- Joke For March 2001 -

CITY OF LOS ANGELES

 High School Math Proficiency Exam

 Name...................... Gang...................

 1. Johnny has a AK47 with an 80 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive-by shooting, how many drive by shootings can he attempt before he can reload?

 2. Jose has 2 ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8 ball to Otis for $820 and 2 grams to Billy for $85 per gram. What is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?

 3. Rufus is pimping for 3 girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his $800 per day crack habit?

 4. Jerome wants to cut his 1/2 pound of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need?

 5. Willie gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy and $100 for a 4 4. If he has stolen 2 BMW's and 3 4 4's, how many Chevy's will he have to steal to make $800?

 6. Raoul is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his common law wife is spending $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out of prison and how many years will he get for killing that bitch that spent his money?

 7. If an average spray can covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can a tagger spray with 3 cans of paint?

 8. Hector knocked up 6 girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in his gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Hector knocked up?

 9. During the riots, Carlos stole 3 television sets per hour. How many could he have stolen in 2 hours with the help of his homeboy's junior and pape?

 10. While carjacking a Mercedes, the Crip's gun jams. The victim reaches toward the glove box where he keeps a .357 magnum. If it takes the Crip 3.5 seconds to un-jam his weapon and 1.79 seconds to aim and shoot, while it takes the victim a total of 4.27 seconds to retrieve his .357 and shoot. Who will end up drawn in chalk?

 EXTRA CREDIT QUESTION:

 11. Paco is holding up a liquor store when a clerk trips the silent alarm. 5-0's response time from Dunkin Donuts is 1.5 minutes. It takes Paco 30 seconds to empty the cash register and shoot the clerk, 20 seconds to grab a couple of forty'ls of Bud. How much time does Paco have to flee?

Author: Vulcan MG.  Email: vulcanmg@yahoo.com.au