She sighed as she observed the road signs. They were well out of Port Charles, and they were entering some of the more rural communities. Then she realized that while they had been driving for half an hour, she had not heard a word from Sly.
She quickly glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. He was blankly staring out the window, and he was shaking slightly. She reached on the seat. "Sly, you're shivering. Why don't you put on your coat?"
He took the coat and put it on, but the shaking did not cease.
Emily noted this, but said nothing about it. Instead, she tried to draw him out. "At least it's over with. Now everyone knows." She winced. "Except Juan." Sly was quiet. "And I'm sure you'll want to tell Lucky."
She could see Sly's hand tighten into a fist, and a flash of pain crossed his face. Still, there was silence.
"You know you can talk to me, Sly. I won't hurt you, I promise." Nothing. Finally, out of desperation, Emily turned on the radio. There was a healing aspect of music that affected Sly. Maybe it would help now. She pressed scan on the radio until she found a country station. Sly continued to stare out the window as a song started.
Oh, the trouble with the truth
Is it's always the same ol' thing
So hard to forget, so impossible for me to change
Every time I try to fight it
I know I'll be left to blame
Oh, the trouble with the truth
Is it's always the same ol' thing
*-*-*-*-*-*
And the trouble with the truth
Is it's just what I need to hear
Ringing so right, deep down inside my ear
And it's everything I want
And it's everything I fear
Oh, the trouble with the truth
Is it's just what I need to hear
"Come on, Kevin. I just can't believe what you're saying. I know what I remember!" Lucky sighed angrily.
"But that's my theory, Lucky. The memories, they aren't real."
"I just don't understand it," Lucky said, crossing his arms over his chest.
Kevin sat in a chair beside the bed. "Then let me explain again. It appears that you've been through a system of mind control."
"You mean like brainwashing?"
Kevin nodded. "That's the old term for it, yes."
Lucky's face gave away his confusion. "How would someone do that?"
"Well, there are several ways to go about it. It could be done through hypnosis, drugs, or even torture," Kevin said softly, watching Lucky's reaction.
Lucky squeezed his eyes shut and leaned back against the pillow. He said nothing.
"Now, Lucky, you've told me about times when you were thrown in a dark room for hours on end, never being allowed to go outdoors, to exercise. That sounds a lot like torture to me." Lucky was silent. Kevin hoped he was not shutting down on him. "But there's more, isn't there?" Come on, Lucky, don't give up now, Kevin thought.
"Of course there's more!" Lucky opened his eyes. "They would tie me up. I, I couldn't move." Lucky was gripping the rails of the bed so hard that his hands were turning white. "They would make me watch things. I couldn't move my head, I couldn't close my eyes." Lucky's breathing was rapid, almost as if he was reliving the memory.
"What did they make you watch?" Kevin was intrigued by this latest development.
"That's just it- I don't remember. There's so much I don't remember." Lucky sighed.
"Then we'll work at it, Lucky, until you do remember."
Lucky shook his head. "I know what I do remember. I hurt Elizabeth, and I'll never be able to forgive myself."
Kevin looked Lucky in the eyes. "If you did, then why would Elizabeth want to even be near you? Why is she so worried about you now?"
"Because she blocked it out, just like I did!" Lucky averted his eyes from Kevin's.
"Lucky, I've been a psychiatrist for many years now. I would be able to tell if that was the case. It's not. She told me you never hurt her."
"I just don't know," Lucky said tearfully.
"Lucky, this kind of mind control is difficult to get over, but you can do it. Just believe in yourself."
Lucky wouldn't look at him. Kevin knew that it had been a rough night for Lucky. It was pointless to push now.
"Lucky, why don't we continue this tomorrow?"
"You're not going to put me back in the room, are you?"
Kevin sighed. "No. You can stay in here tonight. I'll have the nurse come in to give you a sedative."
Lucky closed his eyes. "Fine." He was eager to retreat into the relative safety of slumber. True, there were nightmares, but they were better than the hell his real life was.
Kevin slowly walked out of the room, taking one last look at Lucky on the bed. He was determined to help Lucky. Now that he had a better idea about what was causing Lucky's behavior, it would be easier to try to reach him.
Kevin hated to admit it to himself, but he saw a little of Ryan in every patient. Every time he helped someone to overcome their problems, to conquer their demons, it was a chance at redemption. Maybe Ryan didn't have that chance, but he was sure that Lucky was different. Kevin hoped Lucky could live up to his name.
*-*-*-*-*-*
It has ruined the taste of the sweetest lies
Burned through my best alibis
Every sin that I deny
Keeps hanging 'round my door
Oh, the trouble with the truth
Is it always begs for more
That's the trouble, the trouble with the truth
"How could we let them get away?" Edward said with exasperation in his voice.
"What, were we supposed to run after the car?" Monica said crossly.
"Then let me call the police. They'll pull them over." Edward moved to the phone.
"No, Grandfather, don't do that," Ned said as he and AJ walked back into the room.
"And what do you suggest we do?" Edward asked.
"I say let them go," AJ said.
"Oh, like I would take advice from a drunk," Edward snapped.
"Let them go, Edward," Monica said with a final tone in her voice. "They'll be alright."
"How do you know that, Monica? We don't know what this, this hooligan is like!"
"Now, Grandfather, I spent a lot of time with Sly when I was with Jenny. He's a good kid," Ned said.
"And that was how many years ago?" Edward paced a bit. "We don't know how he turned out, especially with that Bill Eckert as a father. He was always strange."
"I don't know, Grandfather, sometimes the best kids have the worst parents," AJ commented.
"What right do you have to comment? Need I remind you, Junior, that you slept with that boy's mother, and that you were a suspect in her murder?" Ned said. AJ was silent.
Edward looked at Alan, who was quietly sitting on the couch. "Why aren't you saying anything, Alan?"
Alan looked straight ahead. "I didn't mean to do that. I just wanted to scare him, but I think it was more than that."
Monica sat beside Alan, and took his hand. "Of course, dear. You wouldn't deliberately hurt him."
"There was something about the look he gave me. It was pure terror."
Monica was silent for a moment. "We're going to be grandparents again."
Edward snorted. "Maybe we'll be able to see this one."
Monica threw one of the couch pillows at him.
*-*-*-*-*-*
And the trouble with the truth
Is it just won't let me rest
Emily could see Sly mouthing the words to the song. She thought it might be a good idea to stop for a while, so she pulled off the nearest exit. She heard Sly softly start to sing.
I run and hide but there's always another test
And I know that it won't let me be
'Til I've given it my best
The trouble with the truth
Is it just won't let me rest
His voice got louder and more strained.
That's the trouble, the trouble with the truth
That's the trouble, the trouble with the truth
Emily saw that he was shaking even more. She had to do something. She pulled over to the side of the rural road and turned off the car. She put her hands on Sly's arms. "Sly, Sly, talk to me, please! You're scaring me."
Sly closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the seat. "I don't mean to do that. I swore to God that I wouldn't let it happen. Never again."
"What, Sly?" Emily slid across the seat to be closer to him.
"I swore I wouldn't let him get to me. But he's doing it, even from beyond the grave." He pounded his fist on the door. "He's dead. He's not supposed to hurt me anymore."
Emily looked at Sly sympathetically. "This is about before. When my dad slammed you against the wall."
"You could tell?" Sly asked softly.
Emily looked down. "I think any one could, Sly. You looked like you were afraid he would kill you."
"Maybe he could have after the news we just gave him," Sly said with a sigh.
"It was more than that, though. I could tell that you really weren't thinking about my father at all." She looked him in the eyes. "It was your grandfather, wasn't it?"
Sly put a hand to his forehead. "It's always him. It's like I'm doing fine, but then something happens, and those memories just rush to the surface."
"Sly, nobody expects you to forget," Emily said softly.
"I don't expect to forget, either. There's no possible way. What I have a problem with is how much the memories affect me. They throw me so hard. It's not just like I'm remembering what happened, it's like I'm back there." Sly rested his hands on his knees. "It's so hard to explain. Look at me, Emily. I'm shaking, and I can't stop. It's because for a split second, it felt like it was happening all over again. It's so real. I can see him, I can hear what he's saying, and I can feel the pain." He took a shaky breath. "And I just feel so helpless. I couldn't stop it before, and for some reason, I can't stop it now."
Emily didn't know what to say, so she embraced Sly. She could feel him shake against her. She gently moved so that she was in back of him. She wrapped her arms around him. "You're not helpless. You've got me now."
Sly closed his eyes as he laid his head on one of Emily's shoulders. He could feel the steady rhythm of her heart. This is what he had wanted for so long, for someone to just hold him and make him feel better. As he lay there trembling in her arms, he realized that this was his family now. They had nothing but each other. Somehow, that was enough.
Song Credit: "The Trouble With the Truth" by Gary Nicholson. Sung by Patty Loveless on her album "The Trouble With the Truth."