She just looked at him, curious, even though she was hurt; Amanda knew that he was trying to apologize and from the looks of it, explain a lot of things. Amanda settled down on the couch and crossed her arms, waiting.

Lee looked at her for a moment, she wasn’t going to make this easy for him. For that he was thankful, something special, wasn’t supposed to come easy.

“Amanda..” He paused looked at her and started to pace, “Okay, I’ll start from the beginning. When I first started off with the Agency, I was partnered with Erik McCaffrey. He taught me the ropes basically, we became friends and worked well together.” He stopped for a moment and sat down next to Amanda.

Amanda just looked at him with somber eyes, she knew that this was hard for him to talk about, it was very apparent that she was the only person who had heard this before.

“See this is why I am so reluctant Amanda. I don’t want what happened to him to happen to you.”

“Why Lee? What happened?” Amanda spoke for the first time since this all started.

He looked at her, at that very moment, showing all the love, the commitment, and respect that he held for Amanda, through his eyes.

With a heavy sigh he looked over at her and gently squeezed her hands, then got up and walked over to the window, letting the cool air illuminate him. Lee bowed his head in resignation; he had to get this off his chest, to share this burden with someone.

“I know this is hard Lee, I am here for you, I want to share this with you.” Amanda said softly, she wasn’t even sure if he had heard her.

“I know you are, through everything, you are always here for me.” Lee smiled at her reflection in the window, he looked down at his hands and started again, “It was six years, Sunday, that Erik was killed.” He said finally, tears threatening.

“Oh Lee..” Amanda began as she got up and went to him and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into an embrace. Suddenly everything that happened over the past week, didn’t seem to match what was going on inside of Lee.

He smiled a weak smile and held on to her for support. “He was killed in the line of duty. I couldn’t get to him in time, and he was shot. Shot because of me.”

Amanda looked up at him and smoothed away a few stray hairs that found their way to his face. She cupped his cheek and leaned up to gently kiss him.

They stood there for a long time before either one of them moved, not wanting to disrupt the calmness that had taken over.

Lee was the first to speak. “I am really sorry about how I acted, that I took everything out on you. I just can’t lose you, and I thought that if I pushed you away enough, you would leave, and I wouldn’t have to worry about anything ever happening to you.” He paused and rested his forehead against hers, “But I was very wrong.”

“I love you” Amanda told him as she moved to kiss him gently.

Letting those three words register in his brain, Lee reacted to the kiss Amanda had given him. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. As he gently rubbed one of his hands up and down her back, he tilted his head, moved it closer and laid his lips across hers.

Amanda was more then expecting a kiss. She was waiting for him to react to her. And when he did, she was ready. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she ran one through his hair. But as she felt Lee deepen the kiss, she used his neck to hold on to him.

Feeling Amanda hold onto him a little tighter, Lee decided that to really apologize to her, he'd show her how much she meant to him. Not exactly ending the kiss, Lee moved his lips off hers and down her jaw line. Stopping just below her ear, he listened as she moaned in protest that he had moved his lips away from her's. But his next action, which consisted of him nibbling on her ear, produced moans of pleasure from her. He smiled to himself as he moved down and away from her ear to the nape of her neck.

Her knees were getting worse. She didn't even know how she could stand up anymore. It had been a long time since her and Lee had been this close. Although, she didn't care, it just felt so incredible. She wanted more. She wanted to feel him all over her body.

Stopping at the collar to her sweater, Lee pulled back and looked up at Amanda. He could see she was enjoying every inch of what he was doing. "Amanda."

Opening her eyes, she had closed then when he started to nibble her ear, Amanda looked into his eyes. "Yes Lee."

"You want this, right?"

"Of course, I do."

"Good," Lee replied as he took his arms off from around her and gently placed them on her hands that were around his neck. Pulling them off, he surprised her with his next move.

"Lee..."

"Bedroom?"

"I've always wanted to make love in front of a roaring fire," Amanda admitted.

"We have the rest of our lives to do that," Lee told her as he walked to the stairs leading to the upstairs. Setting her down, Lee took hold of her hand and led her up the stairs.

Following him, course she had no choice he had her hand, Amanda couldn't wait for what was going to happen. They had, had a rough week (?). This was exactly what they needed and what they both wanted. Feeling a hand on her cheek, Amanda came out of her thoughts to see Lee standing before her. "Yes."

"You okay?" Lee asked.

"Sorry was caught up in my thoughts."

“Can I tell you something?” Lee asked her. Amanda nodded and he continued “When all of this began and you left, I couldn’t find you, it was like nothing else mattered, all I wanted to do was see you, to make things right. All I wanted to do was to spend time with you, to be able just to stand next to you. I know it sounds strange, but in a way I think that what we have, our relationship, both work and personal, it keeps pulling me closer. I couldn't break free from it if I wanted to, and I don't want to. I love the way I feel when I'm around you and the way you make me feel. I feel complete or whole when you're with me. I'm a better man.”

"You really want this, don't you?"

"Oh ya, I've wanted you for awhile," Amanda admitted as Lee wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

"Good," Lee said as he captured her lips with his.

Instead of wrapping her arms around his neck, Amanda slid her hands under his jacket. 'He was way over dressed,' she thought to herself as Lee deepened the kiss.

Feeling Amanda snake her hands under his jacket, Lee let his arms drop but never broke the kiss. Taking his jacket off didn't mean for them to break the kiss. When he felt Amanda slid the jacket off, he moved both hands to her face and cupped it. Pulling back, he looked into her eyes. "I love you, Amanda."

"Love you too, Lee," Amanda replied as she took Lee's hands off her face. Holding onto his hands, she leaned in and kissed him. In some aspect, she was continuing on with the kiss he had broken. She hadn't wanted the kiss to end, she wanted it to continue.

When Amanda finally did let go off his hands, Lee moved them to the bottom of her sweater. Pushing the sweater up, he than ran his hands underneath.

Feeling Lee's hand on her stomach, Amanda shivered. His hands weren't cold, but it was the way he touched her. It was almost as if she could feel him wanting her through the way he ran his hands over her stomach and onto her back.

As the kiss ended, Lee pushed Amanda's sweater up. When she looked into his eyes, he spoke softly to her. "We have to many clothes on."

"Oh ya, I agree," Amanda said as she let Lee pull her sweater off. Watching him toss it over his shoulder, she spoke when she saw a different look in his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"You are beautiful," Lee replied as he leaned towards her and gave her a kiss. "Extremely beautiful."

Smiling, Amanda felt a few tears run down her cheeks. No one, since her ex had told her that.

Seeing the tears, Lee placed a hand on her cheek. As he wiped away her tears, he spoke. "Don't cry."

"It's not that, Lee."

"What is it?"

"I haven't heard anyone tell me I'm beautiful in a very long time," Amanda explained.

"Well you are," Lee replied as he leaned in and kissed her. "Extremely."

Smiling at him, Amanda decided that Lee was now wearing to many clothes. Reaching out she pulled his jean shirt out of his jeans and started on the buttons. But before she was half way done, she was interrupted. "Oh Lee."

Lee had brushed away some hair on her neck and was now busy kissing the exposed areas. His real plan was to distract Amanda from undoing his shirt and he knew it was working. When she dropped her arms, he moved his lips down her collarbone to the front of her chest. Laying a trail of kisses, he stopped when he got to her bra. Jumping over the front of it, he bent down as he lowered the kisses.

Amanda's only response was to run her hands through his hair. That's all she could think of doing.

Stopping at her waistband of her pants, Lee undid the buttons but as he started to push them down, a pair of hands pulling him back up interrupted him.

When Lee was at her level again, Amanda kissed him before he could protest. Yes, she wanted to feel him everywhere on her body, but she also wanted to feel her hands on him, too. Placing her hands on his shirt, she undid the rest of the buttons. When his shirt was open, she slid her hands underneath and pushed it off. As the shirt fell to the floor, she ran her hands up and down his chest. Breaking the kiss, the one she had started, she leaned towards him and placed her lips on his now exposed chest. Starting from his Adam's apple, she laid a trail of kisses down to his pants.

Lee was in heaven. That's all he could think of. Here he was in a room with the woman he loved. But when he felt her undo the button on his pants, he reacted; he came out of his thoughts. Pulling her up, he then picked her up. He gave her no chance to protest. Walking to the semi made bed, he gently placed her on it and lay down on top of her.

The next morning sun came through the bedroom windows, cascading over the couple laying in the bed together. Lee wasn’t sure if this was still a dream or not, he gently moved his hand over Amanda’s bare back and up her arm. He let out a sigh of contentment and closed his eyes again.

A few moments later Amanda moaned in her sleep, she felt warm all over. Amanda smiled as the memories came floating back into her consciousness.

She looked up at Lee, he was still asleep, for as far as she would know. Amanda reached up and moved her finger gently down the line of his jaw; she then reached up and kissed him gently. She then settled back to look at him.

“Morning” Lee said to her as he opened his eyes.

“Hi” Amanda responded as she smiled and laid her head down on his chest.

They sit there in a comfortable silence, Lee rubbing her back and Amanda promptly drifted off into a morning nap. He leaned over and gave her a kiss on her hairline and gently tried to wake her, he had other things in mind for that morning.

“I love you.” Lee whispered into her ear, his breath flowing over her ear sending chills over Amanda’s and she snuggled in closer to him, if it was at all possible.

“Mmm” Amanda moved a bit, “that feels good.” She admitted.

“Yeah, and how about this?” Lee whispered as he wrapped his arms around her tighter and puller her up and kissed her passionately.

After a few moments they broke apart and looked right into each other’s souls, both of them smiled and leaned in for another kiss, reliving what happened the night before.

Around noon, Lee and Amanda wandered out of bed and sat in the kitchen table together drinking coffee. They sat on the bench to the table together, Lee was against the corner with his leg up on the bench, Amanda had nestled herself in between him and the table.

“You know Amanda,” Lee paused as he looked down and interlaced his fingers with hers, “I could really get used to this.” He brought her hand up and gently laid a kiss on it, “I love you, Amanda.”

The rest of the day went just as the morning had gone; they relaxed and spent the day in each other’s arms. It was a day that neither one would forget, it was the beginning, the foundation for their relationship that was ready to advance to the next level.

Later that evening they were settled on a blanket in the back by the pond. They were having a picnic and planned on watching the sunset together. Lee fell into a silence for the first time today. He let his mind drift to what the following day meant to him.

“Hey, are you okay?” Amanda asked quietly ad she turned around in his embrace to look at him.

Lee looked down at her in his arms and tightened his hold on her, “Did I tell you how much I love you?”

“Not this afternoon yet.” She smiled trying to lighten the mood, “What are you thinking about?” She asked turning serious.

“Tomorrow, I want to go to Erik’s…” He trailed off, but she knew exactly what he was talking about.

“Okay, I will take you.” Amanda responded as she held on to him, letting him know that she was there for him, that she was never going to leave.

“Can you..can you go with me?” Lee asked her after a few moments of silence, “I’d really need you..”

“Of course I will, I wouldn’t be anywhere else.” Amanda told him as she knelt between his legs and leaned in to kiss him.

“I love you Amanda King…” He began to tell her before they were engulfed in a passionate kiss.

Lee opened his eyes for a second, “Hey we are missing the sunset…”

“No I am not missing anything.” Amanda responded and leaned in again as Lee pulled her down on top of him.

The next day turned out to be a cloudy day. They woke up after a long night of making love and talking, tangled in the sheets and cuddled up next to one another, holding on like they would lose each other if they let go.

“We should really get up.” Amanda began to say to him, as he drew lazy circles on her back.

“Yeah” we all Lee said as he reached down and puller Amanda up to kiss her.

“If you keep doing that we are never going to make it out of this bed.” Amada joked.

“And that is such a bad thing?”

“Lee”

“I know, I just feel like if I let you go, I’ll..” Lee started to tell her as he started to get all teary eyed at the thought.

Amanda leaned up a rested her chin on her hands as she looked at him, “What Lee? What is it?”

“Lose you Amanda, I can’t lose you.”

“I can’t lose you either, I love you so much.” She said to him as she ran a finger down his jaw line and kissed him.

Amanda drove to the cemetery that afternoon. Lee had gone into a quite state and asked her to drive. She pulled into the cemetery and shut the car off, as she got out and walked over to the passenger side of the car, she noticed that Lee had not gotten out. He just sat there with a face that showed so many emotions. Feelings that he needed his privacy and to take his time, Amanda leaned against the side of the car and waited. A few moments later lee opened the door and slowly got out and looked around, it was a cloudy and empty day, and it suited his mood. His gaze turned to Amanda who was looking at him, she didn’t make a move. Amanda was unsure about how to handle this situation, she wanted to go to him, to hold him, but she also knew there was something that Lee needed to on his own.

Lee began to move, he took a few steps and realized that she was not following him, so Lee turned around to find her still in the same spot, leaning against his car.

“Hey..” Lee began to say as he moved back towards her, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing” She said as her eyes filled with tears.

“This is not nothing, Amanda.” Lee stated flatly.

“I was just thinking that this might be you or me one day.” She said sadly.

“I know.” He said and pulled her in for a hug. They both stood there for a long time, just holding each other, knowing that the other was there, that they loved each other. In the long run, that was what was going to help them through this. “I am sorry.” Lee finished.

Amanda looked up at him, eyes blurred, “Why? Why would you say that?”

“I think you know what I mean, Amanda, and I just wanted to say that I was sorry.”

“There is no need, I know what I was getting into, Lee, and this is not the time or place to discuss this.” She said as she reached for his hand and took a step away.

“Yeah, come on.”

They both walked towards Erik’s grave together. Lee was sure about he would feel about being here, and with Amanda none the less.

Amanda bent down and put flowers on his grave. Lee smiled and held her a little tighter. They both lost track of time, and Amanda turned to Lee who had been silent for a while.

“Hey” She began as she put her hands on his collar and moved them down his chest, “Are you ready?”

Lee looked up at her and smiled, then leaned in to give her a gentle kiss, “Yeah I am ready, come on.” He finished as he reached for her hands.

When they reached the car lee opened the passenger door for Amanda but stopped her from getting in. “I just wanted to say thanks Amanda, for everything. You have no idea how much this, you mean to me.” He said as he cupped her face and leaned in for a lingering kiss.

Later that night Lee and Amanda were sitting in front of the fire eating dinner together. They were both taking the night slowly and easily.

Lee got up and went to the kitchen for a moment, “Where are you going?” Amanda asked.

“You’ll see, be patient.” He responded from behind the refrigerator door.

Amanda laughed and turned her attention back to fire.

He returned a few moments later with a bowl of fruit. As he sat down next to her he set the bowl in between them.

Amanda looked up at Lee for a moment and rewarded him with a smile. “What’s this for?” She asked innocently.

“Dessert.” Lee said as he reached down for a strawberry and lifted up to her, “Here try this.”

Much of the evening went just like that, but soon grew more intense, mostly from the days’ events and emotions. Soon they were feeding each other and taking that simple act just one step further, and they spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms in front of the warm fire.

The next morning Amanda awoke first and snuggled into Lee as she lay in bed. ‘Funny’ she thought ‘I don’t remember going to bed?’

“Hey” Lee said as he pulled her even closer, “I know what you are thinking.”

“You do, do you? And what do you think I am thinking?” Amanda joked.

“How you got into bed last night.” He said flatly, although smiling.

“And you are going to enlighten me on this fact?”

“We both fell asleep, I woke up and well decided that we would be a lot more comfortable in bed, not laying on a hard wood floor.” He nuzzled her neck.

“Ahh, and that we are.” Amanda replied as she tried to turn around.

“Don’t” Was all he said, “I don’t want to leave this place, I want to stay here forever, here with you.”

“As much as that is appealing Lee..”

“I know Amanda I know.” He leaned down and gave her a kiss on her shoulder, “You know we have a lot to talk about.”

“Yes we do, but not here, when we get back, we will have a nice dinner, just the two of us.”

“Good, I am looking forward to it.”

Monday morning they arrived to work on time to have Billy call them down to his office.

“I take it everything is alright between you to.” Billy says as he watched them as they entered his office.

“Yeah everything is okay Sir.” Amanda was the first to speak, as always.

“Good because I have your next assignment.” Billy said as he handed them a file and thought ‘It’s about time.’