My truck kicks ass. It's nick
name is the beast. It's way better than yours. The photo above is not of my
truck, but a random one I came across on the internet." I
don't want you to know what I drive, you might just paint ball it as I go
by one day". But it closely resembles my truck. It's the
same year model and the same general condition as mine:redneckified!
My truck is a shining "well,
not exactly shining, more like a really dull luster" example of me. We
both are very large, ugly,extremely strong and consume large quantities of
fuel. I get 6mpg! Holy shit! But it's worth it, well worth it. I can lock
on to all the momma's/ daddy's boys tiny tot trucks I work and go to school
with and drag them all over my town, my truck not breaking a sweat. "I
hope it don't break a sweat. That would be freaky?!"
And wrecks? Todays vehicles get
into a minor fender bender, and your paying $600 for a new plexiglass bumber.
My trucks bumper weighs more than these little shit Nissan's running around.
"It's a 10' pipe made from pure steel welded onto the frame that stretches
out two inches past each side of my truck. If it comes off in a wreck, It
has to be an 18 wheeler who struck me. And his truck would definitely be screwed
up to".
BTW: Who the hell would call a truck that's
about the size of a Chevy S10 a Titan? Who the hell comes up with these names?
A kid with down syndrome or what?
My radio system is an 8track player I got from
a junk yard for $5 connected to a carpeted box of walmart speakers ($20).
All my co-workers think I got a sweet system because of how loud it gets,
but I just added a small crystal amp inside the 8track wich makes it pump
out 400watts.
Junkyard special 8track: $5
+Walmart
speakers: $20
=Total price for a bad ass radio all my freinds
envy the sound: $25.
My back tires are mudders I paid $45 for. They
both have excellent grip and tread on them.
My driver side ventilation window is busted
out "older vehicles had these" so I had to 'african Ingenuity' it.
(The redneck and dirty term for this is nigger rigging. I want everyone to
know I am not racist in the slightest bit, but it's a term that my father
used while I was growing up and it has stuck with me.) It has duct tape on
it to keep out the elements.
Everyone knows who's truck is coming down the
street day or night because of how loud my exshaust is. I have glass packs
on it. It was there when I bought it. Hence the nickname "beast",
because of its size, strength, and loud sound.
I bought my truck for $850. It has lasted me
two years so far and only broke down once: my alternator went out.
My point is :my truck is better than your truck.
While your worrieing about a bird shitting on your fine paint job that you
paid $5000 for, I paid a little under a grand for my truck, and it will out
race and out pull your truck. Period.
Don't even screw with the beast!