The Harsh Light Of Day :

I can't stop thinking about you. Sometimes, in my dreams, you're all naked.

Sexual intercourse, I've said it, like, a dozen times.
I think it's the secret to getting you out of my mind. Putting you behind me. Behind me figuratively. I'm thinking face-to-face for the event itself.

I like you. You're funny, and you're nicely shaped. And frankly, it's ludicrous to have these interlocking bodies and not... interlock. Please remove your clothing now.



Fear, Itself :

What? Bunnies frighten me.



Pangs :

To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's ritual sacrifice. With pie.

What's she doing? Xander said he was gonna dig. I want to see Xander dig.

We'll die together. It's romantic. Let me get your trousers off.



Something Blue :

I'd been dumbed. I was miserable. Doing a few vengeance spells - boils on a penis, nothing fancy.



Hush:

This isn't a relationship. You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.



A New Man :

A gift is traditional. I read about it.



The I In Team :

What a stupid game. All these rules just to win little plastic discs.



Goodbye Iowa :

You know, you really should get yourself a boring boyfriend. Like Xander. You can't have Xander.

So dumb him. But you can't have Xander.



Who Are You :

Well, I'm glad you called us all here, because that information could never be conveyed by telephone.



Superstar :

Yes. And then we could run for help while the other three suck your heart out through your neck.

Well, they weren't very well organized. If they'd all rushed at Buffy, they could have killed her right away.

You're not going away. Why aren't you going away?

Oh. sure. Come on in, make yourself at home. And so on.

Oh, you're still here? That's nice.

Buck up, you. You kill the best. Go you. Kill, kill.

Vengeance wishes, on ex-boyfriends. I'd wish he was a dog, or ugly, or in love with President McKinley, or something.

Sure, alternate realities. You could have, like, a world without shrimp. Or with, you know, nothing but shrimp. You could even make, like, a freaky world where Jonathan's like, some kind of not- perfect mouth-breather, if that's what's blowing up your skirt these days. Just don't ask me to live there.

Alternate realities are neat.



Where the Wild Things Are :

I don't understand. I'm pretty, I'm young. Why didn't you take advantage of me? Is there something wrong with your body?

Spike! What are you doing? You made me yell really high!

Oh, well, that's just ludicrous. You can't hurt me because you've got that chip in your brain. Also, I like my money the way it is... when it's mine.

Oh, now, come on! You're not even bumpy anymore!

I'm beginning to understand why you're so friendless.

A year and a half ago, I could have eviscerated him with my thoughts. Now I can barely hurt his feelings. Things used to be so much simpler.

We didn't have sex, if that's what you mean. That's all I do now, not have sex.

I'm just trying to tell you that we have nothing in common besides both of us liking your penis, and now I don't even have that!

What good are weapons against disembodied spirits, Xander? They have no ass to kick.

Shut up, repressed crybabies!



The Yoko Factor :

Wow - the chip in your head means you can't even point a gun? How humiliating.



Primeval :

Xander. You said you wanted to check the board at the unemployment office this morning. (lifts blanket) You can't go like that. They won't even interview you if you're naked.

So they all think you're a lost, directionless loser with no plans for the future. Pfft!

You're a good person and a good boyfriend, and... and I'm in love with you.



Restless :

It's exactly like a Greek tragedy. There should only be Greeks.

I think this is going to be a very big year for vengeance.

I'll be fine. I think I've figured out how to steer by gesturing emphatically.

Quiet! You'll miss the humorous conclusion.



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