Emily smiled at the Wyndham's sales clerk. "I appreciate that."
The clerk looked through a large catalogue, and then disappeared into the back room. "I'll bring out a few that fit your tastes."
Emily turned to Elizabeth and sighed. "I'd love to see what she thinks is my taste."
Elizabeth smiled. "Well, she's a professional. Hopefully she won't pick out something too horrendous."
Emily looked down at her stomach and sighed. "Come on, Elizabeth. I'm sure there aren't too many maternity wedding gowns." She moved to one of the mirrors and looked at her reflection. "I'm going to look like a big white whale walking down the aisle."
"Baby beluga," Elizabeth sang.
Emily turned around. "Be quiet," she laughed.
"Sorry," Elizabeth grinned. "But seriously, Emily, I'm sure you'll look great. And who says you have to wear white?"
"True," Emily noted. She looked at her best friend. "You know, you're in a great mood. What's up?"
Elizabeth smiled again. "I got a letter from Lucky," she whispered.
"Really?" Emily said. She hadn't seen him since the day they were stuck in the elevator.
"It was really a surprise," Elizabeth said. "I found it when I went in my room at Kelly's."
*-*-*-*-*-*
February 14, 2001
Elizabeth sighed as she opened the door to her room. She had spent a lot of time at her studio, trying to paint, but nothing was coming out right. Then she worked a long shift at Kelly's. Now all she wanted to do was go to bed and forget about everything.
It was Valentine's Day, and it brought back painful memories of her rape. She wished that she could be with Lucky. When she thought he was dead, the day was so painful. Now he was alive, but she still couldn't be with him. It wasn't fair.
She turned on the lights in the dark room, and gasped at what she saw inside. There was a bouquet of white roses on the dresser, with a note that read, "Elizabeth."
Elizabeth eagerly opened the note. She recognized the handwriting immediately.
Dear Elizabeth,
I'm so sorry that I couldn't be here for you today. I know just how hard this day is for you, and it kills me that you're alone now. It's all my fault, and I'm sorry.
I know I owe you an explanation for my strange behavior. Unfortunately, I'm still trying to find one myself. What I do know is that a lot of things happened to me during my captivity. Kevin thinks I was brainwashed. I'm not totally sure how it all works, but I guess it would explain a lot of things.
The one thing I do know is that I never hurt you. I doubted it before, but I know for sure now. In some ways, my life is a lot better, but I'm still missing a big piece of it, and that's you.
It's so hard to be apart from you, but I think it's necessary for now. I've just got to get my head straight first. I hope that you'll understand this. I love you with all my heart.
The vows go unbroken,
Lucky
*-*-*-*-*-*
"Wow," Emily said as she observed the hopeful look in Elizabeth's eyes. She hadn't seen that in a long time.
Elizabeth nodded. She played with a silver ring on her right hand. "And I can understand why he wants his space right now. Lucky was so gentle and patient with me, and I want to return the favor."
Emily smiled. She was glad that Lucky was making progress. She never mentioned getting stuck in the elevator with Lucky to Elizabeth. It just wasn't her story to tell.
Just then, the clerk returned, and she brought in several wedding dresses. "Ok, Ms. Quartermaine, are you ready?"
Emily looked at the yards of white tulle in the saleswoman's arms and sighed. "Ready."
*-*-*-*-*-*
Nikolas sat at a table at Kelly's and poked at his piece of peach pie. "I didn't know you practiced a martial art."
Livvie smiled. "I have a brown belt in karate."
"My uncle taught me Tai-Chi. It really taught me to focus my mind, to block out all distractions," he said almost wistfully.
Livvie nodded. "It's terrific discipline, both mental and physical." She looked at him sympathetically. "You miss him, don't you?"
Nikolas was pulled from his memory. "What?"
Livvie played with a spoon on her coffee saucer. "You miss your uncle. I can see it every time you mention him."
If she only knew, he thought. I'm being so hypocritical. I was mad when she lied to me, and now I'm doing the same to her, to everyone.
"It's okay, you know. I still miss my mom," she said with a guarded vulnerability.
Nikolas reached across the table and took her hand. "I know, and I appreciate the support. I'm just not ready to talk about it yet," he said softly.
"Well, when you are, you know where to find me," she smiled. Her eye caught a glimpse of the clock on the wall, and she gasped. "Oh no, if I don't leave right now, I'll be late to Calculus class, and the professor's such a jerk."
"Well, go then." He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss.
She kissed him back, and then rose from the table. She put down money for her share of the bill, and then she dashed out the door. "No arguments!" she called.
Nikolas reluctantly scooped up the money. He always tried to pay the bill, but Livvie insisted that she would pay for herself. He left a tip for the waitress, and gave the money and the bill to the person working the counter.
He walked outside into the cold February air and pulled his jacket tighter against the chill. Just then, a very formally dressed man approached. "Nikolas Cassadine?" he asked.
Nikolas nodded. "Yes."
The man handed him a small white envelope. "I have an important message from the Quartermaine family."
Nikolas took the envelope, and the man walked away. He turned the paper over in his hands. "Nikolas Cassadine and Guest" was written in calligraphy on the front. What could the Quartermaines want that was so important it had to be hand delivered? He opened the envelope and began to read.
Dr. And Dr. Alan Quartermaine request the honor of your presence at the Wedding Ceremony at which their daughter
Emily Marie
And
Mr. Sylvester Andrew Eckert
Will be united in the Sacrament of Marriage on the sixteenth of March, at 6 o'clock in the evening at Holy Name of Jesus Roman Catholic Church, Port Charles, New York.
Nikolas looked over the rest of the information included with the invitation. The reception would be held in the Versailles room of the Port Charles Hotel, the same place where the Nurses Ball took place. From the wording of it, it sounded like the wedding would be one of Port Charles' biggest functions. Nikolas sighed. Even when their granddaughter was walking down the aisle six months pregnant, the Quartermaines were determined to have a formal, grand event. Then a thought occurred to him. He took out his cell phone and dialed a number. He waited for the recording and the beep. "We may have an opening," he said in his best Russian, then hung up the phone.
*-*-*-*-*-*
"And this dress has a hidden panel in the waist that can be extended if necessary."
"I've only got three weeks until the wedding," Emily sighed as she looked at herself in the dress. Yards and yards of white satin billowed around her, and Emily thought it appeared as if the dress was swallowing her.
"Now for the matching veil," the saleswoman said as she put it on Emily's head.
Emily took in her full reflection, and she hated it. The dress was too frilly, too big, too everything. It made her look like she was trying to be a confident, radiant woman when inside, she still felt like a scared kid. A wave of emotions suddenly hit her, and she started to cry.
"Emily, what's wrong?" Elizabeth asked, immediately concerned.
"I hate this!" she cried. "I hate this dress, I hate this big wedding, I hate everything!"
Elizabeth turned to the saleswoman. "Could you give us a moment please?"
"Of course," the woman said as she slipped into the back room.
Emily sank to the ground, surrounded by yards of the white satin. She cried frightened tears into her hands.
Elizabeth sat next to Emily. She did not say anything; she just let her cry for a while.
Finally, Emily spoke. "I'm so stupid for getting upset like this."
"Hey, you can't help but feeling what you feel," Elizabeth said supportively.
Emily played with one of the sequins on the dress and sighed. "But this is what I want, isn't it? I was the one who proposed, who suggested this whole thing. Now as it gets closer, I just feel worse and worse." She took a shaky breath. "All I can think about is how this wasn't supposed to happen. And I just want my mother," she sobbed.
Elizabeth gave Emily a gentle hug. "Oh honey, I'm sorry."
"You know, we talked about my wedding. We talked about everything," Emily sniffled.
*-*-*-*-*-*
November 1993
Emily sat staring out the window of her room when she heard a soft knock on the door.
"Em, honey, can I come in?"
Emily turned towards the door. "Sure, Mom," she called.
Page stepped into the room, and joined Emily on the bed. She had just taken a shower, and Emily could smell the sweet scent of the citrus soap her mother used. Page had a towel wrapped around her head.
"You've been awfully quiet today, Emily."
Emily stared at the light blue comforter on her bed. "Sometimes I don't feel like talking."
Page nodded. "You're absolutely right. Sometimes it's ok just to keep your thoughts to yourself." She touched Emily's shoulder. "But I'm concerned, Emily, because you've been doing it more and more lately. I want you to know that you can say anything to me."
Emily sighed. She looked at her mother. "Are you going to die, Mom?"
A few different emotions crossed Page's face. "I don't know, Emily," she said finally.
Emily drew in a sharp breath. She always knew the answer in the back of her mind, but to hear it out loud was something else.
"You know that I would never try to hide the truth from you, Emily. I've always been honest with you about my illness. It's an aggressive cancer, but we're doing the best we can. I've started chemo, and then I'll have radiation. I'm a fighter, Emily, and I don't intend on going anywhere anytime soon."
Emily's eyes filled up with tears. "I know Mom, but I just keep thinking about the bad things. What if you do die? What will happen to me then? You won't be here anymore. You won't see me graduate, get married…"
Page gave Emily a gentle hug. "Oh Em." She moved a piece of hair out of Emily's eyes. "You know as well as I do that I can't make any promises about the future. But you listen to me. No matter what you're doing, no matter where you go, I will always be with you. I'll be right there in your heart whenever you need me."
Emily smiled a little at the thought.
Page smiled as well. "But aren't you a little young to be thinking about getting married? Unless there's a special guy I don't know about," she teased.
Emily blushed. "No. I was just thinking about it, that's all."
"I know your wedding day will be one of the happiest days of your life, Emily. You'll be such a beautiful bride." She played with Emily's brown hair. "Maybe we'll put flowers in your hair." She smiled wistfully again. "And you'll find that special man who will make you happy, just like your dad did for me."
Emily always noticed the way her mother's eyes softened at the mention of her father.
"You'll make him happy, too, and you'll learn what true love is. It's about putting someone else's needs, their happiness, before your own, and it doesn't drain you. Instead, you're given twice as much as you gave."
Emily nodded. "Thanks, Mom."
Page got up from the bed. "Anytime, kiddo." She reached up and touched the towel on her head. "Oh, there's something I wanted to show you."
Emily looked up as her mother took the towel off her head. She was bald.
Page ran a hand over her head. "I finally decided to shave it all off. It was better than having it falling out everywhere."
Emily stared at her mother. Maybe before she could deny it, but now, her mother truly looked sick. She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Yeah. Now your wig will fit better."
Page patted Emily on the back before she walked to the door. "I've got to get ready for work now, but you've got a little while before you go to the babysitter's. Why don't you relax until then?" Page smiled at Emily as she slipped out the door.
Emily finally let the tears fall down her cheeks after the door closed. She cried into her pillow at the injustice, the unfairness of it all. "I don't want her to die, God. Please don't let her die."
*-*-*-*-*-*
Elizabeth was crying by this time, too.
"I know I should remember that she's always with me, but I just really need her right now," Emily said softly.
"No arguing with that," Elizabeth said, thinking of the times she needed her own mother but only found her absent.
Emily looked at herself in the mirror, and she thought she looked like a big, white cream puff. "Well, one thing I know is that she would hate this dress, too," she laughed.
Elizabeth smiled. "I'm not sure you're going to find what you're looking for here."
Emily nodded. "Me neither." She looked at Elizabeth with worry. "But I've got to find something to waddle down the aisle in soon. I need to find the perfect dress."
"And I've got three weeks to do it."
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