So which is easier to take care of, a boy or a girl? That has been a topic of debate for my friends and I for a while. Where did it arise from? From an innocent speculation of what kind of parents we would make. Okay, so due to inexperience, chances are that what I am about to say may not be totally accurate. I hope not, because if it is, I'm never having children!

I've had a few conversations with a few friends about which, if any, sex of child is harder to raise. None of us being parents, of course, a lot of what we had to say was pure conjecture. The majority of my friends, particularly the guys, have a distinct fear of having daughters someday. They feel that girls are harder to take care of, and that girls are more of a worry for parents especially in their dating years.

I do not think that girls are harder to take care of than boys. Many people say that they are because girls act pampered and spoiled. If a girl was out until very late, more parents would be worried than if a boy was out until the same time. Their view is that girls do not know how take care of themselves in difficult situations; that girls can be attacked or violated more easily than boys. Boys can take care of themselves in those types of situations. Boys cannot be violated.

The only way girls become "girly"^* and like being pampered and spoiled is if they are raised that way. And if you raise your girls right and teach them to defend themselves the way boys are taught, you don't need to worry about them at all! Most girls can't protect themselves because they were never taught how. Or they were raised surrounded by images that basically say that women are the weaker sex, are helpless, etc. They are not taught to stand up for themselves. Many are still taught either through images on TV, and magazines or by their peers that girls are not supposed to fight. Those that do are described by the media or others as "bitches" or "cats" or something equally derogatory. And parents are hardly ever around nowadays to tell their kids otherwise.

And boys are just as impossible at the teenage stage. They are surrounded by peers and role models that may do drugs, do the odd small crime, treat girls as sex objects. They are given the maxim of having to prove themselves macho, and brave. As a result, boys are just as likely, if not more to get caught up in something that can have them ending up dead than girls. (Drunk driving, joy riding, drug deals, etc) They are more daring, and just as hard to control as girls. Most guys, I'm sure are not like that either, but again, that is the result of good parental influence. As for the fact that boys cannot get violated, it depends on your definition of "violated." While a boy cannot be raped, he can be seduced by girls or dared by other boys to do things that he wouldn't do otherwise. Either way, he can turn out becoming an early parent, or he can contract diseases that are not at all pleasant. Just the same as a girl. Isn't it just as bad if your son contracts AIDS as if your daughter gets pregnant?

The teenage years are no picnic for parents of either sex (ask any parent). And so, if your child hasn't come back home yet, and it is 3:00am, wouldn't you still be worried whether it was a boy or a girl? For either sex, they could have been in an accident, they could be in trouble with the law, or they could be getting intimate with a peer. I don't like this attitude that some parents have that if their son stays out till all hours, they aren't worried that they may be "violating" a girl, whereas the exact and very polar opposite is true for girls being "violated." In either case, it should be just as alarming. By being this lax on the son, he is getting the impression that it is okay for him to do this, whereas the girl is getting the impression that she is committing a tremendous sin (or the boy is) by doing the exact same thing. Am I the ONLY one who sees something wrong with this?

You're worried about someone having sex with your daughter? Start the education at home! Educate the boys. Stop giving them the image and the impression that there is nothing wrong with it!

And please, please, PLEASE, can we do away with the double standard sex education ("Son, you going out tonight? You're staying overnight? Okay, but if you're gonna have sex, use a condom." "Daughter, you get back home by 11:30 sharp. No, you cannot stay over at Michelle's tonight if guys are going to be there. You never know what they want to do.")!

I'm not saying that girls are easier to take care of than boys, but I do question whether boys are easier to take care of as many of my friends would have me believe. I think it's wrong that parents should worry less about their son than their daughter. I think that they are both equally hard to take care of. And I also think that no one should sell a daughter short. If a girl turns out to be the epitome of a "girly" girl, I think the parents and society as a whole only has itself to blame. Both sexes can learn to protect themselves. The daughter should be no more a cause of worry than the son. If she is given the same fighter image that guys are given, she will know very well how to look after herself.

If the child is raised right, no matter what the sex, they shouldn't necessarily be a cause of worry. Either way, it is a lot of work. Either way, it will be hard. But raising a girl does not have to take more effort (or more Antacid) than a boy.

^* A "girly girl" is, by my definition, a girl who cannot and will not look out for herself. A girl who worries more about how she looks than say school work, PE class, learning self defence, or anything that would require exertion and ruin her hair/nails/clothes. Usually, she is shallow, not necessarily intelligent, or at least she is fixated on shallow, surface things. Newsweek gets tossed aside for Cosmo every time. Intellectual debates make her yawn, and she doesn't know enough or isn't interested enough about those topics to join in. She can run circles around you however if she wants to debate stripes or spots in next year's fashion trends. In other words, a Bimbo^TM. She is every Heartless Bitch's nightmare.

 

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