In my travels and times on line, it has been my pleasure to meet and become friends with someone with a very unique but not uncommon disorder, MPD. This page is my effort to bring to you as much information as I can concerning this disorder, and to introduce my friend to you through her words and writings, and the words and writings of some of her "littles." I hope that you will take this journey into her world, and try to understnad both the illness that overtook her life, and the wonderful woman that she has become today. This is something that one of her "littles" wrote and it says volumes.
A multiple is like a flower that closes before it opens. The flower still develops petals like other flowers, but each petal, when it is formed, closes in or curls over itself. The flower stays in a tight bud, protecting the original birth child who is hidden deep inside. The task of therapy is to gently lay back all the petals one by one, opening up the flower to find the center. Many of you are wondering "Just what Is this MPD? Well, From time to time, we all experience differing states of mind, like happiness or anger, but underneath our changing reactions to the changing world around us lies our personality, fixed and stable traits that determines who we are. Hence, switching from one personality to another in a moment seems strange, even frightening. The root of the condition we call multiple personality disorder is dissociation. Mild dissociation, the feeling we get when we "zone out" when things feel too overwhelming, is considered a normal defense mechanism. But when children exposed to severe, prolonged trauma must dissociate constantly, the need to shift from one personality state to another can become permanent Multiple Personality and Dissociative Disorders occur as a result of prolonged traumatic child sexual, physical, emotional, or ritual abuse. It is estimated that 1 in 100 people may suffer from Multiple Personality and other Dissociative Disorders. With correct diagnosis and appropriate treatment, people have the potential for complete recovery. SOME FACTS ABOUT MPD the host personality may not hear what is being said or remember events that have happened. not all alters know each other. many alters hear what is being said and may react differently. Dissociation is a coping mechanism, NOT attention seeking behaviour. some alters do not understand that they are sharing one body. persons with MPD seldom trust anyone. SOME TERMS YOU SHOULD KNOW SWITCHING - term used to describe the change from one personality state to another. HOST - major presenting personality. ALTERS - all other personalities. TRIGGER - anything that causes a person to remember a traumatic event or switch to another personality. SOME SYMPTOMS OF MPD lack of appropriate emotional response. memory loss, lost time, not knowing what you've said or done feeling dream-like, a sense of watching yourself speak or act. experiencing dissociation which might include dizziness, headaches, numbness in body parts, feeling disjointed, spontaneous trance states. not remembering childhood or major life events. hearing voices or thoughts that don't seem to belong to you. unexplained items in your possession. drastic and rapid changes in mood and behaviour. addictions, eating disorders and disruptive sleep patterns. suicide attempts and self destructive behaviours. display of hypervigilance. denial of behaviour observed by others. NOTE: Many of these symptoms may be characteristic of other disorders. WHY WOULD A PERSON WITH MPD SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP? usually out of sheer desperation. complete mental and physical exhaustion. inability to sleep. problems with drug or alcohol abuse. suicidal thoughts or actions. fear for life. need for SAFETY and PROTECTION. need for help with crises caused by remembering. SOME TYPES OF ALTERS CHILD ALTERS - believe themselves to be a specific age and display behaviours that are appropriate for that age. PROTECTIVE ALTERS - protect the body at all costs. Often use anger as a defence. SUICIDAL ALTERS - often programmed to self-destruct rather than speak the truth. DEPRESSED ALTERS - often hold memories that are so painful, they want to die. There are often many Alters that play specific roles and have tasks for which they are responsible.
sarahs poem tears Tears are the rain of a heart thats wrapped in clouds, Tears are the joy in a new mothers eyes, Tears are the song of the whole world exalting, Tears are the pride when our soul learns to fly. Tears are the pain inside the shame that binds us, Tears heal the hurt that makes us feel alone, Tears speak the words our hearts cant bear to say, Tears are a cry for help when we reap what we have sown, Tears are the anger at a young child's dying, Tears are a warning that someones gone too far, Tears are the majesty of a new dawn awakening, Tears are the quiet in a silver evening star. So welcome your tears, all their laughter and their sorrow, Let your thoughts and your emotions become as one, Remember that tears are tiny, shining crystals, And remember they make rainbows when they touch the sun.
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