Chapter 1. Sweet Lily
Aoi's POV
Your cruel device
Your blood like ice
One look could kill
My pain, your thrill
Your eyes turn this way and that
while you are sleeping so soundly in
your bed. A bed I wish I could share
with you when you are awake. Now all
I can do is watch you. Sit here in
your chair and watch you. You will
not wake for another hour or so and
then I'll be gone, walking home to
my lonely apartment to get my stuff
and then head to practise like
always. I never dare to touch you
during the time with the others, but
some day I'll let you know. Some day
I will claim you as mine, and no one
will be able to take you away from
me, my love.
A strand of black hair is crossing
your face, making you look all the
more angelic. I carefully rise from
the chair when the need to feel
those silkes hairs run between my
fingers overpower me. I take out my
pocket knife and slowly cut that
strand, before binding the hairs
with a piece of string and putting
both the hairs and the knife back
into my pocket. You turn restlessly
in your sleep as I exit your
bedroom. The sun is slowly rising
over the city line as a new day is
dawning. I realise I'm late when I
hear your alarm clock just as I
reach the sidewalk outside the
apartment complex. I run back to my
place to fetch my guitar before
practise starts.
So many people are already about,
walking slowly or rushing through
the streets to get to their jobs.
Some are waiting at the bus stops,
reading or talking to each other.
Some are looking at their watches,
stepping around impatiently. No one
has the time to cherish the morning,
not even I. And still I somehow have
the time, while jogging home, to see
all these people around me. None of
them is as beautiful as you are of
course, but no one can be. How could
they be? You can't compete with the
beauty of an angel after all.
I slow down as I reach my apartment
complex and walk up the last steps
to my door. Luckily I'm situated on
the first floor, so I don't have to
climb stairs in order to get my
stuff. I sling the guitar bag onto
my back and head back out again,
much slower this time. As I walk the
short way to the studio I pick out
the hair dollie and slowly caress
the black hairs with my thumb.
Someone is standing outside the
studio watching the sunrise when I
arrive. Blond hair and the length of
the person gives him away as I get
closer. Ruki. Good thing it's not
Kai or he'll have my guts for
breakfast.
Speaking of the devil.
”Aoi!
You lazy son of a bitch! You know
how important today is and still
you're half an hour late!”
”I'm
sorry, Kai-kun. I got stuck watching
the beauty of the morning. It won't
happen again.”
”It
better not. Now hurry up and get
inside before the manager comes. You
did remember to bring your music
sheets, I hope.”
”Yup,
they're right here in my bag. No
worries.”
Kai just rolls his eyes and stomps
off into the studio. I see Ruki
trying to surpress a giggle as we
follow in our dear Leader-sama's
trail. Everyone is inside waiting,
even you. I guess just because I was
late it didn't mean that you would
be, now does it? I say hi to you
both as casual as I can before
bringing out my guitar and taking my
position. I can still see you in the
corner of my eye and this is how I
will watch you all day, undetected.
At 11 am we have lunch break. You
will be sitting with the rest of us,
like nothing's the matter, but one
day, my love, I'll make you love me
like I love you.
I want to love you, but I better
not touch
I want to hold you but my senses
tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too
much
It's a thrill to watch you eat, my
love. Those gorgeous lips opening up
to recieve the treats your lunch
consists of. How you slowly lick
your lips without realizing it. I
want to kiss those lips until
they're bruised and red. I wonder
how many lucky girls or guys have
been allowed to kiss those lips of
yours. As I think about anyone else
touching you like that my blood
starts to boil and heat rushes to my
cheeks.yone
in there? Hello?”
I'm startled out of my reverie by
Reita knocking my forehead.
”Huh?
What?”
”Ha,
he's back. Where were you spacing
off to, Aoi-kun? I bet it was
something good, considering how
flushed you are.”
”Not
every one has your perverted mind,
Reita-san. I...”
”Nu-uh,
don't try that with me. I know that
there's someone that makes your
heart skip a beat, someone with who
you'd love to realize all those
perverted fantasies of yours. Ain't
I right?”
I just glared at Reita as he got up
and started do a silly little dance.
Deep inside I was a little worried
by Reita's words. What if he knew?
Nee, he couldn't. I've been descrete
enough. It doesn't matter. Soon
we'll be together, my love. Soon,
very soon you will be mine.
After lunch we go back into the
studio, but not much is beeing done.
All of us just goof around in the
recording room and finally the
manager calls it off by telling
everyone to go home.
I watched you like I always do. Why
don't you see me? I'll make you
notice me, my love. Very, very soon.
I want to taste you but your lips
are venomous poison
You're poison runnin' thru my veins
You're poison, I don't want to break
these chains
The moon is slowly rising over the
roof tops. It's a wonder that the
lights of the city don't drown the
light of the moon as they have with
the stars. I turn around to watch
you, the moon light playing over
your body. I know I'm out of
pattern, I know it's dangerous. You
can wake up at any moment. Still I
can't leave you alone. I love you
too much to leave you be. Who will
protect you if not me? You belong to
me, my love. Only to me.
I bring out the hair dollie from my
pocket and caress it softly. I pick
up the white lily I left on the
table and put it on your bedside
table before leaving you to your
dreams. The world outside is never
totally silent and people were
making their way home from various
bars or public transportation
stations as I walked down the street
from your home. When I reach my
apartment I just shed my clothes as
I go before dropping into bed,
hoping for sleep to claim me, but
apparently sleep is somewhere else
and the thoughts of what Reita said
today occupies my mind as I lay in
the dark. Finally I give up trying
to sleep and just let my mind drift
to your lips and how they move when
you speak, when you eat, when you...
The shrill sound of the alarm clock
wakes me and I fall out of bed in
pure shock. So I did fall asleep. I
get dressed, get my stuff, and make
my way to the studio. Mind in a daze
and head full of dust I somehow
manage to get there without taking a
wrong turn on the way.
”I
still can't believe who could have
done this. It's really scary.” I can
hear your voice through an open
window and you seem worried. All
thoughts of how lousily this morning
begun vanish as all I can think of
is why you are in such anguish.
”What's
wrong, Uruha-san?”
”Oh
hi, Aoi-kun. Nothing really. When I
woke up this morning this was lying
on my bedside table.”
You hold out the lily I gave you
last night. Why did you bring it
here, my love? Didn't you like it?
Of course, you should love it. It
was a gift. A gift from me. You
should love it.
”You
probably just forgot you bought it,
Uru-kun.”
”No,
Reita. Why wold I buy funeral
flowers when I'm not going to a
funeral?”
”I
like lilies.” I can't help to say,
while my blood is boiling with anger
and disappointment. Why didn't you
like it? It was for you. And why did
you have to bring it here? Treat it
like it's meaningless?
”Oh
good for you, Aoi. I don't,
especially when they just show up
next to my bed. Someone's been into
my apartment while I was sleeping,
you get that?”
Your mouth, so hot
Your web, I'm caught
Your skin, so wet
Black lace on sweat
My anger runs like black poison
through my veins as I make my way
home. Why did you have to speak so
evilly about the beautiful flower? I
gave it to you. You should love it.
You don't seem to get it, my love.
When I give things to you, you
should love them. Love them like I
love you. I guess you have to learn
that, my love.
You belong to me and no other. Only
to me, my love. And you don't talk
evilly about gifts from me. Never.
I guess some lessons in manner are
in place. You should always take
good care of gifts. Love gifts. Love
me.
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chapter 2
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