in the military? Bill, if you do nothing else, tell them you
love them.”
“Are you accusing me of not loving MY SONS?” Adama had roared.
She was calm, too calm.
“No. I know you love them, but
they don’t.”
“What?” Adama was
stunned. “Why on Caprica
would you say something like that?”
“When was the last time you told them you loved
them?” She demanded, confident of her
position.
“They know I love them. I show them all the time!” He retorted.
Caroline shook her head.
“How?”
“What? Don’t I
spend time with them when I’m home?
Don’t I send them letters? Don’t
I put a roof over their head?” He didn’t
understand why this didn’t seem to be enough.
“Why can’t you just tell them?”
“What more do you want from me? I don’t tell you every second? You know I love you, so do they.”
“This isn’t about me.
I’m not a child. I knew what I
was getting when I entered this marriage.”
“Then why do you demand more?”
Why couldn’t he tell his son he loved him? Is that all his son had truly ever needed of him, to hear the words? He’d spent a lot of time considering his own childhood lately as well. True, his parents had also divorced. Dad was caught up in the passion and fire of his legal career, but young Bill had never felt like his father was absent. Hadn’t he simply set the same example for his own sons? Wasn’t he showing them how important it was to find a career you loved and did well? He tried to remember his father telling him he loved him. He couldn’t but he had always known and felt it. Why were the words so damn important? He was a man of action. What had his father done that he missed?
Kara had confronted him earlier in the day as well. She’d pointed out that Lee needed him and asked repeatedly why he seemed to be avoiding him. “If you ever wanted to prove to him that you care, it’s now. Go to him!”
Her words had stung. Did Kara Thrace know him so well? He wanted to go to his son. He had never wanted to leave him. He’d given up though. The guilt consumed him no matter what he did. He’d attempted to talk to Lee many times. Lee continually ignored him. He’d tried to help Lee during physical therapy sessions. The pain in Lee’s face as his body was manipulated was overwhelming. It was too close to the original pain and it tore through Adama’s heart. In the beginning it fueled him, but Lee had finally looked at him and pointedly asked if he had come to enjoy watching Lee’s pain.
“Don’t be ridiculous!”
Adama had argued. “I just want to
help.”
It had been a rare moment of fire for Lee. “How are you helping?”
Lee had given up trying that day and Adama hadn’t been back since. He didn’t want to agitate his son further. He convinced himself that time would present the right moment to talk to his son. Until then, he stole moments at his son’s side late in the night. His son’s disturbed sleep didn’t go unnoticed. He was all too familiar with it himself. He had a lot of military knowledge and he knew lots of strategic maneuvers, but William Adama had no idea how to help his son now and it was all he wanted in the world.
** ~ **
It had been over eight weeks since the day of the brutal attack. Lee was physically still weak, but not in need of further Life Station care. He had a tight schedule of rest and continued work with the therapists to occupy his time and he would be moved into private quarters. Cottle had been sure to note that although he would indeed fly again, it would still be some time yet.
“Is there anything else you need tonight, sir?” The nurse asked.
Lee thought for a moment and nodded. “Could you bring me some paper and a pen, please?”
She smiled. “Sure. Be right back!”
She returned and closed Lee’s curtain for the night. They never closed his door. Lee drew in several deep breaths and held the pen in his trembling hand. He wasn’t sure where to begin, but in his heart, he knew it was the right step.
** ~ **
“Zeus” sat in his cell. Despite their best efforts to identify him, he remained anonymous. He claimed only to be Zeus, nothing more. His men had already been tried and sentenced to the Astral Queen. President Roslin was personally overseeing Zeus’s trial.
“You’ve been found guilty of many charges. Are you sure you have nothing to say on your own behalf?” The judge asked him for the second time.
Zeus simply stood calmly, awaiting his fate.
“I have no choice then but to sentence you to life imprisonment to be served until further notice on the Astral Queen.” He nodded to the clerk, indicating his ruling was final and two guards swept in to remove the prisoner.
Adama stood and watched his marines escort his enemy to prison. Zeus stopped in front of Adama. President Roslin stood nearby. “So, it seems I still live. Were not you going to kill me Adama? How is my son? Pity I do not see him here.”
Adama lurched forward and in an instant his hands wove around Zeus’s neck. More guards flooded over and pulled the Commander off the prisoner. Roslin was at his side again and grabbed his arm. “Please, Commander. It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it.”
Adama growled. “My son’s worth it.”
Zeus, doubled over to regain his breath, heard Adama’s words and righted himself. He stared at Adama and laughed. “Sure, you really would do anything for your son, would you not? You proved that. Tell me again, how did you save him?”
Adama again wanted to spring, but a calming arm from Laura Roslin and a nervous look from three different marines stayed him. Adama looked away. Roslin waved the marines off.
“Don’t let him do this to you, Commander.” Roslin spoke softly.
“He already did it.” Adama stormed off.
** ~ **
Cottle hoped Lee Adama would be at least excited to have his
release papers. He arrived early that
morning and signed the last discharge sheet.
It wasn’t as if the Captain was going far and Lieutenant
He glanced over his shoulder and called to the nurse there. “Is Captain Adama in the showers?”
“No, Sir. He hasn’t wakened yet.”
Cottle looked back to the empty bed, filling with dread. The letter, addressed to the Commander, lay on the bedside. He walked to the phone and picked it up. “Get me the Commander, now!”
** ~ **
“Then search the whole damn fleet. DAMN IT! I WANT HIM FOUND!” Adama replaced the phone, but not gently. It bounced back off its receiver and he smashed it back into place. “Damn it, Lee! WHY?”
He sank into his chair and rubbed his temples. Why hadn’t he seen this coming? Lee always kept his pain to himself. Caroline had always known how to draw him
out, why hadn’t he learned? It was
another check in his father failure column.
He picked up the letter again and reread Lee’s words. They burned his eyes.
CommanderAdama,
I’ll come directly to the point. I’m sparing you further burden and leaving
Galactica.
I know now I’m not the son you wanted. We’ve always had our share of
difficulties. Neither of us is
innocent. I realize now that I have let
you down once too often though. Maybe if
I had been a different son, none of this would have happened.
I overheard you and Colonel Tigh talking the day of the
incident…
Adama groaned at Lee’s choice of words. He’d been beaten and tortured and he referred to it as an incident. Adama struggled to recall the conversation with Tigh. It made no sense to him. It seemed so long ago. If Lee had overheard them, surely he knew he was wrong.
I know that you struggle with letting me off the hook for
my mutiny. You couldn’t sentence your
son to life in prison and it nagged at you.
You kept me out of jail only because it was what you had to do. Twice I have been taken hostage and they used
me each time to try and gain from you. I
keep you from doing your job.
You have far too many important concerns with the
responsibility of the entire fleet to continue to be disappointed in me. I hereby resign my commission and relieve you
of your duty as my father. You once
looked at me, shocked that I would doubt your love for me. You said you’d never leave. The truth is, you
were never there.
I intend to disappear into the fleet and try and begin
life anew. There is no need for you to
search for me. I don’t expect you
will. We can end this and both move on
free of a fake obligation to honor nothing more than a shared bloodline.
Lee Adama
Adama’s head sank to the desk. “No, Lee. No. You’re so wrong.”
** ~ **
Lee pulled himself further into the corner of the crowded ship. He’d lost track of what number shuttle it was. He’d been bouncing from ship to ship for nearly two weeks now. He’d barely avoided the marine contingent on the last flight. His father must consider him AWOL. He would indeed have him thrown in prison. Lee wondered if it would have been an easier route than this cat and mouse game. He was tired, so very tired. There wasn’t a part on his body that didn’t ache. He tried not to consider that this had been a stupid decision, if only physically. He could have rested longer on Galactica. Nothing would have changed. He rubbed absentmindedly at his leg. It throbbed constantly. Deep down he knew he would always have this reminder. His nightmare would never end.
His escape from Galactica had been uneventful. No one expected to see him out and about, so they ignored him. He scratched at his face, which was distorted by the unruly augmentation of fine, dark hair. The beard, combined with his growth of hair, blurred his once distinguishable face. The fact that his body was grossly out of shape and undernourished allowed the stolen civilian clothes to hang on his thin frame, further hiding his identity. He absentmindedly pulled the cap down further over his eyes.
Since nearly everyone in the fleet was displaced, he had easily obtained entrance onto the various ships he bounced to and from. He wasn’t sure where he would ultimately end up, but no one had questioned him thus far. He was on his way to a small freighter called, “Relief.” He found the name ironic, but since word was they were in need of crew, he was en route. He rolled his neck in a pathetic attempt to soften the stiffness in his shoulders. He longed for the drugs that Cottle administered to take the edge off. His stomach growled in hunger as well. He wrapped an arm around his middle and breathed deeply. He had no idea his misery could get worse, yet it did.
It had been over a day since he’d been able to eat. The plight of the people crammed into the ships had overwhelmed him. As a newcomer, he’d been ushered through the worst areas, crowded holds with makeshift tents providing the only privacy. Families waited in long lines for meals and to use heads. As dismal as it seemed, he could sense strong currents of community among them. That was his problem. No one opened up to him. They saw him as an outsider, probably there to mooch their own meager supplies. He wasn’t welcomed. He was often served only half what the others were. He had shrugged it off and eventually had moved on to another ship. No one had come close to recognizing him.
Soon the ship landed and he fought his way to the front. He stepped onto the strange deck and was shoved from behind. “Move it. We got better places to get to.” The pilot pulled the hatch shut and Lee stepped quickly away.
“What the frak do you want here?” A tough looking man stepped up to Lee.
Lee stuttered over his words. “I heard there was work here.”
“Work? Why the frak you wanna work? Ain’t no need. No one’s gonna pay ya.”
Lee summoned some long lost confidence. “Better then sittin’ on my ass doin’ nothin’.”
The man burst into laughter. It was deep and hearty. Lee relaxed and smiled slightly.
“Welcome to Relief. Name’s Pergus. I guess I’m the crew chief.” He eyed Lee more closely. “You don’t look like you could put in a day’s work.”
Lee tried standing a little straighter. “I can handle whatever you dish out.”
“You ever worked on a ship before?”
Lee nodded.
“Where you been since the attacks?” Pergus didn’t like that this man was suddenly appearing on the ship. No one came to Relief. She was one of the oldest and shakiest ships in the fleet. He knew there were betting pools on other ships about when Relief would be blown up.
“I’ve been bouncing from ship to ship.” Lee lied somewhat. It didn’t sit well with him, but he supposed he was going to have to get used to it.
“And why are you here?” Pergus narrowed in on him.
“I’m tired.” Lee didn’t lie. “I just want someplace to call home. I’m tired of fighting.”
Pergus found the comment strange. “You been fighting any different than the rest of us? We’re all fightin’ them damn Cylons. That don’t change with the ship.”
Lee grew angry. How could this man dare compare his simple life here to the battles Lee had endured? “Look! I heard you needed more crew, so I came. Do you want me or not?”
Pergus studied the man standing before him. He knew he was hiding something, but his gut told him to go with it. “Can I count on you or you gonna bury yourself in a bottle?”
Lee’s stomach grumbled loudly again before he could answer. Lee blushed and Pergus broke into another fit of laughter. “What’s your name, kid?”
Kid? Lee couldn’t believe it. He didn’t think Pergus was all that much older than he was and yet he was calling him kid? He had once been a Captain in the Colonial Fleet, CAG of the Battlestar Galactica. He shrugged the name aside, praying it didn’t stick. “Joe.”
“Joe what?”
“Do you really need more?” Lee asked quietly.
“Are you runnin’ from the law, kid?” Pergus asked seriously.
“No. Just starting life over.” Lying was coming easier and easier to him.
Pergus clasped him on the back. “Come on, Joe. Let’s get you some food and then get you a bunk.” He glanced around. “You got any gear?”
‘Joe’ shook his head. “No. It went with the old life.”
Pergus nodded. “Fair enough. Let’s go.” Pergus noted the distinct limp as the man walked next to him. He couldn’t help but wonder what the kid had been through.
Pergus guided Lee through old, narrow gangways. It seemed to Lee like a maze and his concern must have registered. “Don’t worry about it, kiddo. It ain’t as bad as it looks. You’ll catch on faster than you think.” Pergus was greeted warmly by anyone they passed. They entered a galley and Pergus directed Lee to a table. “Sit down. You don’t look like you could handle a tray anyway. I’ll bring it to ya.”
Captain Lee Adama would have never allowed it, but Joe sank gratefully to the chair and waited. His spirits lifted as he saw Pergus approach carrying a steaming bowl. Lee dug into the bowl; it’s searing warmth spreading through his bones. He’d completed it quickly, hardly acknowledging Pergus’s presence. When he finished, he blushed. “Thanks.”
Pergus said nothing. He took the empty bowl, stood and left. He returned a minute later with the bowl refilled. Lee eyed him, suspiciously. “What about rations?”
“Frak the rations. It don’t seem you’ve had your fair share lately. Eat up. I even saw a cookie behind the counter when you’re finished.” Pergus smiled warmly. He had no idea what it was about this kid, but something told him he was special.
Lee knew he was lost when a lone tear threatened to slip from the corner of his eye at the simple act of kindness. He took several deep breaths to control his emotions and consumed the second bowl of soup with as much gusto.
When he finished, Pergus asked him if he wanted more. Lee shook his head; afraid his stomach wouldn’t be able to handle it. Pergus rose again, taking the whole tray this time. He returned a minute later with two mugs of coffee. A cookie was indeed balanced on one cup. “Here. Always round off your dinner with a treat.”
Lee accepted the mug and wrapped his numb fingers around the hot ceramic. He stared at the cookie. “Do you always get to round off your meals with a cookie here?” Sweets were a rare treasure on Galactica.
“Only in your mind, Kiddo. Appreciate it while you can. Frak, the coffee ain’t much either, but in your mind, it can be from the
finest bistro in
Lee was quiet, enjoying the warmth on his hands. “My mind doesn’t work so well these days.”
Pergus nodded. “We all got those days.” He took a large swig of his own drink and then questioned further. “So, care to enlighten me on where you’ve been all these months?”
Lee suddenly wondered if he’d ever find a place to hide in the fleet. It seemed even Pergus was about to send him packing. “I told you, here and there. Nothing seemed to fit.”
“So how’d you come to be in this state?” Pergus quietly asked. “The people of the fleet ain’t got much, but I didn’t think anyone was starving.”
Lee couldn’t look the man in the eyes. He concentrated on the mug in his hands. “I got sick.”
“Sick?”
Lee knew he wasn’t buying it. “I was attacked. I haven’t been able to…” He didn’t know how to go on. His whole sordid story suddenly felt like spilling out. He clamped up tight.
Pergus backed off. They drank their coffee in silence. He contemplated the young man before him. He was a pathetic sight, but there seemed to be an inner strength or confidence simmering just below the surface. He had no idea why, but he felt like Relief had just gotten a gift from the gods. He noted the slump in the kid’s shoulders and the droop to his eyes. He was fading fast. In that instant he made a decision.
“Come on. Let’s get you into a rack before you fall asleep at the table.” Pergus stood. Lee tried to stand, but his legs failed him, their strength gone. Pergus noted the fumble. He stepped around the table and grasped Lee firmly under the arm. He felt Lee wince at the pressure on his shoulder. Pergus tugged him gently up. “Keep ‘em going. It’s only a bit further down the hall.”
Lee accepted the strength and willed his legs into action. They moved slowly. Pergus guided him into a small room. There were only two bunks. Pergus led him to one and settled him.
Lee glanced around the room, allowing Pergus to help remove his boots. “Semi-Private racks?”
Pergus noted the military term, but said nothing. “These here are my quarters. I figure you could use a bit more privacy and this is about the best I can do for ya.”
Lee stared at the man, stunned at the gesture of kindness for a stranger. He muttered, “thanks.”
Lee felt like a child but had no strength to fight it. He allowed Pergus to pull off the outer layers of his ragged, dirty clothing and then be guided back onto the bunk. His body cried out at the contact with the soft bunk. Lee’s eyes rolled into his head and closed briefly. A sigh escaped his lips. He could feel the blankets being pulled up his body. He again felt himself wanting to cry at the tender care. He tried to explain the feeling to Pergus. “I… I…”
“Shush now, Kiddo. You’re tired and you need sleep. I expect you’ll make it up to me when you’ve had a good rest.” Pergus rested his hand lightly on Lee’s chest, as a father once had.
Lee opened his eyes and stared at the large, caring man almost expecting to see the man he once called father. Lee would not disappoint this man. “I will. I promise.” He closed his eyes and let sleep claim him.
Pergus moved to his own bunk and watched the sleeping man. “You need a good rest is all. Then you’ll do big things, kid.”
** ~ **
It had been weeks and there was no sign of Lee in the fleet. One group of marines was led to a passenger holding area, but a shuttle had just taken off. If Lee had indeed been there, he had escaped again.
Adama hardly ever left his quarters now. Tigh and Roslin had both been stunned when he sent them each a note asking them to meet him there. Tigh met her shuttle and they walked to his quarters. “Any idea what this is about, Colonel?” She asked.
“None. He doesn’t talk to anyone.” He replied, dejectedly.
“Is there any word on Captain Apollo?” She knew the answer, but had to ask.
“No. As insane as it is to believe, if anyone could hide from us in this fleet, Lee would be the one.” Tigh had no idea what to believe about the whole situation. He had once placed Lee Adama in the category of people he valued. Since Lee had held a gun to his head and plotted against him, for whatever reasons, he hadn’t made up his mind about him. Most of the time of late, he was filled with anger at the stupid decision the captain had made. Didn’t he know how this was killing his father? Could he be so insecure of his father’s love?
President Roslin stopped, just short of the Commander’s quarters. “I’m afraid to go in there. I have a feeling this is going to be bad news.”
Tigh wasn’t about to admit the same fears, so he played dumb. “He couldn’t have received anything. It would have come through CIC. Maybe he’s come to his senses and is going to call off the search for Lee.”
“Come to his senses? Do you think a father could ever give up on his son?” Roslin had never seen eye-to-eye with Tigh, but this seemed extreme, even for him.
“Well, it’s obvious the son gave up on the father. The ungrateful bastard.” He added the slander absentmindedly.
“COLONEL!” Roslin struggled to contain her temper. “You can’t even begin to appreciate what Captain Apollo has been through. He has every right to…” She stopped suddenly angry with Apollo as well.
Tigh finished her words. “Every right to redirect his pain on others and hurt his own father?”
“He doesn’t consider me his father anymore.” The Commander heard the two approaching through his slightly opened hatch. When they stopped, he stepped out to greet them. Roslin and Tigh stared open mouthed at Adama. He ignored their discomfort and waved them inside, very relaxed. “Come in, please.”
Roslin noted how calm Adama seemed. It was a far cry from the agitation he’d barely suppressed all these weeks. “Commander, what did you mean?”
“Lee has disowned me. He no longer wishes to be my son. That’s why he left.” Adama moved to his desk and finished placing a stack of folders in a box.
Roslin noted the box and scanned the room to find more. “What are you doing, Commander?”
“I’m packing. I’ve done this twice now. This time’s for good.” He replied evenly.
“Why?” Roslin seemed the only one capable of speech.
Adama rose and handed the President a letter. “This is my official resignation.”
“WHAT!” She and Tigh both exclaimed.
Adama chuckled at the response. “Let’s hope that’s not the last time you two agree.” He sobered and continued. “It’s effective immediately. I’ll be out of here shortly.”
Tigh was silent, overwhelmed by the implications. Roslin demanded further explanation. “Commander, you can’t be serious. You can’t resign. I won’t accept it.”
“You have no choice.” He looked her straight in the eye. “It’s done.”
“But why? Why now? We need you.” She pleaded. “I don’t understand. You’ll have to make me understand.”
Adama took a deep breath and looked away from her to the picture of his young family on his desk. He stared at it as he spoke. “My son has spent his whole life doubting my love because I have always placed my job before my family. I won’t do that to him any more. I can’t. I don’t have it in me anymore.” He was shockingly candid.
Roslin couldn’t argue against the paternal feelings. “He needs time. He knows you love him. He knows you did what you had to do. You need to give this more time.”
Tigh barely controlled his rage. He blurted out. “So, Zeus wins? You cave and the fleet pays the price.”
Adama met him head on. “Yes. Zeus won. I won’t sacrifice my son again. It’ll be easier for you won’t it? You have nothing to care about. No one for them to use against you.” William Adama never knew he could deliver such a low blow to his friend. They all knew he was mocking Tigh’s marriage. There was just no way either of these two people would or could ever understand.
Adama shook his head, leveling his anger. “Madame President, it’s been my honor.” He grasped the picture and walked over to the duffle bag on his bed, placing it tenderly within.
Roslin followed him. “You can’t do this.”
Adama spoke quietly. “Word will get out in the fleet that I’m no longer in charge and Lee will hear that. Maybe then he’ll come and find me.”
Roslin smiled with relief. “So this is a plan?” She chuckled. “For a moment, I thought you were serious.”
He looked at her. “I am.”
Roslin paled. “It won’t work. He’ll know it’s a trick. This isn’t the way Commander.”
“You can call me Bill, now. No more title.”
Roslin begged now. “You can’t do this. We need you. The fleet needs you. HUMANITY needs you, COMMANDER!”
Adama swallowed hard several times and spoke softly, ever in control. “Will humanity be able to drown out my son’s pain as they pumped electricity through him? Will humanity be able to purge the sight of my son being beaten with a lead pipe? Can they drown out the sound of his bones breaking or worse, his screams as they plunged a knife into his body over and over again? All this was done to him for one reason and one reason only, to get to me. All I had to do was give up the code, but I choose humanity over my own son. Tell me how are they going to return the favor?” He paused letting his words sink in further. “It wasn’t humanity who held my son in their arms and listened to him beg to die. He begged ME to end his misery and kill him and lords help me, I was going to. What more could humanity possibly ask of me?” He paused. “Humanity owes me this at the very least. She’ll have to defend herself. I’m done.”
Roslin was numb. She’d never heard the Commander so passionate. For this first time since entering the political world, she had no words.
Tigh shook off his astonishment and stepped forward, his anger forgotten. He laid a hand on Adama’s duffle. “What will you do?” He had known his friend long enough to see when his mind was made up. Bill Adama had sacrificed too much for the military. He’d always been able to justify it, until now.
Adama’s voice cracked at the simple gesture. “I have to find him.”
Tigh kept his hand on the bag. “Then do it. But your home will always be here.” He gestured around the room. “You need somewhere to rest.”
Adama was moved at the offer but couldn’t accept it. “Where’s he resting?”
Tigh smiled and moved his hand to his friend’s shoulder. “He’s Lee Adama. He’s taking care of himself, as he always has.”
“Because he didn’t have a father to do it for him.”
“No, because his father is Bill Adama. He’s a survivor, just like his old man. Don’t you remember how Caroline would complain? Lee was too much like his father, too independent. Stay here, we can still help.”
Adama nodded, accepting the offer. “Thank you, but only until I find him.”
Tigh nodded. He looked at a stunned Roslin and pulled her from the room. He closed the hatch behind him and spoke low. “We have to find him first.”
“What did you just do?” She finally demanded.
“I bought us some time.” He scowled. “I want to be in command about as much as you want me in command. All we have to do is tell people who ask that he’s on leave to find his son. No one will doubt that.”
“And if he finds Lee first?”
“We will make sure that doesn’t happen. I don’t know what resources you have that we don’t, but I suggest you start calling in every favor you can.”
The shiny blade came at him again and again. He longed to call out for help but his voice had vanished. He found some inner strength and pushed the arms that held him away. He backed up and assumed a defensive stance.
“Whoa! Now, Kiddo.” Pergus pulled back slightly, allowing Lee breathing room. “I was just trying to wake you from that nightmare of yours.”
Lee shook his head and wiped at his eyes. “Pergus?” His voice was shaking with sleep and unspent terror.
“Sure, Kiddo. It’s just old Pergus. I figured it was high time we got you up and moving. Probably should force some more food into your gullet too.”
Lee looked around the room, not quite sure where he was. “How long?” He stretched at his arms and legs, finding them surprisingly mobile.
“Two days.” Pergus chuckled.
Lee’s eyes flew open with alarm. “TWO DAYS? I’ve been sleeping two days?” He calmed himself. “Why?”
“I suppose you needed the rest.” Pergus moved to the table and poured Lee a glass of water.
Taking the offered glass and drinking deeply, Lee finally spoke again when his thirst was quenched. “I mean, why did you let me sleep so long.”
“I told you. You needed the rest.” It seemed so simple to Pergus.
“But you let me?” Lee was stunned. He had spent so long on constant alert that two days of uninterrupted sleep was inconceivable.
“Here” Pergus threw a towel at him. “You could use a good, long, hot shower. I can’t promise long or hot, but the shower’s in there.” He watched a small smile form on Lee’s lips.
“So, that’s me that smells so ripe?”
Pergus laughed. “Sure is, Kiddo. I put a new razor and a clean set of clothes on the counter for you.” He grabbed at Lee’s chin. “Let’s see what this mop is hiding too.”
Lee knew he wouldn’t shave, but when he saw his face in the small mirror, he figured he must have been scaring small children lately. His cheeks were sunken and his both eyes sported dark, hollow circles. Standing in the hot shower zapped him of his strength and as he stepped out, he stumbled.
Pergus quickly entered and stooped to help Lee to his feet. “You ok, Joe?” He didn’t hear Lee’s answer. He was staring at the still red scars on Lee’s body. Lee blushed at the attention and grabbed the towel to wrap around his waist.
“Damn it, Joe. What the frak happened?” Pergus reached out and touched the nearest jagged red line on Lee’s shoulder.
Lee couldn’t meet his glare. “I told you, I was attacked.”
“Damn, no wonder you left where you were. I hope they got the bastards.”
It hit Lee then that he had no idea what had happened to his attackers. “I don’t know really. I guess so.” He searched his mind, but the time was still fuzzy.
Pergus left him to finish cleaning up. Lee stepped out of the small room some time later, feeling more alive than he had in months. “Reporting for duty?”
Pergus looked up from the part he was working on, noting the military language. “Decided not to lose it, huh?”
Lee grinned and rubbed at the now trimmed beard on his face. “I’m kinda used to it. Doesn’t it look better?”
Pergus laughed. “Your looks ain’t important to me. I’d say you’re almost ready to tackle my engines.”
“Engines?” Lee looked a little paler. He could take his viper apart and put it back together, but somehow the ship’s engine seemed more daunting.
Pergus, always quick with a laugh, relieved his stress. “I said almost. Let’s get more food into you and start you on something smaller.”
Lee smiled. “I can handle that.”
Lee settled into life on the Relief. He spent long days working side by side with Relief’s other men, trying to keep the old ship going. He was reminded of the dedication Galactica’s crew showed the old ship. Pergus had his hands full. Half of his men didn’t care and drank their shifts away. They created more issues than repairs. Lee learned quickly and he fast became Pergus’s right hand. He didn’t share much of his life and no one pried and yet easy friendships had formed. Life was simple and straightforward. There were no emotional games or wars.
The days of tough labor had once again firmed his body. With Pergus to nag him, three square meals a day had also filled out his once gaunt features. Despite the teasing, Lee still wouldn’t shave the beard, nor cut his hair, which was longer than he’d ever worn it. It annoyed him to be honest. Small curls formed around his ears and they tickled him at the worst times.
There were moments of tension for Lee. There was the day that the Captain was on the deck. He was working on a fuel line with a man named Gunnar, when Pergus hollered “Captain!” Lee jumped up and looked over to his friend on instinct.
Gunnar burst out laughing. “You got lofty dreams, kid.” Everyone now called him ‘kid’, to his chagrin. “You ain’t never gonna command a ship.”
Lee looked back at him, something vaguely like loss in his eyes, “You got that right.”
Then there was the inevitable search of the ship by Galactica’s marines. Lee immediately recognized several of the men and ducked his head further into the vent he was repairing. Pergus led the squad around and they met with the ship’s Captain not far from where Lee worked. He held his breath as he listened to their exchange.
He heard Pergus’s voice first. “Captain, these here marines are searching for an officer from the Galactica that’s gone AWOL.”
“AWOL? That’s despicable. We’d never harbor such a fool.” The captain replied full of conviction. He spoke to Pergus. “We haven’t taken on any former military, have we?”
Not only did Lee hold his breath but he was sure his heart stop beating as he waited for Pergus’ response.
“No, Sir. We only get the riffraff of the fleet over here.”
A marine pulled out a picture. “Perhaps the Captain should look at this picture.”
The Captain laughed. “Show it to Pergus. He’s the only one on board who knows everyone. If he doesn’t know him, I certainly won’t. Good luck with your search, Men. We can’t have these military giving up on us now can we?” The captain, in the position by sheer fate alone, left the men.
Pergus risked a glance to the backside sticking out of the vent nearby as he scanned the picture. “Nope, ain’t seen this guy. He’s way too perty to be on this barge. If I see him though, I’ll be sure to let Galactica know.”
Lee finally released his breath. He knew Pergus now knew his secret and wondered how long it would be before he confronted him.
Pergus led the squad away, back toward their ship. As they crossed the deck, he plied the Marine for more information. He ushered them back onto their ship and waved as they left. He returned to work, saddened at his impending loss.
** ~ **
It had been years since William Adama had worn civilian clothes on a regular basis. He spent days at a time exploring various ships in the fleet with one purpose in mind: find his son. He did his best to put himself in Lee’s position. He tried to think like Lee. He knew, no matter how much hurt he was feeling; Lee would never sit idly by.
Adama didn’t talk to ship’s Captains. He wandered about their crews. He couldn’t help but witness the power of the human spirit in these ships. He saw what people were making due with and yet they still managed to celebrate their lives. Pride swelled in his heart but he wouldn’t allow himself to enjoy it. He chided himself repeatedly for allowing something to interfere with his purpose. Humanity owed him, right?
He had been searching for weeks now. He’d lost track of how many. He stepped off the shuttle on the civilian deck and crossed without making eye contact with any of the crew. When he first left his quarters on Galactica, dressed in civies, he’d received many stares. Many of his crew had done double takes. They could tell from the look on his face that he wasn’t to be approached.
Adama was curious that as time wore on no one spoke to him. He knew his crew would be disappointed and upset by his decision to leave the service, but he didn’t expect that they’d ignore him. He thought they would at least understand his need to heal his own family. He thought he’d shown them time and again that they were a family. He was loathed to admit that he missed their greetings. He couldn’t recall a time when he felt more empty or alone. It startled him. He always figured himself for a loner.
He escaped to the emptiness of his quarters. He sat on the edge of his rack and pulled the familiar picture into his hands. “Why Lee? Why can’t we heal this? I need… I need to at least know you’re alright.” He knew Cottle checked all the morgues in the fleet. If Lee were dead, he would know, right?
** ~ **
Lee was packing the meager possessions he had come to own in the past few weeks when Pergus entered.
“Moving out?”
“I don’t expect you to lie for me.” Lee zipped the bag shut. “I’ll catch the next shuttle.” Lee walked past.
Pergus held his hand out and caught Lee center chest. “I didn’t lie.”
Lee scowled and looked around the room to buy himself time. “I was there, Pergus. I heard you. You covered for me and I appreciate it, but I can’t let you do that.”
“I didn’t do anything for you.” He gently shoved Lee back and he fell into a chair. “Those guys showed me a picture of a clean shaven, short haired Colonial Captain. I didn’t lie. We don’t have anybody like that around here.”
Lee looked away, the space between his eyes crinkled with stress. “You know who I am.”
Pergus took a seat opposite Lee. “You’re Joe. A hard working man who came to me a mess. You were beaten, hungry and lost. I gave you some food, put you to work and probably taught you a thing or two.” He watched Lee closely for a reaction. “You don’t strike me as the type who runs away from things.”
Lee’s voice was quiet. “I do now.”
Pergus took Lee’s bag. “This is mine.” He unzipped it and dumped the contents back on the bed. “The Marine told me the guy they’re looking for is Lee Adama, the Commander’s only son.”
“The Commander is better off without his disappointment of a son.” Lee stated flatly.
“I doubt any father is better off without his son.”
“This one is.”
“Well… I don’t know, but I know one thing.”
“What’s that?” Lee asked, feeling somewhat secure.
“I got me a right hand man named Joe. Joe still has problems. He still wakes up in a cold sweat most nights from nightmares of the past, but not as often. If this Lee Adama ever shows up and decides he’s ready to go home, that’s fine.” He paused. “Now, how’s about you get to the aft C deck and fix that electrical outlet.”
Lee stood, smiling. “Lee Adama is dead, Pergus.” He walked past him, without the duffle.
“I doubt it.” Pergus said quietly and then called after him. “That may be, but I bet his father would feel relief knowing one way or the other.”
Lee stepped back into the room. “I… He knows where we stand.”
“Then why is he still searching?”
** ~ **
Tom Zarek entered the cell slowly. He hated dealing with this man. “What did you want?”
“Have I not been here long enough?”
“The marines are still searching for the Captain.” Zarek replied easily.
The tall, gaunt man stepped forward. “Zarek, I do not care if the Captain is alive or dead. I want off this pathetic hellhole. Make it happen.”
Zarek stood his ground. “You want to risk running into a squadron of Galactica marines or worse, the good Captain himself?”
Zeus laughed. “Obviously, the good Captain has lost his marbles or he would have never left the ship anyway. Besides, if I see him, I will simply finish the job. We cannot run this fleet with the Adamas in charge.”
Zarek turned to leave, not interested in the man’s ramblings. As he clicked the gate shut, he looked at the tall man. “Never underestimate the Adamas.”
“He’s out there. He’s fine. He’ll come back on his own. You have to stop this.” Kara Thrace was not above begging the Commander to return to duty.
Adama stared at her. “I’ve got no choice.” He added lightly. “And since there’s no reason to rush back, I’ll take all the time I want.”
“What do you mean ‘no reason to rush back’? Tigh’s in charge? We need you back in CIC where you belong. You’ve been on leave long enough.”
“Leave?” He asked, incredulously.
Kara grew more scared than ever. “Yes, you need to end the leave now.” She held her breath, afraid of his reply.
“I’m not on leave. I resigned.” He stated simply.
Kara went numb. “No. You’re on leave.” She watched his face and knew they fleet had been duped. She felt the same burn of disappointment she’d felt when she discovered Adama didn’t know the way to earth. She shook her head. “No, you’re not.” There was silence in the room. “Why did you do it?”
Adama had no magic way to help Kara understand that didn’t involve opening up to her. “Lee. I did this for Lee.”
Kara shook her head angrily now. “NO. Lee was hurting. Given time, he’d see the whole picture and understand. He’s a warrior. He’s all about saving lives. He knows deep down you did what you had to do. How many times do we have to go over this?”
Adama shook his head and smiled. “It’s not that. You’re right. Lee would have come to understand what happened.”
“So? You said it was for Lee. How is your resignation helping him?” She held an angry stance.
Adama paused, capturing his words carefully. “When… When you were missing on that moon, Lee and I were committed to finding you. You’re family. We weren’t giving up on finding you.”
Kara softened a bit, praying more guilt was not about to be hefted on her. “So, this is my fault?”
Adama shook his head. “Lee stopped me in the corridor at one point, when we’d finally been forced to call off the search, he was questioning why we’d done all this. I told him it was because you were family and he agreed… but…” Adama stopped at the painful memory. It had hurt him then, but now it was like a jagged, open wound. “He questioned whether I would have done it for him.” He left the words hand in the air.
Kara was stunned. “He didn’t. You misunderstood him.”
“No. He said, ‘and if it were me?’” He watched Kara’s face closely. “I didn’t believe he was serious. I said that. I told him he didn’t need to ask. He said he did.” Adama looked away, too overwhelmed now. He held his composure in check and finished without looking back. “I told him if it were him, I’d never leave.”
“I know you’d never leave him.” She knew she had just admitted justification of his actions, but hoped he’d ignore it.
He finally looked back. “You and I might know it, but as much as he wanted to believe it, I saw his eyes, he didn’t. Lee can’t believe it because I’ve NEVER put him first.”
Kara was deflated. “He wouldn’t want this.”
Adama nodded. “No, he wouldn’t.”
Kara made a vain attempt to compromise. “So, you’ll find him and then come back?”
He shook his head.
“We can’t do this without you.” She whispered.
“Yes, you can.”
She began to laugh, heartily. “You’ll go nuts. What do you think you’re going to do when you find Lee and you two are at peace?”
Adama laughed with her. “Making peace with Lee could take the rest of my natural life.” He sobered. “I thought I might set up a flight school on one of the other ships. I could still help out then.”
Kara breathed deeply. “You know they haven’t told the fleet.”
“So it seems. I’ll speak to the President about that.”
Anger suddenly welled up within her again. “HOW CAN YOU BE SO SELFISH AT A TIME LIKE THIS?”
Adama was going to ignore her anger. He moved to a chair near the desk and picked up a file. He tried picking the next ship to explore.
Kara stood before him. “Answer me!”
He didn’t look up. “When I held my son in my arms and he begged me to kill him, I realized I had lost most of my soul. How else could I have been in this situation? I’ll never forget that moment. If I don’t do something, I will lose my entire soul. What good would that do anyone? Besides…” He stammered. Kara knew what would follow had to be huge. “I can’t do it anymore. I couldn’t go through this again. I can’t put my son in danger.”
There was silence again and she knew what he was saying. She wasn’t sure she ever wanted to see Lee in harm’s way again either. Kara glanced at his list. “You’re doing it wrong.”
“Kara, I’m not going to continue this argument.”
She grabbed the list from his hands. “You’ve been trying to think like Lee.”
“Of course.”
“Don’t you see? Most people would go to the farthest point in the fleet. You assumed Lee would do the opposite and hide in plain site.”
It hit Adama like a lightening bolt. “Oh lords, he’s hiding in the farthest corner.”
“That’s where I’d start.” Kara left Adama alone, not sure where she was going or what she was going to tell anyone.
** ~ **
Pergus saw Captain Roberts arrive on the deck and sweat trickled down his neck. Life was just plain easier if Roberts stayed in his quarters, entertaining his usual influx of women. When he tried being a Captain, it usually mucked things up worse. Pergus had turned a blind eye to more than one suspicious activity on board. “Captain Roberts, what brings you to the deck?”
Pergus straightened his cuff. “I’m meeting a guest.”
“Yourself? Don’t you usually send one of the crew?” Pergus inquired, trying to sound jovial and non-threatening.
“This man is special. If he asks you for anything, see to it you get it for him with all due haste.”
“Aye, aye, Skipper.” Pergus knew the Captain was annoyed at the title.
The landing alarm sounded and the men waited for the all clear. Two of Pergus’s deck hands moved in, secured the shuttle and opened the latch. Pergus made himself busy near enough to witness the meeting. A tall, gaunt man stepped off the platform and walked to the Captain.
Captain Roberts beamed with pride. “Welcome to Relief. I’m sure your stay will be profitable.”
The newcomer scanned the deck. “It certainly is not much, is it?”
Roberts laughed to pass off the embarrassment. “She may not look like much, but we have access to anything you’ll need.”
“Good. We have to get our plans in action again. We have been sitting for too long.”
“Let me show you to your quarters.” Roberts gestured away and the tall man followed.
A cold mist settled over Pergus’s heart as the men left. He knew something bad had just come on board.
** ~ **
Adama was preparing to leave again. He’d chosen his next ship and there was a sense of hope in his heart. He hadn’t enjoyed opening up to Kara as he had, but in the end, it had eased his anguished heart. Somehow, knowing she now seemed to understand left him feeling less burdened. He paused at the knock on the door.
“Come in.”
Tigh entered. “You heading out already?” Tigh was carrying several file folders.
“I had a good idea. I don’t want to lose the momentum.”
“Lee’s fine, you know that, right?” Tigh never gave up on the thought of bringing both Adama’s back to CIC where they belonged.
Adama nodded. “I hope so at least.” He rolled his neck, but guilt wouldn’t allow him to ignore the files. “Was there something you needed?”
Tigh sighed. “I was wondering if you’d look these over.” He handed three files to Adama, retaining one.
Adama smiled. “You don’t need my help with these. You’ve been doing these reports in your sleep for years.”
Tigh blushed, knowing he was busted. “I wasn’t trying to run everything then.” He paused and then continued. “I think we should reassign a few more squadrons of marines.”
“If that’s what you think is best.”
“To finding Lee.” Tigh added. “We need you two back on duty.”
Adama shook his head. “Lee might, but I’m done. I told you.”
Tigh’s anger bellowed out. “FRAK THAT! You can’t continue to think you’re not coming back. WE NEED YOU! I CAN’T DO THIS!” Without asking, he marched to Adama’s liquor cabinet and poured himself a drink, as if to prove his point.
Adama took the glass from his hand. “You’re doing fine.”
Tigh took the drink back and slammed it. “Take a look at this before you go back out there.”
Adama opened the file and read, his face growing angrier. He closed the folder and moved a drawer across the room. He pulled out a side arm, checked the cartridge and tucked it into his waistband. “Good to know. All the more reason to find Lee.”
“I’ve got a maniac trying to overthrow the fleet using the military and a massive food shortage to contend with which is causing riots in the fleet and you think I can handle it.” He’d stated his point well and he knew it.
Adama looked away for a few moments then back to Tigh. He pointed to the desk. “How many times have we sat at that desk and talked about how fine our crew was? How often have they proved it to us in recent months? You’re doing fine. All you’ve ever needed was a little confidence.”
Tigh muttered. “All I ever wanted was your shadow.” More loudly he said. “I never wanted this. You pulled me back. You don’t have the right to fail me now.”
The word failure stung Adama but he refused to acknowledge it. “All the more need for me to find Lee. Zeus will die before he hurts anyone again.” He walked past Tigh, leaving him alone in the office.
** ~ **
The man, known only as Zeus, studied the small room closely. “It is not much is it?”
Captain Roberts coughed. “It’s the best we have at the moment. I… I was hoping to use the influx of funds to refurbish several of the rooms.”
“We will need to begin using your warehouses soon. The others are too full. It is too obvious. Someone in the fleet will get suspicious.”
“The, ah… food rationing hasn’t hit us hard. We were well supplied before all this. Is it a problem elsewhere?”
Zeus smiled his evil, sickly smile. “Of course, as was the plan.”
“I thought the plan was to take over Galactica?” Roberts nervously pressed.
“As it is.”
Lee didn’t complain about the increased workload, but his senses told him something wasn’t right. For the past few days, shuttles were landing with some frequency and when they did, the usual deck hands were ushered elsewhere for several hours.
Pergus told Lee that cargo from another ship was being stored in the hold.
“But why Relief?” His brow furrowed from thought. His mind was clicking through all the information he’d once easily recalled. “I hate to say it but she’s not exactly reliable.” He watched Pergus stiffen from wounded pride. “You know it’s the truth Pergus. There has to be more to this. Tell me more about the guy that came on board.”
Pergus shook his head. He stepped closer and whispered. “I thought Lee Adama was dead?”
Lee flushed with anger. He stumbled over his reply. “I… He is. This is common sense, Pergus. You know something isn’t right.”
“Kid, all I know is my job. We workin’ men don’t question. We just do. We ain’t leaders. Leaders question. That’s why they change things.”
Lee shook his head in frustration. “Ok, ok. I get the message. Leave it be. Let it alone.”
Both men returned to the sensor they were repairing. They worked in silence. Pergus knew “Lee” could never let the issue drop. “He wasn’t anything special. He was tall and thin, kinda looked sickly.”
For some reason, Lee paled at the description but he didn’t know why it bothered him. “Anyone else come on board and stay?”
Pergus shook his head. “You expectin’ anyone? Miss hiding from Marines?”
Lee’s answer was short. “No. Why are you pushing me? You want me to leave?”
Pergus calmly stood back. “Joe, you’re a fine man. Anyone can see that. But there’s something else anyone can see.”
Lee smoldered. “What’s that?” He fairly spit the words out.
“This isn’t the life for you, Kid. You were destined for more than this. You were meant for bigger things.” Pergus wiped the grime from his hands.
“PERGUS! You have no right to say something like that!” Lee was struggling to find his typical, tight, emotional control. Only Lee would fight a compliment.
Pergus remained calm. “Kiddo, denying who you are is no way to live.”
Lee didn’t attempt to hide his anger. “I thought you understood. You said…”
“No one else is questioning anything here. Only you.” Pergus set the rag he’d clutched down and left. He stopped out side the door and took several deep breaths. That hadn’t been easy but he had known for some time it had to happen.
He walked down the hall and entered the small room. “He’s down the hall if you want to talk to him now, although I just got him all riled up, so it might not be the best time.”
“There’s never seems to be a good time for us to talk.” William Adama rose from the bunk. He made for the door.
“Hey, Commander!” Pergus quickly corrected himself. “Bill.” He tossed him a small box. “He needs this part.”
Bill Adama had hit Relief that morning and been met by Pergus. He never immediately identified himself. His lack of uniform and dark stocking cap allowed him to pass relatively unnoticed.
“Hey, where do you think you’re going?” Pergus had almost had to run him down.
Adama stopped at the question. “I thought I’d look around. Is that a problem?”
“You can’t just come on board a ship and do whatever ya like. It ain’t safe.” Pergus
bristled at the man’s audacity. “What
are ya looking for?”
“Why do I have to be looking for someone?” Adama realized his mistake instantly.
Pergus calmed and eyed the man closely, the truth
suddenly hitting him. “Didn’t
ask if you were looking for someone.
But since you are, let’s cut to the chase.” He left the ball in Adama’s court.
“My name is Bill and I’m looking for my son.” Adama started to pull out a picture from his
pocket.
Pergus pushed his hand back. “I don’t need to see that picture. Come with me, Commander.” He led Adama down a long hall to his
quarters. He knew Lee was elsewhere and
wouldn’t show up for hours. They settled
in chairs and without asking, Pergus poured them each a drink.
“So, I’m workin’ one day, some
time back, and this bag of bones steps off a shuttle. We don’t get company often, so he can’t
exactly blend in. No one wants to come
to Relief unless they’re hiding.”
Adama cut him off.
“Is he ok?” He was genuinely
concerned about Lee’s health. Major
Cottle had worried about pneumonia developing without proper medical care.
Pergus chuckled.
“He’s come along just fine. He’s
settled in and does a fine job.”
It was Adama’s turn to chuckle. “He always does. What’s he doing?”
“Whatever needs doing” Pergus took a long drink from his
cup. “I don’t know everything that
happened to him but I know it had to be terrible.”
Adama was both optimistic and disappointed. He was relieved to know Lee might have
finally been able to open up with this man but saddened that it wasn’t he that
Lee had confided in. “He told you then?”
Pergus shook his head.
“Not a word. The only thing I
know is what he’s muttered…” He added quietly, “or screamed in his sleep. He stills gets nightmares. He thinks he’s controlling them and that I
don’t know.”
“That sounds like my son as well. He’s stubborn.” Adama felt he could trust this man. “Has he said anything else?”
“He goes by the name Joe.
No one here knows who he is, just me.
He tells me Lee Adama is dead.”
Adama cringed at the thought of Lee dead. “Has he…” He couldn’t finish the
sentence. It sounded pathetic even to
him.
“No. He won’t talk
about you. I tried to get him to at
least let you know he was ok, but he said you already knew where you stood.”
Again, the harsh truth made Adama cringe. He practically whispered. “I don’t like where we’re standing.” He settled himself. “I don’t expect you to help me. I wouldn’t ask you to betray his trust, but I
will see him.”
“You need to.”
Pergus thought a moment. “I’ll be
working with him later this afternoon.
Hang out here and I’ll get ya later
today.” He pointed to a small engine on
the other end of the table. “If ya get bored, work on that.
Fraker keeps breakin’
down.”
Adama chuckled and gazed at the motor, wondering if he
could indeed fix it.
** ~ **
Lee struggled with the sensor. He couldn’t focus on what was needed. Pergus’s words kept drifting through his mind and with them, thoughts of his father. He was intrigued that he actually hadn’t heard anything of the rest of the fleet. Was he drowning it out or did it really not reach Relief?
Suddenly an image flashed into his mind, a tall, gaunt man. Lee’s face clenched at the unwanted memory. He hadn’t seen that face for so long. He’d barely seen it then. It had always been a hazy image, not like those of his attackers. His breathing came in pants and his heart raced in his chest. He frantically tried to control his fears. He had no idea where it had come from. His nightmares had moderated lately and had never attacked him in the daytime.
The tall, thin man had come aboard.
Lee’s stomach threatened to expel his lunch. He clutched at his midsection and dropped to the floor, utterly unable to stop the throes of panic that washed over him.
Zeus was on board Relief.
He lay on the floor and pulled himself into the fetal position, wrapping his arms tightly around his legs. He rocked back and forth, unable to find a shred of strength. He relived the whole experience. He once again felt every jolt of electricity, every blow of the pipe and the agony of the sheath of metal piercing the layers of his flesh. He imagined his father’s face, watching the process with interest.
He had no idea how long he laid there. When his mind was once again able to form a simple thought, he tried for several deep breaths. His body seemed willing to obey his command and he relaxed his hold enough to sit upright on the floor. Cautiously, he pulled up what he’d known about Zeus before he left Galactica. He’d been sentenced to life on the Astral Queen for treason. He vaguely remembered someone telling him that on a visit.
“Frak!” Despite his recent panic attack, Lee reprimanded himself for referring to his father. He shook his head, clearing his mind. He wondered if Tom Zarek himself had helped Zeus escape. Maybe Zeus hadn’t escaped? Perhaps he’d been released on some technicality. He wondered if anyone even knew he was loose in the fleet. He doubted the Commander would have left Zeus to his own devices. His thoughts were a jumble.
He grabbed the edge of the table and pulled himself to his feet. He stood clutching the edge of the table to assure his composure and straightened his back. His back was to the door. He tensed for a moment as he heard someone enter.
Before he turned, he started speaking in an attempt to cover his recent experience. “Zeus is on board. We’ve got to get word to the fleet and I need to get off this ship.” He whirled to see the response his words had brought and stared, numb.
** ~ **
She paced the deck. “What the frak is wrong CHIEF?”
Kara’s world had been turned upside down too often lately. The cylon attack had only been one incident to her. She’d gone AWOL, almost become a broodmare for her enemy, left a man she’s not sure if she loved and come back to now lose two men she knew she did love. She wasn’t happy. The only reason she hadn’t fraked it all and gone after Lee herself had been Roslin.
Kara had no idea that Roslin had just found out Adama was
resigning when she encountered her that day on the deck. The situation had been similar to today. Her viper wasn’t working.
“DAMN IT
The president stopped and the women met eyes. Kara rushed over to apologize. “I’m sorry about that, Madame President. I didn’t see you.”
Roslin smiled.
“That’s fine. I’ve longed to kick
something myself lately. Perhaps I
should try it.”
Kara blushed. “It
does help, but I’d wear different shoes.”
She pointed to the president’s tasteful pumps. “You’d break a toe with those.”
Roslin laughed.
“Thanks for the warning.” She
paused, scanning the deck. “Thank you.”
Kara didn’t understand.
“It’s not that big a deal.”
Roslin realized the daring pilot didn’t understand. “No, I mean, for your efforts here. We need you more than ever now.”
Kara growled. “I
need to be out looking for Lee. This is
stupid. If my ship was working, I’d be
gone.”
The president nervously scanned the deck again and pulled
Kara by the arm. They stopped near her
shuttle. “Lieutenant
“Frak!” Kara continued. “I mean I understand the old man’s desire,
but we need him here.”
“The commander feels differently of course. I’m just glad you’re here to assist the
Colonel. We need you.”
“Tigh hates me.”
“He needs you now.
He knows that.” The president
finally released Kara’s arm.
Kara had used the President’s faith to keep her going these days. Not a day went by that she didn’t want to take off after Lee. She knew she’d beat the snot out of him and drag his ass back on the ship where he belonged. She knew she’d be sure to leave his hands alone. He needed them to hold a pen to complete the immense stack of paperwork she was leaving for him. She envied the Commander and prayed daily for his success.