It's something you find
But you can't see
Something in you
And maybe in me.
I am afraid of friendship
It's never been kind to me
I give my love freely
It's always thrown back to me.
I would like to have someone
That I can tell my hopes and dreams to
To laugh with, to make them smile.
I do not think I ask to much
To have someone I can hug-touch
Their life with happiness
Give them the love only friendship can posess
I do not want a lovers caress
I need a friends tenderness
Lust and devotion is not what I need
Heart and emotion is what I'd like to see
Reach out to me oh friendly passer by!
As I reach out to you-
To my dismay
You don't even look my way
And just keep marching on
Rushing in the day
My love diminishes
With each person who shuns me
The burning love in my heart
Is torture on my soul
My friendlessness envokes me
As I become my own.
The lonliness attacked my brain
And then my heart and soul
The peeling ceiling
In this little room
Has become my best friend
I am no longer alone now
While I'm strapped to this wretched bed.
The ceiling started peeling
The day that I moved in-
The pain it's tears of happiness
To finally have a friend.

~*~MBJ~*~
4-1998