Billy
Hi, I'm William Riley. My paw called me Billy. He was always treatin' me like a baby. Now I'm the only man of the house, although we's not in our house no more--me and Maw are movin' in our wagon to find us a new place out west. We's been talkin' a lot about what it'll be like out there. She hopes there'll be lots of land so we can raise our horses and livestock again. We had to sell a lot of 'em before we left cause we needed the money and we didn't have use for 'em all.
Right now, we's under a dark sky, Maw and me. We's been travelin' a long, long time. Sometimes on nights like tonight, I wish Paw was here with us. I reckon I wouldn't be so scared if he was.
Bein' seven and a man is not as easy as I thought it would be.
A few days ago we joined a wagon train of people and most of 'em were smilin' and havin' a good time. I saw this fiery haired man--he was drinkin' whiskey and talkin' about his adventures when he was back home. He was makin' funny faces and drinkin' so much that he almost fell off the wagon! I told Maw I hope to be like him someday cause everyone was laughin' at him and havin' fun. She didn't think he was a great type a man to wanna be like. She thinks I should be more like another man in the wagon train, a man named Daniel Watson. He's a hard worker, Maw said, and she says she can tell all that by lookin' at his hands. We camped with 'em a few nights when the wagon master asked us to stay close to camp cause there are dangers out here. I didn't like the wagon master much, so I slept with my knife next to my head all the time we were near the wagon train people.
Tonight we's camped with the others. I've grabbed the fixins for the camp while Maw cooked. While we ate, I heard a wolf howl. I patted my knife that's tucked into my boot like Paw showed me. I'm glad he gave it to me for my birthday last year. It's the best present I e'er got--real nice--has my initials carved into its handle: WJR for William Jacob Riley. I'm not too fond of my name but it was my grandpappy's so I reckon I oughtta be proud of it bein' a family name and all.
It's been a few weeks travelin' and Maw's gotten sick with somethin'. She's real white and she don't eat much. I lay awake at night thinkin' about my life with Maw and Paw and all the fun we had when I was littler. We used to chase Jack our dog around the house and the first one to get him would win. Maw would sometimes let me win on accounta I'm just a kid. And once when Paw was workin' late at the mill, Maw and I dressed up in our nicest clothes and had dinner while pretendin' we was other peoples.
When I start to cry, I hear Paw sayin' in my head to remember I'm the man of the house now and I gotta be strong for Maw's sake. I should check on her now.
"Maw?"
"Yes, dear?"
"Are you sure you're not hungry? I saved you some biscuits."
"No, dear, you eat them. I'm not hungry."
"But you haven't eaten in three days and your face is so white," I said.
"Don't you worry your pretty little head about me, I'll be fine."
Maw put her arm around me and sang me the "Sweet Little Billy" song she sang for me when I was a babe in her arms.
"Sweet Billy, baby o' mine, Born in the middle o' the night. Eyes like your Paw, Smile of an angel. Sweet Billy, baby o' mine, I waited so long to hold you in my arms. Sweet little babe of the harvest, Your eyes danced in the moonlight that first night you were here. Hair so black and eyes so bright, Sweet Billy, baby o' mine."
Her voice is so beautiful, as beautiful as the birds singin' in the wind. Maw says e'ery time I hear that song I sleep like the dead. I don't wanna be dead, but I do wanna sleep.
"Maw?"
"Yes, Billy?"
"Will you sing it again, please?"
When Maw was done singin', I went into the back of the wagon and fell right asleep.
Tonight I set up Maw's tent close but not too close to the fire. There was some laughter comin' not far from us, so I told Maw I would check it out--it was still light enough out so I didn't need a lantern. I walked slowly past a grove of trees where I saw a glow of a fire near some wagons. I walked slowly so I wouldn't be heard. I smiled as I saw the man with fiery hair and a few others with him. They was drinkin' and tellin' stories. I knelt down behind a bush and listened.
"What was that?" The man with the fiery hair asked the men.
"I don't know Liam. Wouldn't you like to show us your skills and find out?"
"Naw, it's prob'ly an animal or somethin'," Liam said. He walked over to the bush I was behind and poked at it with the stick he just used to tend the fire.
I hollered and Liam and the men looked startled.
"Hello," I said standin'. "I'm Billy, remember me? I'm travelin' with my Maw."
"Oh, yeah, you and your Maw. I remember you both," the man with long black hair said.
"How ye doin' wee feller?" Liam asked.
"Not so good," I said pawin' at the dirt with my shoe. "Maw's sick."
"That's too bad," another man said.
This mornin', I woke up with the sun in my face and no breakfast cookin' on the fire. Maw was still sleepin', so I left a note for her on her pile of clothes so she wouldn'a miss me, and walked back to the other camp.
"Hi, laddy!" Liam said. "If ye be hungry, grab a bowl of breakfast and dig in."
I took a big bowl of stew and ate it quickly. Maw always said I was a growin' boy and growin' boys need lots of food. After breakfast was over, Liam took me to meet the rest of the wagon train. I met the wagon train master again--the one I don't like. He scowled at me a lot--I don't think he likes me much either. Then I met Liam's brother Michael and their friend Charles, the one with long black hair. Charles had a family once, but they all died of typhoid fever. He had a boy about my age and a baby girl about one. He showed me a picture he'd drawn of 'em; it was real good. I like drawin', 'cept I'm not real good at it. I once drawed a picture of Maw and Paw. They turned out like circles and one of Paw's arms was longer than the other. Maw liked it a whole bunch. She likes that kind of stuff.
I met some other people and was on my way back to be with Maw when the wagon master came up to me. Some of the women folk was with him and they was quiet for a while. They looked sad.
"It's your Maw, Billy" one of the women said. It was Emma Watson.
"What about her?" I asked. "Is she still sleepin' in her tent?"
"She's not sleepin' anymore," another one said with her head bowed. "Your maw is dead."
I started cryin' and hollerin' and runnin' to the camp so I could see if Maw was okay. I stopped halfway there so I could catch my breath. When I got to Maw's tent, she was very still inside. I touched her arm to wake her up, but she didn't move. Not even after I yelled, "MAW, GET UP!" I shook her again and nothin' happened. She was awfully cold, so I covered her up more. Just then, I heard footsteps outside. I turned around and it was Liam.
"Ye gonna be okay?" Liam asked with his head down.
"Sure I will," I said. "Maw will be up when she's feelin' better, I'm sure of it."
"Lad, ye gotta face it," Liam said. "Your Maw ain't gonna wake up. She's gone,"
"But Maw always said she'd be here with me fore'er." I started to cry.
"I know, I know," Liam said as he put his arm around me.
Maw was really gone. Just like Paw. I started to cry even harder. What was I gonna do? I didn't have no one to take care of me. I sniffed back my tears and started to pray.
My favorite Bible verse is John 3:16. It says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his only son so whoe'er believeth in him shall not perish but have e'erlastin' life." Maw told me it means that if you believe that Jesus died for you then you'll not really die when you die but you'll live fore'er in heaven. I know Maw is in heaven now and I don't have to be sad 'cause she's with Paw and Jesus and she's prob'ly up there talkin' about me. I hope she doesn't tell him about the time I skipped a rock across the creek and hit Homer, a kid from school back home who takes my lunch on accounta he's bigger than me.
"Ye all right, laddy?" Liam asked.
"Yeah, I'm okay." I ended my prayer and told God to take real good care of my Maw.
"Liam?" I asked. "What will we do with the oxen and horses and the wagon and stuff?"
"We'll have to take them with us," he said.
Then we walked back to the other camp. We went without talkin'.
The first person I saw was Daniel. He's got a new wife and they're travelin' west to find a new life. We have somethin' in common I guess.
His wife is real pretty. Her name is Emma an' she really likes eatin' as much as I do. She's gettin' a little bit too big for her dresses.
"Hi, Daniel," I said.
"Hi, Billy. How are things?"
I told him about Maw. "I got no one to take care of me now," I said with a frown and my face pointed down. I didn't wanna cry but I felt very alone.
"I'm sorry," Daniel said. "If you'd like, you could stay with Emma and me for a bit."
Just then Liam put his hand on my shoulder and led me away.
"It's all set up," he said and pointed to a big tree about a hundred yards away. "We'll have a burial service for your Ma right under that tree."
"All right," I said with tears makin' my eyes all blurry. I told Liam about Daniel invitin' me to stay with him and Emma. He thought that would be a real good idea.
It was a bright sun-filled day and the funeral for Maw was really nice. When they put her in the ground I cried a bit rememberin' about all the fun we had together. Later, I gathered my things in my wagon and gathered a few things of Maw's. I put them together inside my special box Paw made me from an old oak tree we used to have. It's the best lookin' box I e'er saw. Paw was real good at makin' stuff with his hands. He loved makin' stuff for Maw, and she loved e'erythin' he made her even when it didn't turn out like it was supposed to.
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