I. A few of my friends and I have decided that my algebra teacher does not have a soul. He's nice and all, but there is nothing behind his eyes, and he is VERY hyper. We have come up with these theories:
1. He is but an alien host sent here to live peacefully.
2. He seems nice, but it's just a cover up, and he steals people's souls.
3. He's a cyborg.
II. All great composers go mad. Here are some examples: 1. Beethoven drank coffee with 60 beans a cup, and dumped cold buckets of water over his head at night so that he wouldn't fall asleep.
2. Tchaicowsky drank gallons of contaminated water when he decided he had written all that he was meant to.
III. Phyciatrists are less sane then most of their patients. To back this up, I think that all I need to say is "Frasier."
IV. Mean people rarely get sick.
1. Have you ever noticed how your least favorite teacher very rarely has a substitue?
V. The secret to extreme intelect is coffee. Lots and lots of coffee, exploding with sugar and cream. Hey, it's working for me so far.
VI. Cows are planning to take over the world.
1. They are every where, leaving them at a good stance for striking.
2. They never separate from one another, always staying in close herds.
3. They must be getting fairly perturbed, considering we steal their milk, and eat them.
VII. The Bermuda Triangle has been created by dolphins.
1. Think about it, they've been around for longer then us, and they are said to be the smartest animal.
2. The Triangle could be where they study humans, an occasional specimen being brought in. I believe that they are gentle animals, and wouldn't harm the people, and eventually are prbably willing to release them, but their world would be so much better than ours, that the people wouldn't want to leave.
VIII. The world is like a huge state, and we're off in the boonies with no neighbors for miles (or lightyears) around.
IX. There is no such thing as circles, they're only polygons with billions of sides
The following has been contributed by:Tad
X. string theory 1: if you take apart a piece of string, what do you get? more pieces of string. and that? still more string. therefore string is infinite. string = infinite
string theory 2:
accourding to string theory one, string is infinite. but after taking apart all of the string, you will be left with only twine, and no string. therefore string is nothing. string = nothing
string theory 3:
accepting the truth of the previous two theorys. string = infinite and string = nothing. therefore (useing transitive property of equality, for all you math wizzs out there) infinite = nothing.
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