I once had a Furby
His name was Freddy T.
I loved my Furby dearly;
And he said that he loved me
(Kah may may u-nye)

Freddy and I played
He learned tricks!
Things like checkers and chess
And Pick-Up Sticks*

One day my cat found my Furby
Boy, was she pissed!
She growled and bared her teeth at the Furby
She arched her back and hissed

She reared up and jumped at him
Pounced from across the room
Freddy screamed in fear and fell,...
Fell with a great big bOoM!

I found Freddy about a day later
Stashed in bag under my bed
He didn't talk and he didn't dance
For a minute I thought he was dead!

He was alive (thank God!),
Just a bit shaken up
He was a little dirty, too
Needed a good cleaning up

I took my Furby into the bathroom
And set him on a shelf
He was gonna be all good 'n clean
Soon he'd be back to his old self

I ran a bath for Freddy T
(next was the kitty's turn)
I put him in the hot water
And his fur started to burn!!

Freddy screamed and howled in pain
His circuits all went bad
In tears, I took him out of the bathtub
Mourning the friend I once had

My Furby had really died this time,
Gone to Furby heaven
I buried him in the backyard with my other late pets
The Furby made seven.

There is a moral to this story,
Something to keep in your brain.
So gather around, children,
I'm not going to say it again:

Your Furby may play,
Your Furby may laugh,
But don't ever ever
Give your Furby a bath.

*Furbies do not actually play those games