Newborn Quiz

I'm going to give you a few multiple choice questions that I want you to answer honestly. If you have amazing mental powers, you can keep track of the answers in your head. If you're like the rest of us, it might be easier to write them down.

This is just like all of those teen zine quizzes about boyfriends and hair, if you were into that. The best part is, no one will ever see your answers! This is something for you. A little soul searching, you might say. Just remember, this is purely unscientific and untested. Here goes! Close your book and take out your paper and pen!

1.) What do you think a newborn looks like?

A. A Cute little cherub with chubby cheeks and darling smile.
B. A blue eyed, cuddly, bundle of joy.
C. A squashed, conical headed, fuzzy, squinty, blotchy thing not at all resembling those adorable diaper commercial babies.
D. A tiny little boy or girl that, despite the slightly misshapen head could easily be a smaller version of the cute cuddly 7 month old down the block.


2.) How many messy diapers does a breastfed newborn have a day?

A. 1-3
B. 4-5
C. 6-8
D. 5-7


3.) How often do you need to feed your newborn?

A. He eats when I eat
B. Every 4 hours
C. Every 1 to three hours
D. Every 3-4 hours


4.) How many wet diapers does newborn have?

A. 1-3
B. 4-5
C. 6-8
D. 5-7


5.) How likely is your little boy to pee on you or the wall, or something you desperately don't want him to pee on?

A. My little boy would NEVER do that!
B. Maybe once or twice, tops!
C. Whenever he gets the chance!
D. Sometimes.


6.) List three rather alarming things commonly found in newborns.

A. Sweet disposition, rarely cries, sleeps all night right away.
B. Sweet disposition, slightly conical head shape, six toes.
C. Weird cone-shaped head, discharge from the vagina/enlarged penis, milky discharge from nipples (in boys and girls)
D. Slightly conical head, splotchy skin, a little out of proportion.

7.) Where do belly buttons come from?

A. Elves
B. Pixies
C. The umbilical cord
D. The placenta


8.) How soon can you give your newborn a real bath?

A. Right after he/she pops out!
B. Any time I feel like it.
C. After the umbilical cord stump falls off.
D. When he/she is a week old.


9.) What will your newborn do for fun?

A. Party.
B. Shake her/his rattle, make noises, play games.
C. Sleep, watch people/things.
D. Begin interacting with Mom.


10.)How much does a newborn sleep?

A. 8 hours
B. 9 hours
C. 12-18 hours
D. 10-12 hours



Well, that's it. You're done taking the quiz. Now you've got to score it.

A's = 0 points B's = 1 point C's = 3 points D's = 2 points

How'd you do?

0-10 points : Please, for the sake of your baby, take this seriously!! You need to know this stuff, or give your baby to someone who does. It's not too late! Talk with your doctor, if you don't have one, get one. Talk with your Mom if you can. Talk with your Grandma. Jeez, email me! You have some serious choices ahead of you. Doing nothing is a choice, too.

10-20 points : You've got a ways to go yet, but at least you're heading there. Read up on this, take a lamaze or prepared childbirth class at your local hospital. Don't give up! You'll get there.

20-30 points : I'm proud of you! You obviously care enough about yourself and your baby that you're trying to do the right thing. Be informed! This is the tip of the ice burg. Pretty soon you're going to be handed a screaming, funny looking baby and it's up to you to know what to do with it. You're the Mom now, you're the one who has to have the answer.


I hope you did well. Next time you visit, I'm going to be going over the topic of newborn care in greater detail. Like I said before, building this site is going to take time. I hope you'll be patient with me.

If you have any questions, email me at "Ilyssa13@hotmail.com." I'll answer you as soon as I can, promise.


Back to Index

This section has been hit times since May 19, 1998