Jona Welle

Autobiography

 

            Who I am today has been affected by many things as I was growing up.  Things like family, gender, class, and the area in which I grew up especially contributed to the person I am today.  All of these things helped me to build character and create a basis for my personality, and how I interact with people.

            For starters, I grew up in a small community in the middle of Minnesota.  I was raised entirely on a farm, and the characteristics I developed in the open country still show through today.  My parents taught me to be a nice person, and I believe this is still my defining quality.  We were a middle class family, with middle class values, always living conservatively.  Under the watchful eye of my Father, on the farm, I learned responsibility and how to deal with my problems.  Both my Mother and Father were always around for my siblings and I, and I know that this directly affected how I felt about myself growing up.  I still know that no matter how bad things get, my family will always be there for me.

            Also, in the small community, I learned how to socialize.  Because of the way I was raised, I became known as a nice guy.  From my friends, I learned how to have fun and interact with others.  Being in a small community, I saw the same people all of the time, and got to know them very well.  Consequently, today I have a hard time going places where I do not know anyone, because it makes me nervous.  I know this trait comes from not having to deal with new people when I was growing up.  Also living in a small community, everyone kept tabs on me as well as other members of the community, this caused me to adapt to the motto “Don’t live it up if you can’t live it down”.

            Growing up as a male also effected who I have become.  My family raised me traditionally, and I have been influenced by standard male and female roles.  I grew up seeing men as completely masculine, and doing things the “manly” way.  I learned to appreciate hard physical labor, and see that the man was suppose to be the workhorse and tough guy.  On the contrary, I saw women as being both feminine and masculine, because in school they competed in sports and were just as competitive as males.  Therefore, I have a view that women can be masculine, but men should not be feminine.

            This view of male and female roles is still evident in my personality, but I am overcoming it.  When I chose to go to college to become a teacher, it just felt somewhat wrong.  My Father is a farmer, my brother a carpenter, and it seems only logical that I should be doing a trade.  I am the first person in my family to attend a 4-year college, and it feels as though I am faking my future.  My parents offer me full support, as well as the community.  I guess everyone has always told me that someday I would make a good teacher, so I know I am doing what people expected of me.  However, I do not know if I am who I want to be.  I believe that someday I will make a good teacher, I just feel as though I was born and raised to be a laboring tradesman, and I am cheating by becoming educated.

            Society and the media have not affected me as far as who I am, but I feel often times that my beliefs are contradictory to what the media presents.  In today’s world, “anything” is accepted into the mainstream, but I am still stuck with the traditional views.  I see little things people do and think they are weird.  For example, I often find myself analyzing people based on what they wear, what they eat, and what they drink, among other things.  People that have piercings, or wear different clothing strike me as weird.  Guys that do not eat meat strike me as extremely weird, and even guys that prefer a fruity liquor over a beer seem weird.  I know that this line of thought is very stupid, but I think that some of it is just my traditional country background showing through.

            On the other end, rather than growing up affecting me now, since I moved away, I have come to view past beliefs as wrong.  When I was growing up, my family was religious, and so I was religious.  Now in college, I have put a lot of thought to my place in my parents religion and find that I do not fit the mold.  Rather than just conceding to beliefs of my community and family, I question everything, and think independently.  So much so, to the point that now I am a cynic, and I don’t believe anything unless I can see or touch it, or at the very least, rationalize it.  I feel as though I am at the point in my life where everyday my views are changing with the more knowledge and viewpoints that I possess.

            Overall, these factors that have made a difference in my life, and how I view the world.  I am very hesitant on putting these views on paper, because I am unsure about all of them.  I am sure in the future, that these things will change, and I will hopefully be a better version of myself.  In the end, I am trying to keep an open mind on my life, and how I view the world.