sunday, december 5

"Did I mention that the last time she came into town, conversation among us turned to foreign travel and I asked her if she wouldn't like to visit England? My friend Maria, the Lady St. Just, has offered her a standing invitation to be her guest at Wilbury, which I think would enchant Miss Rose. I mentioned this invitation, and added that I thought it could be arranged for her to meet the Queen of England. And without a moment's hesitation or the least lack of conviction, she replied, "I am the Queen of England." I suppose if you live in a dream world, it is nice to be queen in it." -- tennessee williams: memoirs. there is something insanely stressful about the night before the last day of classes. even a chronic procrastinator like me can feel it chewing relentlessly on my marrow. "last day. last chance. last day. last chance." i can almost hear the time pass towards that moment where it's all set and done. i don't think butterflies is the word for my current stomach condition. feels more like that overwhelming feeling one gets when a woman enters the elevator you're in and fills it with the thick, almost dripping smell of those flowery perfumes that were designed to cover up the stench of sour, layered body sweat and faeces two hundred years ago. definitely not designed for small spaces, like elevators, or women, for that matter. knowing that if i don't turn these 3 remaining papers in by 3 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, that's it. no more slack. last chance. last day. it's enough to drive a girl mad. --- i tried to find reviews of wilfred owen's anti-war poetry, i really did, but i couldn't. honest. that's okay. it meant i could redirect my energy to the next available topic: "autobiographical elements in 'the glass menagerie'." it seemed a chore enough. and then i discovered that the woman the glass menagerie's laura is based on, tennessee williams' in real life sister rose, was lobotomized. it seems she suffered from schizophrenia, and, as williams puts it: "she was a very normal - but highly sexed - girl who was tearing herself apart mentally and physically by those repressions imposed upon her by Miss Edwina's monolithic Puritanism." 6 hrs and 7 books on tennessee williams later i find myself wishing i'd have known this before. tennessee williams is interesting and all, but it is miss rose that has suddenly captivated me, and it is in miss rose company i find myself the night before the last day of classes, with 3 more hours to write 3 papers in. "You must never make fun of insanity. It's worse than death." -- Miss Rose Isabel Williams.

GOD says: "always is time too."

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