What this is all about...

I created this website because while it's really easy to find websites out there dedicated to heterosexual, condom-based safer sex, it's pretty hard to find any information about any other kinds of safer sex. The focus of this site will mostly revolve around safer sex for the ladies, as I feel there's a terrible lack of websites dedicated to the way we love men, each other, and ourselves. But don't worry, guys, I'm sure you can find something in here, too.

My other goal is to put out a website that has one thing many websites pertaining to Safer Sex don't; let's face it, most of the Safer Sex websites out there are really lacking in the one basic element that should be integral to anything involving sex: fun!

So, I figure that we'll start out with the basics.

Forms of Contraception and Disease Prevention.

• Abstinence.Now, as we all know, this the absolute safest way to go. The chances of you catching some nasty STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection) are fairly slim if you're not engaging in any sexual activity whatsoever. However, for those of you who are a little more... frisky... *grin*... This might not be an option with which you're comfortable.
• The Pill, Depoprovera ,, Cervical Caps, Diaphragms, and IUD's These are great for the prevention of pregnancy, but should definitely *not* be used alone, even in a monogamous relationship. No matter how much you trust your partner, it never hurts to have a backup. And you can tell him/her/or it so! For more information on these and other pregnancy prevention tactics, check out the link on the links page to the sexual health info center.
• the CONDOM!A special favorite of college students and swinging cats everywhere, the condom is a versatile means of protecting yourself and the one you're with. To look at a really neat trick I learned at some of the safer sex talks I've been to, click here.
• Dental Dams.These little things are gems. Ladies, no longer do you have to cut open a condom to engage in oral sex! Oral pleasure never had it so safe (and so good!) These are little pieces of latex that you place over the vagina and/or anus, and are used, essentially, for oral stimulation (i.e., your tongue and mouth). They're hard to find sometimes, but you can get them at most any medical supply store, or women's clinic. Now, some people don't like the dental dam, because, honestly, it is pretty thick. But that's OK, there are substitutes. Saran Wrap, for instance, is a great barrier, and it feels a lot better than the latex. But don't skimp on the plastic wrap, kids; brand names *ARE* better in this instance, and you're better off using a brand name than risking it.
• GLOVES.Latex Gloves or Latex Finger Gloves. It seems extreme to some people, and superfluous, but actually, the spread of AIDS, HIV, Hepatitis, and other STI's can easily happen from hand to genital contact... almost as easily as genital to genital contact. Don't forget, these infections/diseases aren't spread by the body parts, but by the fluids in those body parts. In other words, if you have a paper cut, and you're making your partner happy with digital sex, you could both be in quite a bit of trouble if you don't put on a glove or finger glove. You can get these at any medical supply, pharmacy, or drug store chain (like CVS, etc.) I even found a pack at Wal-Mart.
• LUBE! Last, but most definitely not least. Lube makes life a little more interesting. Besides facilitating anal, vaginal, digital, *and* some oral sex, lube makes things all slippery and fun. Using a little lube with your glove, or dental dam, can make a really cool sensation that makes up for the latex by a lot. Always remember to used WATER BASED LUBE! This is imperative. Oil based lubricants such as Vaseline, baby oil, and lotion cause latex to break in a matter of seconds; try it some time. Drip a drop of baby oil on a stretched out condom or dental dam, and see what happens. But don't expect to be using that latex for protection afterwards! Also, some lubes have nonoxynol-9 (I know I spelled that wrong) in them, which is a spermicide. Convenient, no? *grin* Just make sure you're not allergic.

"Keep Smurfing, my little Smurflings!

-Papa Smurf, the Smurfs

HELP! I'm allergic to Latex

Actually, this is a problem for a lot of people. That's why some companies have come out with a viable alternative; polyurethane condoms. They're not nearly as elastic; actually, they barely stretch at all. But considering the alternative, you're probably better off using the condom. They have different sizes. *grin* If you want one (or more), there's a link on the links page. "Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me, I want to feel dirty..." -Janet Weiss, the Rocky Horror Picture Show

Stuff Your Friend Told You That's Not True

We trust our friends, most of the time. When we have a problem, or need advice, we feel like we can go to them to get the right answers; especially when we don't feel like we can talk to anyone older, who might have more experience. Of course, the blind leading the blind is a great way to spread misinformation, and before you know it, we have the wildest rumors going around about what does and doesn't work as far as contraception and disease prevention goes.

I've been doing this page for a while, and I've gotten a lot of letters in that time; some asking serious, thought provoking questions... others asking dumb questions like, "How many positions do you know?" (which, by the way, is probably a bigger number than the person who asked me that can count up to), and a lot of questions that while on the surface, seem obvious, really need to be answered; or rather, they're urban legends that need to be dispelled. Consider this my personal effort to make one less person misinformed.
 

The Myths	The Facts
If a guy pulls out of a girl before he ejaculates (cums), they don't need a condom, and she won't get pregnant.	WONK! Actually, even if a guy pulls out, there's still a pretty good chance that you can get pregnant. A guy's erection oozes a little pre-cum (pre-ejaculatory fluid, for the science buffs out there)long before he ejaculates. The pre-cum can and often does have sperm in it, and it gets you pregnant almost as well as regular old cum. Nevermind the fact that most guys really do mean to pull out, but find it hard to do so once they're already there. Tsk. Use a condom, please.
If I have sex with a virgin, I don't need protection.	Safer sex is a habit best started from the beginning (a very good place to start.) Girl virgins can still get pregnant, and boy virgins can still get people pregnant. Besides, you don't know what somebody could pick up giving someone else oral sex... and trust me, you can still be a virgin and give great head.
What about the rhythm method?	Two words: Hell. No. For those of you not in the know, some people think that you can prevent pregnancy by figuring out the woman's cycle, and just not having sex when she's ovulating. This is dumb. Please listen to me when I say, this is dumb. A young woman's cycle can change at the drop of a hat; change of diet, change of weather, a little stress, change of environment; any of these things can cause a woman's menstrual cycle to be knocked off kilter. Hence, if you or your girlfriend or whatever happens to eat a Big Mac instead of a Filet O' Fish, both of you could be in deep lard.

"Whatchu talkin' bout, Willis?!" -Arnold Jackson  

That's all for now... look for more myths dispelled in the future.

See anything that needs correcting? Have a myth or fact to add? Just click down below...

Questions? Comments? Gross Inaccuracies? E-mail justlikeheaven@email.com and let me know
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