This is excellent stuff.....
  These are from a book called "Disorder in the Court". These are things
  people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now
  published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these
  exchanges were actually taking place,but u need not !! So, sit back and  Enjoy !!
 
1)
  Q: What is your date of birth?
  A: July fifteenth.
  Q: What year?
  A: Every year.

2) 
  Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
  A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

3) 
  Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
  A: Yes.
  Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
  A: I forget.
  Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've
 forgotten?

4) 
  Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
  A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
  Q: How long has he lived with you?
  A: Forty-five years.

5) 
  Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up
       that  morning?
  A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
  Q: And why did that upset you?
  A: My name is Susan.

6) 
  Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep,
       he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
 
7)
  Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
 
8)
  Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
 
9)
  Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
  A: Yes.
  Q: And what were you doing at that time?

10) 
 Q: She had three children, right?
  A: Yes.
  Q: How many were boys?
  A: None.
  Q: Were there any girls?

11) 
  Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
  A: By death.
  Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

12)
  Q: Can you describe the individual?
  A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
  Q: Was this a male, or a female?
 
13) 
  Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
  A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

14)
  Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
  A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
  Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
  A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
      autopsy.

15) 
  Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
       pulse?
  A: No.
  Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
  A: No.
  Q: Did you check for breathing?
  A: No.
  Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began
       the autopsy?
  A: No.
  Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
  A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
  Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
  A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
       practising law somewhere.

HOPE U ENJOYED THE ABOVE JOKES !! BYE - FROM RANJITH