18

"Check." Sarkon was in a difficult situation. Playing chess against cookie wasn't easy for sure: the harlequin always made these weird, seemingly random moves he could never foresee, and somehow he always ended up being cornered. But this time, Sarkon saw the way out. He made his move, and, satisfied, leaned back. "Check again and... Guard your queen!" Another random move he hadn't foreseen. Sarkon realized he'd have to think very hard this time to avoid yet another loss. He thought, and thought, and thought... And while he was thinking, Dr. Qworm dropped for a visit, and suddenly, a sharp rise in the surrounding radioactivity (never negligible in Dr. Qworm's presence) mutated the game! The figures on the board had been rearranged in the following manner:

_____________ ¦K¦R¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦B¦K¦          K: King ¦B¦H¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦H¦R¦ ¦P¦P¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦P¦P ¦          R: Rook ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦   ¦ ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦  ¦   ¦          B: Bishop ¦P¦P¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦P¦P ¦ ¦R¦H¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦H¦B¦          H: Knight ¦K¦B¦P¦  ¦  ¦P¦R¦K¦                                   P: Pawn

While Sarkon, looking at the board, wondered if his thinking too hard hadn't impaired his mental abilities permanently, cookie exclaimed, "Hey, a new game! Let's get General Kwar so that we can all play it together!" In the wink of an eye cookie was off and back, dragging General Kwar by his sleeve. "What's that? Chess? But the figures are placed wrong..." the Dictator stated. "It's some kind of team chess, obviously. We could play in teams of two, and the goal would be to checkmate one of the enemy kings!" cookie invented. "How should we name it? Crosschess?" wondered Sarkon. "I propose Crusade," said Dr. Qworm, "because of the space forming a cross in the middle of the board, and because of the four bishops." Since Dr. Qworm was the one who had mutated the original chess game in the first place, his proposal was agreed upon, and they settled to play. General Kwar, enticed by the perspective of winning a battle, insisted on teaming with cookie against Sarkon and Dr. Qworm. And in spite of Qworm's mutating the opponents' rooks, knights and bishops into mere pawns and cookie's sometimes aberrant moves*, and thanks to Sarkon's inability to concentrate enough to predict his own victory, General Kwar and cookie the harlequin ended winning. *Or because of them. If you can imagine cookie's "Crusade" rules, check at 20; if not, go to 17. If you'd rather see them all playing together some more, do so at 21.