I wonder how many of us (women, that is) get in "blue moods"? I find that my life seems to flow in cycles - and not necessarily in conjunction with the moon. I find that a change in the weather (for the cool and crisp) can perk me up for days with an energy that knows no bounds and that a break from the constant (Texas) sunshine, with a welcome cloudy day will send me straight into a cleaning mode. And the seasons, especially the Winter ones, have a powerful influence on me. I find myself getting more and more excited as Christmas draws near and more and more regretful as June approaches.
I must just be a winter person.
You see, I was raised in the midwest, right next to Lake Michigan. I miss that location terribly. (But I don't miss driving on the icy roads or competing for highway lane space with monster-semi's from the Pit.) Like anyone I want my cake and eat it too and I guess there are good and bad things to all kinds of climates, but around this time of year in particular, I find myself wishing for some of the sparkling white stuff to perk me up. Ohhhh, to hear it crunch underfoot in the dark and cold mornings like it used to do years ago and in another place. I would skip out of the house in a fluffy chenille robe and warm, bunny slippers to catch the morning paper. Oh yes, and the smell of the air. So fresh and brisk and clean. And after I had grabbed the paper and started to run for the safe warm shelter of my house once again, I would catch the greeting the kitchen always seemed to send. Its aromatic signals, much stronger than my kitchen down here gives off: coffee, cinnamon toast, oatmeal with butter, even eggs had their own delicious aroma and called out in chorus with the rest of my waiting breakfast. No, there is something missing here in my Texas home, but I am not exactly sure as to what.
Could it be as we grow from youth to adult that our senses dull? Maybe my environment here is just as inviting as the one of my late youth and I just don't absorbit the way I did back then? I don't know. It just doesn't seem the same, somehow.
With the time having just changed to Daylight Savings (never really understood that concept very well) the sky is once again light when Keith and I leave for work in the morning, but already dark by the time we get home. I don't know about anyone else, but the amount of light in the day also effects my moods dramatically. I tend to hibernate more now in the evening - it's as if my body is saying "Hey look Mama! It's dark and therefore time for bed!" The only problem is my mind is saying.....well,..... who knows what my mind says. Let's just say it says it loudly and incessantly and won't shut down long enough to allow me to "turn in" the way the rest of me body wants to. And this, too, leads to that "blue mood" I was talking about earlier. There is nothing that really *wakes me up* after a day of work. Nothing fresh, crisp or exciting. Just dark, damp and blah! Consequently, I cuddle in my easy chair and usually waste most of an otherwise perfectly good evening away, when I should be productive. Though I do still crochet, or knit. And I guess that's productive. (At least for the recipients of my labor.)
For instance, I was "going to town" last night on the latest afghan project. I am using a simple shell stitch and doubling up on the yarn, using two strands instead of one (I was particularly cold when I started planning this one). It is in "Christmas/Yule" colors of green, deep red and some blue, but in a variegated yarn so I don't need to fuss with ends at it's completion. I am amazed at how much yarn I am "putting away" in this thing, but last night, Keith had apparently been watching me instead of the TV, and commented on "how can you make your fingers go that fast. I guess I look like a really accomplished genius to him; therefore, I will not spoil it by telling him that anyone could do it. Just take a no brainer pattern, a bored person and a dark yucky night and TaDA: You have a new afghan.
And tonight will be the same, I am afraid. I already have no ambition, so by the time I stop by the store to pick up everything I forgot last night (salt, bread, and sweetner), and get home, I'll be lucky to makeit to my chair before I collapse. Dinner is leftovers, so hubby can fend for himself------it would really be a perfect evening to get something done-----but I think I will pass to another day what can be done just as well then and settle in for some serious crocheting instead. If the cat will let me.
Picture this if you will. L.C., my cat, (stands for "Last Chance"), likes to claim my blankets long before they are even done and my current project is no exception. Now that it is long enough to cover my lap and legs as I work, she takes that as a sign that she must position herself smack dab in the middle of the thing while I am working on it. And of course, tonight will be no exception.
Funny.....as I have written this out and planned ahead my time, I seem to be lifting a bit out of that "blue" mood. I guess I have all the memories I need right here and now to fill my future with, I just need to get busy and start making them, one night at a time. Interesting - I had forgotten to remember to remember to make a memory and now that I have, the evening doesn't seem so bland and blue after all! And whether that makes any sense or not, I now must say: "Good night sweet friends".
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