Courtesy

Respect, courtesy, and religion . . .
by: Weavre (30/F/Memphis, Tennessee, USA) 1/24/00 8:23 am EST

Just an observation . . . I try to teach my children that, regardless of whether any individual has earned "respect"--which I believe *should* be earned if it is to be given--absolutely everyone is still to be treated with courtesy. Even those we don't particularly like are deserving of pleasant manners. What an improvement we'd make in all the simple things if "courtesy" was a more common guideline for our behavior! When we eat out, I both model and explain to my children that we allow others to enjoy their meals in peace, by using quiet voices and "quiet body language." If I split a meal with a friend, I tip the server approximately 15% of what the bill *would* have been, had we ordered separately--her or his workload is the same either way, after all. We say "Please," and "Thank you," and "Would you like me to . . .?" and "Yes, Ma'am." We smile. And, when we're driving, I signal my turns and generally observe the rules of on-the-road courtesy as well.

Courtesy isn't restricted to Sundays, or to Christians, or to restaurant customers. Courtesy is a set of guidelines for behavior that help us all to interact more pleasantly in social situations, and that indicates a general acknowledgement of shared humanity. The person whose job it is to bring my food at the restaurant is every bit as human and as deserving of pleasantness as anyone else. And, this is true regardless of gender, skin tone, religion, orientation, or any other variable. It's even true if, for whatever reason, I don't like him or her.

Memphis could certainly benefit from more courtesy--and let's please not confuse that issue with religion. Regardless of one's spiritual beliefs, we're all people living together in a relatively densely populated area. We can certainly manage to be nice to one another, whatever our religious beliefs!

Many dreams and many blessings,
Weavre

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