Kian was acting on automatic pilot. He had just phoned his parents. He lifted the phone of the cradle again and dialled a number. It rang a few times before he heard a sleepy hello. ‘Ro?’ ‘Kian? Do you have any idea how late it is?’ Kian ignored him. ‘Can I speak with Yvonne please?’ ‘Why?’ ‘Just put Yvonne on the phone.’ Whispered Kian. ‘Hang on.’ Kian waited. ‘Hello?’ ‘Yvonne?’ ‘Kian, what’s wrong? Why are you calling so late?’ Kian started crying again. ‘She lost the baby. I’m in the hospital.’ ‘Oh god.’ Kian barely heard Yvonne talking to him. ‘I’m coming right over.’ Kian nodded.
It must have been a weird sight. Kian held on to the phone as if was the only thing that kept him sane. Ronan had hung up minutes before but somehow Kian found the dialling tone comforting. He startled when Yvonne took receiver out of his hand. Kian stared at her like she was a stranger. Yvonne wrapped an arm around him and guided him back to the cold and uncomfortable plastic seats. ‘What did the doctor tell you? Have you seen a doctor?’ Kian nodded. ‘She had a miscarriage. They don’t know why. They barely managed to save her life.’ Yvonne held him tight as he started crying again. She rubbed his back until he calmed down a little. ‘Did she complain about stomach ache before?’ Kian shook his head. ‘She was tired and wanted to take a shower. I was listening to the tape Mark gave me when I suddenly heard her scream. I ran to the bathroom and there was blood streaming down her leg. I was so scared. I thought I was going to loose her.’ Did the doctor say you could see her? Shall I ask for her room number?’ Kian nodded. Yvonne walked to the nurses station and was given the room number Jaclyn was in now.

Kian got cold feet right before he went inside. ‘I can’t do this. She must blame me. She will hate me.’ Yvonne looked at Kian. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was as pale as his white shirt. ‘Do you want me to go in first?’ Kian nodded. Yvonne gave him a comforting kiss on the cheek and went inside. Jaclyn was lying in a bed with her back towards the door. Yvonne walked round the bed. Jaclyn was awake. ‘Hey sweetie.’ Jaclyn looked at Yvonne. ‘What are you doing here?’ She asked surprised. ‘Where is Kian?’ ‘Kian is outside. He called me.’ Jaclyn looked at her hand. ‘How are you feeling sweetie.’ Jaclyn covered her face with her hands and started crying. Yvonne sat down on the bed and pulled the sobbing girl in her arms. ‘Shh. Shh.’ ‘I feel so bad.’ Hiccuped Jaclyn in between sobs. ‘Don’t honey. It’s not your fault.’ ‘It is.’ Jaclyn raised her head. ‘It’s all my fault. Shane kissed me this evening and I enjoyed it. It felt just like the old times and look how I’m being punished.’ Jaclyn started to rock back and forth. ‘I was angry when he kissed me but later that was the only thing I could think about.’ Jaclyn looked Yvonne straight in the eyes. ‘I still love Shane.’

Kian slowly let go of the door. He had finally gathered enough courage to go inside when he heard what Jaclyn said. He ran his hand through his hair. He had not only lost his child but his girlfriend too. Tears burned in his eyes but he didn’t want to cry. He staggered to the phone. He picked up the phone and dialled a number he hadn’t ringed in months. This time no one answered but he got the answer machine. Kian took a deep breath. ‘Well Shane, congratulations. You won. I can’t fight you anymore. I tried to erase the feelings she had. But I failed. Jaclyn is yours.’ Suddenly someone picked up. ‘I never knew you would give up so easily.’ Kian bit his lip. ‘She still loves you. She lost the only thing that attached me to her tonight.’ All Kian heard was Shane’s soft breathing. ‘You mean?’ ‘She had a miscarriage.’ ‘Oh god. I’m sorry Kian. I never…’ ‘Don’t say it. She needs you right now.’ ‘What about you?’ Kian laughed harshly. ‘I’ll get over it. After all I can’t loose what I never had.’ Kian heard Shane walk around. ‘I’m sorry man.’ ‘Just get here.’ Kian hung up. He rested his head against the cold tiles. He slowly sank to the ground. He wrapped his arms around his knees and buried his head in his arms. Slowly sobs shook his body. Several people passed him but no one dared to touch him or even ask him if he was ok.